Author's Note: Hello all, and welcome to yet another chapter of Living Arrangements. This week's chapter has been inspired by a play that I saw performed at our school by a theatre troupe. It was a very touching plotline and the emotional performances had been done so spectacularily that my heart could not help but feel warm and sympathetic. On another note, this is one of the final chapters of Living Arrangements. So far I have the plan to have 19 chapters (including an epilogue), but since I really wish to end it off at 20, perhaps I will think up another idea for another chapter. Either way, please just enjoy this chapter as I have taken special care to write it, and it holds a special place in my heart. It is sad and heart-rending, but not particularily angsty. You shall see what I mean as you read on.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Free from her shift, Rin headed back to her current apartment, taking care to use her time wisely. By the way the older nurse had been looking at him, Kakashi seemed to almost be ready to be released, and Rin definitely did not wish to encounter him during this – not that she thought he'd mind all that much; it just didn't seem right, that was all.
Upon reaching the apartment, she hurriedly stuck her key in the lock, gave it a rapid turn, and shut it noisily behind her. Walking over to the kitchenette, Rin removed three large cardboard boxes, which had all been folded up, and proceeded to clear her space – carelessly putting in clothing, weapons, and all other necessities. With her efficient, fast-paced efforts, she managed to clear the space in less than two hours, and now worked on moving her boxes from their current place to her desired destination.
As she hauled them to and fro, her mind began to wander and wonder guiltily if maybe she should stay at the apartment until Kakashi was back – in order not to give him another cause of worry. Still, if he had resolved to depart directly to the border upon his release from the hospital, then he wouldn't be back for another few days, at the least – and that was more than Rin cared to wait. Nevertheless the guilty side of her won, as always, and she opted for a less alarming and more fitting way to take her leave. Yes, she would stay elsewhere, but instead of leaving him to wonder about her whereabouts, Rin would be kind enough to leave a notice to, well, notify him that she had not been kidnapped or killed or any such horrendous thing.
Before leaving with the last box, she did just that. Pulling out a notepad, Rin scribbled down a note for Kakashi and attached it with some piece of tape – that she'd later discover held together the '7' button on the microwave – to his door. Sparing one last look at the apartment she had called home for the past few months, Rin turned around and bounded out the door.
When she finally reached her new residence with the last of the boxes, and saw that no one had taken anything inside, Rin knocked carefully on the door, fidgeting from one side to the other as she waited. Moments later, an older woman with chestnut hair opened the door, her eyes widening in shock as she regarded Rin with something akin to amazement. "Rin, where have you been? I've been so worried!" The woman cried out, reaching out with her arms and taking the young girl before her in an embrace.
Rin shifted nervously and uncomfortably in the hug, letting her arms hang by her sides, her eyes staring directly over the woman's shoulder. "Hi mom," she replied, neither responding to nor breaking the embrace she was currently being held in.
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Kakashi walked to his apartment at a leisurely pace; he had just been released from the hospital minutes before, and was told that Benjiro would be released the next morning. Taking this information into account, Kakashi decided to postpone his trip back to the border one more day, and just spend the rest of this day resting. He was a little wary to go to his apartment – especially since his weary mind and body really did not wish to partake in another argument with Rin – but rationally, he had decided that going home could not be avoided. He may not have been sure that he was ready to apologize, but Kakashi was sure that he was ready to do anything – save lay down and die – to avoid another confrontation.
Standing before the door to his apartment, he established that there would be no dreaded confrontation – the note taped to his door indicated this rather clearly. "Thanks for letting me stay with you, but I had to leave. I'm tired of running away. Again, thanks for everything. Be safe. See you around. Rin." He read the note sticking to his door aloud.
So it was back to living with himself. Kakashi couldn't say that he was thrilled at the idea, but if she insisted that she had to leave, he couldn't have stopped her. Although he knew this as a fact, he could not quite stop the dejected sigh from escaping his lips or the slight slumping of his shoulders at the news that he'd be living alone. Again.
