DISCLAIMER: We don't own Labyrinth or any of the characters associated with the film. They are the property of the Jim Henson Company. We do, however, torture them with ridiculous plotlines from time to time.

AN: Hehehehe. :)

Sarah was walking home, down a very mundane road, from her very mundane job. She worked in a call centre where she was forced to listen to the pointless drivel of teenagers with cell phone problems. While actively tuning them out, only listening for key words, she liked to write. She wrote poem after poem, and sometimes the occasional short story. It was the only thing that kept her alive through all the monotony of her day to day existence. Today she had written a particularly touching poem about the benefits of imaginary boyfriends. She could think about having sex with said imaginary individual and avoid the whole messy business altogether.

This thought contented her greatly. She could become a nun and imagine having a boyfriend and having perfectly lovely, mess-free sex – in her mind. It was such a wonderful plan. She was thinking this, planning and scheming it all out as she rounded the same corner she always walked round, when she found herself face to face with a frequenter of her imaginary boyfriend dreams. She stopped dead in her tracks.

"You!" she said, her mouth hanging open and her hand poised in mid air, pointing at him.

"You!" he spat back, crossing his arms over his chest and muttering something that sounded like 'I should have known.'

"You're…," she started shakily, her mind betraying her with the reminder of her imaginary boyfriend plan. "You…"

She had the base instinct to turn and run and NEVER EVER look back, if only to avoid getting dirty. She had to admit that her memory was either getting a little fuzzy in her old age, or he was getting even better looking (if that was even possible).

"The Goblin King," she finished, nearly incoherently.

He frowned at her. "Of course I am. Have you gone daft, woman?"

Sarah shook her head wordlessly as her eyes drank in his tall, haughty appearance quite happily. Her hormones were betraying her: get dirty Sarah. Get real dirty. She grimaced and fought back a verbal retaliation on her mind. There was something so indescribably sexy about him and all his arrogance. He reeked of power and it made her want to be powerless under him – literally.

That was it! She'd had quite enough. She inclined her chin angrily and set her eyes to maximum hardness before turning on her heel and attempting to go back around the corner. The problem was that when she turned around, the corner wasn't there. Panic started to flare up within her. She was trapped. Her first instinct was to blame the Goblin King. His innate sexual presence was making her very irritable. She spun around again to find that the whole street motif was gone. Sarah glared at him only to find that he was glancing around his person with a rather disdainful expression.

"You!" she spat for the second time. He turned his attention upon her coldly. "You did this!"

Jareth huffed scornfully. "I assure you I did not."

"Well," she said angrily, advancing upon him in a rage. She didn't know why she'd moved forward at all. She must have been completely fuelled by fear to do so, otherwise she would have faced the nothing that was currently surrounding them and thought about very ugly men drinking beer and scratching their testicles crudely. It was a better fate than looking upon a man of his attractiveness.

"Who else would have done this?"

Jareth dropped his arms to his sides and narrowed his eyes at her with contempt. "I assure you that I had nothing to do with this. Trust me, there are far better things I could be doing right now to occupy my time."

His expression changed suddenly and his eyes raked her from her head to her toes, lingering on more curvaceous areas as he went. Sarah alternately hated and enjoyed the sensation. "My, my, Sarah. You've grown up," he said huskily, a predatory smile stretched across his face. "Perhaps we can find something entertaining to do together after all."

Sarah's mouth fell open in indignation. For a moment she was completely speechless. Before her tongue remembered how to work, her chin jumped in, inclining even further and leaving her nose high in the air.

"Don't even think about it."

Jareth smirked again as her green eyes flashed fury and her chin jutted petulantly. For all the years apart, and for all the growing up she had done physically – he let his eyes drift over her round breasts and full hips – she still had not matured at all. She was still the haughty, scared girl that had run his labyrinth.

A haughty, scared girl with a great ass he amended, as she whirled away, trying to make sense of this void they were in. He didn't bother. He knew that there would be nothing to see here, until one of them created it.

Remembering the expression when he implied an intimate relationship, he grinned to himself, then adjusted the fit of his pants. If he had to be uncomfortable, so could she. Doing nothing more than willing it to be there, Jareth caused a bed to appear beside them.

Sarah spun around, and her eyes grew large when she saw the massive four-poster bed. It was immense, with silk sheets, and loads of pillows.

Jareth watched her take in the bed, not missing the fact that her nipples were at attention. He licked his lips, imagining the taste of those sweet soft breasts against his mouth, imagining how those nipples would pebble against the pressure of his rasping tongue. He walked closer to her, then passed around her, barely brushing his shoulder to hers. He was attuned to every little gasp and expression she made as he did so.

"Do you like it Sarah?" he asked, silkily. "You see, I understand that we are to be stuck here. And I'd rather be comfortable while we're here."

Sarah gritted her teeth and glared at him. "I knew you caused this to happen, you lecherous snake! How else would you be able to manipulate it?"

Jareth chuckled, then coming up behind her, murmured in her ear "I am not the only one with magic, you know. Someone else has done this. I am only manipulating it to my comfort. You can do the same."

Sarah snorted. "Oh, really?" She said, then closed here eyes and focussed on creating a chair for herself, far away from the bed. Opening her eyes, she found it had appeared. The basic, simple office chair from her cubicle at work. Padded, armless, and on coasters, it was possibly the least comfortable thing she had ever sat on. But at least it wasn't the bed.

She strode over to it and sat down, spinning quickly away from him. Jareth laughed out loud at her immature retaliation, the stretched out on his bed, crossing one booted foot over another. He gazed at her under lowered eyelids.

"That won't keep us apart long, my sweet. You know, very soon, that we are going to be together. Why fight it? You know sex between us would be fantastic."

Sarah curled her lip, and spun towards him for a split second, determinedly ignoring the long lithe form on the bed. "That would be impossible" she said, then spun back to gaze into the nothingness that was the void they were in. "I don't like sex at all."