A/N Thank you so much for your review everyone. Please keep them coming, it helps me write faster, or else I loose my motivation. Here is the next installment. I hope you like it.

JD's POV.

As a doctor, patience is always a handy virtue to have. I however, think I'm just about all out. This day is going so horribly wrong that I don't think I'll last long enough to see it through. A patient of mine just died, because I couldn't figure out what was wrong with her. Not only do I feel bad because she was so young, I feel like its because of my incompetence that it happened. As I've mentioned before, I'm severely sleep deprived, and I can bet my next paycheck that its why I couldn't diagnose her. So the short of it is that I killed a 10 year old girl because I didn't have the good sense to get a full night's rest. Just great.

As I sit alone in the launge, flipping through channels. I feel that pent up anger bubble up from inside of me. Why can't I get myself together? What's wrong with me? When I really think about it, there isn't any real reason for me to be this dysfunctional. Yes, my girlfriend had a miscarriage, but its not like I was sure I even wanted to be a father. I never even got to know "it" and I don't think I really miss it enough to be the sole cause of my undoing. Yes, my girlfriend left me, what's new in that. Mentally imagines every girl in the world walking away from him, telling him. "its not you, its me".or "Tumhari galti nahi hai mert hai." I don't even know Hindi. He yells at the indian babe who just left him and joined the never ending line of girls who dumped him. Yes, it sucks to be dumped, but like I said, been there, done that, way too many times for it to make this big a dent. I even have a new apartment now, and everything is fine. Then why do I feel this way and why is it making me act so…crazy? I think I know the answer to that but it makes me sound even more immature or just insane in the membrane. I'm mad at myself for not being mad at my friends. When I needed them the most, my friends were fighting amonst each other about who should take care of me. Like I was a burden to them. For the first time in my life, I feel REALLY abandoned, and because I can't deal with it, I want to get their respect back by doing everything I can to not be a burden on them. So instead of confronting them, I'm actually making their lives easier by shutting out every part of myself. I'm not doing myself any favors, I know that, but for some reason I'm hell bent on doing other people favors. So yes, I'm mad at myself, because I can't deal with my abandonment like a normal person. I can't handle the fact that at the point where I have nothing to loose, I still keep finding things to loose, and then I end up losing them. I'm so messed up. The sad part of it though is that, I love my friends, no matter what they think of me, and I can't get myself to set things right, so I have no choice but to do exactly what I'm doing right now.

In a perfect world, my friends would stick by me no matter what, and unconditionally. Not because they are obliged to, but because they genuinely care. This is not the perfect world though, and I can't blame anyone for that. So I'm just going to continue destrying my life in this twisted "other people come first" sort of way, because I can only blame myself for everything that does and doesn't happen in my life. So, the bottom line here is that not only am I screwed, I'm screwing up lives of patients. I need to get out of here before I kill someone else. I can't take care of anyone today, I'm just going to end up hurting others. Like I always do. I'm JD, class a looser, can't take care of myself, can't take care of others, can't do my job and basically can't stop being a burden no matter what I do. As I'm thinking about leaving right now, I already know Dr Cox is going to have to take my cases. Keith might not get to go for his dinner with Elliot because of me either. I'm such a total looser, but if I stay, in this condition, there is just no telling what will happen. I can't play with lives like that. I gatta go.

……………………

Janitor's POV

Life is good. I've got Dorean right where I want him. In fact I've gotten him so many times in the past few weeks, its actually given me a high. I'm serious, I sat there for 3 hours staring at his body print on the floor last week, after I got him to trip over my broom and into a pile of dirt outside the hospital. Ah, that was a good day. My plan to systematically break his spirit, has finally started to work. He has not clue how to beat me. God, I think I might tear up at the thought of him bowing down to my superiority. He thinks he's all that because he's a doctor and I'm a janitor. Well, he's got another thing coming.

Today is going to be a special treat. I've gotten the prank of a lifetime set up just for my little friend. I hope he cries. I always enjoy it when people cry. Not the ones I like, like Blonde Doctor, people like Dorean. OK, mainly just him, maybe his black friend too. Anyway, this is going to be great. Here he comes. Oh he looks distracted. Perfect! But honestly, has he learned nothing in the past six years. You never get distracted when leaving the hospital, especially if the janitor doesn't like you. But oh well, his stupidity works for me. Now, all he has to do is get onto is scooter and drive. The chain I have attached to it will yank him, and then my good friend from the cafeteria will drive the truck by, and bam!...collision. Its gonna hurt, but he'll live. I'm going to enjoy this.

There, he's getting started and hasn't noticed the chain…good good.

Oh no! The truck is too slow…he's gonna get run over! Noooooo!

CRASH

Dear god, his body rolled over on top of the bumper and then back down. He's not moving! Shit!

"JD!" I yell, running to his side. He doesn't respond, and for a split second I fear the worst. But then, a moan escapes his girly lips, and I'm so relieved I could hig him. But I don't of course.

His eyes are clenched shut so tight, I'm afraid he might make them bleed. Speaking of blood, there is some trickling down his mouth. That bothers me but I'm not sure if that's something to worry about or not. He could have just bit his tongue. Nothing else seems broken on the outside. Except that he clutching his ribcage like nothing else in the world. His leg is in a funny position too, unnatural. Mostly cuts and bruises otherwose. But who knows what's happening inside. My heart begins to pound at the idea. Something is wrong, more so than usual.

"JD, you ok?"

"Janitor?" He ask softly, without opening his eyes.

"You hurt?" I ask, stupidly, of course he is. I was trying to judge how badly but I just can't seem to form the right words. It seems he's having the same problem.

"I..(cough) urm yes. ( cough) a little." More blood seems to pour out of his mouth at each cough. My hands start to shake. This is all my fault. How could I be so stupid. This was dangerous and I knew it. Why don't I think these things through? I could have killed him. I still might.

