Title: Girly
Disclaimer: I do not own
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: genderbending
Characters/Pairings: Russia/fem!America
Summary: Alfred's always kept her secret from everyone but on one winter afternoon Russia finds out.
The clock chimed midnight and Ivan frowned at the stack of papers still before him, this was getting ridiculous. Over the last few days he had been growing steadily behind in his work because he kept thinking about America. He would wonder how much she was panicking about him knowing her secret. Then he would try and picture her with long hair and wearing a sundress. What did she look like under that jacket? The slight glimpse he had gotten of her had been just enough to shock him but no concrete image had formed itself in his mind. He shook his head, there he went again. There would be time to think of her later but for now he had to get back to work.
He had just fallen into a rhythm when he was halted by the feeling of eyes on him. Ivan looked up to see a maid staring at him like she was wondering if he was okay. He was just about to ask what was the matter when he realized that he had been humming "America the Beautiful" under his breath.
He growled in annoyance with himself and the maid fled. This was not the way this was supposed to go, he was not the one supposed to be entirely fixated, she was the one supposed to be thinking about him. If she was going to invade his thoughts then he should just visit her instead of just sitting here. He would pack for a short trip immediately and sleep on the way there.
The loud knocking on her door woke America and she blinked and stared at the alarm clock, it was eleven so she couldn't justifiably bash their head into the floor, she might do it anyway it was England though. She had finished all her paperwork at nine last night and had decided that she had time for some videogames, but she had gotten so sucked into it that by the time she looked at the clock it had been five in the morning. But six hours of sleep wasn't that bad right? Once she got a burger and coffee in her she'd be raring to go. But first she needed to answer the door; just in case it was Russia she didn't want to have to fix the door again. She threw on her jacket before heading to the door, giving a half assed attempt at making it look a little less like she had just climbed out of bed, though the flannel pajama pants were probably a dead give away. When she opened the door she saw Russia standing there, they stared at one another before he cocked his head and asked, "Isn't my good friend America going to invite me in?
Damn, her morning just had to suck didn't it? For any other country she would have forced a smile and started blabbering away but because it was Ivan she settled with an annoyed, "Whatever." Then she turned and walked towards the kitchen, she knew he'd follow her in and she really needed food if she was going to handle him while she was half awake.
As he followed her he noticed that under her jacket she was wearing pajamas and her hair was even more of a mess than usual and asked, "Did I wake you?" It would figure that she was lazy enough to sleep in until eleven.
She nodded as they entered the kitchen and headed straight towards the fridge. "Yeah, I had a late night."
Russia took a seat at the table knowing that America wouldn't even think to invite him to do so. "I see, you must have too much work on your plate." Or maybe she hadn't been able to sleep knowing that he knew her secret, the thought made him smile.
Not even really paying attention she said, "Sure, let's say that." Then she found the plate of burgers she had left in the fridge and pulled them out. She hummed quietly to herself as she popped them into the microwave and proceeded to get out the buns and started the coffee pot up.
"Is that your breakfast?" He had seen America eat such food at early meetings before but had always thought that was just for convenience sake.
"Yep, want some?" It was at least polite to offer since they never gave out food on airplanes anymore. Besides, maybe if Russia was busy chewing he wouldn't start talking until she was done too.
"A burger please."
After she wolfed down her food as fast as he had seen a bear demolish a deer she stood and announced, "I'm gonna go get changed so just stay down here and don't mess with anything." She would still have to check her house for traps after this but being in her pajamas was just asking for trouble.
"Of course not." She huffed in disbelief before heading up the stairs and Ivan turned back to his burger, it wasn't as bad as the ones that came from a fast food place. He had just finished and was wiping his fingers on a napkin when America came back down the stairs dressed as she normally did. He asked, "Why dress like that when I already know your secret? Put on something more comfortable." It was important to remind her that he knew she was a girl and to also encourage her to feel comfortable showing that side of her around him. She would then begin to associate him with a freedom that she normally didn't have and as such a freedom lover he was sure she wouldn't be able to ignore that.
She raised an eyebrow and said, "This is comfortable."
He gave her a smile, "If you say so, shall we go for a walk?" It was important not to push her, when she was his though... that would be a different story. He didn't notice that his smile had mutated into a less friendly one and America was looking at him warily.
They headed out of the house and as they walked down the street several people waved to Alfred. But she wasn't trying to start up a conversation so he decided it was up to him. A question came to him and he asked, "What should I call you since you have a boy name?"
She scowled, "My name is Alfred, that's the name I was given and I like it." England had given it to her and she wasn't going to part with it just because someone had found out about her being a girl.
"Very well." It really didn't matter to him but from the look on her face he knew better than to try and shorten it to something like Ally, though he might try it sometime he wanted to make her mad. They fell silent as they continued walking and without even asking they both turned into the entrance of the park. Alfred didn't even care; she just let herself follow Russia as she thought about what she actually needed to do today. It was because of this that she didn't even notice the flower stand until Ivan asked, "Would you like some flowers?"
"Absolutely not." She knew he was just trying to make fun of her or this was some kind of mind game. But even though she had to be polite to him so that he didn't tell her secret she wasn't going to just agree with whatever he suggested.
"Why not, they're pretty." And fresher than any he had seen back home, the sunflowers seemed to flutter their petals at him, like eyelashes.
"Then get some for yourself."
He turned away from the flower stall to look at her and ask, "Are you angry at me?" He didn't see why she would be; all he was offering was some flowers, women were supposed to like flowers just as much as he did. He knew anytime he gave his sisters flowers they smiled at him, well Belarus also demanded he marry her but she was still happy.
