A/N: Is this really that OOC?? C'mon people! I'm just trying to be funny!
But thanks for reviewing, all the same.
CHAPTER 8
Emmett and Jasper
"I'm thirsty." Jasper complained as he and Emmett roamed the streets.
"Want to go to the zoo?" Emmett asked. "I'm sure we can get into the animal enclosures for free."
Jasper eyed him with uncertainty. "Why do you say that?"
Emmett tapped his gun. "We're cops."
Jasper face softened, his eyes now taking in the uniform. "Oh shit man, I totally forgot we were still doing this…"
"Well come on lets go try some free animals!" Emmett smiled, and the two headed in the direction of the local zoo.
About three hours later, the two exited the zoo after sampling countless endangered species. As they were walking towards the car which was parked outside a 7Eleven store, Emmett's eyes fell on a random girl.
"Hey, Jazz…don't we know that girl?" Emmett asked while pointing.
Jasper took in the stranger, his face brightening up. "I think we do."
Just as they were pondering who the girl was, she walked up to them so she could go inside the7Eleven.
"Excuse me miss." Emmett called out causing the girl to turn around.
"Yes." She answered.
"You look familiar." Jasper pointed out.
The girl smirked. "Is that like a pick up line?"
"No, you really do look familiar, have I seen you before?" he asked.
The girl shrugged. "I don't know where you hang out."
"Forks?" Emmett offered.
The girl shook her head. "No…never been there before."
"La Push?" Jasper asked.
"Nope." The girl said her head then popped up with a smile. "Do you know Johnny?"
Emmett eyed Jasper. "Is he emo? Or a cutter?"
Jasper returned Emmett's look with a dirty one. "You think all people who are emo and cut themselves have a club or something?" The he smiled towards the girl. "Nope, don't know Johnny."
"I don't know…maybe I just have one of those faces." The girl smiled.
"Yeah, that's probably it." Emmett said. "Well sorry to bother you, have a good, and safe day."
"Thanks, bye!" The girl chirped and then rushed into the store.
"She was nice." Jasper smiled as they began walking.
However, just as they were about to jump back into their car, they heard the girl shouting in the store.
"EVERYONE PUT THEIR HANDS UP!" The girl shouted.
Jasper and Emmett worriedly eyed each other.
"Wanted poster!" They both shouted, and then ran into 7Eleven to capture the criminal.
Renesmee and Jacob
"Nessie pull over; I think I see a crazy guy on drugs." Jacob pointed out.
Nessie looked out the window, her eyes landing on a guy who was running around in circles, with his mouth open.
"Wow…weird people in this place." Nessie mumbled, while she pulled the car over.
"Excuse me sir." Nessie called out as they approached the guy. The guy quickly stopped what he was doing and stared straight ahead.
"Hello officers…how are you today?" The guy asked.
"We're good, how are you feeling today?" Nessie asked.
The guy shrugged. "I could be better…"
"Are you under the influence, sir?" Jacob asked.
The guy eyed Jacob, his face beaming with delight. "No…but I'd like to be under the influence of you…"
Jacob cringed while Nessie stifled a laugh.
"You're not on any drugs?" Nessie asked.
"I sure am not." He answered while slapping Jake's ass.
"Hey!" Jacob squealed while he jumped and hid behind Nessie. "There will be no touching of the officers…"
"It's my way of saying hello." He said.
Nessie pushed him away from Jacob. "Well, think of another way!"
The guy stepped back raising his hands in defense. "Hey, hey, hey no touching me…like I said…it was my way of saying hello."
"Sir…you must tell me the truth. Are you on drugs?" Nessie asked.
"No…" He nervously replied. "But I can tell you what I am on..."
"What is that?" Jacob asked, while still keeping a safe distance.
"Skittles…" He replied. "I'm on Skittles…you should try them."
"By skittles do you mean, crack?" Nessie asked.
"No…but I do have a butt crack…" He giggled.
"Not funny, sir!" Nessie yelled.
"Hey…be nice…or I wont give you any of my skittles." He then eyed Jacob and smiled. "I will give you some though."
Jacob weakly smiled while he grabbed Nessie and pulled her in front of him.
"Dude, you can't hide from me…I'll find you." He said.
Nessie then moved out of the way, exposing Jacob. The guy lunged at Jacob, grabbing his leg.
Nessie smothered a giggle.
"Ness… help me…" Jacob whimpered, while he tried to run away.
Rosalie and Edward
"Drunk driver. Pull him over." Rosalie demanded while she filed her fingernails.
"How did you…" Edward asked amazed, his eyes moving from Rosalie who was paying no attention to anything, and then to the car in front of them who was swerving in and out of the lanes. Edward just shrugged and turned his sirens on, successfully pulling the guy over.
"Step out of the car sir." Edward said, once he was at the window.
"What…why…." The guy slurred his words. "I didn't do anything wrong."
"Just please step out of the vehicle." Edward ordered.
The guy stepped out, his body swaying back and forth.
"Have you been drinking tonight?" Edward asked.
"Nothing…" They guy said with a hiccup.
"It doesn't smell like nothing." Edward said.
"I swear!" He said. "Trust me…do I look like I would drink and drive?"
"By the way you're swaying and slurring your words, I would say yes." Edward replied.
"Oh come on…you're only basing it on two facts."
"I know how we can tell." Rosalie chimed in while skipping to the car, "Edward, what's he thinking about?"
Edward and the guy looked towards Rosalie with questioning looks.
"Um…cheesecake…and Harry Potter," Edward rubbed his temples, "Look, Rosalie! I can't tell! His thoughts are as muddled as his words."
Rosalie frowned first, and then she smiled, "Hm…there is another way…"
"How?" Edward asked.
Rosalie smirked. "Bring him to the back of the car."
Edward sighed, but did as he was told. "Okay…so now what?"
"Okay tough guy, repeat everything I do." Rosalie said to the driver.
"Okay…"
She smiled and then started dancing, while speaking in a rhythm. "Heel to toe, heel to toe."
"Easy…" The guy said, he then mocked Rosalie's moves, while speaking the same way. "Heel to toe, heel to toe."
Rosalie clapped. "Wow very good. Let's try another."
She stood in position again, and then began. "Heel to toe, heel to toe, touch your nose and shake your hips."
"Easy!" The guy said, and then did the same thing.
Rosalie watched on in delight, her eyes then caught Edward, who was doing the same moves.
"Tada!" The guy said. "Okay…can we stop now? I'm really wasted."
Rosalie laughed. "Aha! I caught you."
"Oh man…shit no, I mean…I- oh fine. Take me to the drunk tank." The guy said.
"Twinkle toes, cuff him." Rosalie grinned towards Edward who was caught off guard in a dance move.
"Yeah sure…" Edward cringed, and then dragged the guy to the cop car.
A/N: I couldn't think of anything for Alice and Bella in this chapter. Sorry. Two more chapters to go. Then I'm sending them to Las Vegas! HINT HINT.
REVIEW. Let me know what you think.