A/N: Thanks for the reviews! Something's wrong with my email account, and it's not telling me when I get reviews and alerts blah blah blah but I checked on here, and snore...the point is, I know I got reviews so YAY! Thank you! I hope Jasper and Emmett's part is as satisfying as everyone anticipates.

Chapter 5

Deputy Masen and Deputy Hale (Edward and Rosalie)

As Edward drove the car, he looked into the dashboard camera and began talking. "So its day two of us being cops. We were all assigned different partners, and I am now partnered with Deputy Hale. To tell you the truth I wasn't too happy about being partnered with her, but Rosalie is usually a hardcore bitch to nice people and criminals alike, so I feel reasonably safe, and quite frankly I'm just happy I'm not with Jacob anymore."

Rosalie turned and glared at Edward. "Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I'm happy to know me being a bitch makes you feel safe."

Edward shrugged. "Hey, I'm just speaking the truth."

"Anyways on a more police related topic." Rosalie said, into the camera. "We just got a radio call, about something happening in the park. So Edward and I are going to go check it out."

"It's Deputy Masen." Edward corrected her.

Rosalie looked out the window and mumbled. "You're going to be DEAD-ward if you don't shut up."

"Oh, really?" Edward asked.

Rosalie smirked, "Let's just put on the sirens and go."

"Really? The sirens?" Edward asked surprised. "You're not going to pee your pants or anything?"

Rosalie looked at him confused for a second. "Pee in my pants? Wait. Jacob peed his pants, didn't he?"

Edward began laughing. "How did you guess?"

"Because it's Jacob!" Rosalie said.

They both sat there in silence for about two seconds, until they both burst out laughing and sped down the street. They arrived at the park, and both climbed out of the car.

"So what are we looking for?" Edward asked.

"An injured civilian." Rosalie answered.

"Oh civilian, nice choice of words." Edward said, astonished.

Rosalie scowled.

Edward chuckled silently until his eyes fell on an injured person. "Would this person happen to have an arrow stuck in his shoulder?"

Rosalie followed Edward's eyes. "I don't know lets check it out."

They both walked up to two grown men, one lying on the ground with an arrow sticking out of his shoulder, and another guy leaning over him.

"Did you guys call for the police?" Edward asked.

The non-injured guy stood up. "Uh yes, my friend is hurt."

Edward and Rosalie looked them up and down.

"Um sir, can you tell me why you are dressed like a knight, and an elf?" Rosalie asked. "I believe Halloween was over last month."

"We're playing Dungeons and Dragons." The guy answered. "I had to shoot him, or else I would have died."

Edward stifled a laugh. "Dungeons and Dragons?"

The guy looked at him with a serious look. "Yeah he was about to attack me with his sword so I defended myself with my magic arrow."

"Magic arrow?" Rosalie asked.

"Yes, magic arrow. Nobody or nothing can escape the magic arrow." The guy answered.

"Well you know your friend can press charges for that, right?" Rosalie asked.

The guy froze and looked between Edward and Rosalie.

"I was just defending myself." He finally answered.

"You were playing a game." Edward said.

"You don't understand!" The guy yelled.

"Calm down sir, I think right now you need to understand your friend is hurt because of you." Rosalie said.

"You can't take me!" The guy yelled. "I'm the miraculous elf, nobody can take me!"

"Calm down sir, or this will get ugly." Edward warned.

"You can't get me!" The guy yelled as he began running away. "I'm wearing a coat of escaping!"

"Come back here!" Edward yelled.

"I'm wearing a coat of escaping!"

Edward and Rosalie looked towards each other and rolled their eyes.

"Let's just get this guy to the hospital. We will find him later." Rosalie said.

Deputy Black and Deputy Cullen. (Renesmee and Jacob)

"We got a call about some guy dealing drugs on his front lawn." Renesmee said into the camera. "So Jake and I are going to go take care of it."

Jacob pulled up to a house where a guy was watering his garden.

"Sir." Nessie called out.

The guy looked Jacob and Nessie over.

"Is there a problem, officers?"

Jacob nodded. "Yeah. We heard that you're selling legal drugs."

"Jake, I think it's illegal." Nessie said.

Jacob shook his head. "No it's legal."

Nessie shrugged. "Whatever."

"I am doing no such thing." The guy answered.

"May we please search your house, sir?" Jacob asked

"Don't be polite." Nessie said to Jacob, and then looked back towards the guy. "We're searching your house!"

The guy turned to face the two, with his hose spraying towards them. Nessie and Jacob froze in their tracks.

"Put down the hose, sir!" Nessie yelled.

"This hose?" The guy yelled as he sprayed the water a little closer to the two.

"Yes, that hose!" Jacob finally yelled, shielding Renesmee.

"You don't want to get wet?" The guy asked.

"No, now put it down, already!" Nessie shrieked.

The guy smiled, and then slopped water over the two of them.

"We said put down the hose, you bastard!" Nessie yelled, as she took out her gun.

"You're really going to shoot this guy over a hose?" Jacob asked.

"I'm a police officer; I can do whatever I want!" Nessie declared.

"Okay, okay…I'll put the hose down." The guy said. While he slowly placed the hose on the ground, he leisurely started reaching for something else.

