I own NOTHING of Twilight or it's characters or ANYTHING. I just write such crazy plots full of drama that it makes you crazy.

Chapter Six

Confessions

Edward POV

I always loved running with Bella. I loved the look of exhiliration on her face, the way her hair blew back in the wind. As we approached the house I gently grabbed her hand, leading her to the front door.

As we walked through, entering the house, Carlisle was there to greet us as usual. He was the reason I was here today. I needed to talk to him. Someone other than Alice had to know, and I needed help figuring out what to do. I couldn't do this on my own. It was clear to me, that I was just not strong enough. Carlisle could always tell when I needed his help with something. I tried to seem inconspicuous as I listened to Carlise after he asked us how we were liking the house. As Bella answered him, I focused.

Edward, do you need to speak with me alone? Carlisle thought.

I barely nodded my head once.

Is it serious?

I nodded again, and was saved by Bella's love of football. I was about to tell her I loved her too, before she turned and started towards the living room. I turned to Carlise as he put his hand on my shoulder and gestured for me to enter his office. I was glad Bella was with Emmett, his mouth was loud enough to drown out any conversation I had. And thankfully, it would drown this one out. I walked in as Carlisle followed me. I made myself comfortable on the couch that was against a side wall in the room, and Carlisle took his chair behind his desk. He looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to spill the beans. I heavily sighed and rested my elbows on my knees, with my face in my hands. I could hear Carlisle struggling with the different thoughts in his head. He was on the path of something dangerous was near. That was believably serious. I, on the other hand, was going to be telling him something that was unbelievably serious.

Oh dear. How much does he know? Carlisle thoughts now seemed slightly frantic.

That caught my attention. I looked up from my hands curiously at him. "What do you mean?"

"No, I was just wondering how much information you may know or have on this danger that is coming." he asked me as he ruffled through some papers on his desk. He didn't really seem to be looking for anything, just trying to look busy. I sat there for a moment watching him. Weird. I thought.

"No, Carlisle, there no danger coming our way. And you know Alice would tell you before I even knew since she lives here."

"Your right son. So what is it that I can do for you?"

I sat there as my anxiousness rose in me. I could feel myself starting to panic a little. I was worried that this man, that I did see as my father, would be dissapointed in me. I as definitely more worried about making sure Bella never found out. But I was not looking foward to seeing the look on Carlisle's face when I tell him.

"I, uh...", I was struggling for the words. "Carlisle, I've done something horrible. Something that as a man...somthing that as Bella's husband, is extremely horrible." I was afraid to look up at him, so I kept looking at my hands.

"Edward, I know you. You are a very strong man, and I know that you love Bella. And I also know Bella, and I love her as if she were my own daughter. And I know she is a extremely strong individual. So whatever it is, you two can work through it. And son, please don't take this wrong, but you do tend to overreact to some situations. So it may not be as bad as you think."

"Carlisle, I cheated on Bella."

"Oh dear. How long?"

"Honestly? It started before she was even born." I confessed.

Carlisle looked at me with a mixture of confusion and shock. If I wanted to deny it, I could say that I didn't see won't iota of dissapointment in his face. But I couldn't deny it. I looked back down in shame.

"I honestly don't know what to do Carlisle. I don't want to be this man. This is a typical man! And I don't want to be typical. And your wrong, I'm not strong. I'm not strong at all."

Just then there was a tap at the door. I knew it was Esme before the door even opened.

I won't say anything to Esme, but I do think you should tell her. She feels like a she is your mother, so telling her something like this will make her feel needed. Carlisle thought.

Esme came in, gliding around Carlisle's desk, to give him a kiss on the head. "How are my boys doing?" She seemed chipper and calm. And I was about to destroy that.

"Esme, dear, Edward has something to tell us. I just now heard it myself, but I have yet to hear the details." He glaned my way, and motioned for me to continue.

A look of worry that only a mother could achieve, washed over her and she hurriedly sat next to me on the couch. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and lightly rubbed circles on my back. It was comforting. I really felt like they were my parents, and after all our years together, I really felt like I could talk to them about anything.

"Okay, what I had just told Carlisle, is that I cheated on Bella." I barely peeked up to look at her face. Mostly shock. And thought I knew she loved me, the dissapointment was all over the place with Esme.

Esme was the first to say anything, "With who, dear? Why?"

"Please, please, understand Esme, that I don't feel any better than vile scum right now. I really don't know why I did it. Why I kept doing it. Like I told Carlisle, it started before I even met Bella. Remember when we were in Danali, and how Tanya would always make advances towards me?" Esme hissed as I continued. I knew she didn't like Tanya. She never really did. She just tolerated her.

"Well, I guess I could only say no, so many times. And I ended up sleeping with her."

Esme chimed in, "So you lost your virtue to Tanya?".

"Yes."

Esme gasped and Carlise's eyebrowns furrowed. They automatically thought of Bella. Both of them almost had the same exact thoughts. Both knew that that had meant that Bella wasn't my first, even though everyone, including Bella, had thought that. And then it occurred to Esme, once she thought of my wording when I told them.

"Wait, you said that it started before you met Bella. Are you saying that it's still ongoing?" She looked at me, slightly angered.

I started to panic a little more now. Carlisle was controlled, and seemed to understand, but Esme's thoughts seemed to get more and more uncontrolled.

