Chapter 13 Classes

That night Jeffrey fell asleep early and slept soundly until 3 AM when the pain in his wrist awakened him. He groaned and sat up in bed, unsure where he was.

"Jeff? Wait for me," Bogg said and climbed down quickly. "What's up?" he asked, but he wasn't surprised that Jeff didn't answer. The combination of the medicine, the late hour and the pain had affected him the same way the previous night. He helped Jeff into the bathroom and then gave him another pill and helped him lay down again.

"Bogg?" Jeff asked when he was settled back in bed.

"Yeah?" Bogg whispered.

"Thanks for helping me."

Phineas paused in surprise. Jeff hardly needed to thank him, what else could he have done? "No sweat kid, go back to sleep."

The next morning, Jeff attended the refresher classes with Bogg. Three half-hour sessions before lunch and three after. Phineas was not surprised that Jeff sat in awe and paid strict attention in each class, frequently raising his hand to ask a question. During the last session of the day, they were given a strategy assessment and Phineas laughed when he overheard part of the conversation in Jeff's group. Jeff had been placed with the newer voyagers, and Phineas with the more experienced ones.

"That first question was so easy! I can't believe they even asked it," Ronnie had said. "You're camped on the west side of a city and are going to attack at dawn. From what direction will you attack. Obviously from the west, they told you where you were camped!" He had a condescending tone as he spoke. "I can't believe anyone could get that wrong."

"I think you might have," Jeff had spoken up and from across the room, Phineas had tuned in to the conversation.

"What are you talking about squirt?" Ronnie had said.

Jeff rolled his eyes at the nickname and ignored the nasty tone of it too. "Well, if I was attacking at dawn, I wouldn't attack from the west because the sun would be in my eyes. I'd move around to the east side during the night and attack from there," was Jeff's response. Phineas smiled to himself. He was not surprised that Jeff had reasoned out the correct answer. Unfortunately, Jeff's brilliant response only earned him further insults from Ronnie.

As the last session ended, Ronnie he stood up and forced himself in front of Jeff. "You think you're so smart, just because you voyaged with Phineas Bogg. I still can't believe he'd let himself get saddled with a 12 year old kid."

Jeff heard the words and felt like he'd been transported back to his old bedroom. Those were the same words Aunt Elizabeth had said just before Bogg had landed in his room. He could remember them so clearly, and how they made him feel too. "Do you think I want to be saddled with an 11 year old kid?" she had said. The words reverberated around inside Jeff's head so loudly that he could barely hear what was happening around him.

"Hey," Bogg said loudly as he shoved his way in front of Jeff, facing Ronnie, "back off."

Phineas had seen Jeff's face just before he'd stepped in. The mix of surprise and hurt he saw made him feel terrible.

"I'm not doin anything to him," Ronnie answered. "What do you care anyway, he's nothing to you. I accidentally picked up a kid too, and I dropped him off in an orphanage first chance I got."

"Get out of here Ronnie," Phineas said coldly, and after he left he looked at Jeffrey.

Jeff didn't meet his gaze, instead he looked away and Bogg knew he'd been hurt by what Ronnie had said. He put his hand on Jeff's shoulder, "come on," he said as he ushered him toward the door.

Once out in the hall, Bogg motioned to a closed door across the hall and they went into an empty classroom. "Sit," Bogg instructed Jeff and then sat down in a chair beside him. "He never should've said that, he was out of line," Bogg said, then waited.

"It's fine," Jeff answered, not meeting his partner's gaze.

"I don't think so," was the quiet reply.

Jeff swallowed, "really, it's okay."

Phineas paused and continued, "you're gonna have to do better than that, because I'm not leaving until you tell me why you're so upset."

"I'm not upset," but Jeff's voice gave him away.

"Humph," Bogg murmured, and continued to sit quietly.

Jeff shrugged and tried to wipe his eyes without Bogg seeing. "It's no big deal, he didn't know what he said," he began.

Phineas continued to wait.

Jeff sighed, "when I was back in my room, just before you came, I overheard my Aunt Elizabeth and Tom arguing. Tom said he didn't want me ruining their trip to Cancun. Aunt Elizabeth said she wanted to leave me somewhere but didn't know where, and then she said 'do you think I like being saddled with an 11 year old kid?" Jeff stopped, embarrassed to admit that he hadn't been wanted. "It's just... Ronnie used those same words about you, and, I just thought...," here Jeff stopped and blinked hard to keep from crying.

