The Journal

Summary: James recieves a journal for Christmas from an anonymous sender. What better to do with it, than write? Seventh year, JP pairing. R&R please!

A/N: Sooo sorry I haven't updated in a while! I'm pretty sure that I have no readers left...but hey! I do it for myself. The reviews are a lovely bonus that keep me going:)

I would also loovvveee to thank all my reviewers so far. I know the last entry was a bit short, but James was rather worried about Sirius, so he couldn't write much.

I am currently in a Star Wars obsessed mood right now, so updates will be slow.

James How can anybody like that Star Wars crap better than me?
Me: Uh...I really don't know. -crosses fingers behind back-

Nothing belongs!

P.S.: I am currently writing this in the dark, and my typing speed is only 50 wpm. Sorry for any mistakes, I'll fix them later!

James heaved a great sigh of relief and left the Hospital Wing, feeling elated and extremely high.

Those Smarties thingies were good! he thought, as he set off back to the Gryffindor Common Room. He made a mental note to get his father to pick some up the next time he went to work at the Ministry. James's father hardly ever Apparated to the Ministry, owing to a rather nasty incident of Splinching before he got married to his mother. Ever since, he was afraid to death of the means of transport, and almost always used the Underground to go to the Ministry. James had gone with him before, and had seen a large metal cage thing, called a vending machine. When he asked about it, he was told it dispensed all sorts of confections and snacks. He hadn't paid any attention to it, until now.

I'm sure that there's are Smarties in that place. I'll get my dad to send me some. But I'm going to have to hide them from Siri. If he finds them, I'm dead. I'll lose my badge for sure.

Shuddering, he fingered it lightly. He knew he was being sentimental, and if some rabid fan-girl found him now, she would have melted into a pile of goo at his 'sweetness'. But he was James Potter, Quidditch champion, second best player. The female Patil twin was first, as everybody including McGonagall had reminded him. And even he had to admit, she kicked ass. Her Seeking skills were excellent, and she didn't look so bad either...

Bad thoughts, bad THOUGHTS!! James screamed inwardly. He hurried towards the Gryffindor tower, which was mercifully empty except for one person.

Lily Evans glared at him from one corner of the Common Room. James returned the look, wishing for once that he could drop his matured look and simply attempt to kiss her. Reminding himself that losing his face to a Death Eater was much more honorable, he sat down and opened his Journal once more and began to write.

December 31, 1978

Well, it's New Years eve, and the Common Room is empty. Oh well, I think McGonagall banished the whole lot of us to our beds, or we're all finding better places to celebrate the New Years.

Frankly, I'm enjoying the peace and quiet. No Sirius to annoy the heck out of me, no Peter who's going to ask me for help incessantly, and no Remus, who uses his quiet charm to shut me up. Just me and my mind.

Yup, this is gonna be one hell of a party.

Well, Lily's here, but getting my face cursed off isn't exactly going to be the best way to welcome the brand new year is it?

I am so totally bored.

And I am so totally sounding like a girl.

Stop that James!

Right.

Well, now that I have finished arguing with my non-existant friend, let me get ready for 1979 by making a list of New Years Resolutions. Hopefully, Sirius won't get his hands on this. I should probably do something to it, so that he can't find it without suffering excruciatingly. As much as I love my best mate, there are times when he really deserves some pain.

The New Years Resolutions of James

1. Win over my sweet Lily.

2. Make Sirius pay for reading my Will.

3. Pass 7th year Charms.

4. Make Lily admit she sucks at Transfiguration.

5. Help Peter know that he is smarter than he looks.

6. Help Moony find a cure for lycanthropy.

7. Start a family - with Lily.

8.

He paused for a moment and glanced at the corner. Lily had moved and was walking towards the chair opposite to him. It was not exactly as comfortable, and he didn't like the idea that while he was sitting on a poofy, comfortable chair, she was sitting on a hard one. He got up as Lily made to sit on that chair.

"Wait, sit here." he said, pointing at the chair he had just left. Lily stared at it, then stared at him. Finally, she got up and took her seat. James sat back down, muttered a spell for making it like the other chair, and began to write again.

8. Find a way to get all Slytherin's expelled from school.

9. Stop getting hooked on Firewhiskey.

10. Keep writing in this journal for all of eternity.

There, he was done. The last one troubled him slightly, but he didn't exactly mind. The journal had become a sort of companion for him in the past week, and he couldn't remember life without it. He waited for the ink to dry, and glanced at the fireplace. His hazel eyes flickered towards the clock on one corner of the room. 11:45. Fifteen minutes till midnight. Fifteen minutes until he had to officially start putting his resolutions into action.

He remembered the curse that Sirius had taught him. His parents had used it on him and his brother when they were younger, to dicipline them. Of course, Sirius got more of it than Regulus did. The thought made James's blood boil. Stupid, pure-blood fanatics. It wouldn't be much of a surprise when almost half of their family joined up with Voldemort. All except for Sirius of course. He pointed his wand at the page in his journal and muttered a modified version. Smiling, he closed the book.

"Why are you writing? Aren't you supposed to be out cursing some first year or something?" Lily broke through the silence. The sound of her voice washed over James and he shuddered. It always made him feel so vulnerable. He looked at her and sighed.

"I've changed. My life doesn't revolve around acting like an arrogant jerk anymore." he replied quietly.

Lily smirked. "As if I believe that." she replied. James couldn't take it much longer.

"Why do you always think that I'm a jerk? No matter what I do, it doesn't seem to be good enough for you." he said, more harshly than intended. Lily stared at him, her eyes cold.

"I've known you for over six years. I know that old habits don't die out." she replied, her voice nothing more than a whisper, as if she didn't want to believe it herself.

"Well, maybe it's time for you to change that outlook." he shot back. "I have changed, whether or not you want to believe me. And if you don't want to, that's fine."

They lapsed into a silence that James couldn't take. He pulled out the Marauders Map, and then muttered, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.". The Map revealed itself, and hey looked around for the dots of his friends. They were hanging out near the Kitchens. "Mischief Managed." he muttered, then stood up. Lily was staring at him, her expression unchanged.

"Happy New Years," he said, as the clock chimed twelve. "And I'm sorry."

A/N: A bit longer than usual, don't you think? Ah well. Now, there's only about a week of holidays left (for them), so I want to get things to move along a little. This fic is coming to a close, there aren't much more than 2 or 3 chapters left. I'm also planning on finishing up Kids Again, because I have another Eragon fic that I want to start.

R&R!!

BookWyrrm