Running
"You're running to a breakthrough
There's no where else to go
You're reaching for the sunshine,
The sunshine, the sunshine."
-Tears by After Edmund
I'd left Peter and Charlotte as soon as we hit Canada. It was fall of 1944 and I was still a little on edge—I'd realized how much of my life…existence I'd wasted on Maria.
Peter and Charlotte were upset when I left, but I convinced them that I had no intentions to go back to Maria. Truth be told, I realized that I couldn't stand the companionship anymore.
The constant high of emotions, the love and the lust everything made me sick to my stomach.
And then there were other emotions. The fear, the hatred. Whenever I hunted I felt that horror the moment before my teeth found purchase on a neck.
I started to starve myself. I would wait until I couldn't stand it anymore, until I was so far gone that I would be so blinded by thirst that the emotions that were constantly buzzing into my system were second to the impenetrable heat in my throat.
I was thirsty again, and soon I would need to hunt.
"I can't do this anymore," I mumbled to myself. I ran my fingers through my hair. It was dirty and encrusted with blood. My clothes were in worse shape than my hair.
I laughed darkly and kept walking into the woods. I sniffed my clothes; I smelled of human perspiration and dried blood.
There was a small river winding through the woods, it cut into the landscape like a dark ribbon of water. It smelled fresh, so I stripped of my clothes and washed them against the rocks at the shore. I left them there to dry as I swam out into the deeper parts of the water.
I could feel that the water was cold, but it didn't bother me. I scrubbed furiously at my hair trying to wash the dirt and blood away.
'Jasper come in from the pond!' Mama would've called.
I would have argued and kept floating on my back, enjoying being outside.
But Mama wasn't there, not in the woods in Virginia or Maryland I couldn't even remember—my Mama was in some Texas graveyard in a coffin, and I was here swimming around this lake in a state that I couldn't name and I was still a monster, and nothing was going to change that.
"What am I doing here?" I asked aloud as if God would answer me.
I stayed in the water until the sun rose and my skin cast prism-like rainbows against the surrounding foliage.
I put my clothes back on and continued to travel north, or south. I wasn't entirely sure. I've come to realize in those few months and years after I left Maria and I was an empty shell of what I could have been. Maybe I'd sinned so much that I would never be whole.
Jasper tucked his chin to his chest as he curled into himself, his back pressed against the trunk of a thick pine tree. He looked as if he would cry if he could. His hair had curled a little from his prior dip in the river.
He started to laugh darkly, then. Not mirthful or happy. Just a dark, morose rumble deep in his chest that permeated throughout the dense foliage making the leaves quiver.
"I'm so thirsty," he mumbled after his laughing fit.
He groaned as he stood and stretched backwards as if his back would pop. It didn't nor would it ever.
He swiveled his head around, searching for smells when his face broke into a smile. Not a breathtaking smile. A malicious, predatory grin like a cat after a mouse.
His muscles coiled as he was about to spring, his dark eyes trained on something beyond the horizon
The lithe, cat-like movement of his muscles was exhilarating; he bounded past trees into a smaller clearing. There was a loose circle of men around the fire, laughing and eating venison.
They looked unwashed and gruff—but happy, alive, nonetheless.
Jasper was on the outskirts of their camp within seconds of catching their decadent scent, and then two of the men's necks were rent open within the next minute. For the final two kills he took his time.
Enjoying the terrified emotions as if he were on some pernicious high. His eyes, sick and red with hunger and excitement danced around their faces. Their faces, flushed with red, wet blood.
Finally there was just one man left; he clutched his 12-gauge in white-knuckled fingers, whispering something. Jasper stopped his assault for a moment—pausing to listen.
"…yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death…"
And then Jasper lurched forward.
"No!" I screamed, my eyes popping open. "Don't!"
I scrubbed one of my hands across my face and stared out the window of my hotel room, out across the cityscape. Towering factories with billows of foul-smelling smoke and a red horizon.
"Please, Jasper," I begged, clutching at my short, dark hair, "don't hurt him."
But Jasper wouldn't hear me.
I had to find him. Locate him, make sure he was alright.
The sun peaked out of the cloud cover, orange against the blood in the sky.
I closed my eyes again.
Jasper ran through the forest, screaming. His raw, bestial emotion echoing from the trees.
"I can't do this," he chanted, "I can't do this. Can't do this. Can't."
He pressed the back of his hand to his bloody mouth, "Somebody, oh God, somebody help me. Somebody!"
I sobbed dryly, unable to watch anymore.
"I want to save Jasper. I want to help him," I whispered aloud and then gasped.
"Welcome to Alfie's Diner, can I interest you in one of our famous cheese-steaks?" A bored waitress drawled.
"No," I replied distractedly, "I think I'll just have some coffee."
She nodded and disappeared behind the chrome-rimmed counter. I sat on a bar stool, twisting it around so that I could stare out the door.
It was a rainy day, dark and damp just the way my kind normally liked them.
"Here you are, ma'am," the waitress said, materializing at my elbow with a cup of lukewarm coffee.
"Thanks," I murmured, staring at the brown liquid.
The little bell above the door tinkled, piquing my interest. I turned to stare, unabashedly as he walked in.
His blonde hair was wet and matted to his forehead in thin strands. His back stiffened when he caught sight of me; but I smiled, triumphant.
The hostess hesitantly made a movie to approach him, but he waved her off. She nodded, clutching the menus to her chest like a protect shield. I noticed one last thing before I brought my attention back to Jasper's glorious face.
'Alfie's Diner: Home of the Best Cheese-Steak in all of Philadelphia'.
This is going to be a long author's note. So grab some popcorn and a soda and sit back and read.
First and foremost, if you haven't checked out my submission to the Epic T Rated Contest go do that after you read this, it's called "Creeping Dose".
Secondly, I know it's been a while since I updated this story. I did a lot of thinking about it, and I've decided I'm only going to continue this story up until Jasper and Alice's meeting. There are a lot of good stories out there about after Jasper and Alice met, and I kind of feel like I won't be able to compare, or that it will be the same-old, same-old. So I'm just going to go up until the "You've Kept Me Waiting" part. I may do an epilogue of when Jasper realizes he met Alice before she was changed. I don't know yet. I'm really sorry if you were looking forward to some long story--but I just can't do it. I adore this story, but constantly writing it will get old and I kind of feel like I'll lose passion for it. I don't want that because I feel like this is one of the best things I've written. I won't make it just another obligation.
Thirdly, about this chapter--if you hadn't noticed, it switches POVs. Just thought I'd clarify if anyone was confused. Yes, Jasper was naked earlier. Fan Service. [laughs] Alfie's Diner: Home of the Best Cheese-Steak in all of Philadelphia is completely fictional. There may be an Alfie's Diner out there, and they may have darn good Cheese-Steak, but I've never been to Philadelphia, so I wouldn't know. All I do know is that I want a Cheese-Steak know. Bother.
Fourthly, the song at the beginning of this chapter is "Tears" by After Edmund. They're a little known band--so YouTube them or look them up on Project Playlist. I've actually had the pleasure of seeing them in concert. Now, look at how close you are to your computer screen right now that's how close I was to their lead singer. It was awesome. They're much better in concert than they are on the CD. My friends and I also got to talk with them before they played, it was pretty awesome. They were really down to earth and cool, it was neat.
Fifthly, REVIEW. Seriously. It really does make my day when you guys review and tell me what you think.