Title: Far Away

Pairing: Sam Winchester x Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester x Castiel

Rating: T+

Format key: Plain text – present text, Italic text – flashback.

Info: Dean is so sick of Castiel disappearing when he asks the angel important questions. So he gives Cas a choice... answer the question or risk losing him for the rest of his life.

Link to video: www. Youtube .com/watch?v=hm7VAMhiVvw

Our lights bounced off of the walls, casting an eerie glow over the wreckage of the building. "Cas!?" I heard Sam shout. "Castiel?" I was too panicked, too choked, to call anything out myself. I led the way into the messy knot of fallen building and my light shone on...

My legs moved faster, and my heart felt like it was about to implode on me. "Cas..." My hands ran over his arms, trying to get him up, to get him moving. He sat up, startled, and helped me pull him to his feet. "Come on, we've got to go." I coaxed as sparks rained over us from the lights that had left torn wires above. I looked at him, trying to make sure he was alright.

-x-

"I hardly know what I'm doing right now." His voice was lost, confused.

"I'm pretty sure I just saved your life." I replied, trying to be serious and funny at the same time.

"Why?"

"Because I told you... I love you."

"How do I know that you won't pick Sam again?" His voice was guarded now, sick of being hurt.

"I have told you so many times now. Please tell me that you can feel it too, and I'm not just going crazy!"

Castiel looked away from me and up at the roof, taking a deep breath. "Dean, I don't know what on earth is going on anymore. I'm an angel. I'm not supposed to feel. And all of these... feelings for you keep popping into my life and..." He stared at me for a moment and I bit my tongue so he'd keep going. And then he was gone.

Damn I hate it when he does that.

-x-

"I don't know anything." His voice was so strong and Sam looked so... displeased.

"Cas, do you want to be with me?" I asked with my brows raised. I felt sad that I had to do this to Sam, and yet relieved that it may finally just be over. Castiel simply turned his gaze to me, unsure of what to say.

"Just tell me already." Sam replied, his voice gruff with the threat of tears. "I don't want to keep making you two miserable." Such a Sam thing to say... I knew the kid was lying through his teeth.

"I know you're lying Sam. But Castiel, you've got to choose." Still he stared like a deer caught in headlights.

And he was gone.

-x-

The memories seemed to seep into my dreams... memories of us talking, of the cute things he said to me. And I jolted awake again, sitting up and looking around. There he was, leaning against the counter across the room. I got up and wandered over to him, wiping the sleep from my eyes.

"You know that I love you." He said, staring right into my eyes. I nodded. I licked my dry lips.

"Yeah. But that doesn't answer the question." My voice was somewhat heavy with sleep. "Do you want to be with me?" He looked down to the floor. I took a few steps towards him. "Castiel, why won't you answer the question? Why's it so hard to tell me?" He stared at me. "I'm asking you Cas."

Standing on the firm, solid Earth for the first time in what felt like forty years, and I was unsure how this even happened.

"I'm asking you because I don't want to push you into it. I don't want to make you do anything... just answer the question. Because it's going to mean a big lifestyle change for Sam and I. And for you. And if you don't want to, please just tell me." I knew that Uriel and Sam were watching, that I was making this a bigger deal than it had to be.

"Don't say it-" Uriel

"Back off." Castiel snapped to the other angel.

And they were gone.

"DAMMIT!" I snapped, stomping my foot. Sam just heaved a heavy sigh.

-x-

We were sitting in the park again, and I took a deep breath and broke the silence between us. "I'm tired of you avoiding my question and disappearing every chance you get."

"Sorry."

"I just want you to know that I want you in my life."

"I know you do. And... I'm sorry I take off like that."

"Then why do you do it?"

"I don't know what to say."

"You could always tell the truth." I said simply.

"I know that you're hurt," He paused, "Because I won't tell you. But sometimes things aren't that easy to say when the person who loves you most and the person that hates you most are staring at you and you get to choose the outcome."

I wanted to tell Castiel about all the times that Sam cried over this situation, all the times I had cried about it, how many times I had ripped the Bible from its drawer in the hotel rooms and begged for him to come and see me so I didn't have to deal with the pain anymore.

-x-

"I want you to tell me. That's what I want and you know it!" My voice was hurt and pleading and there was nothing more that I wanted than for him to turn around and just say the damn words. I grabbed his shoulder and spun him to face me. "You know I love you, dammit, and that I want to be with you, so why the hell can't you say it back to me!?"

"Dean, you know-"

"Knowing isn't the same as hearing it, Castiel! So, please, tell me now, or I'm going to have to just... go." My eyes wanted to cry, and yet I held the tears in. I had to show Cas that I could be strong. "And if you and me to go, just say the word." He was silent. "I'm so sick of you never saying anything that comes anywhere close to answering what I want to hear most."

"When I first met you, I thought you were a person, just someone else that I had to work with. Now I know you're more than that. You're a pain in the ass." Cas was speaking quietly, but I could hear him.

"Yeah." I took a few steps closer, and stared at him. "What are you saying? That it matters that I'm a pain in your ass?"

"Yes." Was his reply, and I began to walk away. "But I didn't say that I didn't want you." His voice called after me. "Quite the opposite."

"What was that?" I asked, holding back tears.

"I said... I want you to be with me," He replied, and the sound of a smile laced his voice, "Despite the fact that you're a pain in my ass."

"You're sure about that?"

"More than anything." I turned to face him and he was looking at the ground. "I know that I've been avoiding telling you, because I just... I didn't want to screw up your life. Dating angels can do that. And... I didn't want to tell you anything until I knew that I was sure and that you were sure and... that I could protect you. And now... now I have the confidence to tell you that I love you, and I want to be in your life." He murmured as we stood face to face.

I had heard what I wanted to say, and relief fluttered through me.