I do not own any of the beautiful characters of Twilight

Ok so this one isn't my best and definately not my favourite because Edward isn't my favourite, so I'm sorry all you Jacob fans, but the story wouldn't make so much sense without a litlle bit of Edward in it. Sorry its not my best work and it could have been better, so please pretty please read and review and ill have the next chapter out in a few days!! :P enjoy PLEASE REVIEW AND GIVE ME SOME IDEAS!!! TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT AND ILL WRITE IT!!!

Edward

chapter 4: DARKNESS

The wind blew my already tangled bronze hair around my face and into my eyes. I ran in the shadows, avoiding the light. Not that anyone was around to see me, but I hated seeing my granite skin "sparkle" in the sunlight.

I shouldn't be doing this, I shouldn't be doing this.

Bella.

The two thoughts practically tore my body in two. My still heart ached for just one glimpse of her, just one touch, just one kiss . . . But my head told me to stay away, to leave her alone, and to let her be. In the end, she was better off without me. I couldn't stand not being with her, not being around her. I missed the feeling of her soft body against mine, they way her smell messed with my thoughts and intoxicated my brain. Her very presence made it hard to think. Her name made me want to cry, yet my dry eyes didn't spill a tear. I couldn't grieve for her like a normal person; I couldn't live without her or try to move on like she could. Because I wasn't a normal person. I was a vampire. Sick and inhumane. My existence went against the very rights of science. If only I didn't exist. She would have been able to live a normal, happy life, I would have died in 1901 just as fait had permitted. Death had strolled by, sunk its teeth into my neck and disintegrated my now dry veins.

I should be dead,

But I wasn't.

I stopped as soon as I reached the forest border, right near her house. Anticipation suddenly became present. It surprised me greatly. I hadn't felt emotion since the day I turned my back on the most beautiful thing in the world. Turned my back on the entire reason for my existence. I walked forward slowly, just faster than human pace and stood directly under her window.

Just one peek. I would just take one look and then leave. I looked up at the sky, it was about four. I would wait a little bit longer, until I knew for sure she was in her bed and asleep. I turned on my heels and ran back into the forest.

Just one more hour, I told myself. It was about eight o'clock by now. The moon shone brightly in the starless sky. I was sure she wouldn't be asleep yet. But I couldn't wait any longer. I had to see, to know for sure if she was alright. I ran through the forest, this time, coming from behind the house. I crept in from the back until I came to her window, without a thought to stop me; I climbed up the wall and quietly peered in though the shut window. There she lay, under a heap of covers, breathing deeply, fast asleep. I needed to get a closer look; I needed to speak with her, just to hear her voice.

But I shouldn't. I had promised I wouldn't. I needed to stick to my promise and leave. I had seen her, saw her breathing, and heard her moist, mouth-watering heart beat. I knew she was alright, now it was time to leave.

But I needed to hear her voice, smell her scent, touch her soft, fragile skin. I wanted her to know I was here.

I tapped quietly on the window, yet loud enough to wake her up.

"C'mon Bella, just wake up." I whispered to myself. Yet deep down, in this body of stone, I wished she wouldn't.

She stirred under the blankets, and sat up in her bed. Her body frozen with fear and dread. What could have made this reaction. Suddenly, she got up from the bed and opened the window. My face was obscured by the darkness; she couldn't have known who I was.

"What are you doing Jake?" She whispered angrily. Her voice sent sparks of electricity run through my body. It awoke my senses and stitched up my silent heart.

Jake? Jacob Black? What on Earth would Jacob be doing climbing in through her window?

"You shouldn't be here, go to sleep." She reached up to pull the window down.

"It's not Jacob." I whispered. I waited for her reaction, but there was none. She just froze, her arms outstretched, closing around the steel frame of the window. Her hand shook at her side and her lip trembled. Her eyes were wide with disbelief and sadness. Why would she be sad? Had I hurt her that much that she didn't want to see me again? Had I made a mistake coming back? "Bella?" I whispered, "It's me Edward." I felt like a complete idiot, I was sure she knew who I was!

"E-Edward?" She replied, in a whisper softer than mine, "No, it can't be." She shook her head in frustration, tears splashed from her eyes and ran down her cheeks, "You need to stop this!" She told herself.

Stop what? What was going on with her?

"Bella?" Was all I could say. Nothing else escaped my lips but her name. "Bella," I continued, with my dumbfounded expression. Finally, the realisation hit, here she was, right in front of me, arms length away. All I wanted to do was to wrap my arms around her, just hold her for the rest of eternity, make sure she was really there, but for some reason, my arms would move forward to reach for her, my mouth wouldn't speak anything other than her name.

"Go away!" She whispered angrily, banging her fist against her head, "I promised myself I wouldn't let this happen, I promised Jake! No more, I need to move on!"

Move on? What was she talking about? And she had promised herself, Jake? The more she spoke, the more I didn't understand!

"No more hallucinations or whatever this is." She took one sweeping look at me, studying my face, my body, my eyes, before turning away. She looked up at the sky in her moment of obvious insanity.

"Goodbye Edward, I love you, but I can't do this anymore. I need to move on. If I can't be happy then I might as well make the one person who truly deserves it as happy as I can make them. Goodbye Edward, wherever you are." She turned her back, purposely not looking at me and crawled into bed.

What was she talking about? I pulled myself through the open window, and slowly walked to her bed. I stroked her face with my finger, memorising the soft feel of her skin.

"I'm sorry Bella, it was a mistake to come back. I should have guessed you wouldn't want me back after everything that I did to you. I-I don't know what I was thinking."

She had no response for my words. She shut her eyes tighter as her lip trembled faster, tears rolled down her cheeks and her body shook, yet she still did not speak.

My heart ached for this precious mortal being. My beautiful Bella. That short, single year I had spent with my love was the sunniest time of my eternity. When I left her my world turned black, my heart froze further, my brain held captive by the memories of the past. Yet here she was. My sunshine, my bright, bright star. I looked back out of her open window. There was nothing but darkness, the perfect place for me. I was the creature of the dark, the menace of the night, it was time I returned and left my sunshine, my love, my eternity behind.