Scarlett made her way downstairs just in time for their evening meal. She was quiet all through supper, barely speaking with the children and not so much as looking Rhett's way. He tried to keep the children entertained, reverting to old ways from the days when the two did everything possible to appear a happy couple and ignore one another at the same time. Inside, it was breaking him.
Finally, the meal was over and the children excused. Scarlett moved to the parlor and Rhett followed, hoping to find a way to undo the damage he had done. He watched her as she settled on the settee looking forlornly out of the window. He moved to a nearby chair and sat down, pulling out a cigar while watching her stealthily. Her sadness griped his heart. "If it is any help at all…" he began, "you are the only woman with whom I have ever wanted children."
She turned to him, her expression vacant, void of emotion. She opened her mouth as if to speak, but said nothing, averting her eyes before slipping back into melancholy. "Scarlett," Rhett said as he slipped off the chair and moved to the settee next to her. "Please, my love…just talk to me." She looked at him, something sparking in her eyes but then dying. "Scarlett, you know that I love you, that…you are everything to me. Please, try to understand…"
"I knew that you…that you and she…that there had been…," she stammered as she tried to speak. "Oh Rhett," she cried, "I …" but she choked on her sobs and couldn't speak. Rhett pulled her into his arms, holding her as tightly as he dared. "It will be all right, my love. You'll see, it will be all right. I love you and this baby, nothing else matters. I'll take care of…of the boy, but he will never mean to me what this child means. Please Scarlett, don't let this come between us. Don't let this hurt you…I can't bear it, thinking that I've hurt you again."
She backed away, her eyes red rimmed with tears. "I can't…not yet," she cried. "I…this will take time…" Then she rose and left the room. Later, when he went to bed, she rolled over, her back to him. She was quiet, but he could feel a slight shake in the bed and heard the occasional sniffle as she cried herself to sleep.
She avoided him for two more days. She didn't hurl angry words at him or use any of her usual tactics for retribution, she simply avoided him. The closest she allowed him was at night, in their bed, but even then, her desire to be left alone was obvious. Rhett was cursing himself, crumbling inside, broken hearted and unsure of what to do. They had been so close, so happy, and he had ruined it. Maybe he should bring the boy here, he thought. But then he thought better. He would certainly find out about Belle and besides, the gossipmongers of Atlanta would have one more bit of juicy gossip to crucify Scarlett with. No, bringing the boy to Atlanta was not the solution.
Then a miracle happened. He walked into the parlor and found Scarlett staring out of the window. Quietly he made his way to her and stood behind her. "Scarlett, please," he sighed softly, "I love you …"
She turned and looked at him. "I know…I…" Her tears flooded her face and she gave up trying to speak. He pulled her to him, holding her close and rubbing her back. "It was all before you, my love…I never wanted a family until you…"
She sniffled into his chest, her tears slowing as she listened to him and the beat of his heart. Putting her hand over the thumping, she began to come out of her fear as she realized that he was afraid this would drive her away. And as he said, it happened before he knew her. Besides, she had married and had two children with other men and he accepted that…treated them kindly. How could she be so angry because he'd had a child before…a love child, no…he didn't love the woman or the child. The boy, no he would be a man by now, meant little to him, just a responsibility. And she had children that weren't his… her mind came back to that fact. He really didn't know her when she married Charles and had Wade, so that wouldn't have hurt so much. But marrying Frank and having Ella…Rhett was in love her by then, she knew he was even though he had tried to deny it for so long. Suddenly she understood what she had done to him, what watching her with another man must have felt like…watching her belly grow large with another man's baby. And he had been so kind to her then. As she thought of Rhett over the years, she realized how he had always been there for her in one way or another. He needs me now, she thought. Looking up, she gazed into his grieving face. "I'll be all right. It was …just a shock. It will be fine, Rhett."
His dark eyes bore into her green ones, searching for truth. "You're just saying that…it still bothers you," he said bitterly.
"Matching his stare, she replied. "Yes, it bothers me, but I'll find a way to be all right with it. You…well, you've dealt with all my…foolishness, put it behind you…us, and I will find a way to put this behind us too. After the baby comes, we'll go to New Orleans, you can make it right between you and the boy…, and I want to meet him. He might appear sometime in our children's lives and I want to know the kind of man they will be dealing with. But I'll have nothing to do with the Watling woman and I don't want you anywhere near her either…"
Rhett swallowed with difficulty. "I haven't seen her in ages, Scarlett. Not since ..well, you lost the last baby. I don't love her…never have, at least not in a way that you need to worry about. She's been a good friend over the years, that's all. And since I first laid eyes on you, there has really only been one woman for me, although you were hardly a woman at the time…still a child, really."
