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Johnny POV

"Johnny?"

I felt a wave of pain sear through my stomach. I felt sick, like a monster who just killed millions of people by just passing by.

I inched closer, and came into perfect contact with her form.

I put my fingers to her mask, and slowly inched it off of her, seeing her weary, teary eyes. She blinked a few times, and smiled at me.

"Johnny."

I pulled my mask off, and stared back to her immediately.

"Lulu.."

She wrapped her arms around my neck, and cried silently into my neck. I wrapped my arms around her waist, and held her close, and extra tight.

I could feel my throat closing up around me. I couldn't breath. So I just decided to let go, and cried a tad.

She pulled back slowly, and just sobbed joyfully.

"I missed you so much Johnny."

"Lulu, I love you so much. I'm so sorry. What I did…I cant ever loose you again."

I watched her as she got tense, and her face shook a little, and she blinked more, probably trying to get her blurry tears out of her way of looking at me.

She inched backwards, and looked at me, pained.

"No, Johnny…I cant…I…"

I looked to the floor, and back to her, but she wasn't there.

I scanned the room frantically.

"LULU?"

I shouted, and paced throughout the room.

I exited the ballroom, and walked into the large entry-way.

"Lulu!"

I looked around, but saw nothing.

Damn it!

Lulu POV

I sobbed harder into my hands, and slammed my head against the wall.

"Love?"

I quickly wiped my tears away, and turned around, facing Ethan.

I smiled at him, and ran to him, and wrapped myself into him.

"I love you Ethan."

He smiled against me, and replied.

"I love you too love, but you don't have to say that…what's the matter Lulu?"

I backed up from him, and he massaged my shoulders, looking sympathetically at me.

"Johnny…he…I saw him…In the ballroom…He said…he loves me…I cant…Ethan."

I sobbed harder, and pulled myself into his tight chest.

He ran his hand in my hair, and whispered in my ear, trying to calm me down.

"Its alright love, Everything will be okay. I promise."

After we got home, I locked myself into the bedroom, and went for the phone, searching the phone directory frantically for the number.

Johnny POV

I went back to the car, and slammed my forehead into the steering wheel, and pulled the car into reverse, pulling out of the lot.

I drove into the road, and kept going, for miles, and miles. I needed to get away.

35 minutes later, I pulled up to the deserted Haunted Starr.

I got out of the car, and stepped onto the boat's platform, and rounded my way to the entrance, and stepped inside.

I looked around at the dark room, and walked over to where I automatically knew was the window, and yanked the drapes open.

I looked back into the room, and saw Lulu, in her form, where she was standing the first night we made love. I broke down, and fell to my knees.

She watched me, unsympathetic, and then, she was gone.

Just a fragment of my imagination. I needed her like I needed air, and without her, I was dying. Suffocating.

I lit candles, and walked over to the piano, and started Clair de Lune.

Lulu POV

"New York Medical Intense Care Institution; Mark speaking."

"Hello, um, when would be a good time to come in for a visit? The name is Michael Corinthos."

"Well, we don't close for another 2 hours, and 55 minutes. How far are you?"

"About 45 minutes. I'll come tonight thank you."

"You're welcome Ma'am."

I changed into my jeans, white tank with the multi color flowers, and white cardigan, and exited the bedroom.

Ethan was in the kitchen, sitting at the table, drinking a glass of water.

"I need to go out for a little. I'll be back later."

"Okay love. Be careful."

"I will. Bye."

I took the elevator to the parking floor, and found the car, and got in.

About a little over 45 minutes later, I arrived at the institution.

I walked in, and headed over to the main desk.

"I'm looking for a Michael Corinthos please."

"You're relation Ma'am?"

"I'm Michael's cousin, Lesley Lu Spencer."

"Ah yes, Ms. Spencer. Mr. Corinthos is in room 417."

"Thank you."

She nodded, and gave me the key.

I found Michael's room, and opened the door.

I shut the door behind me, and placed the keys on the dresser next to me, and draped my coat on the light blue armchair next to Michael's bed.

I sat down, and took Michael's hand.

"Hey Michael. It's Lulu. I'm actually here to get your consent. I know you cant actually tell me anything, but I already know what you would tell me. To be happy, even if I was letting down your Dad, your mother, and you. That's just who you are sweetie."

"It's Johnny. I'm just not strong enough honey. I know I should hate him for putting you in this position, but I love him so much. I saw him for the first time in almost eight months tonight at the town's mystery ball. It was like when I saw your Aunt Laura wake up."

