Sakura POV
I'vebeendoingresearchlately
I failed.
Just when it mattered most, I failed again.
How can I face him? I can't even tell him that I'm sorry; he won't understand.
He might not even know that there is something wrong, something very
wrong with his mind.
How do you explain to someone that you destroyed their mind? That, sorry, I
just wasn't quick enough, smart enough, observant enough to save you.
It was different when I didn't know the patients, when I saw them die under the
hands of the surgeons and doctors. When they sometimes died under my hands.
But Kakashi is different. He was my sensei, he was the one who first worked with
me on chakra control. He's the infallible Copy Nin, legendary even before puberty.
I don't think he's going to be allowed on missions anymore; he wouldn't be able to
understand what the mission was about. How is he going to live? He doesn't know
any other life than that of a ninja.
His life is over. I might as well have his blood all over my hands.
Tsunande is trying to tell me that it's not my fault, but I'm not buying it. Even if it
is true that you probably were suffering from oxygen deprivation long before you
came to the hospital, I should have known that you were sick beforehand. I'm trying
to be a med nin, for Kami's sake! The marks of serious illness were all over you, and
have been for awhile.
I should have known. I should have been better. I guess I'm just not good enough.
I wasn't good enough to help you, I wasn't good enough to help Sasuke…
And I know that Tsunande doesn't blame me, and maybe Kakashi-sensei won't either.
But is seems like I'm just not meant to have precious people. Who am I going to let
down next? Who will I kill, whose life will I destroy? Will it finally be the indestructible
Naruto? The titanic Tsunande?
Legends brought down by a mere med nin.
Enough of this crap! You've had your bought of misery, now get your ass into gear!
Kakashi isn't a lost cause yet; start researching the mind. Maybe you can find a
way to help him understand. Speaking can come later, it's the understanding of
words that is important right now.
…That's right. Since when have I quit? I refuse to stop now because of a mistake; I'll
just have to do my best to correct that mistake. Most of the problem with brain damage
is that there isn't a lot of research done. I'll correct that; ninja get hit in the head all the
time, so there should be no end to the amount of data available.
For Kakashi's sake (not to mention my own), I'll find a way.
Ifyou'relostinthemedicaltermonology,gototheauthor'snote
Awyr here. Isn't Sakura awesome sometimes? Some people drive themselves into a major
depression over stuff like this, and end up doing nothing to try and fix the mistake.