"Yes, it's still ongoing. Not frequently. Last time was about eight months ago. Give or take a few weeks. Alice knows, of course. She saw it. But she's been keeping this secret for me, so that it doesn't hurt Bella. Alice knows how much I love Bella. And the only reason I kept sleeping with Tanya, is because he knew that I had told Bella that nothing had ever happened between me and her! And now, in order to keep her quiet, I've been sleeping with her here and there." I breathed in deeply, and blew it out hard and quick. I sat there as I let their thoughts go through everything. I wasn't going to reply to any of their questioning. Esme got up, and started pacing back and forth in the room. Carlisle had set back in this chair, tapping his pen, as he tried to think of a way out of this.

"You have to tell her!" Esme had stopped and was looking at me.

"Who? Bella?!" I really started to panic now. I agreed with Esme that I needed to tell Bella. However, just because I would be slightly honest in coming to the truth with her, didn't mean she wouldn't rip my throat out. Literally.

"Yes Bella. As someone who vowed to love her and be honest with her and to care for no one but her, you have to tell her before she actually finds out on her own. If she finds out on her own, it will kill her." Esme was back to pacing the floor again.

"She's right Edward. You do have to tell her. And I can only hope for Esme's sake, you tell her soon. Although we are very thankful that you have enough trust in us to be able to come to us with something like this, it's not fair in the slightest to ask us to keep your secret too." Carlisle had gotten up out of his chair and walked around to sit on the corner of this desk, facing me. "I only think it's fair that you tell Bella immediately. As soon as you can. I don't suggest doing it here, because this is something that the two of you need to deal with together, without outside help. Like I told you before, I believe you both are very strong indviduals, and I think you could get through something like this."

Esme had stopped pacing again and looked sternly at me. Like a mother. "I don't like this Edward. I know that you are not biologically mine, and that by the time I had you, you were seventeen years old for a few years already, but as long as we have been together now, I had hoped that some of our values had gotten through to you. I will not say anything to Bella, but I will be there for her when you do tell her. She's going to need people surrounding her that love her son. This is big. As a female, I can tell you that she is going to be extremely upset about this. Carlisle is right, the sooner you tell her, the better."

"Esme, I think your being a little harsh dear. He feels horrible enough. He doesn't need you drilling into his brain." Esme glared at Carlisle. This was the first time I had ever seen them like that towards each other.

"I love you both, but I have to go check with Alice and Rose to see if they need any help packing. Edward, please take care of things. Carlisle, I'll see you upstairs tonight.", and with that, the door opened and Esme had left. That hadn't sounded like an invite for Carlisle, it had sounded like a threat. He flinched as the door shut behind her, and then sighed, looking at me.

"I'm sorry Carlisle, I didn't mean for anything to happen." I stood up, ready to run away from everything.

Carlisle grabbed my shoulders and shook me until I would look him into the eyes. "Edward, look at me. You are my son. I don't care what anyone says. And when I told you over century before, that I would always be on your side, I meant that. What you did was wrong, yes. But it doesn't mean you don't deserve people in your court, fighting for you too."

I was going to thank him for everything when I heard glass shattering in the living room. As soon as I could blink, I was at Bella's side, panicing that Bella had gotten hurt. I looked her up and down, then realized that Bella had said that game was on, and I immediately looked at Emmett. "What happened?!" I asked.

When I noticed the t.v. busted, I barely listened as Emmett and Bella exchanged words. I could hear Alice upstairs faintly.

Edward, if you are paying attention, or can hear me right now, you have to turn your phone off! Bella is already determined to find out what going on. She thought.

"And what have you been up to?" Bella asked me.

"I hung out with Carlisle and Esme for a little bit, then Alice needed to talk to me." I knew it was possible, but with all the stress from trying to make sure Bella didn't find anything out was eating at my emotions. I tried to keep distance from Jasper, and Alice helped with that often so that we could keep this between me and Alice, at least until I told Bella. "Was Jasper in here at all? I haven't seen him."

"I haven't seen Jasper at all. I feel horribly rude. We got here and I didn't do anything except rush to the couch. I'm sorry. Did I miss anything? What did Alice need?"

That wasn't a question I needed her to ask. Oh how I wish I could just read her mind like everyone else. It would make things so much easier sometimes. "It was nothing. She was wanting my approval on a couple of outfits that she had bought for you. I have to say, she has outdone herself this time. She appealed to how she wants you to dress, to how you like to dress. I think you will like them."

I suddenly recieved one kiss so passionate that it almost made me forget all my issues. With unbelievably horrible timing, my phone vibrated. I tensed a little as Bella looked down between us, and reached for her phone. I knew it was mine. I should have acted like I thought it was hers, but I stopped her hand before she could reach it.

"It's mine, love."

"Well you should answer it then, and tell them they have really, really bad timing." She sounded so seductive at that moment. I almost did what she told me.

"It's probably nothing." I shrugged. I was going to have to talk to Tanya. At the very least she needed to stop calling and texting me all the time. She knows I'm with Bella all the time. What is she trying to do to me?

"Just answer it Edward. Oh, I'm sorry. Is it something I'm not supposed to hear?"

Oh god Bella, just let it go, I thought. Please, something save me. Please, please, please. Then, as if Alice could read my mine, she called for Bella to come upstairs. Thank you, Alice! I thought.

As Bella ran up stairs, I waited until I was sure she couldn't see me and I flipped my phone open quickly.

T: Edward, I'm coming over now. I'll be there in a few minutes.

Dammit. She can't fucking come here! E: No no, do not come here. Everyone is here, including Bella. I'm going to leave the house and go out into the woods, I'll call you when I found a place for us to meet. Do not set foot near this house!

I quickly shoved my phone in my pocket and glided to the door, lightly closing it behind me as I rushed from the house, through the woods.

R/R!