Bogg's heart felt heavy as he heard Jeff's emotional admission. How must it have felt to have lost both your parents in such a senseless tragedy, and then be forced to live with an uncaring relative? No wonder he'd never talked about her before.

After a moment, Jeff gave a slight shrug. "Now that we're back at headquarters, it's okay for you to feel different about me, I mean, one of the first things you ever said to me was 'I work alone.'"

Phineas stared at him in shock. How could Jeff not know how he felt about him? He moved to a kneeling position in front of Jeffrey and reached up and pulled his head around so they were looking at each other. "Listen to me," he began softly, "being here doesn't change anything about us, okay?" He paused, "but you can't expect these people to understand. Heck, I wouldn't have believed it a year ago and it happened to me."

"Understand what?"

"These are young guys Jeff, looking for excitement, they don't have any attachments and they like it that way. I was just like them. They just can't understand how I could care about you so much."

"Ronnie picked up a kid too, only he left him in an orphanage," Jeff said shivering.

"He made the decision he was trained to make. No thought involved. If you accidentally pick up a civilian, you put them back as close as you can to their own time, or bring them to headquarters so their memory can be modified, and then get on with business. It's in the Code. They can't understand why I would ris..." Phineas paused awkwardly, "why I would... keep you with me."

Jeff sat up straight and turned toward Bogg, "Are you in trouble for keeping me?"

"Nah," Bogg answered, but thought to himself, 'not yet anyway'.

"They said I'd been voyaging illegally," Jeff continued.

Bogg paused, then changed the subject. "Here's what you need to know, we're a family. You're my guidebook after all."

"Don't lie to me," Jeff said with an edge to his voice.

"I'm not lying," Phineas said with surprise.

"Now that you're here, I know you could get a new guidebook." Jeff swallowed hard, then continued, "You don't need me at all," he ended in a whisper.

Bogg's eyes opened wide and his mouth hung open. How could Jeff possibly think such a thing? Especially after all they'd been through? Was it really possible that Jeff didn't know how he felt about him? He had never been good at talking about his feelings, but he'd thought that he had shown Jeff in so many ways how he felt. As he sat staring at his partner he forced himself to see things from Jeff's point of view. He really was a kid, after all. After living with an aunt who didn't want him, he'd been picked up by Phineas and dragged back and forth through the cosmos, and Bogg couldn't ever remember telling him how much he cared. Sure, they had become close, but now back at headquarters, with Ronnie using the same words to describe him that his aunt had used, the emotions had gotten mixed up. Now that they were back here, on Bogg's home turf, he couldn't blame Jeffrey at all for feeling uncertain about their relationship. Suddenly he made a decision. There was too much riding on this not to be completely honest with Jeff. Besides, it was killing Phineas inside to see Jeffrey so upset. These thoughts took only a few seconds to fly through Bogg's brain.

"Being my guidebook is just extra you know," he began.

Jeff looked at him, "what'd'ya mean, extra?" he asked.

"It's like a bonus that I get, because you're you and so smart. It doesn't have anything to do with the truth, not really."

"What truth?"

Phineas realized he had to finally say it out loud. "The truth is that you are my family. I know I'm not very good at talking about my feelings, but I love you," he paused, "very much. That's really what the guys can't understand."

Bogg reached up and brushed a stray curl away from Jeff's eyes. "I love you, and if you think I feel the same way as your aunt, then I haven't done a very good job communicating that and I'm sorry."

Jeff felt the gentle touch on his forehead and looked into Bogg's eyes. He put his arms around him and leaned against his shoulder sobbing. As he cried, he felt Bogg's arms come around him. The hurt he'd carried with him from his aunt's neglect finally disappeared. Bogg did love him after all. He guessed that he knew it all along, but still it felt so good to hear it spoken.

They stayed that way for several minutes until Jeffrey straightened up again and took a deep breath and smiled. "So what do we do now?" he asked in his normal voice.

Phineas smiled back, "well, I'm ready for supper."

Jeff nodded and they went back into the cafeteria.