Part Three

Gackt

I wonder how many steps. Ten, or eleven, is it? Hm. I should try it.

Maybe no one would notice that I drag a man behind myself on an airplane, heading for the toilet. I would bundle him there, and rape him. Nice plan, and thrilling too. I look at Hyde who's sitting beside me, gazing out the window. He isn't observing now... it would be the perfect time. When he'd return to reason, he'd already been giving himself to me excitedly.

Maybe it's twelve steps. Too much. It'd be ostentatious.

As usual, life stood beside me, and we will spend these couple of days together, téte-a-téte. Dear Tetsu couldn't come. I'm sooo sorry.

After my blond shook me off at my house, I was squibbing for a couple of days. And here's the result. We called each other almost every day, and I felt the relief in his voice when I told him that I can come. Oh, he will be definitely relieved, when I put things to right. His thing... hm...

We're landing soon. We won't have time to go out to the field today. I'm sure we'll have more interesting things to do. If it depends on me... but unfortunately, it depends on him...

We aren't talking to each other. We're both tired, not surprising after so many performances. Not mentioning those stupid talk-shows. This relaxation will be gratifying. At last I can rank off this always spinning stars' world. I've never said I hate it, but I just can't stop, not even when I'm tired to death. I hate days like that.

The captain says we're landing in the next twenty minutes. Twenty-five is more correct, as I can say now. Taking our luggage, we go under controll: „Why do you want to visit this country?" The answer: to fuck.

I guess this answer wouldn't really get my dear colleague's pleasure, so I say the other truth. Forty-five minutes later we're already heading for the villa.

Hyde

As I watch the land covered in a gross, almost untouched shroud of snow, the virgin whiteness strokes me down unwittingly. Now, for some days, I'll have time for myself at last. Some days when no newsmen will jump in front of me, when I won't have to be afraid of being followed by fans, and when I won't have to suit anyone's requirements.

Now that I'm here, I can feel how much I missed this feeling. Disposing of the always swarming Japan, the problems… I had too much strain these days, maybe that's why I had imaginations that just can't be real.

When we first spoke about going boarding together with Gackt, I had a sudden feeling that spending these days together, téte-a-téte, wouldn't be a good idea. His glances he looked over me again and again with were much equivocal, although it was possible that only I imagined more, as he nearly passed up. His voice was indolent, even languid.

I haven't a clue, just how could it come to my mind, that he's interested not only in my profession... that could came from being exhausted, and being popular, when you can't always tell who is interested in you in what way. Maybe it's because Gackt really is attractive, and that had an effect on me. And well... also my sexual life, which is getting infrequent lately.

Whatsoever, he sat beside me on the airplane, and as I didn't feel his look on me, his presence was surprisingly reposeful. Not that we spoke a lot. Being silent was just good with him.

At last, Tetsu couldn't come, which is a pity because we haven't gone anywhere double having fun for a long time. For too long time... in the past few years if I had time for relaxation, I always went somewhere with Megumi. Of course, I like being with her too, but I could never let myself go by her side. Maybe here is the point when the difference between men and women shows itself.

And now, since we're together it's the first time I went anywhere without her. If we didn't part as we did, maybe I would have pang of conscience, but as it is, I guess being apart for a couple of days is good for both of us. For me certainly. The problem wasn't that she didn't want me to go, but the style she spoke to me. She's been deducing her fits of nerves too many times to make me pray for a couple of days' serenity.

I can see the villa from the car's window. I take a look at Gackt, but he's resting his head on the seat with closed eyes. He really has a beautiful face... and it's like he has some mysterious insensitivity on it. I wonder what he's hiding behind that always un-find-out-able mask of his. I have a thought that there is much more than what he shows to the outside world.

Maybe these days I'll have an opportunity to get know something of the real Gackt. The man, not the showman. Because, in some way or other, there definitely is something in him what holds me spellbound...

Gackt

We took off the suitcases. We both took our rooms. They're side by side. Perfect. I think I'm going to feel lonely in the evenings, and I'm going to desire company.

It was getting dark.

The evening won't be without any program. I quickly toss off my clothes, and put on swimming trunks. A bit of swimming... and a bit of sauna never hurts.

I knock on Hyde's door. He opens it within seconds.

He looks over me confusedly. Only my shorts hides some parts of me. And here is the problem: it hides the main point.

"What do you think about a little bathing?" I ask while getting off all his clothes with my eyes.

"Well... OK" he said while measuring me involuntarily. "Just five minutes, then I'll join you."

