Disclaimer: I do not own any of the twilight characters you recognize, all the ones you don't are mine.

Chapter 6:

Healing Bruises and Fallen Trees

It was 10:00 pm and not only had it been dark for several hours, but I had also been lying in bed staring at the same water spot on my ceiling for the same amount of time. For the first hour of waiting I had gotten out of bed and closed the window over and over, but in the end I would always go back and open it. Open, close, open, close, Edward, Jacob, Edward, Jacob, how could someone as bland and mediocre as myself have to make such a decision between two tremendous people.

I looked over to the clock once more and read 10:05 and as soon as I did I knew he was here. I looked over at the chair on the opposite end of the room and there he was. He his eyes showed anger, but he didn't speak. I also was without words or breathe, so I just sat there looking into his eyes and letting the tears fall down my face. When he saw my water works his chest puffed up and he sat up like he was going to get out of the chair, to comfort me I'm sure, but I couldn't let that happen. I was the one who had caused him pain, and to expect him or even let him comfort me was more than an overload on my guilt.

I sniffed it in and wiped my eyes, "Edward…" I said getting up from my bed.

He put his hand out to stop me from reaching him, signaling for me to stay back. My heart dropped, because I had truly broke his, the one thing he left me in charge of I let fall to ground and stomped all over it. "Don't," he said, "before you or I say anything I want you to know that this is real, that whatever emotions you are feeling are yours and only yours, I don't want you to regret or have an excuse to take back anything."

"How?" I said my knees loosing all tension.

"Jasper is outside, and according to Carlisle, his presence can negate the hold that the philia has on you," his voice was dry and without emotion, he looked down in a desperate attempt to not make eye contact with me. I went over to the window and looked down, sure enough I saw Jasper sitting with his back against a tree looking back up at me. "I saw what happened Bella, and I think I know why you did it."

"There is no way you know why I did it Edward, I don't even know why I did it," I said defensively.

"Bella please, just let me finish. Like I said I think I know why it happened and there is more than one reason. I can't give you what you want my love, I wish I could be as open and physical with my feelings as Jacob is, but I truly would never forgive myself if I hurt you. Last night was hard on you, we came so close to getting what we both have wanted for so long and I cut it short because it just didn't seem right. I also recognize how hard hearing that your feelings for me may not have been all yours from the beginning…"

That was it I couldn't let him blame himself for everything that happened the past two days, "Edward stop!" I screamed and held my hands over my ears like a five year old, "None of this is your fault, and I won't let you sit here and try to make me feel better about it. In the end I cheated, and I hurt you. BE MAD AT ME! YOU HAVE TO BE MAD AT ME! YOU HAVE TO HATE ME EDWARD!"

That's when his eyes switched to pain and sadness. He got up out of the chair and walked over to me, taking my shaking and clammy hands into his strong and able ones. "Bella the day I hate you, is the day I stop loving you, and that day will never come as long as I live, if that's what I'm doing."

"Edward…please," the tears flooded my face and my breathing got erratic, "I don't know what I was thinking, I love you Edward."

His cold hand touched my face and wiped away the latest tear that had fallen. "I believe you Bella, Jasper being outside proves it. What I need to know is that I can give you what you need and be the person you need me to be, but you need to know it too, and find it out on your own. I want you to explore your options."

"There are no other options Edward, there's only you."

"The fact that you say that scares me Bella, especially because we both know how you feel about Jacob, I saw you open and close the window," Edward brought his arms forward and engulfed me. "I'm going to let you go Bella, and if you want me, I'll be waiting, but promise me that if you come back you will be done with him, forever."

"Done being his friend?"

"Unfortunately yes, I just can't see you two being friends after what happened today." He said as he slowly pushed away from me, "I still have some human feelings left, and the jealousy would rip me up inside."

I didn't know what to say, he was right. There was something there with Jacob and I couldn't deny it anymore, but Edward was my Edward and I loved him. How could I let him go? How could I let Jacob go? Edward dropped his arms and walked toward the window, turning his back on me. He put one leg out and turned to look at me one last time. He smiled his crooked smile and was gone. I ran to the window and looked down, but both Edward and Jasper had disappeared into the night.