People are beginning to gather around. I hear someone bringing a stretcher. I'm glad we're still in the Hospital parking lot. I don't even want to think about how bad this could have been if we weren't.

……………………

Dr Cox's POV

I can't put my finger on it but something is off with Emma. She's been acting weird all month. For starters, she actually turned me down when I "The mentor" asked to take her for dinner to "talk". Something I bet she would have given an arm, a leg and breasts for only a few days before. She hasn't given me glazed over puppy faces lately, nor has she followed me around like the good little girl she normally is. This should make me feel downright ecstatic because, dear god did I deserve a break from all the constant whining and bitching and basically using up my precious brain cells for blocking out irrelevant information, but I don't feel that way at ll. I guess I got used to Newbie rattling on about himself, it made for good background noise and I had plenty of material to mock him with. Only these days, he's been distant, and for some reason always around when I need to blow off steam. Its not like I haven't noticed that when ever I get particularly mad, he "magically appears." So that I can rant. I see the resigned acceptance on his face, like he's okay with me insulting him. He's figured me out, he knows that I need to do it, and is letting me, for some unknown reason. Not only that, it seems that he's Mr fixer upper these days. I find myself subconsciously listening to him every time I need someone to show me the proverbial mirror. Even more so than Carla. I don't know why I do it, its not like his opinion really matters, and I'm not delusional enough to think that he actually knows me. No one knows me, I am No-ohho-hot predictable. All the same though, he seems to know what's wrong, and these days his "wisdom" isn't attached to proclamations of undying love, or invitations to slumber parties or playing catch. All in all, he's acting weird and its sort of unnerving. How do you deal with a Newbie who's doing exactly what you think you want? I don't even know if I like him this sorted out. Except that I don't think he's sorted out at all. Between all the girlie noises, goofy gestures, bad hair and all that Jazz, JD used to be an optimistic and dare I say, happy person. Now, even though all the rest of the stuff still persists annoyingly, I can tell that all the optimism is gone. There are times when he thinks no one is watching, when his eyes become so sad and lonely, that it actually scares me. I've seen him lonely and sad before, but never has it been a secret. I didn't think Marry-anne was capable of secrets. So what's changed?

I have no clue, and god forbid I even have to ask. I'll just let it simmer for a bit, before an intervention has to take place. Right now though, I've just found out that he's lost a patient, a little girl. And her postmortem reports suggest a really rare desease that there was no way in hell he could have caught. Hell I don't think anyone here would have, but of course he'll beat himself up about it. He's a good kid that way, takes things hard but always bounces back. I just have to make sure he keeps bouncing back this time too, I can't work with this new unpredictable Newbie.

I'm about to go look for him when Carla come running in.

"Dr Cox!"

"What now! I was this close to going ten minutes without being interrupted…"

"Its Bambi. He had an accident." I don't even register what she's saying, but my feet seem to be running in her direction on their own.

"What happened?" I ask, trying my best to sound professional and not like a worried dad.

Tears are running down he cheeks as she speaks. "He's got hit by a truck in the parking lot. He's got a bunch of broken ribs for sure, is coughing up blood and is having trouble breathing." She says, while both of us quickly make our way towards ER.

God Newbie, what did you do this time? You better not be hurt top bad, or I'll force feed you my stethoscope for breakfast. You're not allowed to get hurt, we don't have that kind of luxury. We're doctors, we're supposed to take care of people. Did ya miss that lecture while you went ahead and daydreamed about princes on white horses during med school? God, I'm talking to myself during a mad dash, could I be more insane? That's a page out of Newbie's book though isn't it. All the talking in the head and zoning out. He better be Okay or I'll kill someone. Maybe that asshole who ran him over.

………………..

Turk's POV.

This can't be happening! This is not supposed to happen. Everything was going just fine. My life was perfect ten minutes ago. I was having a great day, my baby was whispering sweet something somethings in my ear on the nurse's station, I had a successful heart transplant surgery and my best friend had not been hit by a frigging truck. Why the hell does this knda stuff have to happen when things are finally looking up for JD? We were supposed to have a guys night in today, and for once, it wasn't because I had to take care of him. He was doing fine and we were actually going to have fun, maybe even play foot or finger. Now, I'm standing outside the ICU ward, watching Carla, Dr Cox and Elliot, stabilize him. He had been conscious when they brought him in. He even waved to me, and smiled. But once they got him into the ward, he went into cardiac arrest. Apparently a broken rib has nicked his arteries. I'm the surgeon on duty, so I'll probably be doing his surgery in a few minutes. This is just so surreal. Its not like an appendectomy, so many things can go wrong with open heart surgery. I'm scared for my V-bear. And most of all, I'm scared I might screw this up and take my best friend's life.

Why do thing like this happen to JD? I can't stop asking myself that. Hasn't he suffered through enough. Is someone up there punishing me for not wanting to take care of him when he was down? I know that I was being selfish, but I couldn't help it. I'm not as strong as JD is. Actually, I've never given him the credit he deserves. He's a much stronger person than any of us. He has pulled himself together from a lot of things, and all he asks is that we support and encourage him. Why was that so hard? He's never complained when I complain about marriage, having kids, Dr, Wen yelling at me and god knows how much more. In fact, he listens to everything I say for as long as I need to talk. He always has. He does that for everyone around here. We always take him for granted. That he'll always take care of us, when we need help, but when it comes to him, we all think we're doing him a big favor. Hell, that's what friends do right? Take care of each other? Oh god JD. I'm so sorry! Don't do anything stupid and die on me man. Please, I love you Vanilla Bear…in a manly way. Don't do this to me.

A/N: I hope this was ok. please review, I get lazy when I think no one's reading.