Five minutes are long time. I don't move. I want to look at him while he's dressing.

He stares at me helplessly, like he doesn't know what to do with this situation. Then he shrugs almost undetectably, and steps away from the door.

"Right, I'll really be quick" he bends down to the suitcase, and starts to search in it. "Meanwhile, would you light a cigarette for me?"

Which cigarette does he mean? Because, if he really starts to take off his clothes in front of me, I will light his cigarette... but then my own will flame too.

I get the cigar box off my pocket, and take two of them. I stick both of them into my mouth, and they ignite in the same moment as the flame hits them.

Hmm... I draw both of them. I need it at least for the sight.

He takes off his T-shirt, and... oh, fuck... this guy is beautiful... I want to fuck him, now... here... forthright...

He enamels his blond ringlets off his face, and throwing his shirt onto the bed, suddenly vanishes into the bathroom. As I'd waken from consternation, he's already standing in front of me in a white robe.

Who was that asshole, who put a bathroom into this fucking room? I'd shut him there for years!

But no problem, Hyde... you haven't got a clue about what are you going to get from me today!

"Then, can we go?" I ask.

He nods and we head for downstairs. I let him in front of me. I flatly hate this robe on him: it hides his attractive shape.

When we reach, we get into the pool. Swimming for awhile, mentioning some subjects which are only for a couple of words. An hour goes away.

"I suppose the sauna is already warmed up. Join me, if you'd like to" I call to him to the other end of the pool.

He nods and says he'll follow me in a minute. He doesn't know that he facilitates my plan with that.

I step into the spacious wood cabinet. I water the stones, then I simply pull off my trunks. I lay my towel on the top bench, then I lay myself onto it. Totally naked. Now only my sweet victim is missing...

Hyde

I stand under the stone-cold water before following him to the sauna. It burns my skin, but still it gratifies me for some reasons. For some reasons I don't want to think of...

When I finally can't stand the coldness, I turn off the tap, and snatching my towel I go into the sauna. Then I hope I'd stayed under the shower for more minutes. There lays in front of me Gackt, Tokyo's uncrowned idol – stark naked.

For a moment I can't even breathe. A thought comes into my mind, saying it should be culpable of punishment for someone being this good-looking. I don't know if I ever had such strange thoughts of a man, but sexuality is just swelling from him.

I take a deep breath and close the door behind me. I just can't turn over to run back under the water, not as if I wouldn't want to do it. I let the towel go from my waist, but I wouldn't want to take off my trunks. For safety's sake. I lay the towel on the bench under his, and fling down to it. I don't want to see it. I don't want to look at it. I still feel enough of his presence...

"Don'tcha feel warm in that pants?" I hear his voice.

Gorgeous. He doesn't make it easy for me. Moreover.

And now, what should I say to this? Anyway, who would ask such a question in a fucking sauna?!

"I don't think I'd sweat less if I put it off..."

Oh, great. I couldn't think of a more mistakable sentence.

"I mean I feel better this way" I add quickly.

"Yeah... laying is better than standing..." he says just to himself.

I even don't have the strength to swallow...

I guess I'm really going crazy. Like since I entered this villa, I have been dripped to another world, where a beauty-skinned, luring to sin bishounen is haunting. Me, Hideto Takarai, who thought of himself that he already gratified his passions for bisexuality in his Laruku-period.

Here he lies above me, and despite I can't see him, I could tell almost exactly how the sweatdrops arch down on his bronze brown skin... The air I breathe is filled with eroticism, and it spreads over me unstoppably.

"Maybe it's truly too hot here" I say after a couple of really long minutes. "I think it was enough of sauna for me today. You stay?"

"I stay for a couple of minutes. Just go, it's okay" he looks at me investigatively.

"Then see you upstairs" I answer, then I grab my towel and leave the sauna.

Well, maybe the word 'run away' would fit here much more. I desire two things now: a cold, stone-cold shower, and a cigarette. Maybe two.

I step under the water again to cold my flushed body, and last but not least my distressingly perverted thoughts.

Gackt is a man. Try to neglect the fact that he is crucifyingly attractive. I am too. A man who has a wife and a child. A man who's not in his twenties to jump on anyone who is just a bit good-looking. In the past few years I felt I had grown up enough to be able to settle down by someone's side, as in the Laruku's first years I had enough time to luxuriate. Maybe it was even too much. The sex beyond measure, the frowzy nights' long line can also make you apathetic. After some time it just doesn't give anything, just gets of you. You loose yourself within the nameless arms with no face. And you're searching for something... or someone...

