Extra strength A/N of death: Ello! The FreakyBlondeKiisa here, reporting for duty. Yes, Aya, I'm actually off my butt and writing. In the immortal, foolish words of Coldstone ice cream: No, you're not dreaming. (Long story behind that one...)

I'll let you know that my fellow author ABANDONED me in the good old Land of Ten Thousand Lakes (where? Look it up!) to go to Chicago, see Wicked and drool over hot menz in Renaissance costumes (which she apparently has picture of that I haven't seen yet), one of which apparently locked eyes with her and gave her a hug and a carnation. FLOWERS. What am I doing? Watching BBC America and the Hindenburg episode of Mythbusters for the fifth time, trying to lose ten pounds, and writing our fanfiction.

glare at Amaya rant over. See Amaya, this is what happens when you leave me. I bore our brave, loyal, heroic readers with my ranting. On to reviews.

Tearworkshop: We... win... the... internet? glomp-hug-scream-hyperventilate-freakout YOU ARE MY FAVORITE PERSON NOW! Now that the internet belongs to me- I mean, us- I can begin my evil plans of evil! Yes!

Sulhadane: Do the fangirls get bishies? NO NO NO NO NO GOD NO gasp Amaya and I have intense paranoia of both Mary-sues and Mary-sue flamers. We hope to get them off our tail this way.

Amarissia: Carroll made my world.

Fine Little Voices: Are straight bishounen really so bad? It means the rest of us get a chance...

FreakyBlondeHair: Oh snap, it's me. :D

LifesLover: Yes, we are poetic. Theatric, romantic, and dramatic as well. Amaya's Birthday 'card' from me was sixteen of the eighteen verses of 'The Walrus and the Carpenter' formatted into 'The Kiisa and the Amaya' and my older sister's Christmas card a few years back turned her into the Jabberwocky. Larxene the win. And yes, Amaya is a review Scrooge. My chapters are so late because I'm lazy.

Lia Silverfrond: Thanx bunches!

Disclaimer: I could try to remember all the random crap I referenced in here... but... oh god, I don't have that memory. Let's just say I own NOTHING but Kiisa and be done with it, kay? Actually, Amaya even made up Kiisa's name... Oh God I'm poor.

Looks around That all? Yes? ONTO THE CHAPTER!

xxxxxBegin Operationxxxxx

Kiisa blinked in surprise. "Weird. I get the feeling I just spoke in verse for about five pages...and that someone took a wrecking ball to the fourth wall.

Amaya just rolled her eyes and decided not to bring up the day Kiisa spent a whole lunch hour singing everything she said in Carlotta-esque opera for fear of relapse. Beside, she was trying to revive Amarissia, who had taken it upon herself to prove that heterophobia can be as dangerous as homophobia.

That's when Kiisa noticed she was on a Gummi Ship. She decided not to make a fuss over her state of oblivion and just stare over the rail at the swishing water. Pretty water, really, bottle-glass green with floating summer leaves that rippled around the hull, reminded her of days with her grandparents in Logansport... This stuff happened to her all the time anyway. Just a few weeks ago she found herself in the Book Sanctuary (better known as the Library) instead of school because she just walked without paying any attention to where she was going...

A fresh bout of squeals brought Kiisa's wandering thoughts back to reality. Ah, Amarissia had been awakened. Apparently the first aid kits here contained batteries, gummi life savers, a hairbrush, a can of coca-cola, some headache medicine, duct tape, a yaoi fanfiction, and the ability to speak. It took soda, lifesavers, fanfiction, and a lot of screaming to revive Amarissia. She was now shakily sitting up and reading a copy of Alkalinity by Kanousei.

Kiisa turned to the fangirl with mid-length mousey hair and cute chunky glasses who leaned against the rail next to her. Kiisa cracked a lop-sided grin and asked, "So, where we goin'?" in the closest she could get to a New Zealander accent.

The fellow fan turned to her with an expression on her face that wasn't sure if it was shocked, confused, amused, or pained at the terrible imitation of Pippin. "Are you... trying to make a Lord of the Rings joke?"

Kiisa flushed in embarrassment and looked down. "Yeah, but I failed." After a pause, she said cautiously "But... well... I actually don't know where we're going..."

The girl smiled, "You're the new waitress, Amaya's friend, aren't you? I can tell by her description. Anyway, we're headed to Hollow Bastion."

"My reputation precedes me, I see. Hollow Bastion... isn't that the Castle where all the bishies are psychotic with dangerous looking hair and gigantic weapontry? Cuz they scare me. I like soft, cuddly bishies more..."

She laughed softly. "Yes, it is. Our current target is Cloud. I can't really symphasize with you, because my bishounen is Alucard from Hellsing..."

Kiisa's eyes practically bugged out of her head and she immediately switched from 'peaceful/moderately shy' to 'crazy freak out.' "HOLY LORD OF TAPE are you SULHADANE?"

