This marks my 16th story on ff about MAR! (I really need to write some ff about something else lol) Fact: It also was the first time I knew how to use the 'sticky keys' function on the computer.
Fact: It actually took me three goes to get this chapter right. I was originally trying for a Rolan version of 'Lost Valentine' and 'The Recruitment of the Ducks', but thought this story could be something special... So hence Alviss. (I do hope I kept him as IC as possible)
This also is a wonderful day for me! I've watched episodes 1-15,29,30,70 and 71! (www(dot)animecrazy(dot)net; it also has lots others) and my friend has gifted me with 5 different yaois! XD Anyway, I do hope you like my story and continue to read my stuff. Enough of my ramblings, time for the story! - Reg

Chapter One. There is going to be 13 or so chapters in all. Hope you RR and Like!

Random Quote: "O that this too, too solid flesh would melt, thaw and resolve itself into a dew..." - Shakespeare's Hamlet

A Meeting of Fate

The steely grey sky threatened to dump snow on the empty graveyard below. A single snowflake fell from the sky, twirling and dancing, then landing on a large grey tombstone. A lone figure sat silently, watching the snow fall like icing sugar on the ground at his feet.

Despite the freezing the weather, the person knelt before this stone, holes torn in his raggedy clothes, bruises and cuts all over his exposed skin. His overshadowed eyes were brimmed with tears that were about to stream down his cheeks. It had been ten long years and his soul was empty. Rolan had become a hollow shell of a man.

He didn't even look up as the sound of the rusty old gate opening pierced the silence. He was too emersed in his memories. The good, the bad and the wonderful. His memories of his father-figure, his leader, his saviour, his life: Phantom.

Everyday for ten years he had come here to be with Phantom. He curled his feet under himself. "Phantom... Phantom..." he moaned like a wounded dog. "Phantom come home. You promised me that you would be here for me forever..."

Tears started to fall and he cried hysterically. A hand was placed lightly on his shoulder and he started. A gust of wind blew a flurry of snow around him as he gazed up hopelessly at the stranger.

"What happened to you, Rolan?" he spoke.

Rolan's lifeless eyes stared into the man's deep blue eyes. He was a familiar man dressed in a woollen overcoat with blue spiky hair. Rolan suddenly remembered him in a surge of fury. It had been awhile, but he still despised everything about him. "What do you want?" he snapped.

"Why are you out here in the cold?" Alviss's voice was deeper, but he still spoke in that detached, emotionless voice.

"Why do you care?"

Alviss sighed. "Rolan, you've been visiting this grave for ten years. I've watched you each and every time."

"So what?" Rolan stood and glared at Alviss with a look that could melt the snow.

"Rolan, you're pathetic." The cruel words stung Rolan. "You've come here everyday to seek comfort from a man dead and buried in the cold ground."

"Go away," Rolan's voice cracked with emotion as he was torn between grief and rage. How dare he come and say such hurtful words to me! Rolan felt tears in his eyes again and he suddenly felt revolted at himself. I am pathetic, he realised, hopelessly collapsing to the ground. He wished the ground would just swallow him or that he would melt.

"You're pathetic because you trust a dead man to give you happiness."

Rolan shook his head. "Just go! Leave me to die here! Then I can be with Phantom forever!" he screamed. Silence pursued his frantic words, but still Alviss stood there. He sighed.

"I'm not leaving you, Rolan," he said.

"Why not? You did before! You hate me and I you, so just go away and leave me to die."

"I left you before and now, I have to admit, I see that was a mistake. I left you to become what you are now, and you never deserved it. Even if you loved a man who murdered thousands in cold blood. Even if you played along as his pawn in his devious plans. Even if you knew what you were doing was wrong... I shouldn't have left you."

Rolan felt nothing. He was tired from his continuous hurting and grieving. His body ached with longing. All he wanted was someone to embrace him, to hug him. Tears were flowing.

"But I'm not to blame entirely. Part of the blame goes to you," Alviss continued coldly. "You're pathetic because of your childish dependency on a man that never loved you. He was lying to you and you readily ate the shit that poured from his mouth, gorging yourself on his false pretences just because he made you feel special. You were so scared of loss that you resented the living, becoming no more better than Phantom himself."

Rolan listened to Alviss's words. He knew they were cruel and mean, but he felt warmth from them. It was as if he was saying loving words instead. He raised his head and stared at into Alviss's eyes. He thought he saw loving concern there, but then again he saw loving concern in those dead hazy purple eyes...

'Kill them for me, Rolan,' he had said. Rolan shook his head. 'Look at me,' the conceited man demanded. Rolan looked up. His hazy eyes were frightening at first, but the longer he stared into them the more warmth and love seemed to awaken in the fog of death. 'You will do as I say,' he said resolutely. The force of the words and the fanciful idea of Phantom's favour, the longing that echoed his empty heart demanded his eyes. 'I owe you everything and anything,' the child Rolan had said. 'I will do as you wish.'

Blood was on his hands. Blood of the innocent, the weak and the helpless┘ Rolan looked down at his hands. He had once been innocent... weak and helpless. He had wanted to die. When had he wanted eternity over death?

"I came here to apologise. I gave you up as a loss cause and in doing so, I cursed you to be one." Alviss bent down and took Rolan's head into his hands. "But I will only help if you were wrong. Wrong about Phantom, wrong about loving and trusting him and wrong about eternity."

"Eternity is for those that deserve it," Rolan sniffed. "I no longer crave for anything. My very soul has been slaughtered, my heart destroyed. I don't even feel happy anymore. I lost my soul, my heart, my sanity when he died. Everything died with him."

Alviss sighed again and let go of Rolan's head. "You can't even admit you were wrong," he said with great disgust. "Goodbye, Rolan." He got up to leave.

A sudden urge of desperateness gripped at Rolan. He cried out like a child and grabbed Alviss's leg. "Don't go, don't go! You can't leave me! I was so scared, so alone! You talked to me; you can't leave me to die in silence! I'm still afraid of dying!" he implored. Alviss examined him with cold eyes. "I admit it! I killed for him! I fought for him! I was in love! His power, his eyes... His eyes seduced me! Please don't leave me! I'm afraid." Alviss regarded him. "I'm sorry. Forgive me... I was wrong," Rolan sobbed, collapsing again, giving up.

The cold winter's day was his salvation. Here he was to die. Blackness engulfed his senses and he embraced it with open arms. He wasn't afraid.