AN: It was too good of a storyline to pass up. It's totally not my fault.
"He What?" Temari spluttered, half choking on her tea.
"Congrats, Sis" Kankurou snickered. The tea cup slammed into the table cracking and Temari promptly whalloped him, sending him flying with her oversized fan.
"This has to be a mistake" Temari spat, eyeing the signature and the paperwork as Gaara shifted his sand back and forth. "Surely it's a fake? There's no way possible that he would agree to something so backwards" Temari scowled, brow furrowed.
"Maybe his counsel is forcing him, like ours is you" Kankurou replied with a shrug.
Gaara's green eye twitched.
"Sorry, Kazekage sama" Kankurou said, scratching the back of his head as he winced. Gaara nodded.
"I'd like to think that Temari is doing this for her country" Gaara replied briskly.
"I banked on the fact that he would refuse. Ugh!" Temari scowled.
"Guess you'll be a blushing bride after all?" Kankurou grinned.
"Kankurou" Gaara warned, but it was too late. Temari proceeded to pummel her brother in true sisterly fashion. Gaara sighed.
………………………………………
Temari cracked her knuckles as she walked around Sand cooling off after a much deserved pummeling of one puppet master brother. It hit her immediately that this would be one of the last times she was in her home. She would be expected to live in Konoha. Temari fought the tears. Ninja didn't have emotion. But…she loved Suna. She loved her students. She had never ever possibly even considered leaving. And now she was being taken from everything she loved and knew. She was being thrown into a completely foreign situation where she would hardly know anyone.
Hell, she wasn't even going to be in the same ecosystem. She thought of the lush green of the fertile fire country and cringed. She didn't even like forests. Much less all of that green scattered everywhere. And it would snow in Konoha. She could count on her hands how often she'd had missions in snow. Now she would be living in it? Suna didn't really have the changing of seasons, but she loved that about her country. It was consistent and dependable.
Depressed, she continued to wander the streets of Suna. She would miss the shape of the buildings, the sand dunes in the background. She would miss the spectacular sunsets with purple and blue and orange colors colliding. Hell she'd miss the sun because it would be cold there in Konoha.
She watched the small children play in the streets. Temari would miss the people. She caught the eye of a man in a tunic and burnoose. His eye motioned to the ally and Temari quirked an eyebrow. Everyone in Suna knew who she was… and she knew practically everyone in Suna. So who was this person? Burnoose and tunics were common place outside of the city simply because of the sandstorms, but he was inside the city. Temari decided to find out. She was an elite jounin after all. She could take care of herself in the case of emergency and being the kazekage's sister did draw quite a bit of attention so it wasn't as if she'd get dragged off successfully.
"Who are you?" She asked as she settled into the alleyway her fan out and in her hands just in case.
"Someone concerned about Suna" The man in the burnoose replied. He was tan, well built, and carried himself like a shinobi.
He looked familiar but she couldn't place the face with the name mostly because she couldn't see this mans face. She couldn't feel his chakra, because he was cloaking it but he was using a second rate cloak so he wasn't as skilled as she was which was a relief.
"I need a face" She replied.
The man let down his burnoose. It was Matsu. Temari had known Matsu as a semi respectable shinobi, though a bit chauvinistic. Mastu was deeply concerned with what went on with Suna, particularly with leaf. Temari weighed that information against what she would hear; her own grain of salt. Matsu hadn't been in the village for a while as he'd been on a long term mission for a year.
"Matsu" Temari replied, waiting as she crossed her arms.
"I've been on a mission for a year. My team discovered some interesting developments while we were gone. There's something you need to know, Temari san."
"And that is?" Temari asked skeptically.
"Leaf lied. Kabuto lives." Matsu replied.
"W-what?" Temari practically hissed.
Matsu pulled out a small satchel and grabbed the single grey… thread? within the pouch.
"This is a hair from his head. As your brother is the famous Kankurou, I know you can tell whether this is from a live body or a dead one. Two of my men died to get this, Temari san." Matsu replied, deathly serious.
"And why are you telling me this? Kazekage sama needs to know at once-" Temari snapped getting ready to turn.
Matsu grabbed her arm and Temari tensed, ready to strike. Matsu released the hold on her arm backing up.
"Sorry.." He offered.
Temari paused, waiting.
"Temari san…Gaara is…blinded by his sympathies for Leaf. If he found out something this…devastating, it could mean war." Matsu replied.
"You're damn right it means war and m-MMPH" Matsu covered her lips with his hand, scowling as he pulled her back into the alleyway.
"Hush! This is a shinobi village!" He scowled, glancing around. "I don't think the Kazekage needs to know about it just yet. We need to figure out why leaf lied about such important information. We don't have enough hard data to confirm this."
"You have the hair, what else do you need?" Temari glowered.
