I hope you guys don't mind the POV change. I didn't want to make Ranger come off as heartless and it seemed the best way to do it was to get a look at what he's thinking

Ranger's POV

I watched the tear make its way down her face and settle on her once-again stung lip. I brushed it away with my thumb and it was so reminiscent of that day two weeks ago, when I brushed the honey off her mouth, that I was half tempted to slip my thumb into my mouth again.

I had hoped never to see this look on her face. It wrenched my heart to think that I was the cause of her tears so I convinced myself they were the product of the bee sting.

I had been keeping my distance these last couple weeks and I knew from watching her GPS every free second that she had been spending a lot of time with Morelli. They had gone out eight or nine times to various places. Some of the venues they went to were real dives but I could almost follow the line of progression. If things kept up the way they were going he would be down on one knee at Rossini's by the end of the month.

How fucking ordinary. Stephanie is no ordinary woman and proposing to her in some blase` Italian restaurant is almost as bad as proposing on a Jumbo-Tron at a basketball game. She deserved so much more, so much better.

I imagined what it would be like to have the luxury of a normal life. I was no fan of Morelli's but thinking about his botched attempt at romancing Stephanie I once again found myself jealous of his position.

I could do right by Stephanie because I understood her in a way that He never could. I would take her to my home, knowing that it would soon be our home, where she would find hundreds of candles burning just for her. She would find a note that would read, "Each one of these flames represents something I love about you."

Strewn around the candle-lit room would be a thousand notes, not just from me, but from her mom, her dad, her grandma, Connie, Lula and all the guys at Rangeman. She makes it impossible not to love her and everyone who does would want to tell her why.

A thousand notes seems like a lot but as I would sit down to write them I would find myself unable to stop. I would build a chest for her to keep the notes in and look back on whenever she wished. I'm a pretty decent carpenter, one of the things Steph has yet to learn about me. There's still so much I want to learn about her and if I had things my way we would spend from someday to forever teaching and learning from each other.

As she makes her way room to room collecting notes, I would follow close behind watching her with wonder. She is always so responsive to and so affected by everything around her. She has such a zest for life, just one more thing to love about her.

When she finally makes her way to the bedroom she'd find her favorite book, a first edition copy of Jane Austen's Emma set on the pillows. She would pick it up and on the inside cover she would find her name imprinted in gold script, Stephanie Michelle Plum Manoso. I would take her hand in mine and ask her to spend the rest of her life with me. Ask? Hell, I'd beg if that's what it took and if I was lucky enough she'd say yes.

I shook myself out of imagination land to find her hand sandwiched in mine and her looking at me like I had sprouted a second head. How long had I been daydreaming?

"Ranger. I don't know what kind of game you're playing but I'm pretty sick of your shit."

Imagination land-Stephanie was much more polite but I guessed I deserved it after how I've treated her these last couple weeks.

You couldn't actually say I treated her like anything at all though, since what I'd basically done was ignore her all together. I had stopped going by her desk and I hadn't met with her in the gym at all. I hadn't so much as touched her since the bond's office and now, with her so close and the warmth of her hand in mine I found myself wanting to close the distance between us, back her against the wall and show her just how much I missed her.

But that would undo all the progress I'd made. I knew what I had to do and I knew why but that certainly didn't mean I wanted to do it.

As much as I imagined the house and the candles and her "yes." I had to keep reminding myself about my talk with Morelli and just how right he was. The life he would give her wouldn't be as great a fit as a life with me would be, and it might be boring as fuck, but she would be safe. Or at least as safe as any life with Stephanie's luck could be.

I still hadn't spoken, but instead just looked down at her while I brushed my thumb over her hand. I could hear her breathing quicken at our closeness, which caused my own heart to speed and my dick to twitch. I quickly let go of her hand and took a step back, trying to reign in my quickly-slipping self restraint.

She looked a little shocked at my sudden departure and finally I spoke up. I said the exact opposite of what my heart was telling me to say, "I'm going into the wind at the end of the week and I don't know how long I'll be gone. It's a very dangerous mission and I may not come back at all. You're a good friend, Stephanie but I've gotten the feeling lately that you want more. I just wanted to clear this up in case some lines have been blurred. My life isn't going to change. Not for you or anyone else. I care about you a great deal, which is why only think it's fair to remind you not to chase after impossibilities. You need to start thinking more seriously about settling down and starting a family. And Morelli...he loves you."

I turned away from her then, not wanting to see the tears in her eyes or for her to see the same in my own. I was going soft but that wasn't the worst of it. I had just thrown Morelli's words to me back at her. I was quoting the douche-bag and sealing my own sentence. "It had to be done", was the mantra I spoke to myself. I realized that this little speech of mine was probably the longest string of full sentences I had ever spoken to her. Instead of ever telling her the million things I wanted to I was forced to spout off lies and tell her only short, abbreviated versions of the truth.

"It had to be done","It had to be done","It had to be done"...

But I couldn't do it. I turned around to tell her that it was all a lie. I turned around to scoop her up, dry her tears and tell her I loved her, and to fuck them all, I'm taking my someday. But by the time I gathered myself and turned toward her I found myself alone in the empty hallway.

I saw the bee, lying peacefully by my feet. He had known what he wanted and gone for it no matter the cost. Lucky bastard.

A/N: Damned if I can't keep Ranger from being angsty. I don't know what my deal is. What do you guys think? Is it too OOC? I'd love for y'all to R&R and let me know :)