"I don't know what to do. I want to be strong, and stand up for you

But I think we both know I'm just not that strong. See, sweetie, Johnny didn't mean to hurt you, but the thing is, that he did. And that's hard to live with. I know he is hurting, as well as we all are. But I just cant keep on living this way. Some days I feel like I'm going crazy because some days I wish I could trade spots with you. Escape my life. But I shouldn't think that way. No one should ever be in this position. Especially you Michael."

"But you have to know, that I'm lost without Johnny. I know that you're mom and dad didn't work out, but I think that maybe Johnny and I can still fix it."

I got up from the chair.

"I love you sweetie. I'll see you soon. Bye honey."

I kissed his forehead, and walked out the door, and headed for the parking lot.

Johnny POV

I put my head in my hands, when suddenly, I heard doors slam. I instantly shot up, and grabbed my coat quickly, and headed over toward the back door.

"Wait."

I knew that voice so well. I turned around, and locked my eyes with hers.

"Lulu,"

"Johnny…don't. I want to hear anything you have to say. I came here because I knew that you'd be here. It's where we first started."

Lulu POV

I ran my hand over the rail, and stepped down the stairs, coming closer into contact with him.

I looked back at him.

"It feels like forever since we were here. It's been a little while, hu?"

I shot my head up, and looked into his eyes.

He started coming towards me, dropping his jacket to the floor.

"Yea…too long."

Her came right up to my face, and ever so gently took my face into his hand. "I need you Lulu. I can't live without you."

I shut my eyes, and leaned into his hand, and then he lowered his lips to mine.

I kissed him back, hesitantly.

~FLASHBACK~

"Lulu…we need to talk."

"Johnny…I'm fine, okay? This had nothing to do with you, or your family, and don't blame yourself, okay?"

"It's not about that Lulu…I've been keeping something from you, for too, too long."

I looked into his eyes, warily, and opened my lips to speak, be he cut me off.

"I cant keep lying to you Lulu…telling you I've changed, that we can work, and keep believing that I can be a normal man, and give you a good life, a future that you deserve, when I can't."

"Johnny…you cant be saying you're leaving because I---"

"I was involved with your cousin's shooting Lulu."

I sat there frozen.

"You shot him?"

"N--NO. I didn't…but I---I didn't stop it."

"So you knew."

"No, I didn't know Michael was there…but…"

"No, Johnny, you took part in shooting a LITTLE BOY, intentional, or not… I CANT EVEN LOOK AT YOU! Just go! GET OUT!"

He didn't put up a fuss.

He just got up, and walked toward the door.

"I love you Lulu. Always."

I shut my eyes, and let the tears fall down my face.

~END OF FLASHBACK~

I shot my head away, remembering that night.

"I'm sorry Lulu…it's just…God. I miss you so much."

"It's not your fault Johnny. I'm sorry the way I acted, you didn't know what to do."

"No. Lulu…that's no excuse. That kid id in that bed for the rest of his life, and I could have prevented that. That will haunt me forever."

I walked close to him, and put my hand on his shoulders.

"I've always loved you. I missed you so much Johnny. I cant breathe without you. I need you with me."

"I'm right here."

He pulled me into his chest, and stroked my hair.

"Make me forget. Make love to me Johnny."

Johnny POV

Her words were of those I've been waiting for 8 long, excruciating months.

I kissed her ear, and slowly rubbed slow circles on her back.

I grabbed her neck, and turned her face to mine, and kissed her lips, full, and hard.

"I. Love. You" I mumbled in between kisses.

She tasted of sugar, and peach.

Her scent overpowered me. It was the perfume I bought her for her birthday. It was a scent between white blossoms, freesia, and pear. It fit her so well.

She nodded, and greedily took my shirt off. I knew she was so vulnerable, and I wanted to make her better, but I knew that by doing this wouldn't just fix her, but I continued anyways. I needed to.

I caressed her neck with my hand, and lowered the other to the bottom of her white Cardigan, slowly undoing the buttons. I followed by slowly rising her multi-color flowery tank and took it ff of her, leaving her in her jeans, and her blue bra.

I let my hand slide to the back of her bra and undo the clasp, and slowly kiss her collarbone, sliding the straps off her shoulders, and letting it fall to the floor.

I picked her up by her thighs, and rose her to the top of the piano, letting my hands sneak to her button and zipper.

I unzipped it slowly, and undid the button.

I needed her right this second, but I wanted this to be a special night. I wanted her back to me. And I had every intention of getting her back.

She took her hands down to my stomach, and down to my throbbing erection, She yanked down the zipper, and shoved my jeans down, and I went back to hers.