She unclenched her fists as she replied, "No— just annoyed. I had hoped you wouldn't treat me any differently after finding out and here you are saying stupid stuff to me." Alfred didn't want to be treated like a girl; she liked machines, guns, flying and anything else that caught her attention.
"It is not stupid, you are a girl and I am trying to treat you like one. It must be hard having to hide who you really are." He knew that feeling all too well, in this age of peace he was never allowed to be sadistic as he wanted to be.
"But this is me. I act the way I feel like almost all the time." Probably a bit too much of the time if she was honest with herself.
The more she spoke the more of a puzzle she was becoming and the more Russia found himself interested in her, before he had always just thought about her power. He asked, "What about when you don't?"
A wry smile pulled up the corner of her mouth, "Even I know a little about discretion."
Though that all made sense he had to know, "Don't you want the world to see you as you are, a woman?" She was a handsome one and Russia knew that he would be happy to be seen with her. He smiled as a new idea came to him.
The answer was yes, sometimes she did dream of wearing dresses and not being made fun of for her weird food cravings. "Occasionally, but for my country's sake that's not possible." She wasn't blind, she saw how male counties acted towards female one, how they tried to protect them, how the women rarely lived on their own.
"But what if you could not be connected to being America?" He didn't want to come right out and say what he was thinking, he had to test the waters because if she thought it was a stupid idea he in turn would look stupid and he hated that, the strong never looked foolish.
"I suppose that would be kinda nice, but when's that going to happen?" Her entire life was for her country; she fought with them in battle, dealt with paperwork, and went to social events for them. But it wasn't so bad to do all that because she also got to happy with them and her people were so happy; they tried to let pain roll off them like water off a duck's back.
That sounded enough like a yes for him to say, "I have just the event, all of us European countries are holding a Midwinter Ball, I don't have a date yet so you can accompany me."
"What?" Somehow that sentence didn't make sense to her. She had always known about the Midwinter Ball but had never actually gone, or cared that she wasn't invited.
He smiled, "It's prefect, America is not supposed to be there, you will simply be my pretty escort." Also it would be a perfect opportunity to snap a few black mail pictures of her in a dress in case she ever decided to cause him trouble.
"But a Ball sounds fancy and I don't have any dresses." She could count on one hand how many times she had worn one. Mrs. Washington had let her borrow one once to try on after she had found her secret. The second time she worn one was so she wasn't recognized as she crossed the German countryside when her plane had been shot down. The third, the third had been in a dress she had went and bought and had wanted to try it on, she had wanted to show someone but things hadn't worked out, it was best not to dwell on it.
He waved that aside, "Come to my house the day of the Ball and I will take care of you."
She frowned up at him and a jolt ran through him, she had not looked at him so intently since the Cold War and he had missed that. "Why are you doing this?"
In return he gave her his biggest smile and asked, "Can I not just be a good friend?" There had been a time when America would have agreed they were friends, back in the days of tsars.
"We spent about half a century close to blowing each other up." She would like to forget but she knew that European nations never forgot anything. England was still angry about her gaining her independence and would bring it up every single fucking time he was drunk.
"True, but water under the bridge." Compared to all the other wars he had been in the Cold War had been not so bad, his people had not died by foreign hands, he had not been forced to burn his beloved cities and farms. He could forgive her for opposing him; it would only make the day when she would be one with him sweeter.
When she thought about it this might also be an interesting opportunity to see how everyone acted when she wasn't around. "Fine, I'll come, but I'll be watching you."
"I would expect nothing less from you Sunflower." The nickname slipped from his tongue, he could vaguely remember using it back when they had been close.
She hoped to god that she wasn't blushing but the heat spreading across her face told her otherwise, "Don't call me that!" She took a swing at him with one fist, missing his head only by inches as he dodged.
A laugh burst some his throat, harsh in its truth, as he distanced himself from her and told her, "The ball is January 3rd, I'll be expecting you around three in the afternoon Sunflower." He expected the next blow and danced back even farther until she was on one side of the path and he on the other.
She closed in on him and he turned and ran, she shouted, "Damn it, get back here, I'm going to crush your skull!"
But he didn't stop running and she gave chase, steadily gaining ground on him under they reached the edge of the park. A car was waiting for Russia right where he had told it to be, he had expected to be able to offer America a ride home, not slamming the door and ordering the driver to just drive like he was being chased by Belarus. It didn't surprise him when she kept chasing him, powerful legs eating up the ground. He regretted having to skip a fight but if she got any bruises now they would not heal before the Ball. But hopefully after seeing her and having something to look forward to he'd be able to focus better on his work.
America stopped after three blocks, breathing a little harder than normal and then she realized that she was laughing between breathes. This had been a good day, it reminded her of times when they have been this close, when she would have just grumbled at the nickname while blushing on the inside. Hearing him call her that again reminded her of the time when she had almost let him know her secret by her own free will.
The remembrance was a punch in the guts, for so long she had forced herself to forget that they could get along. She had had a major crush on Ivan, who didn't treat her like a child; he treated her like an equal. As she walked home through the chill she could admit that she had even loved him. When he had had his revolution she had been so happy, she had believed that now he would be a country for the people by the people they could be together.
But then she had visited him, a dress packed in her suitcase, she had planned to invite him for a walk after dinner and wear it. He had greeted her with an insane smile and while he had always been a little off it had never been this bad. Ivan talked about death and killing and how if he killed enough then everything would be fine. Then he had begun saying that she was a filthy capitalist bastard for now but soon she'd see the light and change. Even if he had to make her. That had scared her and the dress had stayed in the suitcase, she had thrown it out once she got home. But now that the war was over she was beginning to see bits of the man she had loved show though again. Maybe this Ball would be a good chance to see what she should think of him now.