Wow, thanks everybody. Your responses were much better that chapter than the rest. I woke up that morning after I posted the chapter to check my phone and find 7 reviews and heaps of other alerts. But you guys can do better, I sounds like you want me to turn the Cullen men gay D: I was going to get this out earlier but I decided I didn't like the way I wrote it because it reminded me too much of Breaking Dawn cos she was so normal and such and I wanted her to feel a bit of pain. And in response to everyone, yes eventually Edward and Alice will get their butts kicked. (:

Oh BTW 45th reviewer gets to know what Bellas' awesome power is. My beta and I came down to 2 ideas and I have decided on the one I came up with recently. I hope it isn't too far fetchy but I like it. And its not a sheid :)

Chapter 6

I'll find repose in new ways
Though I haven't slept in two days
'Cause cold nostalgia
Chills me to the bone

But drenched in vanilla twilight
I'll sit on the front porch all night
Waist-deep in thought because
When I think of you I don't feel so alone

Who knew there was some many colours? I for one didnt.

I looked into the air and was more amazed than I had ever been in my life. I could see everything, and when I say everything I mean everything.
I saw every particle of dust, every ray of light, I could even see shimmer of movements.

Not only that I could hear everything for miles. I could even hear Ms. Cope at the high school telling a student that they shouldnt have eaten so many chocolates. I was completely baffled, this was so disorienting. I never knew there was so many things to be observed. I took an unnecessary intake of air and was met by a burning sensation in the back of my throat and my breathing hitched.

What was that?!

It smelled so good but I knew it was wrong, this had to be human blood. I flipped off the makeshift bed and cornered myself in the corner, not the wisest move. All of the Cullens' were in front of me in a semicircle, Jasper flanked with Carlise and Emmett on his sides, then closest to me on either sides were Rose and Esme. Obviously I had scared them.

I closed my eyes and practised some of the breathing techniques I had learnt in the past month whenever I thought of them. I clenched and released my fists and opened my eyes. They were all looking at me with a sense of worry, oh right they were expecting me to fight. Wait, why wasn't I a crazed newborn. I mean my throat was burning worse than a dust storm in Texas but it was fine, uncomfortable but I was dealing. Maybe this way my power? I mean that's okay but come on, that so lame.

I opened my mouth to say something but had to close it again because of the warm salty air that entered it. It was familar, and recent. That must have meant the Cullens' had another human here. I breathed in slowly through my nose so I could try to remember the scent. Coconut, vanilla and cinnamon were dominant but I swear I could smell strawberries and freesia faintly. It was really familiar but I couldnt place it so I shrugged it off and absent mindely ran my fingers through my hair and a wave of coconut washed over me. The human scent was me, I gasped to myself.

I tried to remember what had happened before I was changed, but it hurt me more than any physical pain could. I had died. Charlie was dead. How did this happen? Who did this? Why?! Before I knew it I had let out a high pitched yell sending the house into tremors. I pressed my fists to my eyes and pressed them in, sliding against the wall and sitting on the ground in a ball. I couldn't handle this.

I had been killed my former boyfriend, that I could handle. But my father, not so much. I felt my chest cave in with unshed tears that wouldnt come.
I hadn't realised it but I started screaming again with my body shaking. I suddenly felt calm and looked up through shimmering eyes at Jasper, he was using his power on me. Even though it felt intrusive I allowed it, it was much better than being screaming.

"Thanks," I whispered knowing theyd hear. I looked at my family expecting anger but saw nothing but sadness and acceptance. I relaxed the death grip I had my legs and started to lift myself off the ground slow for a vampire. I leant against the wall harder feeling a small crack then stopped leaning.
"Sorry," I said to Esme.

I started to realise how uncomfortable it was standing there, I didnt know why though. I took an unnecessary breath and realised why I was uncomfortable. There was a tingling burn still dominant at the back of my throat reminding me that I still needed to hunt. But I felt a more important urge for answers.
"How long have I been... asleep?" Everyone looked at each other then, not wanting to answer my question. "How long?" I asked again.
"Two days," Rosalie replied looking away.

"Why is that bad or something?" I asked clearly confused. "Most newborns are burning for three or more days, two days is rare but what I was just was considering was that maybe your not reacting to being a newborn because you didn't spend as long burning so you haven't gotten used to the idea of wanting human blood," Jasper thought to himself more at the end. I thought that this was okay explanation but I needed more.

"But why did I only burn for two days?" I questioned to noone in particular. "Bella, do you remember anything from how you were turned?" Carlise asked looking pained. I quickly got a flash of myself being thrown against a tree with a sickening crack. "Bits and pieces," I lied. Noone really looked like they believed me but they let it go.

"If you hadnt been going to get turned you wouldve been beyond repair, we werent even sure that you'd come out right.." Carlise spoke quietly.
Did I come out wrong, is that why I don't react to blood badly. Was I a normal vampire at all? "Your body didn't even look like you, most of your bones were broken and there was alot of internal bleeding. And that was after hours -" "That's enough Carlise," Esme cut off Carlise seeing my expression. "Well my theory is that the venom was working so hard to fix your body that it forgot about something of being a vampire- bloodlust,"
he explained with more caution.

"So I came back wrong?" I asked a little terrified. "No, of course not dear. Just different," Esme said quickly trying to ease my distress but saw that it wasnt entirely working backtracked. "There's nothing wrong with being different Bella, and remember its just a theory. It's not set in stone,"
she added trailing off at the quote she had picked up that left us all feeling miserable.

