A/N: Thank you so much for reading and all the lovely reviews! You guys are great! I had no idea that reviews would be so addictive...
Okay so here's Chapter 2. Enjoy!
Chapter 2
Hotch walked through the glass doors and into the bullpen and took a look around. He was the first one there. Of course. But he was in exceptionally early. He hadn't gotten much sleep last night. His decision lingering in his mind mixing with naughty dreams of Emily. So he decided to go to the office and see if maybe he could get his thoughts together there. And maybe get some paperwork done at the same time...
He had to find a way to tell Emily that he's in love with her. But he, the tough-as-nails FBI agent who has stood face to face with deranged serial killers without flinching, was scared. He was scared shitless. He was scared of telling a girl how he felt. It was over twenty years since he had done it the last time and he wasn't sure if he still knew how. And he was definitely not sure how she would react. What if she laughed... thought he was joking.
No... he had to suck it up. He had to do this. He had the possibility of happiness right in front of him and he wasn't going to fuck it up this time. He was going to tell her and just hope for the best. Hope that she felt the same way.
Now he just had to figure out what to do and what to say. He had actually been quite romantic when he was younger. He did after all join the drama club in high school just to get to meet Haley. And in the first half of their marriage he was still really good at doing small romantic gestures like leaving little notes and buying flowers "just because". That romance left his marriage a few years before his wife left him. And after that he had thought he would never have the need to be romantic again so he just buried that part of him. But now he needed that part, the Aaron part, again and he was really afraid that he wouldn't be able to find him. But he had to. For Emily. She deserves something great. He can't just call her up to his office and blurt out "I love you". It has to be something special.
He knew what his body, well certain parts of it anyway, wanted to do. He had dreamed about it more than once. In those dreams he pulled her into a supply closet and tore her clothes away and ravaged her. The cave man in him really wanted to do just that. Drag her with him to some secluded area and push her against a wall. Then he would make her scream his name. Over and over and over again.
But he was not delusional. He knew that dragging her into a supply closet would not help his case. It would not get him what he wanted. The only thing that would get him would be a slap in the face and perhaps a swift knee to the groin. And that was not what he wanted.
* * *
Emily was as usual one of the first to arrive in the morning. She glanced up at Hotch's office like she always did. The lights were on but the door was firmly closed. That meant that he was there but that he didn't want to be disturbed. Poor Reid had made the mistake of walking straight into Hotch's office without knocking when the door was closed once. He had been lost in thought and just kind of wandered in not really thinking about where he was going. That had earned him one of Hotch's talks. The talks generally comprised of you sitting in the visitor's chair by his desk and him telling you how disappointed he was. So far Reid and Morgan had had the most talks. Morgan usually after taking down a dangerous unsub by himself and Reid usually after setting small fires during some kind of physics magic. She had only been in that chair for a talk once but what a talk that had been. But she didn't think about that anymore. That was behind them. It's hard holding a grudge when you feel about someone the way she feels about Hotch.
Just thinking about him made her tingle. His piercing dark eyes and strong jaw. Oh! And those cheekbones... and the dimples! She melted every time she saw those dimples, which granted wasn't very often. If she had any say those sexy as hell dimples would come out a lot more often.
She could only imagine what he had hidden under his regulation blue suit. But she would bet every thing she had on that it would make her weak at the knees. On especially complicated cases or when they had a case somewhere warm he'd sometimes take his suit jacket off and roll up the sleeves of his dress shirt. Once she had been sitting right next to him when he had rolled his sleeves up and she had caught sight of his bicep flexing under the white fabric of his shirt. And from that she could tell that he was in very good shape.
She had had several vivid dreams where the suit and dress shirt would just melt away revealing strong arms and flat abs. God how she wanted to put her hands on those abs. And her lips... Mmmmm...
"Hey, Princess! How far away are you? Whatever you are thinking about must be very nice judging from that smile... Or maybe you're thinking about someone..."
Emily was rudely pulled from her daydream about Hotch's naked body. She turned around to glare at Morgan.
"For your information this smile is a result of me figuring out how to pawn off more paperwork on you." She lied... "Just you wait Derek Morgan... you won't see it coming but I promise you that pile of files will grow."
She got up, shot him another glare and stalked off to the kitchenette to get her second cup of coffee that morning.
***
All morning Hotch had been alone in his office. But he hadn't gotten very much work done. He just couldn't concentrate. After thinking about how he was going to tell Emily that he's in love with her for maybe an hour he gave up. He couldn't think of any clever way of telling her. So he figured he'd do some paperwork and then come back to it later and had opened a file.
