Men don't pine

A/N: Hey guys! This is my first ever CM fanfic... I hope it's ok. It's not beta'ed so all the misstakes are on me... Oh, and this is supposed to take place around mid-season 4

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds, if I did there'd be shirtless Fridays at the BAU...

Chapter one

Aaron Hotchner was sitting at his desk. His eyes turned towards the open door where his colleague had stood just moments before. The words of David Rossi echoing in his mind.

"Aaron you're not as discreet as you might think. Don't think I haven't noticed you making googly eyes at her. Do yourself a favor and stop pining for her and do something about it!"

But Rossi is wrong. He isn't pining. He is after all not a 14 year old girl. He's a hard-assed, gun-carrying, suit-wearing FBI agent. And hard-assed, gun-carrying, suit-wearing FBI agents do not pine.

But you do like her. A smug voice in the back of his mind, sounding an awful lot like Rossi, told him.

Well...he had to admit that. He had admitted that actually. About four months ago he had realized that he is attracted to one of his subordinates. But that is so out of character for him that he tried denying it. He really did. But then came what he was now referring to as "the purple sweater day".

*** flash back ***

That day started out just like any other day. He arrived at the office early. He was always there before anyone else. Well, sometimes Emily would be there early too but not that day. He did some paperwork, signed off on a couple of files and then JJ came to show him the case they were presenting to the team that morning. Police in California needed a consult on a case with two missing women. He put his paperwork away and closed the door to his office. He looked down into the bullpen as he made his way to the conference room noticing that the rest of the team already was sitting round the table except for JJ who was standing next to the whiteboard.

He sat down in the empty seat between Emily and Reid where he always sat and something in the corner of his eye caught his attention.

Breasts!

And not just any breasts...Emily's breasts covered by a dark purple sweater. A dark purple sweater that was hugging Emily's curves in a very distracting way. And just that hint of cleavage showing in the deep V neckline. And it was just too tight. He was sure he could make out the pattern of her bra and it was doing funny things to him. He could feel butterflies in his stomach and a warm tingly sensation a little south of his bellybutton. It took him all of his willpower just to drag his eyes from those purple clad breasts.

After the briefing he had hurried back to his office and closed the door behind him. The rest of the team had probably thought that he was in a bad mood or something because they had stayed well away the rest of the day. And that was fine with him because he was not up for being social and had made a great effort to avoid everyone, especially Emily, the rest of the day.

***

He was pretty sure that nobody had noticed his brief wandering eyes. After all who is better at keeping a straight face than SSA Aaron Hotchner? Nobody, that's who!

And he had tried really hard not to let his eyes go down that road (the one that leads down Emily's blouse) again. So he was rather confident that nobody suspected that he had any other feelings than strictly professional ones for her.

But after that incident he had to admit to himself that he's attracted to Emily Prentiss... his subordinate. God, if Strauss ever found out it would definitely be the end of him. They would use him as an example at the sexual harassment seminars.

But he couldn't help himself. After his realization he found himself more and more just sitting and staring at her through the blinds. And whenever she smiled her radiant smile he could feel his own dimples wanting to make an appearance. He would start teaming himself up with her more often and he would sit next to her on the plane. He just wanted to be near her. Nothing was more comforting to him than her scent. That girly yet oh so sexy combination of vanilla and coconut.

Then one morning maybe two months ago he had woken up feeling really content. He briefly wondered why he felt like he had had the best night in ages and then it started coming back to him.

The dream he had just had. He remembered silky pale skin and dark eyes and red lips. And those soft full lips pressed hard against his. And her lying under him...

And that was when he had realized it. That was what made him know for sure. Aaron Hotchner has feelings deeper than just friendship for Emily Prentiss.

Plus he also really wants to see her naked.

***

Emily Prentiss was sitting at her desk writing down her account of their latest take down. It was late and she was getting tired. But she wanted to get this done. Nothing is less fun than having to come in early to do paperwork. Even if coming in early most of the time meant being in the office alone with Hotch. But then again Hotch rarely hangs out in the bullpen. He's usually locked up in his own office doing his own paperwork.

And lately he had been hiding away in his office a lot more. And he had been acting really strange a couple of times. She was really confused. Or maybe she wasn't... shecould think of a couple of reasons why he'd been acting strange. But she didn't want to get her hopes up...

But just a few months earlier she had caught him checking her boobs out. He didn't know that she had caught him because... well because he was busy looking somewhere else (down her shirt!) and it's not like she was going to tell her boss, her very attractive boss, to stop ogling her chest. That would have been really awkward...

But she still wasn't in any way shape or form sure that he'd done it because he was attracted to her.

Oh, God... maybe he had figured her out... and he was avoiding her because he didn't want things to be awkward between them. Or he was trying to find a way to let her down gently. Oh please God don't let it be that...

After all after the boob staring incident she had never caught him looking at her that way again. So she really wasn't sure whether she should chalk that incident up to him just being a guy who maybe was feeling a little lonely and who had caught sight of some breasts. Or if it was that he had caught sight of her breasts.

But then again when she thought about it there was one more incident a couple of months later. It was nothing like the boob staring incident but it still was a little strange.

