Chapter 3
The Arbiter was fortunate to find Mewtwo and Lucario together, practicing some sort of martial art, something more spiritual and graceful than what he had seen the humans perform. More like a dance, the way the arms swung, the feet moved in graceful rhythme. Fortunate because it meant one less interview. Mewtwo was tall, but not as tall as him. A little less than seven feet tall, with a muscular bulk and sharp senses. Lucario was tiny, not even breaking the five foot mark. His build could best be described as scrawny, little tiny matchstick arms and a narrow, almost feminine chest. Both had the assets to hold their own against the alien, possibly best him even. But he wasn't here to fight, and had no real desire to. He was respectful, placing an fist over his chest in a gesture of respect for his people. The two pokemon seemed to understand the alien act, or at least didn't decide to attack.
"I don't know who it could be," Mewtwo said in his usual voiceless way. Sort of like having a radio sound off in your skull. The Arbiter got used to it. "I am not even sure that it is someone. I love Wolf like a brother, but he tends to be overly suspicious at times."
"And yet from what I understand, he was the only one to realize Link's suspicions of your involvement with the princess?"
"He also believed that it was Link that rigged the simulator, but I scanned every inch of the youth's mind and found not a trace of guilt."
"Have you read everyone's mind to relieve them of suspicion?"
"I have, with a few. Unfortunately, some of them have very strong mental barriers, and some of them have politely requested that I not invade their personal space in such a manner. No lasting harm was done to me. It is no real problem."
"If you had to suspect someone." The Arbiter shifted uneasily from hoof to hoof. There was something he didn't like about these pokemon. Something that told him to be wary. "Who would it be?"
"I would suspect Wolf," Mewtwo said. "A mind like Wolf's I have never encountered. One could easily excuse him as a brute, he has a very direct way of thinking and relies a great deal on force, but there is something deeper to him. He's able to see complexities that others would pass over. He has a certain cunning to him, an intelligence, a viciousness that is not easily defined or countered."
"If only he would use his powers for good instead of evil," Lucario said, speaking for the first time.
"Thank you for your time," the Arbiter said with a low bow. "And I am pleased to know that you have both recovered nicely."
Next the Arbiter found Wolf and someone who looked a great deal like Wolf, only with orange as the dominate fur pattern and both eyes, green instead of purple, in the kitchen. They had placed a table in the center, two seats at either side, and apparently pushed a duo of stoves so they rested close. Said stoves must have been on, because the burners glowed a bright orange. Their right hands were clasped together, and their elbows were bent and touching the table. Their left forearms where over the smoking, shimmering heat of the stove, tied with handkerchief to keep them from pulling away. The smell of burnt fur overwhelmed the Arbiter, even as he approached from down the hallway. Both Wolf and the orange Wolf were gritting their teeth, growling, huffing, sobbing.
"Do I even want to know?" the Arbiter asked.
"What do you want," Wolf asked, cringing, swallowing sob after sob as he struggled to pin the vulpine's arm. The vulpine struggled just as intently, sobbed just as much. The Arbiter watched as the layer of fur on each's forearm began to singe away, exposing the pale skin underneath, quickly charring black.
"I know about burns. You really will want to move your arms."
"What do you want?" Wolf demanded. Losing his concentration allowed the vulpine to nearly pin him, knuckles hovered less than an inch from defeat. Gritting his teeth and straining his muscles he returned to the stalemate.
"I am not sure we should discuss the matter. Can the vulpine be trusted?"
"You tell me?"
The Arbiter looked to the fox. "It seems doubtful. If the vulpine were to rewire the simulator, he would have had to work rather extensively, crossing wires and such. If a stray strand of your fur was caught in the wires simply by opening the door, I would doubt that the vulpine would manage to keep not a trace free, even if he took certain precautions. His arms weren't shaved the following weeks, correct?"
"That is correct." Wolf strained, clamped his jaw so tight his teeth nearly shattered, and pinned the vulpine's hand down for a full three seconds. With a howl of victory, he cut his arm free, screamed in agony as he looked at the melted skin, and ran to the freezer to bury the burn in ice. The vulpine's eyes rolled back into his head and he passed out. The Arbiter squatted to his haunches and touched a finger to the vulpine's throat. Sensing a heartbeat, he ran a towel under cold water, then wrapped the burn gently.
"What was the point of that?" the Arbiter had to ask.
Wolf took a dozen deep breaths. "Little pussy Fox has to be putzing around, bragging about his victory. I needed to remind him who is the alpha."
"So you give yourself a third degree burn while beating him at arm wrestling?"
"You're right, because that's completely different than what you did." A claw tapped the Arbiter's well armored chest. "So you've ruled out Fox?"
"More or less. The lack of physical evidence at the scenes would seem to remove several of you more…furry specimens. Further, there is the nature of the crimes, attacking indirectly. It lacks intimacy. Not a thrill kill, the assailant didn't want to feel it, which would take out some of your more sinister comrades. I would say who ever did it was angry with Mewtwo and Lucario, but lacked confidence in their own abilities enough to attack them directly."