"Dna. Data. Motive. Paperwork confirming it. Essentially Hard Proof, that he's alive and an explanation for why leaf lied." Matsu replied.
"So what are you suggesting?" Temari asked, hesitant.
"You are going to be married to the Rokudaime." Matsu retorted.
"And how do you know about that?" Temari's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"The council members are preparing the feasts and celebrations as we speak" Matsu rolled his eyes. Temari scowled. They were assuming this was all going to go through? Ugh. Temari had bigger problems then the wedding though if this was true.
"You want me to spy on them?" Temari concluded. Matsu nodded.
Temari shut her eyes. She had done covert operations where she was a double agent, but nothing this extreme. If she was caught by leaf nin, even being the Hokage's wife would not spare her from execution. But if leaf had lied about Kabuto being alive then that could devastate relationships between them. Temari frowned.
"Alright." She agreed. "I will find out more about this situation."
"Move the wedding up" Matsu suggested.
"What?" Temari snapped.
"Move it up. Keep the leaf occupied with wedding details and getting their country ready for your arrival. You will have a better chance of success if they are distracted" Matsu replied.
What he said made sense. Too much sense. Matsu was a good ninja, she had known him for most of her life. The man was loyal from what she had known about him a year ago. Time, as she knew, could change anyone. Temari wouldn't just be spying on Konoha. Perhaps she could gage Matsu's loyalty and figure out which groups had discovered such costly information in case they were traitors. He was questionable at best, but Temari would find out the truth for herself. For now, she would let him think that he was calling the shots.
Temari nodded. "I'll tell Gaara about the wedding plans immediately and set off for Konoha as soon as possible. Matsu…assemble a list of 'escorts' for me." Temari said with meaning.
Matsu nodded. "Of course, Temari himei"
"Don't call me that" Temari snapped hating that title as she took off.
Matsu grinned and pulled his burnoose up walking out of the alleyway whistling.
……………………………………………
"2 WEEKS?" Ino screeched.
Naruto winced. How she managed to make her voice sound like nails on a chalkboard, he would never know, but he did know that it was damn effective at cowing him.
"That's what the paperwork says, Ino…" Naruto replied meekly.
"AHG!" Ino cried, throwing her almighty notebook organizer into the door with chakra enhanced fury.
Naruto winced as the notebook rebounded and hit the floor taking a piece of the door with it. She'd taken a good chunk out of his office door without it being a ninja weapon. If Naruto wasn't so terrified of her anger he might have been impressed.
"Do you know what this *MEANS*?" She snarled slamming her fists down on Naruto's desk.
Naruto flinched. He was grateful Ino didn't have Sakura's monstrous chakra enhanced strength or she might have leveled the kage tower with that blow.
"No?" He replied, wondering if that was the appropriate response. Her screeching tone told him it wasn't.
"IT means that I have to come up with a way to plan a *kage* level wedding in a matter of TWO WEEKS" She snarled, blue eyes blazing.
"Uh… at least you know a florist?.....ehehe.." Naruto said scratching his head.
"RAAAAHHGGGG!" Ino snarled, whipping out her kunai and slamming it into his desk. Naruto winced.
He hadn't seen Ino this angry since Genma had broken up with her.
"You will get me Sakura, Hinata, Ten ten, and any other capable female who will be married that you know in this office, within an hour…do you hear me, Hokage sama?" Ino snarled.
Ino rarely ever used his official title unless she was formal…or pissed. The situation was definitely the latter of the two which meant desperate times called for desperate measures. Naruto nodded and disappeared with kage level ninja poof.
Naruto had the aforementioned Kunoichi summoned, as well as several clerks he figured Ino would need for grunt work, along with his anbu level strategist Nara Shikamaru and Jounin Akimichi Chouji.
"What do you mean it's not possible?" Ino demanded, snarling into the phone. "I'll tell you what's not damn possible, the Ho-Ka-Ge WILL have the desert lilies in his fiance's bouquet for the wedding or-" Ino snarled and then saw Shikamaru. "I'll call you back with specifics."
She hung up the phone and launched herself at her man.
"Shhhhhhiiiiiiikkkkaaaaaaa, I just found out I have to plan a kage level wedding in two weeks" She whined.
Shikamaru tensed. He knew that face, that look of those nearly tearful blue eyes, the pout with the jutted lip. Damn it.
"You'll help me, won't you Shika kun?" She pleaded blinking her long black lashes at him and looking up at him most becomingly.
Chouji sweat-dropped and Naruto grimaced at the scene. "You don't have to do that, Ino I already ordered him to" Naruto replied with a smirk.
Shikamaru shot Naruto the darkest of looks.
"YOSH!" Ino cried, leaping off of him as she went back to the phone.
"Chouji? What are you doing here?" Ino asked. Not that she wasn't happy to see her former teammate, but she was surprised. He had his own team to be training.
