She got some explain' to do

"I met Rob about ten years ago. Rob's the guy you met here a couple weeks ago." Danny nodded and said, "Yeah, I figured that part out." I hate it when Danny's mad at me; it also makes all of this harder to tell. Oh, well I might as well get it over with. "Well, like I said we met ten years ago. Rob works for the FBI. They went to the sheriff for help on a case. There had been a kidnapping. They thought they were in the area. So we helped them look. That's how I met Rob. After the case was over, he asked me out. We dated for about two years, before we moved in together. We did that for another two years, before Rob asked me to marry him. I really wasn't sure at first. We were both in different places in our lives. Rob being ten years older then me, he was in a place were he wanted a family. I really wasn't, but I loved him and didn't want to lose him, and what he had. So I said yes and we got married. Everything was fine for awhile. He worked a lot, and I worked a lot. That seemed to work for us, which should have been a clue that we shouldn't be married. Rob got a really big drug involved case, where he had to go out of town a lot, which never bothered me. I was to busy with my work to notice that he was even gone. In fact if he hadn't told me every time he left, I probably wouldn't have even known he was gone, which should have rung some warning bells. Rob's part with the case got bigger. He had gotten some of the major players to trust him, so they wanted Rob to go fully undercover. Nobody knew how long it was going to take, and he wouldn't be able to make contact with me or any of his family. We talked about it and decided he should do it. I could never ask him not to do his job. I would never want him to tell me not to do mine. So he left. The only thing that really changed in my life was that everyone in town wanted to know where he was. They all thought he had left me. I know this because my sister-in law heard the rumor going around town. It kind of bothered me a little. I started to realize about that time that our marriage was not working out, which was hard for me, because I felt like I had failed. That I wasn't a good wife or even a good person." I pause and look at Danny.

Danny is looking at me, and I can't really tell what he is thinking or feeling. I look back down at my hands and continue my story. "Rob had been gone for two years. I hadn't heard from him since he left. I decided I needed to move on with my life. By this time I had become a CSI. I was working a lot more then before. I thought it would be a good idea to concentrate fully on work, and not to think about the past anymore. It wasn't long after that, I got a call from Mac. I moved here and left all that back in Montana.

Rob called me back in October, telling me he was back, and he was coming to New York as soon as could. He called the night we were supposed to go to dinner. That's why I didn't show up. I really am sorry about that." I look up at him again so he can really see how sorry I am. "Wow, I don't think I was expecting all that. In fact I don't think in my wildest imagination I could have thought of any of that." I nod, and say. "If I hadn't been living it, I wouldn't believe it. It kinda sounds like a soap opera, if you think about it. I can't believe my life is a soap opera. That is so depressing." I close my eyes and lean my head on the back of the couch. I stay like that until I hear Danny clear his throat. I open my eyes and look at him, "What's going to happen between the two of you now? What was tonight? There is still a lot I don't understand." Those are good questions. Now I hope I can give him some good answers. "We have filed separation papers. Unfortunately the laws of Montana, which is were Rob filed for divorce, we have to be legally separated for a year before we can get divorced. Apparently the two years he has been gone don't count, because it wasn't legally documented or something like that. So we have to wait a year for the divorce. Tonight was, I don't know. I have tried really hard to resist this thing between us. It wouldn't be fair to any of us. Tonight though I just didn't feel like resisting, maybe because my conscious feels a little less guilty now that we are separated. I don't know, but the reason I stopped was because it's not fair to you. I shouldn't have dragged you into all of this. I shouldn't have let you kiss me. I'm so sorry." I can't look at him this time. I feel so bad. "You're right it was unfair to me. You should have told me a few months ago when I asked you out. You should have let me make my own decision about all of this." I feel the tears start coming to my eyes. "I would have told you I still wanted to try this." I look up in surprise. The tears are now running down my face. "Lindsay, it doesn't change how I feel about you. Yeah, it complicates things a little, but you now have someone to lean on through all of this." Danny starts wiping the tears from my face with his thumbs. "You mean you still want to go out with me. Even though I hid the truth about my life from you, and pushed you away. Even though I won't be able to get a divorce for a year." He stops wiping my tears, and cups my face in his hands. "Hey, you're separated. It's not like we'd be doing any thing wrong, and it would also be good if you stopped hiding stuff. I care about you Lindsay. I think I've made that clear. I want this. I want you." With his hands still cupping my face, he leans in and kisses me.

Hey, guys! I am going with Anna's real age on this. She is 34, so 10 years ago she would have been 24. So she would already be a cop. You also might be wondering about the separated for a year thing. Well in North Carolina were I live that is the law. My parents and my sister went through the same stupid thing. They had to be separated for a year before they could get a divorce, something about time to change your mind. Let me know what you think.