And on today's menu, our special is...

Brotherly Bonding with a side order of schmoop. Bon appetit.

Dean eased onto the familiar couch with a sigh.

"So. Now what?"

"Now, I guess we wait," Sam replied, hanging up his coat. "They said it would be a little while before we got the results." He pulled Dean's leather jacket off of the arm of the chair and hung it in the closet beside his own. "You hungry?"

"Not really."

"Should probably eat something, man. We haven't had anything since this morning."

Dean gave a nod. Not that he felt like eating. He was just too tired to argue about it.

Besides, it would give Sam something to do and frankly, his brother's nervous energy was driving him nuts. Kid hadn't stopped moving since Dean had first appeared in his living room. It was a wonder he hadn't keeled over from exhaustion.

"Jess?" Dean asked, raising his voice so his brother could hear him from the kitchen.

"It's Monday. She's at work."

Dean heard the sound of cabinets opening. Clattering dishes. "Monday, huh," Dean repeated to himself. Right, normal people went to work on Monday. Not that he'd know. Hunting didn't exactly follow the standard work week.

"Probably a good thing," Sam added slowly. "Give her some time to cool off. She was kind of…pissed this morning. We didn't really get that chance to talk."

.Dean winced in sympathy. "So, uh… What about you? Don't you have… work?"

"I took some time off."

Dean hadn't really given much thought to Sam's life before, but he realized now how long his brother had been wrapped up in 'Operation Dying Dean." Thought about the number of days since he'd shown up in Palo Alto. The time in Nebraska. The days since…

"You can do that?" Dean asked. "You know. Take all that?"

"Don't worry about it," Sam said casually, returning with two bowls and a loaf of bread under his arm. "I have personal days saved up."

Sam placed a bowl in front of him. Sat down beside him.

Dean looked down at the offering.

Soup. Great.

He was officially back on the invalid list.

"Sorry," Sam said sheepishly, noting the look on his brother's face. "S'the only thing we had in the house. I should probably go shopping later."

"Naw. It's great," Dean said softly. "Really," He picked up a spoon. Took a few mouthfuls as if to prove his point.

Sam smiled. Dug into his own bowl.

Dean watched him out of the corner of his eye. Set the spoon down.

He cleared his throat.

"Hey, uh, Sam…"

His brother looked up.

Dean rubbed his neck awkwardly. Jesus, he was never good at this crap. "You know, when I came here, I never meant to, complicate stuff..."

"Dean."

"If I'd known it would turn into all this, I never would have–"

"Hey. 'Nough with the guilt trip, okay? Look, we've been over this, Dean. Everything I'm doing, I'm doing because I want to. No apologizing." He raised an eyebrow. "Cause frankly, you suck at it."

"Yeah," Dean huffed. "Yeah, guess I do." He let the soup drain off his spoon. Swirled it around. "So…Jessica was pissed, huh?"

Sam cut some slices of bread. "You could say that. You know you've only seen sweet supportive, nurturing Jess, but I swear, man, she's got a temper that would make Dad proud."

"Feisty, huh?" Dean nudged his brother's knee lightly with his own. He shook his head. "Hell, what d'you you expect? People get curious about things. They have questions. Remember what you were like as a kid? Couldn't get you to shut up."

"Come on. I wasn't that bad."

"Dude. When you were 10, I almost tied you up and tossed you in the trunk of the Impala just to get some friggin' quiet."

"Wait…" Sam's brow furrowed as he placed some bread near his brother's bowl. "I think I remember that. Dad came in and caught you digging the rope out of the storage chest."

They both looked at each other and broke out in a laugh.

"Yeah, the old man was not amused," Dean said, scratching his forehead. "Though secretly, I think he thought it was a good idea."

Sam grimaced. "Well, Dad's sense of humor left a lot to be desired."

"He did his best, Sam."

"Sure." Sam ripped apart a slice of bread. Let the pieces fall into his bowl. Watched them slowly seep up the moisture. "It was real funny when he said not to let the door hit my ass on the way out."

"Hey..."Dean warned.

"Forget it, it's okay. I get it."

"You know things weren't that simple, man… "

"What about you, Dean?" Sam asked quietly. "Were they simple for you? Last couple years... I mean, Dad, I get. But you…"

Dean pursed his lips. Looked down at his own bowl. "Works both ways, dude. You coulda picked up the phone."

Sam tossed another tossed piece of bread. "I did." The crumbs landed on the surface of the soup, slowly sank under the hot broth. "Once. In September. Right after the new semester started."

September? Dean thought back the last couple of years.

"Bobby answered," Sam continued, slowly. "Said that you and Dad…you both'd been hurt on a hunt. That it went bad. That you both were going to be okay, but...it was bad."

Oh man. September. The werewolf pack.

"After that, I just, couldn't' do it," he went on quietly. "Knowing that one day you wouldn't pick up the phone. That one time you wouldn't be okay. So..."

He hadn't.

Dean swallowed. Well, as long as they were all caring and sharing.

"I didn't want to be the reason," he said quietly.

Sam's brows drew together.

"You asked me why I didn't call," Dean explained. "When you got that scholarship, things were just… Different. Just like that, you had a chance. The whole college deal. What it meant. A career, stability. I didn't want to be the reason you gave that up. I didn't want to be the one to tie you down."

Sam shook his head. "It never had to be a choice, Dean. I could've had both. Had my family and still had my own life." He swallowed past the lump in his throat. "Normal people have both."

Dean felt his own throat tighten.

"I wanted both," Sam finished quietly.

"Dammit," Dean muttered.

"What?"

"We aren't going to have to like…hug or some shit now, are we?"

A smile flickered across Sam's face.

"How bout a beer, instead?"

Dean sighed. "You are a good man, Sammy."

As he rose to go to the kitchen, Sam paused. Turned to look at his brother. Squeezed his shoulder lightly.

Dean nodded. Watched his brother walk away.

Sam wanted both. His own life, sure, but one that included his brother.

A nice thought.

Dean just hoped it was possible. For both their sakes.

-tbc