"Fuck," Wolf muttered. "It was Link."
"Or, to them, it was simply about business, nothing personal. These crimes could be passed over as accidents and mishaps. If not for your extremely paranoid state of mind, they probably would have been. I would like to ask you about the one called Nana. I was reading her history. Her parents were killed under mysterious circumstances when she was at…'camp'?"
"Most of us lost someone. Except for me, I killed my parents. But you already knew that."
"And you are positive that you had nothing to do with it?"
"Arbiter, I am not a subtle person. If I wanted to kill Mewtwo, I would have walked over and cut his necks."
"Nana seems to have an intimate knowledge of several of your compatriots, and had several theories. She suggested Jigglypuff as the culprit."
"Jigglypuff is a pokemon, why would she want to kill her two Ubermensche's?"
"Why do you constantly chase after Samus as if you are a broken puppy? Its undignified."
In bizarre timing, Samus entered the room, a moment before the lights flickered out and the entire mansion went black. Wolf was first to react to the darkness, with a monotone "What the fuck?" He sparked his lighter, offering the slightest illumination in the vast sea of ink. It was only when the Arbiter ignited his energy blade that they were offered enough glow to see each other.
"Samus, where did you get that knife?" Wolf asked.
Samus looked down at the blade, the shine catching the reflective glow of the energy blade. "We're in a kitchen. Why are you acting so jumpy."
"I don't know, it feels like we're in a horror movie sometimes. I was expecting the lights to come back on and one of us to have been killed in a way that is ironic to our character."
"You watch too much television, brother."
"Can we please find out whats wrong with the lights?" Samus shouted.
"Why do you care? You're immune to the killer's wrath. You're still a virgin. Arbiter and I are the only one in danger."
The glow of the Arbiter's sword didn't stretch far enough in the dark that he could make out what happened, but he heard knuckles muffled on fur and a rather pained yelp, and a moment later when the lights came back on, Wolf was on the ground, rubbing his cheek.
"Have you done any investigation to the end that Ms. Aran is the assailant?"
"Samus was in the shower during the Lucario incident."
"How do you know that brother?"
"That's not important."
Samus cuffed him over the ear like a master would a dog.
"If you will excuse me brother," the Arbiter said, bowing, sheathing his sword and stalking off.
Wolf's arm returned to the cool embrace of the ice box. "Something I've been meaning to ask you, how do you know the alien? You seem to know a lot of people without any prior reference."
"What do you mean. I'm a space faring wolf. It's perfectly logical that I should have some encounters with a variety of fellow spacemen. A better question is, when in any of our dialogues would I have brought up my relationship with the Arbiter?"
---
Jigglypuff's usual meal consisted of lollipops, ice cream, Twinkies, three cinnamon buns, and a Black Forest cake. Every lunch she was watched with a disturbing degree of dedication, Pichu and Popo drooling over the assortment of sweets that adorned her table. She gobbled them down with enthusiasm that rivaled Kirby.
"I still say it was Red," she said through massive bites. Mewtwo had long granted the pokemon fluency in languages, but only Jigglypuff regularly used the gift. She was more human than the others, he guessed that had something to do with it. "You sure you don't want any of this?"
Beside her, Mewtwo sat, holding a cup of steaming green tea to his lips and sipping without a sound. "No, junk food goes straight to my thighs."
"Pi!" Pichu shouted.
Jigglypuff cut into the Black Forest cake, putting a piece the size of the rodent's whole body in front of him. Not on a plate, simply on the table, chocolate smearing on wood. R.O.B. would be furious as he used his vast array of cleaning supplies to get the brown stain out.
"I mean, Red is a pokemon trainer. We're pokemon. Do you see the connection?"
"We are only worth catching if we are alive. Besides, wouldn't it seem rather suspicious if Red caught a Lucario following Lucario disappearance? And I'm a collector's item. It is not as if he could get away with it."
"Then maybe it's Link. We know why he went after you. He went after Lucario to throw us off the trail. It's the perfect crime."
Pichu nibbled happily on the chocolate cake. Eyes rolled into the back of his head as he entered certain sweet ecstasy that Mewtwo paid no mind to.
"What is your interest in this? You are beginning to sound like Wolf. Perhaps they were simply accidents."
"Perhaps they were not. Why are you so laid back about this? You should be furious. Are you sure that you're the man in your relationship?"
"Actually, I, nor Mew, has a gender."
Jigglypuff inflated in a gesture that he was aware meant frustration. "I'm scared I might be next."
Neither noticed as Pichu's spasms of sugary bliss became more violent, his eyes turned completely white, flecks of drool lined his lips and his tongue popped out of his mouth. He leaned a little heavier on his rump, then feel back.
"I've been in hiding the past few months. I only leave my room when I have a match."
"Or to eat."
"I don't want to die on an empty stomach." She reached for the knife to cut her own slab of cake, briefly looking to Pichu, and the furious tremor he was in. "Pichu?"