It was one of the very few, like "able to count them on the one hand" few, occasions that she had been at the office earlier than Hotch. She had had a pile of paperwork doing its very best impression of Mount Everest to do and if she didn't want to sit there the whole weekend she had to come in at 6.30 am to get it done.

At around 7.30 Hotch showed up looking not quite as well put together as usual. He wasn't looking at her and she was pretty sure he didn't know that she was there. That suspicion was confirmed when she said "Hey, Hotch" and he startled, stopped and looked wide eyed in her direction. She gave a little wave but he didn't seem to notice. His eyes kind of glazed over and he just stood there. For probably a good 30 seconds. Then he just snapped out of it and his face turned beet red and before Emily had a chance to ask what all that was about he mumbled a "Good Morning, Prentiss" and scrambled up to his office. The next time she saw him was at the briefing and by then he was back to being stoic SSA Hotchner so she just shrugged off his strange behavior and assumed he had just been surprised that someone was at the office earlier than him. It really did not happen often...

***

Hotch was still sitting at his desk thinking about Dave's words and about Emily. And that purple sweater. As he was doing that he got an overwhelming feeling that he just had to look at her. He knew that she was still at her desk out in the bullpen. She was usually one of the last to leave. And she hadn't been by to say good night so he was convinced that she was out there. He slowly walked up to the window not wanting to be seen by someone. Especially not by Emily...

There she was. Sitting by her desk her head bent down. Her dark hair fanned out over her shoulders. The white shirt she was wearing in stark contrast to her raven locks. Then she raised her head. Stretching her slender neck first to the right then to the left. He started feeling that by now all too familiar warm feeling in his stomach. Then Emily turned her head and looked right at him. Apparently he was not as well covered as he had thought because a smile spread across her lips when her eyes met his and she gave him a little wave. He gave her a small wave back.

Crap! Way to go Aaron! What will she think now? She's going to think I was staring at her... which I kind of was... but she does not need to know that. I'm her boss... Bosses should not stare at their subordinates. Bosses should not have those kind of thoughts about their subordinates. It's as easy at that.

He felt his cheeks grow warm and he knew that by now they would be a nice shade of candy apple red. Just like they had been that morning two months ago when he had found her sitting alone in the bullpen at 7.30 in the morning. The one morning he was a little later than usual she had to be there earlier than she usually would. The morning he had woken up feeling really content. The morning after his first ever sex dream about a colleague. The morning after his dream about Emily in nothing but lacy red underwear.

* * * flash back* * *

That morning two months ago he woke up feeling really good about himself. And feeling a little tense also... down there... Then pictures came flooding back. Emily laying on his bed in nothing but a lacy red bra and panties. Him removing said bra and running his hands down her silky stomach and down the inside of her thighs. Her soft red lips pressed against his chapped ones. Her body pressed hard against his. Her hands in his hair. His hands on her breasts.

After that he had to bolt into the bathroom and take a long cold shower. That was why he was at the office a tad later than usual. He usually took an efficient 5 minute shower. This shower somehow went on for almost half an hour. Until he was completely sure that all urges was sufficiently drowned in the cold water.

He still got to the office pretty early and was more or less certain that he would be the only one there. So when he heard Emily's voice saying "Hey, Hotch" he was completely taken aback. He stopped dead in his tracks and slowly turned his eyes towards her desk. She was sitting there pen in hand and smiling at him.

And just like that all of the urges he thought he had drowned came crashing back. And thoughts of naked Emily came whirling back into his mind. And all of a sudden Emily was sitting by her desk wearing nothing but those red lacy panties... just like in his dream. She was smiling alluringly at him and looking at him under heavy lids. Her mouth formed the words "come here" and he almost started walking towards her but stopped himself.

Wait a minute now Aaron... his rational mind caught his attention.

This isn't real. This is a figment of your imagination. Emily is most certainly NOT sitting naked in the middle of the bullpen. You, Aaron, are dreaming again.

He snapped to, realizing that he probably had been standing there for...

God, he had no idea how long he had been standing there just looking at her like a fool. It could have been several minutes.

He felt his cheeks growing hot and he quickly managed a quiet "Good morning, Prentiss." Using her last name to try and seem a little less suspicious. He did not fool himself into thinking that it would work. He realized that he was not looking his best. So with the speed of an Olympic sprinter he made his way up to his office and did not come out again until the briefing two hours later. His trade marked SSA Hotchner mask back in place after a lot of hard work.

***

Now when she was looking at him that same feeling came back. His cheeks grew warm again. The butterflies came back. And into his mind came the picture of her in that lacy underwear.

I'm going to go crazy if this is going to happen every time I see her. Maybe Dave really is right (urrgh what a horrible thought). Maybe I am pining...

He sat back down at his desk putting his head between his palms and taking a deep breath.

I'm attracted to Emily Prentiss. I have feelings for her. And even if she does not feel the same way I have to tell her. Or someone will have to come with a straightjacket and take me to a nice padded room.

He looked out his window again. Still at her desk.

I have to tell her... The only question is... How?

A/N: Tell me what you think! Pretty please with a cherry on top...