When I met Megumi, after so much time I felt serenity. Something that I needed, and it quieted my disgruntled soul. And now this serenity was aroused by a dark-eyed demon, closed into a beautiful man's body...

I don't have any idea what will I do with Gackt for four more days, if on the very first day I'm this psyched out of him...

When I already feel like freezing to death, I close the tub and step out of the shower. I wipe myself with broad, reckless movements, then slipping into the cover, I head for the living room.

I fill a glass with wine for myself, then I go sprawling on the white leather sofa, lighting a cigarette. Smoke gratifies me. It makes me slack. Exiles the desperate thoughts from my head. So, when after some minutes he enters the living room again, I can look at him calmly again...

"You're not in royal spirits" he looks over me as I'm lying on the sofa.

"Yes, we can say I'm tired" I smile slowly. "My body and my soul... and the journey was also long. So forgive me if today I won't be a really enjoyable company" I laugh. "But I'll try my best."

"Turn over please" he asks me solemnly.

Uh-huh, good. How was it about that being slack by soul thing?

"Why?" I glance at him grinning while finishing my cigar into the ashtray.

"Just turn over" he says and vanishes at the bathroom.

Why do I feel like it isn't supposed to end well? Yet, I obey him, not that I'm sure that it's a good idea, because I'm not. With a deep sigh I roll on my stomach, and put my head on my folded arms.

Within moments, he appears with a tube of cream and stands above me. I swallow, but my throat is strangely dry. This isn't what I think it is? He sits on my back with one movement. Shit: it's really what I think it is. He grabs my robe at my neck and mellowly butts in under it. He starts to pull it off slowly, then I suddenly notice that I'm already lying half-naked, Gackt straddling on my waist. I feel a cold touch on my back, then his fingers start to disperse the cream on it. I go goosebumps everywhere he touches me. His movements are silky yet strong as he strokes me with his palm.

I moan involuntarily of the good feeling when he starts to massage my shoulders. My brain starts to turn off. I hide my face between my arms in order to hide the enjoyment what shows up on it. What he does to my body is unbelievable despite it's just a massage. I don't care why he does this, just do more... It slacks me and gets me into prickling fever at the same time... Damn, what could he do in bed, if he can wake my senses with just a little massage?

I don't want to think about this... moreover, I don't want to think... just floating senselessly in a world where nothing exists but my body and these endearing fingers...

Gackt

Married? Tut! Who cares? Everyone needs a bit of vodka sometimes beside Bailey's. So I'll be his vodka.

I softly caress his backbones, from his neck to his waist. I feel him shake. Oh yes, these were the effects I wanted to take off him. My fingers walk by his shoulders. Sometimes, just touching his tresses, I root into his hair.

I hear him moaning silently, he hides his face between his hands, like he could hide anything with that. He just doesn't realize that now it's not his naive wife... he won't shaft me. I'm a man too, I know well what does every single reaction mean.

His white skin is shining of cream. So attractive... so tempting for a kiss. Maybe my head starts to move unconsciously to his back. I just want a soft kiss... to give him an innocent touch that would make him more flushed... and me too. Millimeters separate my lips from his back. I hesitate. If I start something now, I'm afraid I couldn't stop myself. Maybe he feels my breath on his back... maybe he knows what I'm about to do.

I don't do it.

Instead, I lean to his ear, and whisper into it:

"Does it feel good?"

"Uh-huh..." he moans faintly. "I don't remember when I was last massaged.

I can massage him on other places too, if he feels like...

"Tell me where you'd like..." I whisper into his ears while stroking his back softly.

"There at my neck... is a point... that's... a bit of in a gnarl" he says spasmodically, and he doesn't lift his head yet. I slither my hands there and start to fray it with my fingertips.

"Yeah... there..." he sighs.

Oh yeah... when I'm in him, I'll hear the same sigh... I'm looking forward to it.

I don't wanna get my fingers off him... it's too good to touch him... it makes me feel too good...

I get over myself, and put his robe back on him. Then I lean into his ear again.

"Good night."

And I get off him and leave the room without a word.

He's within my hands...

"Wait..." I hear as he calls after me. I turn over curiously, and pull up my eyebrows questioningly. Maybe...

For a while he remains silent, just looks at me investigatively, while I look back at him waitingly. I can't read anything from his face.

"Thank you for the massage" he says at last silently, when the silence starts to be too long. "It really went a long way to me."

I smile.

"You're welcome."

He doesn't know yet that he will get a much more long way going massage from me...