Chapter 1
DOCTOR HAVOC SAYS I'LL HAVE A VISITOR TOMORROW. He says it's his son. Dr. Havoc was one of the few people I liked here in this nightmarish place. He had unruly brown hair and soft chocolate brown eyes. His face was slightly rounded and comforting to look at. All this topped off with an average body and other modest features; he made me feel advanced and flimsy all at the same time. So far, he's told me interesting stories about where he and his family used to live.
"France was a wonderful city, almost as if it was its own world," he would say with a fond look on his face, no doubt remembering all the good times he had had. Whenever he told me about France, I would feel bad and look down. Havoc said he never blamed me, but the happy looks always killed me.
The doctor would also always treat me normally. The other scientists would always have a look of pity, annoyance, or even frustration. I bare my teeth at them in return, which either scares them off or angers them further.
I used to do that to Dr. Havoc, too, but he only chided me. He reminded me of my father, and whenever he scolded me or looked at me with his kind of loving eyes, I feel like crying. Stockholm syndrome, I guess.
Anyway his son, Gaspard I think he called him, was turning 19 years old tomorrow.
"He's been interested in what I do for so long," he said with another distant look in his eyes. "I'm relieved and glad he can finally come to see this," he gestured around him, "And you." He winked and I frowned. Dr. Havoc was a very wonderful man, but who knew what his son would be like? He might be another shocked gawker. Besides, it's not like I'll get excited over a human. Gaspard would be behind inches of thick glass and in the 'Safe Zone' anyway.
I don't want a visitor; I just want to be alone. I would even sacrifice seeing the doctor for solitary confinement. I honestly would. Then again… New company would be intriguing. At least he wouldn't test me; I know Dr. Havoc wouldn't do that, even if he was a sick and demented teen.
I closed my eyes and lay down on the soft mattress I had in 'my room.' Spring less, of course, wouldn't want little ole' me using anything to get out. Of course, at any opportunity, I could get out without any tools.
My cell was practically empty and managed to be messy at the same time. There was my bed, a shabby toilet, and a curtain to cover that toilet. In one of the corners was a small reinforced door for sliding food through onto a table. That little factor annoyed me, for I knew I could easily rip through it if not for the multiple crosses engraved and attached to it on the outside and inside.
The room was about twelve feet high and sixteen feet wide. On one of the wider walls, about six feet up, was a large window took over. There, beyond it, was the 'Safety Zone.' I knew for a fact that it was wiped with holy water inside and out. Back when I was first here, when I used to plead for escape and slam myself around the only two changes in the room, I tried to get out frequently; hence the scars, although barely visible, on my body.
The floor was tiled and white, as were the walls and furnishings, almost blindingly so. One of the researchers— most likely, Jonson, the cocky 'expert'— thought it might make me weaker. No such luck, I don't know why they would think colors of all things would affect me. Hitherto, I don't know all the things that do and don't work on me either… That's what they tried to ask me first, before the tests, when all I did was scream in response. There was also an intercom in the ceiling corner next to the 'Safety Zone' window and a scale model metal door, although larger in size to allow people in and out.
The clock just outside the wall of glass in the 'Safe Zone' read 1:37 AM. It was true I didn't need much sleep thanks to my mother, but I decided try and have a dream or two anyway.
Before I was completely unconscious, I imagined different reactions Gaspard would have on me. Thoughts of my family and even what Mrs. Havoc might look like drifted my way too. Blonde hair and blue eyes often appeared on her, with a slightly out of condition body due to her child. I hoped with all my might that Gaspard would be similar to his father, and not a spoiled only child my imagination kept running away with.
Click. My eyes snapped open before anyone could speak over the intercom, already glaring and defiant.
"Helena, up and at 'em. There's time for a quick breakfast, then I'm sure my son would like to talk with you." The metallic voice the intercom gave Dr. Havoc wasn't very flattering. Not really wanted sedations or medications, I rolled out of bed onto the ground and stretched catlike. My, I was playful today.
