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Note: Finally done! This chapter has my Pokemon fan character in it. Volkner's cousin heard about Candice and Roark's recent trouble, and she decides to let Volkner know what he did to Candice. Unfortunately, in this story, Volkner might need a few things spelled out to him, and she has him figure things out on his own.
As for the Moss Rock, there are a few Moss fics that have Roark admiring/becoming obsessed over the Moss Rock(Orangen's "Of Rocks and Relationships" and Hollywing's "Constellation") so I figured I'd include something like it.
The "fanboy the rock" phrase came from an early page of the Mosshipping discussion on the Serebii forums.
(Olivine City, Johto)
"I talked to Candice," said Jasmine into a phone. "It seems that Volkner's relationship with Gardenia upset her."
"Freaking idiot," said the Gym Leader on the other end, rolling her eyes. "He never could tell the emotions of females."
"Darcy, I think it might be best if you talk to him."
Darcy held up a hand. "Hey, I'm his cousin," she said. "You're his friend. This whole Candice-Volkner-Gardenia-Roark thing would be taken seriously if he heard it from you. He'd think it was one of my lies."
"That may be, but I, unlike you, have challengers," said Jasmine. "The Gym starts up again tomorrow. Just pass along that you heard it from me."
(Oreburgh)
"Geodude, give them back," Roark commanded, holding out a hand for his glasses, which Geodude had swiped. The Pokemon was torn between handing them over to his irritated trainer or making a run for it.
"Geodude," Roark repeated. Geodude hesitated. He and Roark's other Pokemon had been playing tricks on their trainer, and sure, swiping the glasses wasn't the best idea any one of them had come up with, but heck, Roark needed a distraction. It was bad enough he had managed to escape them and go to Eterna Forest, even if it was just to fanboy a rock.
Finally, Geodude reluctantly handed the gym leader his glasses. Rampardos and Onix had much better ideas. Maybe next time, they'd let him try one instead of making him think for himself.
(Sunyshore)
Volkner was bored out of his mind until his cousin, a Dark-type user and gym leader in another region, came to randomly challenge him to a battle.
"Volkner!" said Darcy, her impatient mood switching to happiness in an instant.
"Don't you have your own gym?"
"Yes, but I have no challengers," said Darcy, slowly and clearly. "What fun is it being the final gym leader in a region if you don't have any free time?"
She had chosen to mention the one thing that annoyed him most about being the toughest gym leader in a region. Resisting the urge to tell her that the problem was that the toughest gym leaders had too much free time, he said "So you decided to annoy your cousin, is that it?"
"No, I call random people sometimes," said Darcy cheerfully. "As long as I know them." She scratched her Mightyena between the ears. "But Jasmine told me something about Candice that I figured you should know." She sounded worried, and Volkner didn't miss that.
"You're worried about Candice?" Volkner could have sworn his heart stopped beating before it remembered its job was to keep him alive. "Has something happened to her?" His previous annoyance with his father's sister's daughter disappeared. "Is it dangerous?"
Darcy looked him right in the eye. "Jasmine told me to tell you that Candice isn't very happy right now."
Volkner growled menacingly, knowing that threatening her was the only way to get her to make a tiny bit of sense. "Darcy, if you don't tell me what happened, I am going to set you up on a romantic date with Flint, just to see how long you'd last before-"
"I just freaking told you!" Darcy interrupted. "Candice is not too thrilled about the idea of you and Gardenia. Get it through your head, moron!"
It took a while for him to process her yelling, thinking at first that it was because of his threat. Then, he got it. And what he had to say was not the best remark.
"Holy (beep)."
Darcy snorted. "Nice choice of words, Volkner." Her voice was shaking with laughter.
For once, he had no comment, no comeback, no smart remark. He wasn't even listening.
In his carelessness, he had hurt Candice, and that was where his thoughts were.
"Remind me to thank you later," he said, and like a Mankey on drugs he was gone, leaving the Dark-type specialist blinking at the cloud of dust he had left behind.
"Mightyena," said Darcy, "didn't he just threaten to set me up with his friend to see how long I'd last before going insane? And now he's telling me to remind him to thank me later." She shook her head. "Now I'm positive I'll never understand him."
Mightyena growled in agreement.