Unlocking his door, and turning the knob, some shred of hope still dwelled within him that perhaps it was all a joke to scare him, to get him to apologize and not leave for the border – although he would go regardless. Said hope however died as quick as it birthed, the empty open drawers, the absence of a second mattress, and the lack of feminine hygiene products in the washroom all contributing factors leading up its extinguishing and eventual death.
Leaving early for the border was starting to look like a mighty tempting idea.
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Finally letting go of her daughter, Rin's mother looked past the girl and straight to the boxes containing her belongings, and surprisingly, a mattress. Her mother silently went over and began to lift one of the boxes, to which Rin protested, "Hey mom! Don't lift them! They're too heavy for you!" Rin's mother could only raise a questioning eyebrow at her daughter, making Rin's cheeks tinge pink in embarrassment.
Once all the box lifting was competed, and the two females were sitting in the main room unpacking, Rin's mother took the initiative and pushed her daughter into making conversation. "So Rin honey, how are you?"
"I'm ok. Tried, but ok."
"Where have you been staying all this time? I hope you haven't been sleeping on the streets or anything. It's dangerous out there."
Rin froze. She couldn't tell her mother that all this time she had been living with Kakashi; the older woman would have an absolute fit! She had to think up an excuse, and fast. Or better yet, she could tell the truth – so she'd feel less guilty about leaving her mother – yet only tell part of the truth. "Of course I haven't been sleeping on the streets. I've been staying at a friend's." Well, it was the truth, wasn't it?
"You really should have let me know. I was worried sick about you. I didn't know where you were."
"You could have looked for me," Rin suggested, her tone a bit more colder than necessary, "I wasn't even as far as the other side of town."
"I thought that maybe you were on a mission," her mother defended.
"Yeah, right," Rin looked down, trying to concentrate on the floorboards, folding the clothes, anything but the conversation. Just the fact that her mother was trying to justify not looking for her made Rin's blood boil. The irresponsibility and carelessness was the reason she had left in the first place. Scoffing lightly, Rin rolled her eyes and said, "Mom, I haven't gone on a mission since half a year ago. I work at the hospital now; I don't go on missions."
"Oh," her mother said, and then gaining a confused expression on her features, added, "Why didn't I know that?"
Probably because you were too intoxicated to remember, Rin mused bitterly. It wasn't like Rin to act this way, but her mother's treatment and constant defeatist attitude had been a cause of much frustration in her life. "You probably just forgot," Rin offered up as a response.
"Yeah…" Her mother trailed off, biting her lip in nervous uncertainty. It was apparently a hereditary habitual act, for moments later Rin was biting down on hers too.
"So mom, how have you been doing?"
"Good, good," her mother replied off-handedly.
"Been going to your meetings, getting help?" Rin's voice took on a softer tone; this was always a touchy subject, one where if the wrong thing was said in the wrong way, great dissent could result. Thus, the subject needed to be approached with a little more finesse and caution.
"Yeah, every week. I-I've been sober for two months now."
Rin stared back at her mother in awe. Two whole months? That was amazing! Her mother had been so extraordinarily dependant on alcohol for the longest time that even a few weeks would have been taken as a great accomplishment.
The destructive habit had developed in the time where her mother was still a shinobi who went out on missions. At first it had been just to calm her nerves and try to wipe away the images of slain bodies from her mind – and Rin had never considered that one small glass per couple of days was an issue – but then the amount increased and increased until finally she was going to missions hung-over and coming back from them drunk. Her body had steadily built up a strong tolerance, which meant that more alcohol was needed each and every time in order to subdue the violent images that attacked the forefront of her thoughts. By the time Rin had noticed that it was a serious problem that was plaguing her mother, it was almost too late; the older woman had gotten herself in so deep, deeper than she felt she had the willpower to get out.
