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Chapter Five

Excuses

Though it was a little ridiculous, Kate had noticed from their first meeting that Jack wasn't wearing a wedding ring. But what was even more ridiculous, she thought at least, was that he was still on her mind three days after the office visit.

She'd never been the type to pine away after men. She'd never been boycrazy or lovestruck or fallen in love at first sight like all the movies said. And she almost never had boyfriends, not that she wasn't given the opportunity. It was just easier to push people away than to let them in.

Not that Kate had anything to hide. She'd had a fairly normal existence in her thirty years. It wasn't out of the ordinary anymore to grow up with only one parent. She and Diane had done just fine.

Sam sat awkwardly on the couch next to her, and flipped through the channels until he settled on ESPN.

"Like golf?" he asked, unsure of where to start the conversation. He'd insisted that Kate not spend all of her time in the hotel room, and had even invited her to stay with him, but she knew he was just being polite.

Kate shrugged. "It's alright, I guess. Never really got into sports."

She didn't mean to shut him out, but Sam leaned back into the couch and stared at the TV.

After their meeting with Dr. Shephard, Kate had tried to ask Sam what he thought, but Sam had shot her down, and she hadn't had the nerve to bring it back up.

"So…" she hesitated, fingering the fabric on the arm of the couch, thinking at the last moment that she should ask him about the rules of golf instead of accidentally upsetting him. "You're seeing Dr. Shephard again, right?"

"Tuesday," he mumbled, then took a breath and stopped short. "I'm doing this for you, you know," he said, and Kate could see that he was sincere, and even though they were new to each other, she was sure that had he known of her existence, Sam would have been a great father.

She gave him a small, sad smile. "I know."

"He seems like a good guy, Dr. Shephard."

"Yeah. I think so."

"So, what? You got a boyfriend back home?"

Kate blinked, fighting back the urge to widen her eyes and get the hell out of there. Could Sam read her mind? Did he sense something between her and Jack?

Instead she just shrugged. "Never been one for boyfriends," she said, letting out a laugh. It had always bothered her that she didn't have someone to lean on, but she never admitted it. She was too independent.

"So that's a no," Sam stated, rising slowly, weakly, from the couch and pulling a beer out of the fridge, popping the top of with skill.

"…Should you be drinking that?" Kate hadn't seen him eat anything for quite awhile, and he refused food every time she offered to make him something. His last chemo treatment had left him fatigued, and though he tried to hide it, she'd heard him getting sick in the bathroom several times. It made him uncomfortable; she could easily see that, to admit how sick he was in front of her, so she didn't mention it. Kate figured if there was something terribly wrong she would know.

He smirked. "Gotta live like you're dying."

Kate laughed despite the morbidity of his statement. He was rather wry given the chance. She wondered why he didn't have someone else by his side.

"And what about you? Any girlfriends I don't know about?"

He shook his head. "We're not talking about me."

"So that's a no," she repeated his statement and sunk back into the comfortable cushions. She liked this side of their relationship.

He laughed again, and Kate decided that it needed to happen more often.

Sam's awkward pause told Kate he was trying to muster up the courage to make her uncomfortable. It seemed to be a running theme in their new camaraderie. "Then what about Dr. Shephard? Jack? He doesn't wear a ring."

When she couldn't think of a witty reply, Kate simply let out a snort. "What? I haven't even thought about that," she lied. "And just because he's not wearing a ring doesn't mean that we should run off together into the sunset. I mean, we hardly know each other and I don't even know if he thinks of me like that, and I'm not looking for anything—"

Sam took a swig from his beer and shrugged. "You seem to have a lot of opinions for not even thinking about it."

Later that night, when Sam had been sick over and over, and had even complained to Kate about it, she felt she was out of options. He had been taking his medications as prescribed by Dr. Holland, but Kate was in no mood to speak with the opinionated doctor again.

Maybe she should just call Dr. Shephard.

Digging her cell phone out of her purse, she flipped through her addresses until she came across his personal number. She didn't think he'd mind the call.

He must have recognized her number, and Kate was overwhelmingly happy for a moment at the thought of him saving her information into his phone. "Kate, what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Oh… hi. Umm, I know that you're not an oncologist and you're not his treating doctor with the chemo, but Sam's really sick and feels worse than he has before, and I really don't wanna talk to that bitch Dr. Holland again—"

He cut her off with a laugh. "Okay then… I have his file on my laptop. Give me a second and I can check his prescription list."

"I'm really sorry to bother you when you're probably at home—"

"Kate, it's fine, really. That's what doctors are for."

She accepted his explanation and waited patiently while he browsed through the files. "The stronger dose is probably what's causing the intensity of the side effects," he explained. "Dr. Holland has prescribed him some pretty strong anti-nausea medications and believe it or not they're probably helping…"

"So there's nothing I can do? He's really bad, Jack."

The sound of his name was a bit of a shock to Jack, and he took a moment to recover. It felt so… personal.

"Well, it's really the same as treating any other form of nausea. When he can eat, try dry, bland foods like toast or crackers, make sure he's drinking slowly but getting plenty of liquids if possible. Unfortunately I can't really let him take anything else because of the dosage of his current prescriptions. It's just one of those things…"

She explained the frequency of his vomiting and her concern that he may be too sick to get his chemo on Monday.

"If he gets any worse, take him into ER. They can give him an IV and rehydrate him, and might be able to give him something else for the nausea."

She paused, thinking for a moment that he sounded too clinical. Then she remembered that he didn't owe her a thing. He was doing them a favor to begin with.

