Renesmee: Contradiction
She's the accidental daughter, the impossible child, the mistake. She shouldn't exist, and she knows it. They all love her dearly, but she's an abomination, a paradox. He loves her, but only because he's forced to. It's nothing he can help. In fact, he would probably hate her otherwise. She wishes he did. Her mother seems to get all the love, and she's ashamed of her envy. It's wrong, she knows, and misguided, but she's jealous. Her mother has the tragic story, the forbidden romance, the warring lovers-- And a daughter whose very existence goes against nature. She hates it.
Jacob: Obligation
It would all be happy endings and butterflies from here on out, but he wasn't so sure he wanted to let go of the past. She had been his world, had been his moon and his sun and everything in between. The idea that there was something else, another, greater, force, that tethered him to this Earth that he now knew was not her, but merely a sphere of dirt and grass beneath his feet, disturbed him greatly. It hurt his heart, too. Suddenly, the very air he breathed tasted of his obligation. But all he wanted was his love.
Alice: Facade
It was all an act, of course. As soon as the others were out of sight (or mind-hearing range, sometimes), the tiny shoulders slumped dejectedly, delicate smile sliding off her elfin features. She would sit for hours on end, brooding. She'd stare; she'd weep. Always tearlessly. Always silent, always unmoving. Playing the happy little pixie was strenuous, and it got to her sometimes. She longed to peel the mask away, to let them see her for who she was, but of course they would not accept her. They loved Alice Cullen. None of them had ever met Mary Alice Brandon.
Esme: Regret
Sometimes, she finds herself longing for a normal life. For a few healthy human babies, for a peaceful existence in the right time period. Occasionally, she even finds herself wishing that she had never thrown herself off that cliff. She wishes her old life back sometimes, stillborn child and all. She would have dealt with the hardships and the heartache, if only to remain blissfully ignorant. To stay human, and relatively happy, is a convenience she once took for granted and now will never know. But then she looks at him, and knows she wouldn't have it any other way.
Carlisle: Light
Beneath the acceptance and the careful control, he still hates himself. He despises what he is, not what he's become. He can't see himself as civilized, as a person. He looks at the monsters he's created, at the ignorant nightmares laughing around him. He sees only the horror, only the darkness. He sees the deaths he's caused, the lives he's ruined. He sees himself as he was, and longs for it with all his still heart. He sees what he is now, and thinks he should have killed himself then. He sees himself, but he fails to see the light.
So, I've had these first two chapters typed up for a while, and figured I might as well post them while I'm home and have the time. Expect the next few to be up soon, given that I'm really sick right now and will probably be home for a little. Dx
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STILL don't own anything.