Half an hour later Hotch's eyes were still fixed on that same file but he wasn't reading it. In his mind Emily was still very present. In this particular fantasy she was sitting on his desk in that curve hugging dress she wore when she had to seduce Viper (God, he had hated that idea). She was pulling him towards her and her lips were on his neck and her hands...
Stop it Hotchner! He thought to himself.
He shook his head trying to rid himself of the thought of Emily's hands on his body.
Okay I have to stop doing this... I have to stop the fantasizing and do something about it. I will never get any work done again if I don't. I have to decide on something now.
Hotch really tried to think of some wonderful way of telling Emily about his feelings. He really did... but so far he had nothing.
He had thought of sending her flowers – To ordinary. Emily isn't ordinary so this shouldn't be either.
He had thought of writing her a letter and leaving it on her desk – To impersonal. She deserves to be told in person.
He had thought of buying her jewellery – He'd certainly do that at some point but this was not that time.
He had thought of staging a romantic scavenger hunt – Who was he kidding? He'd never be able to do something like that.
He had even toyed with the idea of a song-o-gram – Come on! He must be really desperate...
He was screwed. He'd never be able to think of something himself. He needed help. But who could he ask?
He was sure that Garcia would be able to think of something quirky and fun to do... but he had no interest in the entire BAU finding out about what he was up to and Garcia couldn't keep such a secret to save her life.
JJ would probably also come up with something sweet and romantic. But would she be able to not hint something about it to Emily? Probably not, if he knew one thing about women it's that they talk to each other.
Morgan would surely be in favour of the "grab her and drag her into the supply closet" method. And that he had already dismissed.
If he tried asking Reid the young genius would probably splutter some statistics on courtship rituals before blushing profusely and stumbling off.
No, he would have to go to the one person who already knew of his predicament. He'd have to go to the thrice married reason behind most of the fraternization rules. He would have to go to David Rossi for advice on women.
But hey, he would have had to have done something to get those three women to marry him. Maybe he had some great examples of grand romantic gestures to share... Then again maybe not... But desperate times...
***
The briefing went by in a haze. Luckily there was no case that needed their involvement at the site. There were a couple precincts that needed consults and he divided them between Morgan, Reid and Emily. The three of them went out into the bullpen to work on their respective consult, JJ went back to her office and left Hotch alone with Rossi in the conference room.
"Dave..." Hotch started tentatively.
"Yeah, Aaron?" Dave turned to look at him.
"Dave, I need your help with something. Something delicate. Something that will have to stay between the two of us..."
"Let me guess..." Dave cut him off. "You want me to help you tell Prentiss how you feel? Hell, I'll go and tell her right now if that's what you want. No need for beating around the bush. Don't you think?"
That made Hotch rush to stand between Dave and the door.
"That wasn't really what I had in mind, Dave." Hotch told him regaining his calm. "Emily is a fantastic woman. She deserves something amazing. It's just been so long since I did something romantic that I can't seem to remember how to do it anymore."
A smile spread across Rossi's lips.
"Don't you worry, Aaron. Let me think about this a little and let's see if I can't think of something. After all it was only wife number three that married me for my name. The first two I actually had to wine and dine and all that crap."
"Wow, that sounds reassuring Dave." Hotch crooked his lips in a tight smile, a dimple almost appearing. "But I guess that I have no other choice... I am after all a very desperate man."
***
Sitting at her desk Emily was really trying to concentrate on the case in front of her but she was finding it incredibly hard to focus on the task at hand. She was thinking about Hotch. She still had a feeling that something was off with him. And the last few days that feeling had become more intense. He was acting strange. But not with everyone. Just around her. He wasn't looking at her. At the briefing he had been standing instead of sitting in the chair he always sat in. The one next to her. And he was becoming more and more of a hermit. He was always in locked up in his office... Okay maybe that wasn't any unusual behaviour. But usually he'd come out to get coffee. Usually around the same time as her. But now he seemed to be using the coffee maker in his office.
She just had to admit it to herself now. He knows. He knows all about her feelings. He knows she's in love with him and he's trying to send a message. He's not interested. Thanks, but no thanks.
She turned and looked towards his office. The lights were off. She turned towards the conference room instead. There he was. With Dave. It didn't look like they were discussing a case. Dave was smiling and Hotch was looking a little flustered.
Oh no. He's told Dave and now he's helping Hotch figure out a way to let me down easy.
Rossi has clusters of women all throwing themselves at him so he must have some experience letting women down. There was no doubt in her mind that he also had plenty of experience happily accepting what they offered, but he was only one man and couldn't possibly make time for all of them.
No, that was what they were doing. They were coming up with a way for Hotch to tell her that he knew how she felt, knew that she wanted him. He just didn't want her back.
A/N: Please let me know what you think! Pretty please with Hotch on top...