Scarlett's emerald eyes sparkled; she was trying to find a way out of this mire. "I would have thought my outburst in the Wilkes' library would have sent you running," she teased.
A wicked grin began to form on his face as he remembered that day. "Not at all. I was enamored by your fire and zeal, even if it was wasted on the passionless Wilkes."
Scarlett smiled at him sheepishly. "We are suited for one another, don't you think? I mean, me with my …passion and temper and you with your …own passions."
"My dear," he smirked, his mood brightening, "you are my only passion these days."
"Ah, as I sampled the other afternoon," she taunted.
"This day isn't yet over," he hinted.
Scarlett smiled demurely, her eyes revealing the fire that his words ignited. "So it isn't…not yet."
The days passed quietly, Scarlett growing larger and more uncomfortable. Wade and Ella ventured over to visit Beau Wilkes and soon the trio were together as if they had never been separated. Scarlett was content and Rhett happy until one afternoon, Ashley Wilkes appeared on their front doorstep, looking for Beau.
Mammy showed him into the parlor and went in search of Rhett and Scarlett. The children had gone out early that morning and Mammy had assumed they were at the Wilkes'. Ashley was under the impression that they were at the Butler mansion all morning.
Scarlett was in her room when Mammy found her and explained. "Oh my," said Scarlett, wondering where the children were. "Go find Rhett, Mammy and send him to the parlor. I'll go down now and talk to Mr. Wilkes."
Mammy shuffled off, searching for Rhett while Scarlett headed for the parlor. "Ashley," she smiled, as she moved through the open doorway. "How nice to see you again," she smiled.
Ashley turned and shock overtook him as he saw Scarlett. "I'm terribly sorry, I didn't know you were…well, in a family way." He was clearly embarrassed by her advanced condition.
"Why yes, we are expecting the baby early next month…Rhett and I are so happy about it." Her pleasure was sincere.
Confusion washed over his face. "But I thought…the last I had heard was…"
"That I had left Scarlett?" Rhett's ominous voice sounded from the doorway. "I did go to Charleston for business and while we were separated for some months, the rumors of my abandonment were…unfounded."
Ashley turned and stood staring at Rhett, shaken. "Captain Butler," he managed, his eyes not leaving Rhett's face. "I am pleased that the rumors are untrue. However, you seem to have suffered a great injury and for that I am sorry. Obviously, that is why Scarlett left us for so long."
"Obviously," Rhett sneered.
"I…came because…I thought Beau was here…with Wade and Ella. But Mammy says she believed them to be at my house. I have no idea where they might be."
"Oh," Scarlett began. "Oh no…they were told that they could only go to your house, no place else."
"Well, perhaps Captain Butler and I can find them."
"But Rhett…he is not to be out of doors for too long…" said Scarlett, still wondering where her children might have got to.
"Never the less, my dear," Rhett intoned, "The children must be found. I'll wear one of my wide brimmed hats to keep the sun off my face. Now you try to rest, please. And I promise to bring the children back as quickly as possible." Then turning to Ashley, "if you'll just give me a minute, Wilkes, I'll be right back down." He headed up the stairs, taking two at a time and disappeared in the direction of his room.
Ashley turned to Scarlett. "What happened to him, Scarlett? His face is so…"
"He was caught in a fire in Charleston," Scarlett declared angrily. "Surely the rumors and stories have made it back to Atlanta by now."
"Pitty-Pat said something to that effect but I honestly didn't understand it to be so serious."
"He almost died. Why, if I hadn't gotten there when he did…they would have let him. I'm sorry if I sound cross but it still angers me that his own family had given up on him so easily. Things are different for him now, but we are happy and I wouldn't be having this baby if…if he had…but he didn't. And we have so much to look forward to now."
"Yes, of course you do," Ashley said in his gentle manner. "And I am truly glad for you, Scarlett. You deserve to be happy."
"How have you been, Ashley?"
"I've…learned to adjust. Life without my Melly is …hard. But Beau and I …we're getting along. The mills are even becoming quite profitable. You'd be proud of the books now, Scarlett. I might prove to be a businessman after all."
"That's good," she smiled. "You'll have something to leave to Beau…"
"Yes. It's not Twelve Oaks, but it is something…"
"One day you'll be rich enough to buy Twelve Oaks back, Ashley, you'll see."
