"Do you think Sam's gonna come for iCarly now, you know, now that she really, really hates me?" Carly nodded, dead serious.

"She'll come. I talked to her." Freddie frowned.

"You sure?" Carly nodded again, emotionless.

"Mhm." Freddie knew Carly wasn't going to spill about Sam. She was too good of a friend for that. Him, on the other hand…

"Mama's in the house!" Sam came strolling in, waving her hands in the air.

"Are we ready to do this thang?"

"Yep. All ready. Did you eat that Buffalo Bacon like you said you were going to?"

"Mm. I do love that bacon."

"Boy, do we know it." Freddie laughed, trying to lighten the mood. An awkward silence arose. Sam didn't acknowledge Freddie at all, she just kept swinging her arms.

"I thought we were ready."

"We are. Freddie, start the countdown." Freddie sighed.

"Five… four… three… two…"

"I'm Carly!"

"And I'm Sam!"

"And we like ham!"

"In a can!"

"Maybe Spam?" both girls looked at each other, then shook their heads.

"Nah."

Freddie watched the whole show, but it was as if he wasn't even really there. He was so nervous that maybe Sam would convince Carly to be mad at him, too. At this point, Carly was all he had.

"And… Carly's making me thank our stupid Tech producer, who, by the way, has to go through a toe-wax cleaning with mummy dearest later today, so let's give a hand to Freddie." Sam pressed the "boo" button, then shrugged. "Whoops."

Freddie felt the anger build up inside of him. For a moment, he forgot that he and Sam were on the verge of not being friends. He turned the camera to face him.

"For those of you at home who do not know, Sam's mom talks to her cats." He turned the camera back to Sam, who looked just plain pissed.

"Freddie's mom still bathes him."

"Not even Sam's dog enjoys her company."

"Freddie's so annoying that no one wants to be around him." Freddie snorted.

"Oh yeah, Sam. That one hurt real bad." Sam looked capable of murder at this point. "Not even his father."

Now that one really did slice Freddie. He felt it in his chest. It wasn't even what Sam had literally said that had bothered him. It was the fact that she even wanted to go there.

"Okay, this is the end of iCarly's episode for tonight. Hope you enjoyed our random food art!" Freddie turned off the camera and put it to the side.

Sam felt it. If Sam ever doubted that Freddie hated her, she knew it now.

"What was that?" Freddie spat out each word harshly. Sam tried to seem strong, tried to look as if she was able to keep her ground.

"WHAT WAS THAT?" Freddie yelled this time. Sam flinched. Freddie had never actually screamed at her like that before.

"I—don't—know. I was mad." Freddie shook his head.

"Yeah, well I've been mad at you, too. I have never brought up anything purposely to hurt you."

Sam looked at the floor. She knew he was right. Carly looked from Freddie to Sam. "What is going on with you two? Sam, that wasn't just mean. That was disgusting."

"I know. I know." Freddie took a step closer to Sam. They were so close to each other that their noses could almost touch. Freddie's voice quivered.

"I want you to tell me exactly what I did to you. Tell me now. Tell me what I did to you." Sam continued to look at the floor. "Tell me now, Sam. Tell me."

"I don't know! I didn't mean it, it just came out! I'm sorry! I was being stupid!" Freddie took a step back. He was still fuming. He couldn't remember being this angry.

"What happened to your dad, Sam?"

"Freddie, please, no!" Carly begged. This was the worst argument they ever had.

"No. I want her to tell me. Maybe we could share."

"He didn't want me either, okay?" Sam looked up at Freddie, on the borderline of tears once again. Freddie closed his eyes. He started to relax. Sam's pain seemed to calm his own. "Okay." Sam rubbed at her eyes. The pain she was feeling now was nothing compared to the physical pain she wanted to feel. Anything would be better than what she was feeling.

"I'm sorry for what I said, but I still don't forgive you." Sam said after a while, crossing her arms stubbornly. Freddie felt his anger rise again. He thought it was gone, but apparently, it had just been hiding.

"Tell me what I did."

"You made everything complicated!"

"Sam, you and I talked! We talked everything out! There's no need to take it out on Freddie anymore!" Carly grabbed Sam's arm, trying to talk some sense into her. Sam shook her head. "We didn't. You didn't respond when I asked whether or not you still had a thing for Freddie." Freddie started to calm down again. He felt that at this point, it was the only way to get through to Sam. "Sam, why does that even matter?"

"Because it could mess everything up! You get with Carly again and then I'm either forgotten or made fun of. It's stupid." Carly gaped at Sam.

"You bet it's stupid. When were you made fun of?"

"You just weren't around to see it. And you still didn't want to answer my question. You should want to answer my question."

"Did it ever occur to you that I didn't answer your question because you replaced Freddie's name with 'nub'?" Carly raised her eyebrows at Sam, who stared at her blankly. "Nope."

"Well I don't. I honestly don't have any more feelings for Freddie." Freddie felt absolutely numb. He felt as if he was losing two halves of the world at once. Carly frowned at Freddie sympathetically. "I'm sorry. I didn't want you to find out this way."

"It's okay." Freddie was only half-lying. In one way, it was okay. In another, it wasn't. Now he lost part of Carly, too.

Sam started laughing. As seconds passed, she laughed harder and harder. Freddie rolled his eyes. "I'm glad you find this funny."

"No. What I find funny is how I still manage to be the third wheel, and how Carly continues to put you first, and how you continue to put Carly first, and how I am always last. But whatevs. Nothing ever bothers Sam. Sam will be fine."

"Sam, this isn't like you. What's gotten into you lately?" Carly asked, truly concerned. It was true. This wasn't all like Sam, to be so open and honest about what she was feeling. Yet there was some piece of the puzzle missing.

"It's okay. I don't want to bother Freddie anymore. He doesn't give a shiz." Sam started to walk towards the door.

"Sam!"

"Don't worry, Fredward. I understand. Always have, always will." Freddie couldn't stop himself. He couldn't think of doing anything else but chasing after her.