We stood there for a good ten minutes before anyone spoke. "Charlie," thats all I needed to say before I felt arms around me. I slowly put my arms around their body and clung like my life depended on it, which in a way it did. "Bella, we should sit down," I heard Rose whisper in my ear. I nodded my reply and followed her to the couch where I curled up into another ball.

"There's no easy way to say it Bella, but your father was murdered while he was working. No one saw it happen but apparently he was shot with his own gun, but we have suspicions of something else," Carlise explained. I nodded slowly taking it all in but not really comprehending it.
It didn't really matter anyway, the Cullens' were all I had left now.

I leaned back into the white leather sofa and closed my eyes, "I need to hunt," I said more as a declaration than a question. I rose quickly knowing someone would follow and left out the back door. I ran across the lawn and leaped over the river surrounding the house and ran into the forrest not looking behind.

I finally understood now how vampires always said that running was like a second nature to them, it was just so carefree. I ran untill I found a pretty sucluded path and sat down on a recently fallen tree and placed my head into my hands and thought of what life had become. I knew whoever followed me would give me a little space for me to recollect my thoughts before we went to hunt. I quickly wondered who would have followed me, probably Rose. Just because we were close.

While thinking I realised that thanks to me Charlie was dead. If it hadnt been my depression he never would have to had to leave the house so he wouldnt see me on the brink of insanity, he would still be here today. Alive.

Before I knew what I was doing I uprooted a tree and threw it across the cleared path and knew why the tree I had just been sitting on had been uprooted. Just two days ago this is where Edward killed me. I screamed outt in pain for my loss, of life and my father. So much had changed in the short time I had moved to Forks. Too much perhaps.

I was still fuming when I felt a wave of calm envelope me. "Hello Jasper," I said with sumbission while kicking a medium sized rock with my foot.
"Hey Bella," he spoke quietly, clearly he felt this wasnt his place. He walked over and sat on the uprooted tree and patted the space near him. I hesitantly went and sat next to him and turned my body to face him.

"So are we going to have like a Yoda to Luke moment?" I said as a feeble attempt to sound happy. He gave a slight chuckle and then sighed deeply. "You miss Alice," I accused. He gave a small smile. "You miss Edward," he countered. "Yes and No," I replied. "I mean, how can I. He killed me. Mentally and physically. But on the other hand, he was my first love.''

He nodded at that, and got up again and paced the clearing quickly. He came back to me quickly and kneeled on the moist ground. "What would you like to hunt?" he asked randomly. I laughed at that and didn't know what to think. "Just something so this... burning isn't so uncomfortable," I grinned. He was deep and thought and started to slowly walk away. "Are you coming or not?" he said jokingly. I shook my head and followed after him into the woods.

He led the way mostly but there were times when I used my newborn speed to overtake him. It felt good to just let everything fly behind me like an imaginary cape. Let all my worries fly away, I grinned at that thought. I heard Jasper slow down behind me so I followed suit. He held a hand out as a gesture to stop and listen. I closed my eyes and heard the soft thrumming of a tiny heart and the flow of blood circulate the body.

Could I really kill an animal? "Would you rather kill a human?" Jasper said softly, he must have felt my uncertanity. His words were true enough but it still felt odd. "Do you know what you are hearing?" he asked quietly. God, how would I know? "Well, its soft and small sounding. So maybe a deer or something?" I said hopefully. Jasper chuckled to himself, "your are right, but smell it and recognise the smell for future times."

I breathed through my nose and went rigid. It smelt like freshly cut grass and huckleberries. It smelt good, but not great. But hell, if it sustained the pain. Sure I could drain a deer. I then realised I had no idea how to. "Umm, Jasper. How do I eat it?" I asked feeling foolish. He gave a short small laugh. "It's hard to explain, but the simpliest way to put it is to follow your instincts. Let the inner animal in you take over."

I nodded shortly at that, and started to walk forward. I closed my eyes slowly and drifted forward and unknowingly walked through the trees. I knew I was getting closer to the deer that was nearby because the burning in my throat became much more known. I became so close to the deer that I didnt realise it when I leaped at it and sunk my teeth into the first bit of warm flesh my teeth came into contact with. I drank eagerly and before I knew it had drained it in a few minutes.

I got up slowly and noticed Jasper leaning against the trees with his arms crossed with a smug look on his face. "Well, thats embarrassing," I said after a minute. "Bet I looked absolutely clueless and messy," I chuckled. "Well, it wasnt that bad Bella, but practice makes perfect," he said with a wide grin. The first I had seen since Alice and Edward left. "Your probably still hungry, so lets look for some more deer, just keep it small for your first trip," he concluded before gesturing for me to follow him.

We worked like this for a couple hours until both of us were satisfied. We walked out of the forrest laughing and joking like old friends and entered the house, then I was overwhelmed by the misery lurking behind every shadow. Memories of Edward and Alice were everywhere, not just in mine and Jaspers faces but the grand piano, Alices' sketch pad the list goes on. It was evident that Alice and Edward were key pieces in the family, that everyone circled them.

I sighed deeply and felt a hand give a squeeze to mine, I looked up at Jasper who didn't need his powers to make me feel better. Just having him understand and being close to going through what I was, was good enough. "Thanks Jasper," I said. "For what?" he asked.

"Understanding."

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