"Food's here," Dr. Havoc said in what must have been a cheery tone. Despite all the technology they had here in the lab, they couldn't manage a top-notch intercom? It was sort of funny.
I walked calmly over to the cardboard tray in the corner of my 'room.' The door from which it came shut, closing off the fresh air and life off from me. I sighed and picked up the tray. Selecting a practically clean corner, I munched on a steak and drank up from the blood bag. That's all I could eat, really; meat and blood.
When I was finished, I chucked the tray in rebellion and stood, wincing at the bright fluorescent lights. Man, I never got used to them.
"Do you want to shower or anything?"
I nodded my head carefully; another pleasure in this place was the shampoo and conditioners. They always smelled nice and fruity to my keen nose. And at least it was a change of scenery and air, for that matter.
I saw Dr. Havoc nod his approval and two very big men, Ash and Jack, I think, with silver crosses in one hand came carefully through the door. They both looked strong enough to bench a car. With the hand without the crosses, they each took one of my arms and I submissively let them lead me through the metal door.
Clean air reached my nose at long last; it seemed fresher outside of my cell. The two men led me down the concrete hall, past two other doors, to the showering room. It looked like it was designed for ten or twenty people and as I stepped inside, I couldn't help but feel utterly lonely. I hadn't seen anybody but myself and the doctors in this building, and I could openly say I was sad that no one else was my friend, or in my environment, for that matter.
More crosses and silver were on the walls, no windows, apart from the door, and the only source of light came from a bare bulb hanging from the ceiling. After Ash shut the heavy metal door, I shed my white shirt and sweats, tossing them near the door for new ones. They used to be blindingly white like the room, but they looked more of a light gray due to the general dirt accumulated.
I turned on one of the shower heads and hot water scalded my body. My hand shot to the dial controlling the heat, but after a while, it felt good. For a few minutes, I let the hot water soak me. I felt warm and cozy, almost like I was back in the cave with my family. The water was warm in there too and, although not as hot, just as comforting. Spotting the hair products I did love, I washed my hair and somewhat tamed my curls and ringlets for now…
A couple knocks awakened me from my strange trance. Suddenly everything was in focus and I was aware of everything once more. Unwillingly, I shut the water off and looked next to the door where my clothes used to be. In their place was a fresh new pair of clothes and a towel. I quickly dressed and was led to another room.
There was a row of tables that were separated by small walls that oddly looked like cubicles. Glass separated the visitor and the prisoner, and a small grate allowed conversations. By experience, I expected holy water to be on the glass. The two bodyguards led me to a plastic chair and there I waited.
"… and I don't want you to be scared, she's really a nice girl." I recognized Dr. Havoc's voice immediately but kept my head down
"Okay, Dad," came an unfamiliar and surprisingly charming voice. The fact that it was a bit hesitant both confused and irritated me. Was I really that strange-looking?
"Over here, that's a good boy." I heard a soft plop and felt everybody's eyes on me. The doctor cleared his throat and said, "Gaspard, this is Helena. Go on, boy, don't be shy. She is a good listener."
I heard the boy clear his throat and stutter. Finally, he managed to say. "W-wow, I mean, hi." I smiled faintly and looked up at him, in the eyes. This I rarely did, even to the doctor. I was afraid of my powers letting loose in people's minds, for I was told that I could do things to them, like know what they were thinking, making them see me as perfection, and even brainwashing. How delightful.
"Uhhh…" Gaspard trailed off, mesmerized and surprised by my eyes and overall appearance. Strangely, instead of feeling angry, I smiled even larger, truly amused.
The doctor laughed nervously and stepped back. "I'm going to leave you two alone now." He turned to me. "Now don't dazzle him too much." Another wink and he was gone.
Gaspard looked blankly at me for a couple seconds, dumbstruck, and tried again. "So, ah, how are you today?"
I shrugged and gestured to him, which made him laugh nervously. It sounded so much like his father, especially since it was in practically the same tone. What else was the same between them? Same melting chocolate brown eyes and modest behavior, but that's about where the similarities ended.