"Put your hands in the air, sir!" Jacob yelled.

The guy quickly grabbed his item, and held it up.

This time, it was Jacob who was quick to grab his gun, and point it at the man. "Put down the decorative garden gnome sir!"

"You're really going to shoot this guy for holding a gnome?" Nessie asked.

Jacob shrugged. "They freak me out."

Finally, they tackled the guy and found no signs of drugs even after searching for an entire hour.

"Damn! I really wanted to take him in." Jacob said.

"Well, he did have a weapon…two to be precise." Nessie said.

"That is true." Jacob said. "Good thinking, Ness!"

So Nessie and Jacob handcuffed the guy and threw him in the back seat.

"You're going to arrest me for holding a hose and a gnome?" The guy asked.

Renesmee and Jacob just ignored him as they drove to the police station.

Deputy Swan and Deputy Brandon. (Bella and Alice)

"This is kind of boring." Bella said as they drove down the street.

Alice sighed. "Just a little."

They drove around for a bit longer until Alice got a bright idea.

"I know!" Alice said as she pulled the cop car over. "Let's get our nails done."

Bella frowned, but then gave in, "Yeah, sure. I'm already bored out of my skull."

They both jumped out of the car and headed for a beauty shop.

"Wait." Bella said before they entered. "We don't have any money on us."

Alice stopped but then smiled. "We're cops! They have to give it to us."

Bella shrugged in defeat. "That's true."

Alice walked in and up to the counter.

"Two free manicures please." Alice said.

The girl looked them over, and then smiled. "Anything for our cops."

As they both sat inside, getting their nails done, there was a robbery across the street. All the customers looked towards Alice and Bella, waiting to see if they were going to do anything.

Alice shrugged. "One of the other Deputies will catch him."

Bella nodded. "Yeah, and maybe the robber needed the money."

"Want to go shopping after this?" Alice asked.

Bella sighed. "Yeah, sure. I guess I need new shoes to go with this uniform."

Twenty minutes later, they both walked out of the shop and went shopping.

"Wait." Alice said as she noticed something wrong. "Isn't that a parking violation?"

Bella studied the car, it was parked in two parking spaces, and the back end was sticking out. "Yes I think it is."

Alice smiled. "Let's write it a ticket!"

Bella clapped. "Okay, I haven't fought a real crime yet."

They both pulled out a pad of paper and began writing.

"What are the police terms for this?" Alice asked, as she held the pen to the paper.

Bella shrugged. "Um…back is sticking out, and your fat ass jeep is taking up two parking spaces, next time leave room for other people, signed the police."

Alice nodded as she wrote down every word. "Sounds good!"

They stuck it on the car, and walked away.

Bella and Alice slapped hands. "Another round of justice served!"

Deputy Whitlock Hale Cullen and Deputy Cullen (Jasper and Emmett)

"So you're telling me you would never do Aunt Jemima?" Emmett asked.

Jasper stared straight ahead as he drove. "No, maybe if she was a vampire, but even then, I could never leave Alice."

"But it's Aunt Jemima!" Emmett shouted.

Jasper rolled his eyes. "What's with you and Aunt Jemima?"

Emmett shrugged. "She is hot, and I used to love pancakes as a human, and she just so happens to go perfectly with them. You know what I'd do? Take her to my bed, pour syrup on her, and lick it off."

"That is disgusting!" Jasper said. "If you're going to lick anything off of anyone, or even talk about it, then say you're going to lick blood off of her. Not syrup, that is just nasty!"

"Whatever. Let's go hunt a little. All this talk about syrup made me thirsty." Emmett said.

"I'm down with that." Jasper agreed.

After a quick stop at a nearby forest preserve, they hid in a bush so they could catch speeders.

"Now we're real cops." Emmett said.

Jasper laughed.

Just as they were laughing, a car drove by.

Emmett rolled his eyes. "That was, like, the tenth non-speeding car, this is boring!"

Jasper shrugged. "Want to get them anyways?"

Emmett smiled. "Hell yeah. Turn on the sirens!"

As they chased the car down the road, Emmett picked up the radio. "Did you know you can talk into this, and the people outside the car can hear you?"

Jasper nodded. "Cool, now we won't have to get out of the car."

Emmett smiled and talked into the radio. "Pull over!"

The guy in front of them kept driving.

"I SAID PULL OVER, ASSHOLE!" Emmett shouted.

Finally he pulled over, and stepped out of the car.

Jasper took the radio out of Emmett's hand. "Step out of the car!"

The guy slowly stepped out of the car. "What did I do?"

"Let's have fun with this." Emmett said as he took the radio back. "Put your hands in the air, sir!"

"I'd like to know what I did." He said as he raised his hands.

"Now bend over, and put your hands on your butt." Emmett finished.

Jasper chuckled as he took the radio back. "And moo like the silly little fool you are!"

The guy's face flushed, but he did everything they told him.

Jasper and Emmett laughed their asses off as another car pasted them.

They eyed each other.

"Our next victim!" Emmett shouted with joy.

Jasper started up the car, and then sped down the street, leaving the guy mooing.

A/N: REVIEW. Please?