Pose –Chapter Four-
The morning that Roxas woke in was just the same as the day before, but this time the surroundings were not that of the old run-down motel out in the inner city, with the red letters of a dusty black alarm blinking in the dim light filtering through the shades. He seemed to feel uncomfortable being here, even more so that being in the inner city itself, filled with its variety of whores and con men. His eyes looked a dull as ever, his mouth opening for a slow yawn as he tried to refrain from moving too much. He didn't want to be here. He wanted to die, he was supposed to die. That was where Axel was…that was why…oh god, the guilt! It was eating him alive like worm, working its way from his ruptured heart through his veins like fire. He couldn't stand it, the pain that tried to break from his skull was like the pressure of ten miles underwater. He pulled his cold palms to his forehead, pressing hard to the skin, hoping that maybe he could break from the terror growing inside his head.
"Axel…" He moaned in a pained choke as he scrambled to break his head free of the pain.
The redhead was sitting on the end of the bed, legs suddenly breaking out of their frozen position and whisking to the poor blonde. He wanted to help. He wanted to save his heart from breaking, but nothing he could do nothing to stop the pain in his Roxy's mind. Eating away at every last sane thought until it was darkness. And all at once he was back in the dark alley, watching as another pulled out a bag half-filled with nachos and corner store hot dogs.
"Here, Roxas." Demyx smiled, handing the small boy a hot dog, and twisting a packet of ketchup over it in a bloody red stream. "I'm sure you're starving."
The smile was genuine as the boy took a small bite of his offered food. He really didn't want to talk about it with Demyx, he just wanted to be free.
"So, how is Sora doing, and Namine? And Cloud?" His questions were unstopping, the glint of interest in his eyes was precious as he pulled out an off-yellow chip and bit down.
Roxas just continued biting into the hot dog. It wasn't a very good meal, the meat was undercooked and the bun was a bit soggy, no doubt from the conditions it probably lasted in since 1920.
Demyx continued playing his odd one-sided version of Twenty questions until the smaller blonde finally spoke.
"Why'd you leave?" The innocent blue eyes shimmered as he watched for a reaction from the mullet-haired brother.
The haggard sigh followed soon after, Demyx rubbing the back of his neck uneasily. "Well, Roxy, I know it sounds stupid…but at the time…well, you know how teenagers get…I…well, I'm gay."
Roxas wasn't in the least surprised at this announcement. "Is that why you ran away? Because you were gay?"
"Well…" Demyx murmured, eyes shifting to the concrete they were seated on. "There's…well…there's a somebody."
"A somebody? You actually found a somebody in the world that never was?" He asked, shifting position from his Indian-style-crossed legs to leaning against the wall of the nearby building.
Demyx laughed. "Yeah." His smile was so sweet, so happy as his eyes glittered with hope. "He works at Assassin."
"Is that why you didn't want me to go with that guy?" His face deadpanned, standing up and wiping his hands on his jeans as he began to walk from the back of the alley. "Because you were afraid that I'd mess up your perfect free life?" The anger spilled from his body like acid and he had no idea where it came from.
"Roxas…no I didn't…Marluxia…he's…" But there was no longer anyone there to listen to his warning, no one left to hear his pleas, and yet again, he'd lost something dear to him.
The photographs that Roxas held in between his shaking fingers were that of a dark dingy room, a small broken boy laying amidst teddy bears and blankets, his bright blue eyes that mirrored the watcher like silk, a smooth gaze that kept on hoping.
Hoping had given up long ago. It wasn't worth it to hope anymore. He hadn't felt so alone since Demyx had run away. But still—there was someone here, a presence wrapped around him like strong arms, the smooth heated breath that tickled the back of his neck as he fell to the softness of the grasp.
He couldn't remember why he had run away from this room anymore, the more he thought about it, the more grief piled on. He was beginning to look like a ghost, darkened eyes and swollen cheeks, pale frozen skin and a soft breathing that was barley audible. But now, he was happy he had run away. He had met him and that would have been worth the world.
Through playful lips made of yarn
That fragile Capricorn
Unraveled words like moths upon old scarves
I know the world's a broken bone
But melt your headaches, call it home
/--\\--/--\\--/--\\
Axel gazed over the cityscape, his envy colored eyes shimmering in the dimming sunlight of the twilight. It was so much more peaceful that the World that Never was. So much more alive, it was hard to think of a reason for Roxas to even want to leave this paradise. The wind blew at the perfect speed, only moving his fallen ruby spikes in a small short burst, as he took a slow deep breath. It had been a long time since he had felt so at peace, since there was such a trouble lifted off his shoulders. It was beautiful.
He didn't want to know the reason that the small blonde had entered the Organization, the whole-cult scene fix Roxas any better than it had himself. Life was weird that way, and destiny pulled their bodies in so many wrong directions in the end--there were no mistakes.
"No, Axel." The shrill voice cut through the phone's speaker like glass on a chalkboard, even sharper than that of nails. "I'm sorry I can't help. But I have to use my left-over cash for college. You know that."
Axel sighed, nodding to himself, but saying nothing to the girl on the other end of the conversation, "But…Kai…I seriously need it…I mean…com'on!" He practically screamed. "I used all my cash on the last spend, and that only kept for about a week!"
