Opening A/N: I'm not a big Joe fan so getting into his head was a little weird for me. I really liked how this one turned out though.
It's Just a One Shot Away
Stephanie Induced Symptoms
One for the Money reference: "Across the street, a shadowy figure pulled back from a filthy third-floor window, the movement catching my attention. Someone had been watching me." -Chapter 3
One of the Furry Ones reference: "I glanced over my shoulder and noticed a vehicle parked down the street some. The driver appeared to be watching me, which was a little bit creepy. I wrote it off as someone waiting for a special Stark Street service." -Chapter 5
Joe POV:
Joseph, I just got off the phone with Stephanie Plum's mother.
It had been a long time since I'd last heard her say those words but they still had the same effect on me then as they did now; stomach cramping, a sharp pain behind my eye, an urge to throw myself off a bridge... Stephanie Plum, and her whole crazy ass family, always had a way of bringing out the worst in me. Her reappearance back in my life should have sent me running far, far away in the other direction and yet here I was following her...again.
I'd yet to see her make any progress in finding me, unless TastyKakes had fortunes in them now. It had always amazed me that a human being could pack away so many doughnuts, processed snack foods and whatever the hell else she ate and still look like she did, long shapely legs and perfect ass. No ass and legs were worth all the trouble Stephanie put me through though. I'd never had to follow another woman to make sure she didn't ship me off to jail and my probable death. Only Stephanie.
I hung back as she parked on Stark Street and groaned when I saw what business she'd parked across from. She had to be insane, that was the only explanation. I drove past her and parked on the same side of the street she had. I optimistically left the car idling, hoping that Plum would grow some common sense and get back into her car. I opened the glove box and pulled out a pair of pocket binoculars without taking my eyes off her. She was still hovering by the door.
I put the binoculars up to my eyes and looked directly into her face staring back at me. I nearly shrank down in my seat. Sure, she'd spotted me but there was no way in hell that she actually knew it was me. I'd been careful about switching cars. And even I knew it was stupid to be following my own bounty hunter around, no matter now inexperienced she was. The situation was too idiotic to guess.
I watched her turn back to the door, dismissing me. Like a fool, she pulled the door open and stepped inside. And just like her, I opened the glove box again to get my gun...just in case she needed saving.