Chapter 1: Hide

Day 1

Kaylee

Kaylee was trembling as hard as an autumn leaf about to snap off of its twig. River's tinny voice on the radio had put a little bravery back into her stomach, so she was able to untie herself without a wild, animal need to run. That's what she felt now. It was in her stomach, in her heart, everywhere. For whatever reason, her assault had changed something fundamental inside of her so that she was no longer a reasoning woman, but now had become a small, frightened young animal. Where the animal would be darting, her eyes and mind were jumping from thing to thing, never daring to stay in one place for too long.

In case he came back, she thought with a shudder.

It didn't help that she could feel a trail of blood leaking from inside of her, running down her leg, hidden by her coveralls. It was a reminder of what he could do and what he would do. Kaylee had never been raped before today, so she had no idea that how brutal Early really had been with her. Since she also spent little time with women who weren't mercenaries, she had nothing at all to compare this to. Her utter lack of experience was leaving out the important information that when he came back, he could do so much worse to her.

With baited breath, Kaylee silently slid open the doors of the engine room. There he was, up on the bridge like he owned Serenity, talking to someone. It looked like Simon from here, but she couldn't be sure. Actually, she didn't want to be sure. She didn't want her Simon in any kind of danger, especially the kind of danger that was dealt from a cold-blooded rapist. Kaylee's fingers turned white from holding on to the door frame for such a long time. Then she remembered what she had to do. What River had told her to do.

With a screaming warning inside of her head, for she had pressed her lips firmly together, Kaylee slipped out into the hall. She froze for a moment, eyes growing as wide as saucers when she thought that she saw the bounty hunter turn so that he could see her battered body and even more battered psyche. He made no indication that this was the case and Kaylee exhaled softly. She looked up at the locking device on the wall. In a matter of moments, she figured out what he had done and undid it, watching the lights go off as the bunks were unlocked.

Kaylee swallowed hard and fought the urge to run to one of the men, the captain or Jayne or Wash, to protect her from him. She knew it was a stupid idea, though, the kind that got people hurt or maybe even killed. So, she stared in longing at the open bunks, filled with her friends and her protectors on Serenity and had to make the decision to stay away. Something about it made her feel sick to her stomach, but that could've been the beating she had taken, and Kaylee decided to run away. She needed to get the hell away from the bounty hunter, no matter what she did.

So, on softly padded feet, she raced through the ship, quick as her body would take her, down into the cargo bay. She stayed down there, breathing harder than a run that distance would normally tax her and felt that her legs starting to turn into jelly. Her body was simply in no shape to be running anywhere, especially across the lengths of Serenity.

A burning flash of fear raced across her field of vision. He would come down here and find her, she suddenly knew. He would come down to the cargo bay after killing the captain, maybe he locked them in to gas them, and would celebrate his little plan gone almost perfectly by hurting her again. He would force her to do all manner of disgusting, degrading, and painful things for escaping and attempting freeing the captain and the rest of the crew. If she was lucky, he'd leave her on Serenity with her dead crew, it she was unlucky, he'd drag Kaylee along with River to the core, using Kaylee whenever he felt like it or until she was no longer of any use to him.

Kaylee forced her body to run over to Mal's favorite smuggling spot. She pushed the paneling to the side and slipped inside the dark space. It took twice as long to drag the paneling back in place from the inside, but she managed it. The thought of his hands on her body made her manage it. She swallowed again and again, backed up and hit her head on the low ceiling. Kaylee sank down hard and gasped. Then she let go.

Falling onto her side, the little mechanic began to weep miserably, pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes as she did. Everything ached or hurt in some way. She could die in this little prison and it would be all right. At least, it would take the pain and humiliation away. Right now, both were threatening to overcome her and she had no clue how to cope with either. She had been shot once, but everything had happened so quickly that she barely remembered any pain at all. As for humiliation this deep? No. No, she had never experienced anything like this before.

I've never been raped before.

Kaylee wiped her cheek with the back of her hand, only noticing that it made her skin slick and wet, not the sheer amount of tears she had already cried. She slid backwards until her back was once more pressed up against metal. But, this was not a protesting Serenity, screaming at the violation of her beloved little mechanic. This was a protecting Serenity, one that was sheltering that mechanic whom she could now help.

Kaylee patted the wall and closed her eyes. River had the right idea, becoming one with Serenity, that is. It was too bad that Kaylee thought herself too stupid to know how to do so. She only knew how to touch Serenity in ways that would make her fly true; she didn't know how to escape into her beloved ship.

As time passed, the young woman slipped in and out of the daze that the darkness, her tears and exhaustion, and her injuries were putting her into. She used one arm as a pillow of sorts, while the other's hand was pushed down Kaylee's coveralls, trying to stopper the bleeding that was taking place between her legs. She felt sure that she was bleeding to death ever so slowly.