The girl wouldn't have this excuse, her fingers pinching the bridge of her nose as her brow defined into frown-lines. "No, again, Axel. Maybe…maybe this time you can go clean, you know? Sparkly-white! How about you come over to my house on Saturday? As long as you stay off the stuff, you're more than welcome to hang with me and 'ku."
Axel let out a long howl, pained and angry. "No! Kairi! You don't understand! It's the pain! The withdrawal! I feel like I'm going to die! I need it now!"
"Axel," She murmured before reaching an out of service bar as her phone went dead.
"Damn it! Damn it all! God-damned money!" He tossed the single phone to the wall, shattering it's plastic body into shards on the floor. He heard a soft knock. The knock was common on his bedroom's door, usually coming from the supervisor of the motel to tell him to 'shut the fuck up', but this time, he knew it wasn't. "Come in."
Immediately as he turned and caught a sight of blonde spikes, covered over light blue eyes, shimmering with unfallen tears that threatened to rain down his cheeks, he stood there sobbing and shaking as he fell into the redhead's arms. Axel knew, maybe…just maybe…this time he could quit.
Axel's hands shifted around the syringe he had pulled from his pocket, which he threatened to throw down on the ground next to the small plastic medicine bottle and a dark dirty Polaroid picture.
I wanna scream
Let the rain fall down
I'm coming clean, I'm coming clean
I'm shedding
Shedding every color
Trying to find a pigment of truth
Beneath my skin
/--\\--/--\\--/--\\
The clicking of keys rang shrilly through the darkened bedroom, the only light illuminating from the bright computer screen, sending the dark rings beneath Cloud's eyes to turn a multitude of colors as various pop-ups were clicked away. The tiny windows that littered the screen were really starting to get on his nerves as he tried to click them all away. But one caught his eye. It was a picture of Roxas. Well, truthfully it was a picture of Roxas amongst a group of boys. He had never seen those boys before, and they had never come around the house. But the position of the bodies…it was well, sexual. It was very odd positioning for the picture that was around his baby brother.
The thin blonde's arms were circled around a small plush animal; bows placed his hair like he was a child, giving him a deep cherubic appearance. It was to say the least, porn.
But, Roxas? Not his brother?
But then it left Cloud to think. What had Roxas been up to for the month he was gone? What had he gotten himself into?
"Perfect…" the man purred from behind the camera. The flashes of light filling up the darkness in quick streaks as the blonde's pupils again reverted to the darkness as the light faded away.
The man regained his full height, fluffing a tuft of peach colored hair behind his shoulder. "You know, Roxie--you look absolutely delish." He smirked, grabbing the boys butt as he walked from the camera and to the boy to position him further. "These photos will sure bust in some cash."
"But what about me?" Roxas spoke up in a soft voice, almost broken in the sadness of what he had come to.
"Yes…Yes…" The man shooed as he tossed a few dollars in the boy's way. "As soon as I get these on the internet, you're sure to have that taken over, babe."
Roxas glanced to the dirty bills lying on the stained carpeting. "Did Yue do this before he started downstairs?"
"Nope, Roxie-babe." The man flipped another tuft of hair. "Yue started way off of this, you are further ahead, my little kitten." He tugged this time on a piece of Roxas' hair, which had been earlier curled into a soft bundle of blonde spikes. "And if he hadn't found your idiot brother, then god knows he'd probably be out of the biz by now."
The anger had finally lifted. "Idiot?" Roxas' eyes furled. "Don't you dare call Demyx an idiot. He may be sort of off sometimes, but he's far from idiotic!"
That was when the hand met with his face, causing the peach colored flesh to become inflamed by a reddened burst of blood to the source. "Don't use that tone of voice with me, Roxie." The man muttered, holding Roxas by his wrists, pinning the struggling boy against the dusty brick wall. "I hold the cards, babe. And whether or not you see Axel again is far from in your reach without me."
Roxas immediately stopped. "I'll…take more photos…" he murmured defeated, handing back the three dollar bills. "Just…promise you'll tell me where he is!"
"Yeah, Yeah." The man muttered again, stepping back behind the camera. "Sure, babe, but here…" a piece of black cloth was thrown in Roxas' direction. It was far to skimpy to be anything normal. "Now, put that on, and we'll try some real sexy shots."
/--\\--/--\\--/--\\
With eyes that make me stumble
Somehow not speaking lets me know everything
I go out, You eat in
Hot from the situation
You're naked in daylight
Wrap yourself up and goodnight
End Chapter Four
A/N: Yeah, I know, this is a really short chapter, but I have two more chapters in order to finish this, and I wanted to save each of the events for both of them, but FYI, the man behind the camera is Marluxia. In my stories, he's sort of always a pervert, so I s'pose you have to get used to it. LOL. Axel is in some pretty deep waters now, but of course, you prolly aren't too sure what they are. There, my friends, lies the answer in the coming chapters. And yes. I know I used Hilary Duff lyrics. I used to listen to her all the time, and it sort of fit. Though…not really. Read and review, the faster I'll get up Chappie 5 I entitled the last two already. Five-GazeSix-Savior