Weeks passed while I was waiting for Charlie to trust me enough to let me leave the house for more than just school. My foot had properly healed and Carlisle had taken the walking cast off. Edward and I had decided to start over as friends and see where it leaded. Unfortunately for me, but much to Edwards delight, Jacob did not go to my school, and therefore I had not seen him in weeks. We talked on the phone for hours about everything, except what happened in the kitchen.

After a full month of lockdown Charlie called me downstairs to talk. When I reached the living room, Charlie had his fishing gear on and was beaming, it was the first beautiful day forks has had since I had been grounded.

"Hey Charlie, you look happy," I said plopping down on the couch.

"It's beautiful outside, I'm going fishing finally," he said with a laugh.

"So what was it that you needed to talk to me about?"

"You have handled being grounded very well Bella; I think I'm going to parole you today for good behavior."

"Parole," I said confused.

"Yep, you are free to leave the house when you want but you will have a curfew of 11:00 and if I find out you missed even one class, you're right back here for another stint in Charlie prison."

"I think I can handle 11:00," I said my voice getting higher, I couldn't contain my excitement.

"Good, go look outside," he said and walked into the kitchen to get the fishing tackle planted on the counter.

I walked over to the front door, not knowing what to expect, but absolutely shocked at what I saw. My baby was home, ever since I smashed my truck into the tree it had been MIA. I asked both the Cullens and my father where it was, with no clear answer. The Cullens honestly didn't know, they even said they looked for it and couldn't find it after it was towed out of their front yard. Charlie, when asked about my beloved car, would tell me that I didn't need to know because I grounded.

There it was, no more dent, and no more smoke coming from the engine. The tires had been reattached and it even had a new paint job hiding all the rust that was growing on it like mold. That wasn't my only surprise; I ran to my baby but stopped when I looked inside. Jacob was in the driver's seat looking very pleased with himself. His hair was growing out again, and if it was possible, I think he grew a couple inches as well. He hopped out of the car and came running towards me, he picked me up and hugged me so tight I thought I was loosing blood to my extremities.

"Jacob, put me down," I said smiling, "what is it with wolves and picking people up to hug them?"

"Sorry," he said and put me down, but he didn't let go. We stood there in each other's arms for a very long moment. When he finally did let go I got a better look at him, and I didn't like what I saw.

"Jacob what happened to your face," I said brushing my hand against the bruises and cuts that lay there. His face was a mess, both eyes were black, his lip had a large slash in it that was now scabbing up, and his left cheek was just one big yellow healing bruise.

"Get in, I have a lot to explain to you." He walked me over to the driver's side and ran around and got into the passenger's side.

I had forgotten how much I missed driving, the past month Charlie had been dropping me off at school in his police cruiser, and Edward had been driving me home everyday, though I told Charlie that I walked home. He told me to head toward La Push and that he would explain on the way. About two minutes into the drive, after relishing being behind the wheel again, I couldn't take not knowing anymore.

"So…," I pushed.

"Well Ayden went back home three weeks ago, he seemed content with what happened the day you came over, and Sam didn't tell him everything about you and about the Cullens. I guess he wasn't as satisfied as he led on."

"What do you mean," I sounded scared, I didn't know Ayden, but from the couple of moments I had spent with him and what Jacob had said about him, I knew that he could be threatening to everything I loved.

"He came back about a week ago, and he wasn't alone. He brought his entire pack with him and Bella, they are big. They are actually huge, and very well organized, they're like an army. When they came back they told Sam that they were taking over the pack and getting rid of whatever problem it was that Ayden could smell when you came over. They don't fully know about our treaty with the Cullens, and even if they did, Ayden seems hell bent on getting rid of them."

"He can't do that can he, is he allowed? Don't you have rules or something?" Panic was showing in my voice.

"Not really, like I said, they are very strong, very organized, and highly motivated that what they are doing is for the good of everyone. Bella, they could kill everyone if they wanted."

"So what are we going to do, how can we get them out of here and away from the Cullens," I was worried, if they could do that to Jacob's face, one of their own, how could they possibly understand the way the Cullens live isn't dangerous to anybody.

