Author's note: ok so this chapter was very hard for me to figure out how to just finish, mostly because I'm in a rush for the next chapter. Thank you so much for all of your reviews. The past chapter didn't do as well as the other two so I'm hoping this does better? Please remember to review. So the first part of this is for Laura, because I think she'll like the RL mentions, Eliz because with your convincing I'm posting it. And Lauren… you're just my partner in crime when it comes to this story. Special dedicate though to Katie, if I could write CB to improve your day I would but I'm afraid I'd screw that one up. The song is Don't speak Liar by We The Kings

Just sit back
And tell me
I'm a liar for this
Don't roll your eyes
Rewind
This happens
Way too many times

The warm breeze blew in the late June air as a blonde stood on the shore line out back in the private beach of her parent's beach house. Or better her mother's beach house, her father had passed away two months previous now to cancer. Her grey eyes were set on the horizon deep in thought of the results she'd gotten only an hour previous. The breeze blew her tie tied summer dress and her hair back from her face as she lifted her cigarette to her lips and took another long drag from it holding in the smoke for a better feeling from it. She needed to take a car up to the city, her boyfriend's band had a gig at a local bar and she wanted to head up there for the night. Her mother wasn't going to care, she was out with her friends for bingo night again. It seemed like since her father passed away Cecilia didn't care what her daughter did.

Lifting up her camera that she held in one hand she snapped a shot of the falling sun, everything looked so beautiful at night. So scene and peaceful, after four wine coolers it was the way she felt also. Dropping the camera back down on the string around her neck she turned around and raced back to the table, letting the cigarette go in the sand along the way. It was nice to never care about anything and always have everything handed to her on a silver platter. That's the way she'd always gotten things and it's the way she always planned on getting things.

Picking up the bottle of wine she took a swing and tossed it back onto the table like it was water. She hadn't even noticed her mother standing in the doorway tapping her fingers on the door.

"Lillian Elizabeth Rhodes what are you thinking?"

The first words out of Cecilia's mouth put a goofy grin on Lily's face as she twirled around on her feet and faced her mother.

"Not being a hypocritical bitch mother."

Lily responded simply as she began to lit another cigarette until Ceecee came closer to her and ripped it out of her hand stubbing it out in the crystal ashtray before slapping Lily across the face.

"I can't believe I allowed my daughter to turn into such a whore"

Her thick bitter voice barked out as with her free hand she slammed the positive pregnancy test down on the table as Lily treated it all with no regard and took another sip of the wine as though the slap had never even happened. Since her father's passing Lily didn't listen to anything Ceecee had to say. She did everything she wasn't supposed to instead.

"that's the way of life isn't it mother. Daddy hadn't been dead for two weeks in you'd already been in how many different guy's beds? At least I know who got me pregnant. And you know what the difference is? I love him. Even if he doesn't have a ton of money I don't give a fuck."

Lily hollered out earning herself another slap, this time she knew the eye was going to bruise. Just one more time she'd have to make excuses for the things she couldn't account for. All she could think of was Rufus, could the two seventeen year olds really have and raise a baby together.

"That low class, low rent street boy won't support you a dime. And without your inheritance you'll have nothing anymore. The three of you will be just like the rest of the street rats that walk the Bronx because I'm surly not going to support you or a bastard child."

She froze suddenly, Lily didn't know how to live without money or people waiting on her hand and foot. She'd been daddy's little girl and he'd given her all the time and everything else in the world that he could have. Now that he was gone it left Lily to fend with her mother who still thought the world was strictly black and white.

"You either get rid of it, and that trash of a boyfriend along with that dumb idea to take pictures for the rest of your life or I'll make you wish that you had. You can kiss all of your money goodbye."

Looking at her mother outraged Lily started to shake slightly as she lifted the glass bottle to her mouth again then noticed that it was gone this time.

"My father left me that money."

Interjecting she crossed her arms and stared at Cecilia with a glare in her eyes.

"and my name is now the main one on his account. Any transaction goes through me now."

