I ran into my dorm room, avoiding people's eyes. Closing my door before sliding down it, I landed with a thud on the ground as I tried to sort out what I was going to do. I didn't want the school to find out about the one place I was safe at, there were very few people I could trust with that secret. Fakir being the few people, but now that Rue knew it would only be a matter of time.
I stood and walked to my bed, pulling back the thick covers, and crawled underneath them. Their warmth enveloped my slender body and I was almost completely asleep when my bedroom door slammed open. My eyes shot open and I fell out of my bed, I looked up too see Fakir with his eyebrow raised at me.
He glared at me until I finally stood and smiled at him, trying to hide that I was upset. It didn't work, "What's wrong with you?" he said simply, leaning against my doorframe. I shrugged; I really didn't want to tell him, it would only cause problem between him and Mythos, "Nothing, y-you just woke me up." I lied hoping he'd buy it. He narrowed his eyes more than usual and sniffed, "You shouldn't lie to me, I always know." He said before closing the door and sitting on one of the chairs I had for when I didn't want to eat in the cafeteria.
I bit my lip, looking everywhere else but at him, "I'm not lying..." I muttered slightly. He glanced at me with a cold stare, "Really? You're not?" I decided I was just going to stay quiet, he knew me a little too well. I went over to my stove and grabbed my kettle, "You want any tea?" I said smiling. He nodded and just watched me as I worked in the kitchen, it was slightly unnerving, but I choked it up to him being irritated that I wouldn't tell him what was going on with Rue and I.
"Duck, we need to talk about this." I turned slightly, "There's nothing to talk about Fakir" he gave me an 'I know you're lying' look, before turning to look outside. Se lived right across from me, so he could probably recognize his balcony from here. I knew I should tell him but I just couldn't. He huffed, irritated and I had a feeling this conversation wasn't going to end well. The kettle whistled, drawing my attention away from him, I pulled it off the stove, retrieved two tea cups from my cupboard and waited for the tea to brew.
Turning away from the counter, only to be placed between it and a few inches away from Fakir, I stared at him, "Tea will be done in a few..." I mumbled. He raised his hand to my chin, looking me in the eye, searching for something. "Why won't you tell me?" I set my eyes downcast, "It'll only make things worse than they already are." He let go of my chin, I glanced at him and he was on his way back to the table. I picked up our tea cups and placed them in front of us as I sat down.
He was upset, and troubled. I felt so responsible, even though I knew it was for the best, it felt wrong to keep something from him. Even though he was upset, he had perfect posture, a characteristic I lacked in ballet. He was so incredible, even though he had his own life to worry about, every once in a while he would suddenly care about her life. Usually he had to have heard from someone else that I was upset, or have seen me upset for him to care at all.
Fakir knew me, better than pretty much anyone in the school. We weren't friends, nor were we enemies. Pique, Lillie, and Mytho all tried to be close with me, but I just don't handle friends well. Neither does Fakir, I think that's why we get along so well when it's just him and I. He had an appearance to keep up of course. I'm sure there would be plenty of gossip already because of him being in my room.
I glanced at him from the edge of my tea cup; he had a perplexed emotion drawn across his face as he gazed out my window. When I turned to look, there was a small sparrow, about the size of my palm, sitting on the edge of my railing. I placed my tea cup down, rose from the chair and walked over to the window. I sat at the edge of it before opening it up to let the sparrow in. It was beautiful, and very petite. I had some bird seed in a jar that I usually fed them every morning in the spring but this little sparrow was staying all year long. It had become practically a pet, I took a handful of seed and let it eat out of my hand before it decided to be brave and step onto my fingers.
I giggled quietly, so I didn't startle it. Fakir had stood and walked near us, he smiled and sat beside me as the little bird ate. We finally drifted into talking about normal topics again. I was so glad when he finally dropped it, but I couldn't help the longing to tell him what was really going on. He had started laughing not long after we started talking about my failures with dance; it made me feel better about not telling him, I just wish I didn't have to hide it from him.
A/N well…This is longer than my others, but it's also a little odd in some places…