"My family knows a caterer" He replied with a shrug.
"PERFECT!" Ino grinned. Anyone who prepared for an Akimichi feast would be able to do a kage wedding in two weeks.
Shikamaru sighed looking from Chouji to Naruto, to his wife.
"This is beyond troublesome" He groaned, looking at Ino's three folders of wedding planning details as he began sorting through it.
"Oye! What are the others for?" Ino asked.
"The clerks are for grunt work" Naruto replied.
"And where are the girls?" Ino asked, eyebrow arching. Naruto flinched, hands up in surrender.
"I summoned them. The soonest Sakura could get out was three o'clock. Tsunade is going to cover for her at the hospital, but TenTen, Shizune, Hinata, and Moegi should be arriving within the hour" Naruto replied.
"You're the best Naruto!" Ino squealed as she hung up the number she was dialing.
"You" she pointed, eyes narrowed. "Start dialing this number for the wedding cake. You get started on the formal gear for the groomsmen. Naruto get me a list of groomsmen, Now." She ordered, and the clerks got to work.
Naruto sighed and had a seat as his desk, finishing the list of groomsmen quickly.
"At least you're in the wedding, 'Maru" Naruto grinned.
"You're making me get dressed up and stand in front of thousands of people in a ceremony for hours? Joyous. Man this is such a pain in the ass" Shikamaru scowled, shaking his head as he began to sort through his wife's plans, forming his own as he began setting up files for delegating.
Naruto sweated as he supervised the process and twiddled his thumbs. Between Ino and Shikamaru, they were able to come up with a list of things to delegate. Shikamaru went to go inform anbu ops of their new mission assignments. Ino kept the clerks busy and by the end of the day they had accomplished a great deal. Naruto sighed and filled out the paperwork.
"Temari should arrive with her company by Friday?" Naruto said as he eyed the paperwork in front of him.
"We already have anbu sweeping the guest quarters, Hokage sama" Ino replied, returning to her three folders for the wedding and checking notes. "You, start writing what I dictate" She said to the nearest clerk who wasn't already scribbling and writing furiously.
"Ino, you're going to give them carpal tunal" Naruto said, eyeing them.
"When Sakura gets here, she can put her medical skills to work. Oh and while you were in the bathroom, Ten Ten showed up and I gave her the assignments. Ten ten's got the chunins working on construction of the Kage house.
"W-what? What are you doing to my house?" Naruto exclaimed.
"The kage house needed renovation anyways, and we figured we would make it less like a bachelor pad and more like a home." Ino said with a shrug.
Naruto groaned. "It was fine. Do I even get a say in the renovations?" Naruto grimaced.
"Nope. I already cleared the floor plans." Ino replied.
"Ino…" Naruto growled.
"You want your home to look splendid to welcome your newest bride, don't you?" Ino replied jabbing him with a finger in the chest.
"Yea…but-" Naruto protested.
"Most of the remodeling is to make it a bit more like the houses in Suna. We want our Kage's wife to feel comfortable in her new home." Ino replied in a tone that refused arguement.
Naruto sighed.
He had been inside of sands guest housing and so he supposed he could live with it. It was awfully nice. But he hadn't expected everything to happen so…so quickly. He huffed.
"Hokage sama, go home and think about how you're going to greet your bride to be. You need to be dashing." She said, straitening his jacket and she gave him a gentle push out the door.
"I am dashing" Naruto retorted with a frown.
"You are also an unpredictable, disorganized, klutz. You need to be formal when addressing Temari particularly in front of the Kazekage's entourage and the rest of the assembled Konoha nin." Ino looked up to see Naruto flustered and pale.
"Never mind…I should probably get you a script that you can memorize by Friday. Damn where's Shika when I need him?" Ino scowled.
Naruto sighed. "Ino…"
Ino sighed and sat down, resting since she'd been on her feet for the past 5 hours.
"Naruto, you simply will have to shape up now that you're going to be a married man." Ino retorted, raking a hand through her pale blonde bangs.
"I don't even know what to shape…I know next to nothing about her" Naruto scowled, irritated.
"Naruto.." Ino frowned.
"Never mind. I'll come up with something on my own. The first time I'm greeting her will be in front of an assembly?" Naruto asked swallowing again.
Ino nodded, biting her lip.
"Great, so I'll have people watching me make an idiot of myself. Fantastic" Naruto grumbled.
"Naruto…There's some formality to it, yeah, but if you be yourself she'll learn to love you, as you'll learn to love her. You did become the kage for pete sakes like you told us all you would for years. As long as you show the same dedication and hard work to your marriage, it will work out." Ino insisted.
"That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me in my entire life, Ino" Naruto sniffled.
"Karma's a very motivating factor. Now Scat!" Ino said, pushing him out of the office.