Sulhadane instinctively backed up from the suddenly berserk Kiisa "Um, I think that depends on who's paying you to find out..."

"Ohmygod, YAY." This was the beginning of Kiisa's reputation as 'the fangirl of other fangirls.' "Hey, aren't the admin live-actioning Axelerate in a few days?"

Sulhadane smiled brightly. "Yeah, I'm so proud it was picked!"

"I know, it's one of my favorites! You're so lucky they're live-actioning it... um... whatever that happens to be..."

Sulhadane tipped her head to one side, questioning. "Tell me, does Amaya keep you in oblivion on purpose because It's too dangerous otherwise, or are you always like this?"

"No, as a rule, in a story or comic, it's a good idea to have one of your main characters slow at figuring things out or not in the know. This way, other characters have to explain things more thoroughly to this character, so consequently, the reader gets an in-depth explanation of the situation given to them. That's why the main character of his girlfriend/ best friend/ whatever always seems stupid," commented Kiisa casually, examining a piece of the recently destroyed fourth wall. There was a short silence common and almost patented for conversations with Kiisa. She then turned to Sulhadane with a bright smile. "So, what's live actioning?"

"Well. Um..." It took Sulhadane a second or two to recover. "One of the most popular fanfictions or doujinshi gets picked by the fangirl staff when business is slow, and they act it out all over the park like it's really happening. Some scenes take place on The Stage, some totally in the middle of the park. We've even kidnapped random bystanders for the sake of the story! Axelerate is coming up in just a few days, it's already cast, and I'm so exited!"

A huge grin had been slowly spreading across Kiisa's face as she listened to the explanation. "Tell me... even though it's cast, could Amaya and I take place in scenes that need extras?"

Sulhadane considered. "I'm not really in charge, but I don't see why not."

The smile exploded across Kiisa's face, revealing the much- accursed dimples. "Could we get a bike or something for Monde Race? Review Whore can be our Mechanic."

"Sure! We were low on people who wanted to brave the race anyway. I'll get you two set up!"

"HOLLOW BASTION, STRAIGHT AHEAD!" Shouted Review, who had been on look out as she raised her sword triumphantly in the direction of the castle.

"Down girl, no killing today, just capture and release," said Amaya, sounding like she said this every day.

Review pouted. "But... I require blood..."

"NO. BAD REVIEW."Amaya smacked her on the head with a rolled-up copy of Symphony. (Written by Axenator, BEST ZEMYX EVER. Subliminal messaging over.)

Sulhadane laughed. "I think I could get used to you guys."

Kiisa laughed with her and joined as they stepped off the boat onto dry land. She decided not to reveal that neither she nor Amaya could drive.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

A fangirl Kiisa didn't recognize was giving a pep talk, "Now then, Cloud is a medium-difficulty capture, unless in a submissive mood. But if caught in that case, we usually release him back into the wild, or more specifically, to Sephiroth, Zack, or Leon..." Kiisa didn't remember school pep talks being this interesting. She usually made it a point to space out during them, with got her into trouble in Phys Ed when the game suddenly started and she had no idea what they were playing. But I think we of the Fourth Wall Committee have pushed the point that Kiisa never knows anything far enough.

"Target Codename Cloud has been sighted on the east gardens of Location Hollow Bastion Castle. He is with Character Aeris, a normally docile but very protective older female character. Can be reasoned with, not to be underestimated. They are surrounded by approximately fifty Non-player Characters, codename Tourists, which can be used to our tactical advantage if thrown using the proper technique. I'm setting three troops on Mayhem Crew to disperse the crown, two more specifically to hold back Aeris, two for the capture with the Bishie Net, and remainder back-up with two troops ready to start the ship for quick escape. Volunteers?"

"MAYHEM CREW! MAYHEM!" shouted Review immediately. She didn't need to say it, though, it was always her job when Mayhem was needed.

Spots were quickly given out after that. As it was their first mission, Amaya and Kiisa were on back-up, emergency only. They were supposed to watch and learn.

Kiisa was watching- well, the sky, that is. There was a beautiful... bird, maybe, way up high, silver and black and flying quickly over here. Kiisa wondered how it could actually fly. Must be Disney Magic. Ominous music started playing on the hidden speakers, but the mission was started, and the music was drowned out by the chaos as Mayhem ran in with a loud "SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Amaya was watching how the capture worked, so that she might know what to do in the future. Glancing over at her idyllic friend, who seemed more interested in the sky, she followed her gaze and gaped.

"Sephiroth!"

Ok, ok, I get it, I'm a review scrooge, geeze Kiisa. How's this, I'm not holding chapters hostage anymore, but if you don't review I will find a rusty spork and hunt you down with it. And believe me, I will do it. (glares)

Ok, sheesh Kiisa, I get it. Please review or I will hunt you down with a rusty spork. Happy? Yes? Good.