Soon after Rin had realized the problem, her mother had been suspended from active duty because of a simple mission that she had seriously botched, endangering her comrades and increasing the risk that a scroll with information about Konoha's strategic internal affairs would be captured by the enemy. After being taken off active duty, her mother had little to occupy her time with, and to prevent the gory imagery from reproducing in her mind, she had spent the time she had drinking and going around the village with both civilian and shinobi friends. At first, the woman's friends had thought her new state to be great – the strict mother they were used to seeing was now letting loose and having a little fun. Time passed, and with it, her friends came to realize that her behaviour was unnatural and inappropriate; eventually, the drinking had cost her both her career and her friends.
The loss of both seemed to be another reason to be depressed and drink. Much to both Rin and her mother's relief, the woman had never been a violent drunk, thus she had never taken any frustrations out on Rin when she was in a drunken stupor. The only negative results had been the constant state of unhappiness which Rin's mother was in, the neglect Rin had to endure – as well as the taking care of her impaired mother, and eventually it had caused the dissolution of their family; Rin's father had gotten fed up with the behaviour, and seeing that this was much too large of a problem to tackle – and quite frankly, a problem he did not wish to tackle – he divorced the Rin's mother and moved off to Tea Country, where he found a girlfriend.
Now Rin, who had only been about nine or ten when the alcoholism had started, did not feel any resent towards either parent at first. Sure there was the occasional time she'd be angry with them both for something, but she still loved them unconditionally. And even now, she still loved them unconditionally. But now she was mature, and understood the situation better; it had caused her to feel a bit more than a little resent towards both of her parents. The neglect and constant lack of adoration from her mother had made Rin branch out and try to find attention from other adults – she would often pour her heart and soul into studying medical jutsu so that she could receive some praise and attention from either her peers or her senseis.
The attitude her father had taken on with regards to the situation – namely the 'I don't want to help and I don't want any part of this' attitude – had made her reconsider some of the admiration she felt for him. Whenever her mother was neglecting her, Rin revelled in the knowledge that she could go to her father and he would provide her with all the love and attention she wasn't getting. After he decided to up and leave the both of them, Rin took this as a sign of abandonment and repressed some of the love she felt for him in order to make way for some anger fuelled by he betrayal she felt.
The only thing that she could really thank both her parents for was the ability to act as if everything was perfect. Her family had always acted effortlessly, and while she easily grew tired of it, Rin had to admit that it was a very useful method to stop others from prying into your personal affairs. She had used this talent to plaster on a smile and fool all those at school into thinking that she was the perfectly happy little girl everyone saw her to be. She still used it to conceal her true thoughts on certain situations, and to keep everyone around her at least complacent.
One other positive had resulted from her family life. The loneliness she experienced caused her to socialize more with her peers and display more compassion towards them. With Obito and Kakashi she had been particularly sympathetic. Obito was considered the lowest of the Uchiha Clan and some clan members swore to not even consider him part of their clan. Conscious of all the social pressures he was experiencing, Rin set aside time to be with him and always made sure to give him the praise and attention he so desperately needed, so desperately craved.
With Kakashi it had been a little different; he did not make his situation known to anyone, but Rin, being an expert in facades and defence mechanisms – having used them herself – was able to determine that something was wrong with him, and that he was suffering from some unknown trauma. Thus, she had made it a point to give him as much attention as she gave Obito and in the process, she had started to take a specific liking to him. He was quiet, and unlike others, he did not try to hide his anger from anyone. It was on display for all to marvel at. She supposed that was what made her like him so much. He was real, and real was refreshing.
The final positive of her situation was that it was what had originally driven her towards being a medic-nin. She had hoped with all her young naïve heart that there was a cure for what her mother was experiencing and hoped that maybe, if she could become a medic, she would be able to rid her mother of her ailment and bring their family back together. If that was not possible, Rin had wanted to at least be able to help others out and cure them of their sufferings. Since learning that there was nothing she could do except provide support and positive reinforcement for her mother, Rin had taken to studying both the physiological and psychological aspects of medicine, and the effect that any sickness would have on both states. Books had provided her with viable information, but none had been able to produce the answer to her family's problems.
Snapping out of her thoughts, Rin turned her attention back to the situation at hand. "Two whole months and no drinking?"
Her mother smiled up at her. "Not one single drop."