"I'm worried about him, that's all."

"I know you are. I know it's hard, Kate, but he may be like this for a long time to come. This isn't going to be easy, and he might get worse before he gets better…"

She shifted her weight onto her other hip, suddenly uncomfortable with the turn of their conversation, and how easily she could spill out her heart to him.

"I'm sorry I'm bothering you, this is stupid—"

"It's fine. Maybe it's none of my business, but I know that you're just getting to know your father and this is important to you. I understand."

She sighed; she couldn't understand what exactly was bothering her so much, and it bothered her even more that she had gone whining to Jack about it.

"Thank you," was all Kate managed to muster.

"I'll see you on Tuesday then? With Sam?"

Maybe it was her imagination, but he sounded hopeful, maybe slightly on edge. Like maybe he was looking forward to seeing her as much as she was to him.

"Yeah."

Not trusting herself to anymore conversation, she snapped her phone shut quickly.

He wasn't too clinical at all. That's what she was afraid of.

After his bout of intense nausea, Sam recovered in time for Monday's treatment. He went through the same thing after, but was doing okay by 3:30 Tuesday, the time of his appointment with Dr. Shephard.

They didn't wait long this time, and Sam was relieved not to have to fill out any more paperwork. Kate waited as patiently as she could when the nurse called Sam back to into one of the exam rooms. That was one place she didn't belong.

"Everything look the same?" Sam asked Jack of his current scans that showed the size of the tumor.

Jack scanned the read out and nodded. "Just about. Give the chemo some time to kick in though. You've only had three treatments since I last saw you."

"Bumping me up to four next week. Gonna be miserable."

"I won't disagree with you there, but I think it's really gonna help," Jack tried, aware of the man's fleeting optimism, if there had been any to begin with. "Okay, well I think we can have a seat in my office, maybe bring your daughter in to discuss everything?"

Sam threw a smile to his doctor, and couldn't wait to say 'I told you so' to Kate. "Heard she called you the other night. Sorry about that."

"She's just worried about you. She cares a lot, you know."

Sam nodded. "Don't deserve it."

Jack glanced down at the clipboard he held. "So what's her story?"

Sam decided not to beat around the bush. "Why you so interested?"

Flustered, Jack stuttered. "I'm not—I just wondered how things were between you two—"

Sam smiled, giving up his tease. "Don't gotta be so bashful, Doc. I think she's interested, you know."

From the way Jack's eyebrows raised, Sam wagered he might have felt the same. "I—umm, wow, I guess. Did she tell you this?"

Relieved to have stopped the medical conversation, Sam stood up, suddenly feeling the father figure. "Hell no. Kid's as stubborn as a bull. I'm not saying go marry her, but she quit her job to come out here, and she doesn't have any friends and let's face it, I'm not exactly a barrel of laughs."

Surprised at Sam's insistence, Jack sat back down. "So what do you want me to do?"

"Just be her friend. I don't know, show her around, introduce her to some people. I don't want her being so lonely."

Admittedly, Jack was happy to have a reason to see Kate more often. Sam wouldn't know it, but Jack was a bit of a loner too. It wouldn't hurt to be less focused on his work for once.

"Okay," he said hesitantly, careful not to sound too happy about it.

Sam caught on. "Relax, Doc. What's the worst that could happen?"

Unable to control his cracking smile when he entered his office and saw Kate sitting, legs crossed, immersed in the hospital-bought Van Gogh replica, Jack waved his hand in front of her face.

She looked nice, he noticed, just a hint of makeup on her freckled face that brought out all of her best features. Her outfit was thoughtfully put together.

"Hey," she mustered, trying to stop the creeping blush to her cheeks that always seemed to present itself whenever Jack was around. She wished it would stop. It gave away too much.

He noticed the pattern of blushing. Maybe Sam was right. Maybe she was interested.

"How is he?"

"No change in the tumor. Better than it growing, though," he noted, showing the scan of Sam's spinal tumor that the nurse had printed out for him. "Give the chemo a few more weeks."

"Where's Sam?" Kate asked, looking back to the doorway and noticing he had yet to appear.

Jack sat back in his chair, hoping that his explanation wasn't completely transparent. After all, Sam had practically begged him to go in there without him.

"Said he was feeling sick. He's waiting in the car. Thought you might want to hear his progress straight from the doctor."

"Well, he is good at avoiding conversation."

"So how're you getting along in LA? Was it all you expected?" he laughed; he remembered what it was like to be transplanted in LA.

Kate shrugged. "I haven't seen much of it to be honest, but I guess it's okay. I think I'll be here for awhile."

Jack tried to hold back what he could only think of as elation, and tried to pass it off as indifference. "I could show you around sometime. I mean, if that's what you wantd."

While she was beyond thrilled at the invitation, Kate wondered if traipsing about the town with her father's surgeon would be professional, or if it would provide an unhealthy distraction to his abilities.

"…Do you think that's… normal? For a doctor and his patient's daughter?"

It was exactly what Jack had wondered when Sam brought up the idea. It was actually somewhat comforting that Kate thought the same thing.

"Doesn't have to be," he said nonchalantly. "Someone has to show you around, right?"

Kate nodded, unable to think of any other reason why she shouldn't accept his invitation. "I have been feeling a little cooped up."

"Great," Jack replied, scrolling down on his laptop. "When're you free?"

Kate smiled and shook her head. She didn't want to appear too eager, but what the hell, she thought. Maybe she was supposed to come all the way out here for more than one reason.

"When am I not free?"

Up next: Kate learns about Sam's matchmaking plans. :)