Chapter Nine

"Spike, whatever you are about to say, just forget it," Buffy stated.

"What? Are you mad at me?" Spike questioned moving closer to her.

"No, I'm happy. I'm really happy right now, and whenever you speak, you tend to ruin my happy time and I really don't appreciate that. Nor do I need it right now. Please leave," she replied pushing him back out the door.

"I'm sorry, but--"

"No! I don't wanna hear it. Really. You don't have to say anything."

"Would you stop being daft and just bloody listen to me?" he said grabbing her arms and shaking her.

"What?"

"I need to talk to you."

"So you said."

"Give me a second."

"Come on, out with it Spike. I don't have time to sit here and--"

"Oh, for the love of God! Just shut up one second, woman and let me get this out!"

"Get what out?"

"Gaaaaaaah! You're driving me crazy!"

"That's because you won't just come out with it."

"No, you don't get it. That's what I came here to say."

"What?"

"You're driving me insane."

"Spike, you're not making sense."

"I know, just listen."

"I--"

"I can't stop thinking about you."

"Spike you're--huh?"

"Buffy, I think I'm falling in love with you."

"You think you're, what?!"

"I said, I'm in love with you, Buffy."

"No, Spike. Don't do this," she pleaded turning away from him.

He spun her around to face him.

"Buffy, listen to me. You're all I bloody think about. I've never felt this way about anyone. This means something."

"Yeah, it means you're out of your mind!"

"I love you."

"No you don't."

She pushed him away again.

"Spike. I'm marrying Angel."

"I know, but if you could just--"

"Next week," she whispered with tears gleaming in her eyes.

"Next week? You can't be serious. You really think you're ready for that?"

"How the hell would you know what I'm ready for? You don't know me."

Angry tears were now pouring down her face.

"I know Peaches isn't the one for you. I've known that all along. He would never be able to make you feel--"

"You know what, Spike? It's none of your business what Angel makes me feel like. I love him and that's all I need to know.

"But, Buffy--"

"Get out of my apartment, Spike."

"I--"

"Get out of here!"

And then he was gone. Buffy didn't know how long she sat on the sofa crying. She didn't even know why she was crying in the first place. Why did she let Spike get to her that way, anyway? Surely, she was stronger than this. But the truth was, Spike always made her feel like this. He seemed to always know what her doubts were and how to use them to confuse and anger her. Sometimes he didn't seem to get her at all and other times, it was like he could see right through her. His words were stuck in her mind. He said he loved her. Was he just trying to mess up her relationship with Angel? Because if he was, that was a horribly mean way to attempt it. Then came the question she was dreading. How did she really feel about him? Sure, she acted like she hated him, told him to leave her alone, and finally kicked him out of her apartment, but her doubts about marrying Angel were surfacing again and she was getting more and more angry by the second. How dare he come over and say all that. He had no right to tell her he loved her now when she was about to marry his brother. It was ridiculous and she was going to tell him. She put on her coat and rushed outside with one purpose. She knew exactly what she had to do. She was going to find Spike and tell him to leave her alone. She was going to tell him she hated him. She was going to tell him he was an idiot and had no right to admit any feelings for her whatsoever.

The cab reached Spike's apartment only a few minutes later. Buffy rushed up the steps that led to it and banged on the door angrily.

"Spike?"

"Spike?!"

The door opened and he stood there wearing a towel. Apparently, he had just gotten out of the shower. His hair was a mess of bleached curls, his eyes intensely focused on her with obvious confusion. They seemed to have turned a darker shade of blue. Small droplets of water glided down his naked chest.

"Oh…oh my. I've obviously come at a bad time, so I think I'll just--yeah--gonna go," Buffy said rather stunned and embarrassed.

"Buffy?" What--"

And suddenly, it was like someone else had taken over her body. She moved quickly. Her hands wrapped around his neck and she brought his lips down to hers in a hard, passionate, earth-shattering kiss.