Rin smiled back and felt the familiar stinging of tears in her eyes. "I-I don't know what to say. I'm so proud of you mom!"
"Thank you Rinnie," her mother said, using the nickname she had for Rin when she was younger. "It means so much to me to hear you say that." She paused for a moment and then looked down, suddenly filled with shame. "I-I'm so sorry that I put you through all this chaos Rin. I didn't mean for it to go this far, for me to cause the whole family to split apart. I know that we're not really close anymore, and maybe you'd prefer to stay with your friend rather than with me, but I was wondering if you wanted to, you know, just spend some time together. As mother and daughter. We haven't really gotten to do that in a long time and I've missed it."
With the apology and the way her mother seemed to be genuinely apologetic and ashamed of her own behaviour, the floodgates in Rin's eyes shattered and the resent in her heart started to dissipate. She dropped the articles of clothing that she had been folding to the ground and caught her mother in a strong hug.
Both females were pretty emotional characters to begin with, and the intensity of the situation they were in seemed to get to both of them; they had tears pouring down their faces rapidly, and their hands shook. "I'm so sorry Rin for putting you through all this," her mother repeated the apology.
"It's ok mom; what's important is that you're fighting this, and you're going to beat this, I know it."
"The meetings have really been helping, you were right."
"I know I was," Rin laughed shakily, "And I know that this is hard for you! I also know you're strong, and you can beat this, I swear you can! I want you to know that I'm here for you, ok? You're not alone. I'm here and I'll support you through anything and everything. I-I just want you to know that."
"I really don't deserve such a wonderful daughter," her mother laughed shakily as well, clutching tighter at the fabric of Rin's dress.
"I love you mom, and I'm so proud to have you as a mother."
Oh Rinnie, I really don't deserve a daughter like you. I've been a terrible mother."
Rin shook her head, mumbling, "No mom, you haven't."
"Yes, I have!"
Rin pulled away slightly and beamed up at her mom. "But you're going to be better, right? You're going to be a great mom!"
Her mother responded by nodding her head vigorously and promising, "I promise that I will do everything to become a better mother. I just wish I could have been that mother when you needed me to be."
"I still need you to be that mother," Rin admitted quietly.
"I love you Rinnie."
"I love you too mom."
By this time, all that was needed to be said in the moment had been said, and both Rin and her mother were satisfied. Both now believed in a better tomorrow, and had higher hopes for recovery; both the recovery of their family and the recovery from alcoholism. They stayed wrapped in the hug for a good portion of time, before they broke apart and wiped away their tears, sniffling. Turning to look up at each other, both beamed widely and could feel within their hearts that everything was going to be ok for both of them.
Author's Note: Well, there it was! The chapter inspired by a play! I am happy to note that chapter 16 received more reviews than the previous one. Thank you to all of its reviewers: chibirain94, Sakra-chan, rileyonline, ninbunny alchemist, EndDragon, Hikari Minamoto, catgirl9696, Konoha's White Fang, and Piccylo. I sincerely hope that you have all enjoyed this chapter. This is the Rin-centric one, but I assure you that we will be getting back to KakaRin very soon! As always, I encourage you all to read and review; reviews filled with concrit are especially appreciated! :)
Chapterly Challenge: Last chapter's challenges were very successfully completed, and there are a lot of points to be handed out! The answers to the English challenge was, "Twinkle, twinkle, little star," and the answe to the Latin challenge was, "Prepared in mind and resources".
Now, let us take a look at our standings, shall we?
Chibirain94 - 10
Catgirl9696 - 15
Sakra-chan - 14
Snappa - 24
Hikari Minamoto - 20
EndDragon - 15
Piccylo - 20
JoiZ. D - 10
Rileyonline - 20
Konoha's White Fang - 5
As for this chapter, here are both your Latin and English challenges. Remember that you only need to give the correct answer to one in order to receive five points. Well, here they are:
1) Freedom from incrustations of grime is contiguous to rectitude.
2) Amare et sapere vix deo conceditur.