Lily was defeated as she nodded her head and looked up at her mother. Without her inheritance Lily had nothing. After watching her parents and how they'd both cheated on one another all throughout their marriages she didn't trust love enough to get through it all with Rufus holding her hand.

"Can you set me up the appointment for tomorrow? I'll go tell Rufus it's over."

She wasn't going to cry, she never cried in front of her mother. That would have shown weakness, not something she cared for Cecilia to see.

"Just keep in mind that I fucking hate you."

The words as she said them didn't even faze Cecilia, after all the feeling between the two was almost mutual.

So sit back
And tell me that your
Tired of this
I know
I'll grow up someday
But it's 2am
And I'm too high and dry
And I won't come down to

As Serena listened to the end of her mother's story she could see all the pain and hurt in her eyes, how much she loved Rufus, and just how hard the repercussions of her decisions had truly been. Serena watched as Lily sat ridged and refused to cry while she told about the remnants of her old broken life. Though they may have been very similar people who made very close mistakes, Serena could tell just how different they really were. Her head and her heart both knew that in any case she would have picked Dan and having their baby over money if it were the case. The case regarding this one however was Serena picking Dan's happiness over strapping him down with a baby.

"Mom I'm so sorry"

Serena said as she wiped a tear from her eyes and reached over pulling Lily into a tight hug. There was more expressed in the tight embrace then could have been expressed by both mother and daughter in spoken words. Tears, anger, resentment and pain all seemed to unite between the two. Who would have thought that history so nearly repeated its self.

"Well I can't say I'm thrilled about all of this, But I watch Dan with you. There's not a moment that he's not taking care of you, who knows, they say everything happens for a reason don't they?"

Serena nodded her head as Lily spoke, it was true, there had to be some certin reason that Lily and Rufus hadn't had their happiness right away and Serena was going to take the lesson from it. She knew that she couldn't do what her mother had done.

"Why don't you head to the loft, telling him might make you feel better."

The thought made Serena freeze and shake her head right away, sure, the baby was his and all but there was no way she was about to tell him any of it, this was her secret for as long as it could be held.

"I um… yea I can't do that. Dan's happy mom. Amanda, she makes him happy and she won't hurt him like I have. I'm not ready to tell him yet."

Shaking her head she grabbed the pillow that had been behind her head and head it close to her torso burying her face into it.

So when I come back
I won't say a word
I know
I've said this before
Don't speak, liar

"Well sweetie, you're gonna have no choice but to tell him eventually. There's a lot more that's gonna grow besides your La Perla tab at Barney's."

Lily's comment made a faint smile cross Serena's face as for a moment her more playful side poked its head through the serious mask that had taken over her mind. Serena mocked her mother as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Excuse me it's not my fault I'm now in a bigger size then you."

She teased dramatically, showing again why Lily had always called Serena her sunshine little actress. There hadn't been a day when Serena was young that she hadn't smiled and that had been what told Lily that the years that had passed she'd made the right decision about everything.

No we won't talk
We won't say a word
I know
You've heard this before
Don't speak, liar

"Um, maybe I should come back in here later?"

Eric's footsteps hadn't been heard in the confusion and giggles of mother and daughter as the teenage boy poked his head in the room. Serena and Lily both looked up to the dirty blond haired boy with genuine smiles. As he stepped further in the room Serena saw what he held in his hands and lunged at him causing him to drop the bag of Oreos and the peanut butter and head for her bed.

It was moments like watching her son and daughter that Lily knew she'd made the right decision for herself so many years ago. Of course she loved Rufus back then, and she still did now. But as she watched her children interact and stuff peanut butter dipped Oreos in one another's mouths a smile crossed Lily Van der Woodsen's face. Her son may have been gay and her daughter may have been eighteen and pregnant but they were both in ways happy. That was all that mattered. The only thing that Lily worried about was now that her past had been brought to the surface maybe she too had to confront it and set an example for Serena to follow, only her news to Dan would be much more pleasant then the things that Lily had to tell Rufus.

Sit back
And tell me why
I'm so prone to this
Do you think I'm fond of
Getting you and letting you down
And I'll get mine soon