"Perhaps," he shrugged. "But for now I've had to give up on dreams. Most of my dreams died with Melly anyway…" he said gloomily. "But I am learning to deal in reality," he came back with pride. "Not on a grand scale by any means, but still…I am doing it."
"Melly would be very proud," Scarlett said softly. "But then she always was proud of you…and Beau."
"Ready?" Rhett asked from the door, a panama hat in his hand.
"Yes, of course," Ashley said and he nodded to Scarlett and joined Rhett. The two disappeared out the front door together.
Scarlett spent the rest of the afternoon worrying. She had no idea where the children might have gone and even worse, Rhett and Ashley were looking for them together. Rhett knew he had nothing to fear from Ashley Wilkes, that Scarlett no longer had any feelings beyond the kind of kinship one feels for someone they've known their whole life, but still…he tended to be defensive where Ashley was concerned, all the old hurt still buried deep within. Ashley, she knew would be…as usual, clueless.
She tried to lie down but only thrashed about in the bed so she rose and went to the study. She loved that room; it smelt of cigars and Rhett. Still trying to relax, she stretched out on a chaise and continued to fidget. She almost wished she enjoyed reading as she looked at the vast bookshelf along one wall. But reading bored her, really. She'd so much rather be doing something. But there was nothing she could do. If she went out to look for the children herself, Rhett would be furious, she knew. And things had been too good between them for her to deliberately ignore his wishes. Besides, Rhett was probably giving the old cats of Atlanta plenty to gossip about; no sense her adding to it. So she sat…and fidgeted.
Rhett finally reappeared with the children about supper time. Wade was looking chagrinned and Ella looked, well…bewildered. "Honestly, Uncle Rhett," Wade was insisting, "we didn't do anything so bad. We just went down to the creek…."
"You were told you could go to Beau's house….no where else," Rhett said sternly as he guided them into the room where Scarlett sat.
Wade took one look at his mother and froze in his footsteps. Ella nudged closer to her brother, both seeing the anger flashing in her eyes. "Rhett is right; you two were not to go elsewhere. Down to the creek? You've been warned many times about that. Besides the snakes and such, there are bad men living down there. Why on Earth did you go?"
"Beau said…he said that the …fishing was good this time of year down there. So we decided to go see. He let me use his pole and he borrowed his father's pole and we walked all the down there by ourselves," Wade said proudly.
"Wade Hampton! You know better. And look at the fuss you created. Ashley was worried about Beau and Rhett had to spend most of the afternoon outdoors looking for you. That alone is serious. You know not to worry us like that," she concluded.
Wade stood in his spot, looking defeated, his head bowed. "Yes Ma'm," he answered dejectedly.
"And to think you took poor Ella down there, exposing her to all that danger. I would think you would have more consideration for your sister. Beau is younger, you were the oldest…it was up to you to insist on the right thing."
"Yes Ma'm."
It was then that Ella burst into tears. "But Mama, we had so much fun…Beau taught me how to skip rocks and we tip-toed in the water and…"
"Hush Ella. You shouldn't have been there in the first place."
Rhett put a hand on each of the children's shoulders. "Next time you want to go fishing, come talk to us. Either Mister Wilkes or I can go with you, just to be sure you are safe. Your mother is correct when she says there are dangerous men down there. You've spent a lot of time at Tara and I think, Wade, you are familiar with the dangers that nature provides, but you are not prepared for what men might do. When you are older, I'm sure your mother will let you venture out more on your own, but for now…the creek is off limits unless a parent is along."
"Yes sir," he said, a little less down trodden.
"All right," said Scarlett. "Now that that is settled, go wash up for supper."
The two children bolted from the room. Rhett looked at Scarlett who looked at him, concerned. "Were you able to keep your face covered?"
"Not entirely," he answered. "But I don't think any damage was done. I'm afraid I'll be the talk of the town again, however, since several of our leading citizens saw me."
"Well, let them talk. I don't give a hoot….just as long as your face isn't irritated."
"I'm fine, my love," he smiled. "Were you able to rest?"
"Not really. But I'm sure you can cure my restlessness later," she cooed.
"Most happy to oblige," he grinned. "But for now, I also need to wash up for supper. I'll be down in a few minutes."
Scarlett smiled as she watched him leave the room. Yes Ashley, I really am happy, she thought as she stood to head for the dining room.
gwtwgwtwgwtw
See what lots of reviews can do for you? Three days instead of four or five;-) I have a miserable summer cold but you all inspired me so much that I typed between hacking coughs to get this out as quickly as possible. Hope you enjoyed!