Gaspard had soft features in the face, they weren't exactly perfect— what human was?—but they were quite handsome, I had to admit. His body was lanky, from what I could see; small wrists— one of which was covered in a black wristband with some name on it— with large, warm looking hands, skinny legs, a thin waist, a slightly wide peck area, and a smooth, wonderful neck. Sorry, I had to notice it. His neck was just so vulnerable with tendons showing, showing his every swallow, his pulse…
Instead of unruly hair, Gaspard had straight dark brown hair that covered his left eye. This was sort of odd, was he aware that there were things more perfect than mankind out there? That he was ashamed of his pretty face? Either way, it made him look more innocent and, there was no other word for it, needy.
Gaspard's lips were pallid, and somewhat thin, but they weren't terribly uninviting. On the bottom lip was two silver hoops, in the corners, that looked a bit exotic on his face. I think one of the circus performers had that same thing, although he looked much gruffer and the pierces looked manly on him, as if it were a token of his magnificent endurance. Snake bites, I think he called them when he caught me looking at them. Maybe it was a common thing in society outside of these walls.
So he was an attractive human, big deal. I wouldn't be amazed by him. After all, I wouldn't want to depress myself if he never returned. Yeah, that had to be it.
"I like your eyes," Gaspard said, a slight blush on his cheeks. This was a first, didn't he notice the rest of my perfect body? Yes, I was aware of myself, how sometimes I caught the doctors staring; especially Dr. Valdez from Brazil. He made me feel a bit insecure and I always had a bizarre urge to cover up my already clothed body.
I nodded, surprised snatching away my smile. I pointed to my bottom lips' corners with each of my forefingers and smiled, complimenting his hoops.
"Thanks… You do like them, right?"
I nodded again and put my palms down on the counter. We talked—or, I should say, he talked—for a while about everything and nothing; his childhood, his new life here, not at all blaming me or getting angry at me for his like his father, and even his dreams of getting a black 03 WRX Subaru. I think he was talking about cars, but I wasn't really sure.
After what seemed like hours, his dad came in. "Time to go, Gaspard. Did you have fun?"
That last questing bugged me. A lot. For the first time in a long time, I was angry at Dr. Havoc. Furious, even! That one question hurled me back to Rare Taboos, where I was nothing but an entertaining beast. That first sentence made me a little mad, too, I guess; this new company was good and refreshing from the usual.
But, instead of throwing a temper tantrum, I simply frowned and looked away. I was really proud of myself. I figured that with good behavior, Gaspard would return.
"Okay, dad," he replied, his tone implying he was a bit upset by the separation as well. "Good-bye, Helena."
My frown was gone; in its place was a civil expression. I think I even had a little color in my cheeks, how embarrassing. I looked at him and gave him a small wave before he was led out by Dr. Havoc.
"C'mon, let's get you back to your room," Jack said, ruffling his champagne-blonde hair. He elbowed Ash, who had nodded off in a chair, and stood up. Ash's black hair flew up, and his blue eyes snapped open. He stood up, a bit embarrassed, and shook of his drowsiness with a yawn. I covered my smile with one of my hands and let them lead me to my room.
That night, I dreamt of Gaspard. He was very odd, though. He just stared at me with different eyes. Violet, strange eyes that reflected what they had seen; burning buildings, murdered lovers, lab coats, and, most of all, pain. I realized with a gasp that they were my eyes. He wouldn't talk to me, only stare. I started to scream at him, to ask him why he only looked at me, why he had my eyes. I whimpered and sweat seemed to drip from every pore, but I couldn't wake up to my terrified body. Finally, he brought a mirror up to my face and I screamed, both in the dream and in the real world. Somehow I could see them, but I didn't want to; a mask of blood, an unfamiliar face, and empty sockets where my eyes should have been. I screamed as long as I could, until darkness surrounded me. I couldn't tell if I was still dreaming or not, but I couldn't stop.
See no evil a chilling voice crawled through me, making my sweat freeze. Terror choked me and my eyes widened so far, I thought they would pop out. I sobbed once, and fainted, all the while scared out of my mind to be alone with that nightmare in my unconscious mind.