"We have a pack meeting tonight that Sam organized and asked Ayden to attend. We are going to try and explain the treaty to them and see if they back off because we have it handled."

"Can I come? Maybe I can explain that the Cullens don't feed on people, that they aren't dangerous."

"I don't know if that's a good idea Bells, this pack is rough, and I don't how they will respond to the "Vampire Girl," he said and his face dropped into sadness.

"Jacob…I'm not that anymore. Me and Edward…were not me and Edward anymore." I said solemnly.

"Was it that day we made fish for Charlie?" he couldn't hold back his smile; he knew I was upset and was trying not to show his excitement in respect for me, but I could see the corners of his mouth inching upward.

"Yeah, that and some other stuff, we both decided to start over and see where it leads." I had to fight back tears, every time I thought about the night Edward decided we should take time apart it re-broke my heart, every time it was the same, and every time it killed me.

We pulled up to Jacob's house just as it was starting to pour; Charlie was going to be pissed when I came home, his fishing trip was ruined. I ran to his front door and into his house, but when I turned around Jacob wasn't there. I went back to the door and saw Jacob staring at me, soaked and letting the rain fall on him.

"JAKE WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I screamed not sure he could hear me over all the rain.

"COME HERE!" he screamed back, "I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING!"

I walked out onto his front porch and stared at him, it was pouring, and getting wet in a place where the temperature never got over 40 degrees was just asking to get pneumonia. He took a few steps up the stair and grabbed my hand; he pulled me out into the rain laughing at my squinted face. He pulled me towards the tree line in his back yard, and when we reached it and entered the forest, the canopy was stopping most of the rain from hitting us. We were both dripping, and the cold was setting in, what did he want to show me? From all I could see it was just a forest, though beautiful and vibrant with its moss covered everything, and emerald splendor, but nothing too special.

"What's out here Jacob?" I said still holding his huge warm hand, which was the only thing keeping me from uncontrollable shivers.

"Nothing," he whispered and turned towards me slamming his face into mine. His wet body pushed me up against a tree and pinned me there. His wet body engulfed mine as his hands searched my body like a pirate trying to find buried treasure. His hands moved to the collar of my shirt and ripped it in half exposing my polka dot lace bra. Our lips separated as he moved his head down to the newly discovered area that had been revealed. His mouth lapped over my breasts giving me a sensation that could only be described as pure bliss, only stopping for a second while I pulled his shirt over his head. His height made his body bend out with this adjustment to where he was kissing, giving my enough room to undo his pant and slide them to the ground.

As soon as they were off he lifted me by the rear and pulled me close to him. My legs encompassed his waist as he carried me to a gigantic fallen tree. He laid me down on it, and I was surprisingly soft, the moss blanketed the tree and masked the harsh feel of the bark. Jacob undid my pants and pulled them down along with my underwear in one fluid motion. His head moved lower once again and stopped as he breathed heavily into me.

"Jacob…" I moaned as his tongue entered me and started making circles in a clockwise direction. My hands grabbed hold of his newly grown hair and held tight. It was the only thing that kept me from screaming in pleasure. I wanted this and I wanted him, I pulled his head up with all my force and brought it back to my mouth.

He slid himself inside of me and we both let out the pent up breath we had been holding for too long. His pace matched my heartbeat before he started to speed up. He moved his mouth to my neck and slowly grinded he teeth into it. I took my hands from his back and moved them to either side of his face pulling back to look at me. He smiled at me but was concentrating very hard, his pace slowed but his pumps became harder. His body got more and more tense, but his eye never left mine. In that moment we were more connected then ever before both physically and spiritually we were one. He closed his eyes as a rush of warmth came off of him that I could feel both on the out side and the inside of my body.

Both rain and sweat dripped of him and onto me as he let go of his strength and rested on top of me. We breathed in unison for the next 20 minutes before he pulled himself up again and looked into my eyes, "I am so in love with you Bella, but it's more than love, there is no word for how much you mean to me."

I kissed once more and nodded my head.

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