I slowly, carefully, pulled the jeans down her legs, and she kicked them off her feet.

She got up off the piano, and I led her over to the window bed, and quickly closed the curtain, and laid her down on the thin mattress.

I quickly remembered the man she was with at the ball. Shit, I was taking advantage of her, and pushing her into an affair. I quickly stopped, and she looked at me, confused.

"Lulu…you're boyfriend…the guy at the ball--"

"No, Ethan, he doesn't mean anything to me…I love you. Please."

"But you're still with him Lulu…you're cheating on him. I cant do this until you end it with him."

"Fine, I'll call him."

She reached onto the table next to her, and picked up her cell. I knew It wasn't a good idea to break it off with somebody over the phone, but right now, I just didn't care. Unless it was me.

"Ethan…I'm so sorry.."

I took this chance to torment her.

I took one of her nipples into my mouth, and she moaned loudly, and I chuckled against her breast.

"I'm so--sorry---E---Ethan."

She quickly closed the phone, and threw it to the floor.

I kissed her on the lips once more, and let my hand wander to the hem of her panties.

She exhaled shakily, and her body trembled, aching.

I just wanted to rip them off of her, and bury into her.

I pushed them down her legs, and she didn't the same to my boxers.

I looked to her, and instantly froze. I didn't have anything.

"Oh shit Lulu…we can't do this…I don't have anything."

Lulu POV

SHIT! HE DIDN'T HAVE A CONDOM! BUT I NEED HIM!

"I--It's okay, I'm on the ---the pill." I lied.

"You sure?"

"Y--Yea. Keep going."

Crap.

Johnny POV

I positioned myself at her entrance, and slowly, eased into her. Oh god. How long I ached to be back in this position.

She arched her back up onto me, and I pushed all the way into her, and grasped her hips.

"I love you Johnny. Ah."

"I love you too Lulu."

I pulled out of her, and thrusted back into her, and started a slow rhythm, taking my time with her. I wanted to stay here forever.

I pulled out again, and pushed back in, repeating this rhythm.

She raked her nails up my back, and bucked her hips upward.

"Johnny. Faster. Please."

I obliged, and started a little faster, but careful not to go too fast just yet.

She shouted out my name, and came onto me, and that set me off, and I came, following her.

I collapsed on top of her, and she ran her hand through my hair. Her chest heaved, fast, from her heavy breaths.

"Johnny.."

"Yea Lu?"

"I just want to be normal. Just stay together like normal boyfriend and girlfriend. Just loving each other. No talk about your not good for me, and how you've done horrible, and unforgivable things. Kay?"

I looked into her eyes, and brought my hand to her cheek, and kissed her neck.

I whispered into her ear, sucking on her lobe.

"Yea."

She exhaled shakily, and flipped us over, starting our round two.

Morning

Lulu POV

I looked around, and everything was bright, and Johnny was sitting on the floor underneath me, staring at me.

I smiled faintly at him.

"Hey."

"Morning. You hungry?"

" at all. I feel more like sick than hungry."

I got up form the window bed, and sat down at the piano bench. I had a headache, and was sore all over. Probably from our rounds last night. We went all the way to six.

"I'm sorry Lu…I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Please Johnny…I wanted to…it isn't your fault. It by far the best night of my life."

He smiled at me. "Me too."

He came and sat down next to me.

"Can I live with you?"

"Lulu…my place…it isn't…that great."

"I don't care. It's away from here. It's with you."

"You'll regret that once you see the place…trust me Lulu…"

I got up, and walked around, still completely naked.(A/N-AHA!)

He chuckled, and turned my head back to him.

He got up, and handed me the throw.

"Thanks."

"No problem."

"Lulu…I need to tell you…my whole life…it's been about you. Even when I didn't know it. I want to make it up to you."

"Johnny…you don't owe me anything. If anything under those circumstances, I owe you."

"Uh-Uh…you owe me nothing. I deserve everything you did to me."

"Not everything Johnny. I told you I didn't want you anymore, when that was the farthest thing from the truth. I wanted you more than ever in that moment you walked out the door. That day still haunts me."

He walked over to me, looking pained, and wrapped his arms around me.

"It's okay. I'm here now, that's all that matters. We spent so much time living in the future, and didn't take time to live in the present. I'm not making that mistake again."

"Me either."

I turned around to face him, and kissed him.

"I want to take you out today. You like Carnivals?"

I smiled. "Yea. I like carnivals."

"Good."

"But first, I want to show you how much I love you."

He chuckled, and pulled the blanket off me.

