Johnathan woke up to the birds chirping. He sat up and rubbed his lower back. The bed was so tough. Johnathan decided to see if Alexxa wanted to go out for breakfast. He went downstairs and saw Alexxa making pies. He closed the door and she looked up.

"Morning," She said.

She took a pan of uncooked pies and put them in the oven.

"Good morning," said Johnathan and he goes to the booth, "Breakfast?"

"I don't eat," says Alexxa, "There is a shop down the street that sells meat pies."

"Well I could just have one of your delicious meat pies," said Johnathan with a smile.

Alexxa looked at him and said, "You wouldn't want to. Their...not delicious."

"But you do sell them," said Johnathan.

"Just barely," said Alexxa, "They're very bad."

Johnathan smiled, he came over and said, "They can't be that bad."

(Alexxa)

You should sit down

Go sit

(Johnathan sits down)

I don't have customers for weeks

You really shouldn't have a bite but oh well

Some people think we have the plague

You will need a drink of ale

I know why nobody cares to take them,
I should know,
I make them,
But good? No!
The worst pies in London
Even that's polite!
The worst pies in London

(Serves Johnathan a fresh hot pie from the oven)

If you doubt it take a bite

(Johnathan takes a bite and looks disgusted)

Is that just disgusting?

You have to concede it

Its nothing but crusting

Here drink this you need it

(Hands Johnathan a cup of ale)

And no wonder with the price of meat

What it is

When you get it

Never

Thought I'd live to see the day

Men'd think it was a treat

Findin' poor

Animals

Wot are dyin' in the street

Miss Mooney had a pie shop

Did a business until I noticed something weird

Saw her neighbors' cats disappeared

Have to hand it to her--

Wot I calls

Enterprise

Too bad the Judge didn't see it that way

No denying times is hard, sir

Even harder than the worst pies in London!

Only lard and nothing more--

Is that just revolting,

All greasy and gritty

It looks like its molting,

And tastes like

Well, pity

A woman alone,

With limited wind,

And the worst pies in London!

Ah, sir, times is hard,

Times is hard!

"Your not alone anymore," said Jonathan.

Alexxa looked angry and put more pies in, Johnathan smiled and said, "I didn't mean no offense."

"You did mean it though," said Alexxa.

Johnathan put his hands on the counter and said, "So tell me about your murderous grandfather."

Alexxa looked down and said, "Oh...you know."

"Yes, I know about the devil barber of fleet street," said Johnathan.

"I was afraid you would not stay here," said Alexxa, "If you knew about the black sheep of my family."

"I'm not afraid of a dead barber," said Johnathan, "Tell me the story."

Alexxa looked at his blue eyes and said, "Fine."

(Alexxa)

There was a barber and his wife

and she was beautiful...

a foolish barber and his wife.

She was his reason and his life...

and she was beautiful and she was virtuous

And he was naïve.

There was another man who saw

that she was beautiful...

A pious vulture of the law

who, with a gesture of his claw

removed the barber from plate!

Then there was nothing but to wait!

And she would fall!

So soft! So young!

So lost and oh so beautiful!

Many years later

He came back to get back at the pious vulture of the law

He waited, attacked others, planned with a mischievous soul not unlike his own

And then committed the crime he wanted

And got a death he deserved

'Why?" Johnathan asked.

(Alexxa)

He had this wife, you see

Pretty little thing, silly little nit

Had her chance for the moon on a string

Poor thing! Poor Thing...

There was this judge, you see

Wanted her like mad

Everyday he'd send her a flower

But did she come down from her tower?

Sat up there and sobbed by the hour

Poor fool.

Ah but there was worse yet to come, poor thing...

The Beadle calls on her, all polite

Poor thing, poor thing

"The Judge," he tells her, "is all contrite, "He blames himself

for her dreadful plight. She MUST come come straight to

his house tonight!" Poor thing, poor thing!

Of course when she goes there, poor thing, poor thing!

They're having this ball all in masks

There's no one she knows there, poor dear, poor thing

She wanders tormented and DRINKS, poor thing!

'The Judge has repented,' she thinks, poor thing

"Oh where is Judge Turpin?" she asks...

...He was there alright! Only not so contrite

She wasn't no match for such craft, you see

And everyone thought it so droll!

They figured she had to be daft, you see

So all them stood there and laughed, you see

Poor soul! Poor thing!

"That's horrible," says Johnathan disgusted and saddened.

(Alexxa)

More happened just that month

She was saddened and disgusted as you are

Right now, right then

She goes to the apothecary

Gets a potion, a very bad potion

She takes it, that very night at Mrs. Lovett's sight

She didn't die but she did in her mind

Well horrid Lovett dislikes her much

So she throws her out

Ms. Lovett thought she was daft and dull

So out the door she did go, poor thing! Poor soul!

Well Sweeney when he finds out

He's angry like and throws the poor Mrs. Lovett in the oven

The blasted place under this kitchen

And now still sometimes you can here her screams

Poor soul! Dead thing!

Alexxa smiled and said, "Buts that only rumors. Let me get changed and we can go to the market. Get some delicious pork for afternoon tea.

And Alexxa upstairs.