Secret Disires & Fears (G-3)

Timing: After the girls enter the realms together for the first time ('A Great and Terrible Beauty' pg. 252-260).

I run through darkened woods. I do not recognise them, they are foriegn and strange. Shadows lurk in corners and trees crowd my path, I manage to dodge them all narrowly. I pick up more speed as my surroundings seem to only become duller.

"Don't..."

I pause and turn to see who's whispering voice I hear. At first I see no one, only the tall trees looming over me threateningly. I lower my guard then in a flash, I see Kartik. Shadows play across his face and he speaks, but I do not have the wits to make out his words.

I sway for a moment, allowing the gloomy atmosphere a chance to sink in, chilling me to the bone. I take off as fast as possibly, heart pounding and mind spinning. Something about his face has thoroughly spooked me, I want to run as far away as I can.

The wind rushes by me, hissing into my ears. Soon I've even forgotten the words, however I continue to run. For some reason, I feel as though I have to, need to, or the darkness will eat me alive. Images of my mother's death flash before me and my eyes begin to swell.

Suddenly, I'm not there anymore. I'm somewhere else, somewhere beautiful, somewhere I now know to be the realms.

I stop running and begin to look around myself. I don't believe I've ever seen anything more beautiful than this place. The sun shines down onto me, making a small smile begin to sprout on my face.

"Gemma..."

I turn quickly, trying to see who or what is calling me.

"Gemma..."

It's my mother, I am sure of this much. Her voice is as smooth as silk and I find it hard to think clearly. Soon I'm running at a slower pace towards where I believe I hear her from.

"Gemma?"

I see her now. My eyes buldge slightly and now my smile is becomingpainfully large. She looks more peaceful as ever, her golden red locks forming ringlets on their own and her peircing green eyes smiling down at me.

"Gemma!" she finally confirms, making her way over to me.

I can't move. Its just so wonderful. Gone? No, shes here in the realms, with me. I can come visit her here, whenever.

How can Kartik see something bad about them when they can do so much good as bringing back loved ones that have passed? What grudges can he possibly hold? The Rakshana no longer matters to me. Kartik's warnings are nothing, he is nothing. Who is he to judge me and the realms?

Felicity, Ann, Pippa, and I can take care of ourselves. We don't need to Rakshana. We'll make our own conclusions on the realms.

They brough me to my mother, how can that possibly be wrong?

Now that I think it over... it is the same dream as before, but this time I've found her, in the realms, where everything is lovely and fair.