At Johnny's apartment in New Jersey

Johnny POV

I was sitting on the couch, waiting for Lulu to get out of my bedroom, so we could leave for the carnival.

She finally came out, dressed in light boot leg jeans, followed by a chestnut belt, with a gray halter, and a deep blue Cardigan, with classic white sneakers.(PIC ON PRO.)Her hair was straight, and she had very light makeup on. God I loved her so much.

"Ready"

'Yea, let's go."

I led her out to the parking lot, and opened up the red mustang's car door, and went into the drivers seat.

"I missed this car."

I laughed, and leaned over to her ear."I missed you." And I kissed her ear.

She giggled, and pulled her knees up to her chest, and rolling down her window, smiling as the wind blew her hair in her face. I turned to her, and smiled at her.

"God you're so beautiful."

"Well thank you sir. You're not so bad yourself."

She continued laughing until we pulled up to the ticket booth.

She shouted out the window.

"We're in love!" And she pointed to me. I smiled at her, and the man just smirked at her. She giggled, and pounced back into her seat.

She turned her head to me. "I love you!"

I got out and opened her door, reaching out my hand. "I love you too Lu."

She laughed, and took my hand, and climbed out of the car.

We walked into the Carnival, and she pointed to the Elephant ride.

"Lulu…seriously?"

"Yes, now come on!" She pulled my hand, and we handed our ticket's to the woman, who looked at me strangely like I was on drugs. The things I did for her.

She pulled me into one of the little elephant riders, and sat down.

I sat down beside her.

She laughed at me, and I looked to her. "I cant believe I'm doing this."

"I can."

She giggled, and kissed me, and the ride started.

Once we started on it, she started laughing continuously, and I laughed at the sight of her.

After the ride was over, we walked through the park, and she stopped at one of the little counters, filled with the paintballs, and slipped a 5 dollar bill to the guy, and he handed us 10 darts.

She threw one, and popped the balloon, and she smiled, and threw another. I threw one, and popped an orange one. She looked over to me. "You are very talented!"

I laughed at her. "Thanks."

She threw the rest of hers, and then, we walked away. She stopped in her tracks, and I held her hand in mine. She was looking at a big, brown bear. I knew she wanted it.

I lowered my lips to her ear.

"See something you like?"

"Johnny…I don't know how to play basketball. Can you?"

"Of course."

We walked over to the stand, and I handed the girl a 5, and threw the balls.

I got her the bear.

"I'll pay you back later. Don't worry."

I smiled at the thought.

After we finished about 7 rides, she was tired, and just wanted to walk around.

I got her cotton candy, and we sat down on one of the park benches.

She climbed onto my lap, and swayed her hair to one shoulder.

She picked off a large string of cotton candy, and held it in front of my mouth."Open your mouth."

I opened my mouth, and she placed it in, and attached her lips with mine, and I took her waist into my arms.

After we finished the cotton candy, she was excessively tired, so I just took her home.

Once we got into the apartment, she stumbled into the kitchen, and came out, holding a bottle of vodka, and two glasses.

She was up to no good.

"Lets get drunk." She whispered.

I smiled, and walked over to her.

I sat down beside her, and she poured the first shots.

After about 15, she was so wasted, So was I.

She took my hand, and started laughing hysterically.

"Haha Johnny…I fucking love you."

I toppled her onto the bed, and replied. "I love you too, too fucking much babe."

She giggled at me, and we had sex for hours, and hours.

Morning

Lulu POV

I felt like shit. I had a hangover, and remembered nothing of last night, beyond the point of getting home.

I looked next to me, at Johnny. God he was a mess. His hair was disheveled. It was all over the place. He had nail marks on his chest, and red blotches all over his face, I had to laugh at the sight.

I got out of the bed, not caring of my nudeness.

I stumbled shakily over to the mirror to have a look at myself.

I looked just about the same.

My makeup was smudged, my hair in every which way, I Had the same red blotches on my face, and neck, and I noticed red, on my hip. I turned around, and looked In the mirror. My entire ass was completely red, and it stung.

I turned around, and the entire room just smelt of sex, sex, sex, and more sex.

I walked into the bathroom, and quickly took a shower. Johnny was still asleep.

I got back into bed, and wrapped my arms around him. He woke up, and turned over and locked his eyes with mine.

"Morning beautiful" He mumbled.

"Morning."

He groaned, and wrapped his arms around me.

He sighed, and kissed my neck, up to my lips.

"I love you so, so, so much."

I laughed. "Me too Johnny. Me too."

I kissed him, and relaxed in his arms.

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