A/N: This will be a two-part chapter, partially because it would be really long otherwise, and partly because suspense is nice. Boo-yah.

Anyway, here's Chapter Seven…

Chapter Seven: Bar-sitting, Part one.

Cid's idea of 'preparation' was to lock Yuffie in a closet. The ninja, who was still trying the 'no talking for a half hour' thing, didn't make a single noise as the pilot shoved her into the cramped cupboard, and told her to stay there.

Yuffie gave him the thumbs up sign, and he slammed the door, leaving her alone in the dark with the mop.

"Well, that's taken care of." Cid said, dusting off his hands. He pulled out one of the bar stools, and sat down. "Aah…" He noticed Tifa giving him a Look, and managed to look indignant. "What? What did I do?"

"Let me see…" Tifa pretended to think it over. "You locked Yuffie in a closet, and are about to play an extremely mean trick on Vincent. What else?"

Cid shrugged, reaching for a pack of cigarettes that weren't there. He swore, remembering that he'd given them up for the day. It hadn't been that long, but his hands were already starting to shake. "Hey, relax." He said lightly. "Look, I gotta do something to get my mind off of havin' a smoke. This was the best thing I could think of."

He gave Tifa what could only be described as a purely evil grin. "Besides," He added. "I think that leaving the two of them alone together could be interesting."

Tifa rubbed her forehead. She was developing a splitting headache. "I'm not even going ask what you're implying." She said, thinking over the possibilities.

In her mind, she imagined coming home to find bullet holes everywhere, Vincent either gone or hiding under a table, and Yuffie helping herself to the alcoholic contents of the establishment. Not a pretty picture, she thought with a grimace.

"What's with the face?" Cid asked, noticing her scowl. "You're going on a date tonight! Sure, it's with Cloud, but how bad can it be? I mean, he's not all that bad looking, and- what?"

Tifa shook her head. " I can't believe we're having this conversation." She said, giving Cid a strange look. She got up to leave, making the excuse that she had to 'get ready'.

Cid watched her go. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he asked in confusion. "What's wrong with this conversation?"

He received no answer.

Cid tapped his fingers rapidly on the polished countertop. He started to whistle tunelessly, still tapping his fingers. The whistling grew louder, and then broke off entirely.

"Screw this." He growled. "I'm having a smoke." He hopped over the counter, and tried to remember where Tifa had put the pack of cigarettes after she'd so cruelly taken them from him.

"Think, Highwind. Think." He muttered to himself, opening drawers and shifting papers. "If I were Tifa, where would I stash…stuff?"

After a few moments of searching, he sat down on the floor in dismay when he remembered that Tifa had stuck the pack of cigarettes in her pocket.

However…his position on the floor put him eye-level with some nice-looking bottles of vintage wine, clearly some of the more expensive stock.

Normally, he'd be tempted to take it, but he was more of a beer man. And he didn't really want to steal from Tifa…

Then again, Tifa had his cigarettes.

It never occurred to Cid that he could always just go around the corner and buy more cigarettes. In this, he and Yuffie were similar: they both had one-track minds, and it took a lot of effort to get their minds off of that track. He pulled one of the bottles from the rack, and realized that he didn't have a corkscrew.

"Damn!" He hissed. He heard Tifa's footsteps coming back down the stairs, so he just stashed the bottle underneath his coat, and just barely managed to get back in his seat on the right side of the bar when Tifa entered the room.

Cid looked at her in amazement. "Wow…" He said. "You're wearing… a dress? Looks good." He said awkwardly.

Tifa blushed slightly. "Yeah, well…" she said with equal awkwardness. "Like you said, it's a date, right?" She hadn't worn a dress in a long time- it really wasn't her thing. After all, it was hard to kick somebody's ass in a skirt. She'd totally forgotten why she had this dress, but it seemed to fit, so she was wearing it.

"Anyway, I've gotta go." She said, glancing at the clock. The reservation was for six o'clock, and even though it was only a quarter to five, she wanted to be sure she was on time.

Tifa also had something to do before she went to the restaurant, and she wanted to give herself a buffer zone of a half hour of so, in case things didn't go as planned.

Cid gave her a thumbs up. "Gotcha, Tif. " he said.

Halfway out the door, Tifa paused. "Oh, and Marlene should be home soon. She was at a friend's house today, and I told her to be home by six. You'll let Vincent know if she doesn't get here before he arrives?" Cid gave her another thumbs up, and she walked out the door.

She looked around, fervently hoping that she wouldn't meet anyone she knew while she was wearing this dress.

It was very pink.

As soon as she was gone, Cid pulled the bottle of wine out from under his coat. "Jackpot." He said, looking around of a corkscrew. "C'mon," he said in annoyance. "This is a bar. Were the hell are all the corkscrews?"

He began to dig through the drawers again, but was interrupted by a knock at the door. "Shit!" he swore as he jerked his head up, banging it on the underside of the counter. It was probably Valentine-what was it with these people and being early?

Rubbing the already large lump on the back of his head, Cid went to the door. Sure enough, standing outside was none other than Midgar's Resident Raincloud, Vincent Valentine, who was knocking even though the door was unlocked.

Grumbling about people without enough common sense to try the door before knocking, Cid jerked it open. "You're early." He snapped, noticing just then that Vincent looked slightly dazed.

"What's wrong with you?" He snapped again, feeling like being mad at the world in general. He was suffering through what is commonly known as withdrawal, and as anyone will tell you, it's hell.

Vincent looked over his shoulder, a look of disbelief still on his face. "I may have been hallucinating, but…" he shook his head. "No, it was nothing."

"If you're gonna say it, say it." Cid said grumpily, closing the door with a deafening bang that should have shattered the glass, if luck hadn't been with him.

"Was it me, or did Tifa just walk by in a dress?" Vincent asked, gesturing at the street outside.

Cid just sighed. "Believe me," he said. "You don't want to know."

He yanked the door open. "Oh, yeah- I'm s'posed to tell you to let Marlene in when she gets here." He paused for a minute, and then added. "And don't open the closet, if you want to live to see the light of day." Then he was gone.

And so naturally, the first thing that Vincent did once Cid left was to open the closet door.

A/N: Well, there it was. Part Two coming soon! I'm just aposting fiend right now- this is the second chapter I've posted today!

Heh. It probably won't last.

Note to exturk: Can't post Attack of the Interviewer, too much to type. If I ever get un-lazy, maybe I will. Until then, tough luck.

Note to a.girl.named.jake: Oh, goodie. The date scene. Yes, that will be awkward, to say the least. And hopefully cute. ;)