Gradually, exhaustion took over and Kaylee found herself slipping deeper and deeper into her dozing state. The relief of sleep was welcome and the mechanic let herself succumb to it.

River

"Thank God, River!" Simon gasped, his face white as a sheet. He looked pain, harrowed, and completely exhausted. River touched his cheek and he closed his eyes, leaning into her touch. River quickly wrapped her arms around her older brother and held him close to her body. He had a bullet in his thigh because of her. She pulled back slightly after a few needed moments of closeness.

"Are you all right?" she asked softly, bending to examine his wound. Her fingers grazed over it gentle and Simon whimpered. River looked up at him quickly and Simon was staring back at her in disbelief.

"You just tricked your way out of becoming someone's bounty and you want to know if I'm OK?" he asked and she smiled. Sweet Simon. He was truly the more altruistic of the Tam children. He had always been the giver and the one who did the watching while River's imagination and sharp wit made her the take and the doer. Ever since rescuing her from the clutches of the "school" where River had been held hostage, Simon had taken on the role of the doer as well, frantically doing whatever it took to keep his little sister safe. River stroked her fingers through her brother's thick hair.

"I'm fine. I had fun," she told him, though that wasn't exactly the case. True, it had been fun to torture Early in ways that he didn't quite understand, especially after what he had done to Kaylee, but facing up to the fact that it was a reality that nobody wanted her on Serenity, at least on a epidermal level, was painful.

River looked around the room. Mal, Zoe, Wash, Simon, and her. No Kaylee. "Where's Kaylee?" she asked aloud. Mal and Wash exchanged looks.

"In the engine room," Wash suggested.

River shook her head. "No, he hurt Kaylee," she said, breaking the news as she stood, leaving Simon's side. "He really hurt her."

Mal swore. "Where is she, River?"

"That's what I asked you," River said, feeling panic well up inside of her. Why did everyone else always have to be in charge? Couldn't they let her lead them to where Kaylee was? She'd find faster than anyone else on this ship, she knew. Then River stopped moving and closed her eyes as the adults in the room quickly made up plans to search for Kaylee on Serenity. River would just feel her way to her friend, like she always did. Of course, that would require calm and patience. She opened her eyes and glanced down to Simon.

"I have to find Kaylee," she told him. He nodded.

"Then find a way to bring her back to me," he said, his voice tight with an emotion River didn't quite understand. Maybe once she was in love she would. "If she's hurt-"

"I'll protect her," River promised.

She walked away from the infirmary where Zoe and Book were helping her brother up onto the table to extract the bullet from his leg. He had been so brave, diving into Jubal Early like that, going mad with the idea of losing his baby sister. She wished that she could've told him her secret, very nuanced plan. Instead, she had to whisper him to quiet after he was beaten down by Early and struggling desperately to keep her safe.

Kaylee wasn't far away, River knew. Did it really take a physic to know that she was hurting and scared? River shook her head and followed the garbled stream of consciousness that was making up Kaylee now. Normally, it was easy to find her, hers was the brightest and most light-infused of the auras on this ship, but now she was just as muddy as the captain on one of his worst days. Still, River kept walking towards her friend, fear mixing into her blood stream with each footstep that she took.

Eventually, she found herself on the floor of the cargo bay and it became clear to her where Kaylee was. She knelt down in front of Mal's favorite smuggling compartment.

"Kaylee?" she asked softly. She placed her fingers on the metal standing between the two friends. She had the sudden desire to be able to simply will away things she didn't want there or like. Then Early would have never have hurt Kaylee and Kaylee would not be hiding from her.

She was answered by a hiccough and a fresh bout of sobbing. Instantly, River pulled back the panel and looked deep inside. Kaylee's half-lidded eyes stared back at her and, if possible, the little mechanic shrunk away. River held out her hand.

"He's gone, mei mei," River promised. "Can you move?"

"Not comin' out," Kaylee mumbled and hid her face behind her arm. River nodded then slid fast into the hiding place. "River, what are ya doin'?"

"I'm not going to let you wait alone for Mal to find you," she promised, dragging the paneling back into place.

"I don't want you here," Kaylee replied weakly.

"You want to be alone, I know," River replied. The pain in Kaylee's mind was almost too much for her to stand. She struggled hard to force it away from her own self, feeling guilty that she could do it, but that poor Kaylee had to keep all the suffering to herself. "But, you're going to bleed too much if I leave you alone. They won't find you in time."

"Maybe that's all right."

"And maybe it's not."

They waited in silence for a period before Kaylee whined uncomfortably and pushed at River.

"You're scared of the dark, River."

And, she was. But, she was more scared of leaving her sick and injured friend alone in this dark, hidden place while she ran for help. Kaylee could very well find an even better place to hide and could hurt herself even worse in trying to get there. So, River did the only thing she could do: she closed her eyes and wrapped one arm around her friend. She'd make sure that they'd find Kaylee fast enough to get her some good, real help.