Chapter Title: Genma Wants Variety/Maim, Kill, Destroy
If Genma knows anything about anyone, it's that Umino Iruka is far too pedantic when it comes to mission reports. Every mission report is the same, with the same old boxes, same old details and same old complaints about his writing. So his writing's a little scruffy – so what? It doesn't mean that Iruka-san has to get so… so… hissy about it! It doesn't affect his ability to complete the mission, so what does it matter? In the grand scheme of things, what does it matter what coloured pen he uses? (Pink glitter), or how he fills out his details? (Name: Kami-sama, Sex: Yes please!). He was not 'juvenile' damn-it!
All Genma wants is a little bit of variety, you know, spice up his life a little. It isn't as if he can try that out on the battle field. 'Oh wait Mr. Bad-ass-missing-nin, don't kill me, I just want to add a little variety, so what do you say to fighting with only a senbon and a set of fairy lights for weapons?' – yeah right. Really, the mission room is a much better place for such decoration, no matter what Iruka-san says.
Iruka-san just can't understand what it's like to be an active shinobi; life is so monotonous; in the most grotesque way possible. Genma's life goes like this; get mission from chuunin, go on mission, main, kill, destroy, write mission report, relive the maiming, killing, and destroying in the process, and repeat.
If Genma was a qualified psychologist like Ibiki-san, or a medic like Hokage-sama, then maybe he would know just how to explain to Iruka-san that the reason he left out Section D of his report was because he felt sick to his stomach going over the details of everything that he had done (main, kill, destroy), or that the reason it was so… extravagant was because he was trying to escape that memory (maiming, killing, destroying) and the knowledge that if he didn't try to distract himself with brightly coloured pens and childish jokes, he would lose his one connection to reality, his one bit of variety (blushes, annoyance, hidden amusement) and his repetitive life would mean only one thing;
maim, kill, destroy, maim, kill, destroy, maim, kill.. kill…
But how could Iruka-san, a chuunin and academy teacher possibly understand Genma's need for variety?
A/N: This one was a little less focused on Iruka than I wanted it to be, I started rambling and didn't have the heart to erase it; anyway: thank you to lilz and angelica for your kind comments - it's made my week! Thank you as well to those who have added me to alert lists, I hope you continue reading!