A/N: Hey kiddies =D sorry for the delay, college is crazy at the moment. Life always gets in the way, dammit! Anyways, I hope you love me long time, this is quite a long update, and it was quite difficult to write, for some reason 0_o Right, just wanna clear something up, quite a few people have been saying they're really looking forward to what's going to happen. The story is pretty much canon in almost every way, i'm sticking to what SM told us, though it's very little so I have quite a lot to play with :D Just making sure you all know that nothing drastic is going to happen that would seriously affect the real "Twilight" saga. So nothing crazy like Edward murders Carlisle, or anything sickening like Edward and Esme get it on. Nothing crazy...though I am going to push the boundaries just a little tiny bit :P Ok, I've blabbed enough:

Enjoy!

Chapter five.

"I'll kill him. I'll kill that son of a-" Edward roared from downstairs.

I had moved from my office on the third floor of our new country house to stand in front of Edward, but he was gone by the time I reached the spot he should have been standing in. A flash of air, moving so quickly even my eyes didn't register in time, darted silently out the open patio doors. He was heading towards the forest just behind our house, to run I supposed, that's what usually made him feel better if he was in a crabby mood. Then I heard Edward uproot a tree, or at least a large part of one, and hurl it through the forest. It either collided with the earth or another cluster of trees a few moments later because the sound it emitted was outrageous. He then snarled viciously and did the same again.

It was a good job we always tried to acquire a house as far away as possible from the rest of the population of the town, this time being no different. Hopefully Edward's tantrum wouldn't have alarmed too many locals.

I sighed and allowed my eyes to wander lazily outside while I tried to get a reign over my sudden pensive mood. He'd calm down, but I needed to know why he was so angry. Was it me? What caught my attention after the initial reaction to the outburst, however, was the sound of Esme's choked, tearless sobs from behind me.

My heart had been about to break almost every single day since I turned Esme. She was quiet, reserved, extremely apologetic and obviously unhappy. I hated myself, truly despised every cell in my being; but never as much as in that very moment. I knew if she could, she would be crying hysterically.

I dashed over to her, wrapped my arm around her shoulders and coaxed her to sit down on the couch in the middle of our living area.

"Car…Carlisle- I……I'm sorry. I- didn't" She managed to stumble out before she let her head fall into her open hands to cover her face. I watched anxiously, my heart threatening to burst from my chest at any second for not consoling her, but also for not following my son to find out what had happened. I was torn, again.

"It's ok Esme, come here sweetheart" I wrapped my hand around hers, letting my fingers gently stroke her soft skin. I didn't care if it was too forward, I didn't know what else to do. "Just calm down and tell me what happened, when you're alright to do so." I desperately tried to keep my worry, confusion and anxiety over the whole situation out of my voice and away from my expressions. Turning into a wreck was not going to help right now.

Esme sighed, and then blessed me with her gaze. Her eyes met mine, and though they were still a frightening dark shade of red and wracked with pain, every time she offered me such intimacy, I went crazy. The hazy, dream-like fog clouded over my mind and I was rendered speechless. Anyone would have thought I was actually 23, not over two hundred years old.

Unable to speak without sounding like a fool, I simply squeezed her hand re-assuringly and tried to give what I thought would probably look like a kind smile, not one that had "I'm infatuated with you" written all over it.

She exhaled sharply and began to speak. "I'd been trying to not think about it for so long, ever since you changed me. I wanted so desperately to be able to think about what I wanted, so that I could deal with it, get over it and move on. And I know it's not Edward's fault, but I pushed it to the back of my brain and blocked it out, well, I didn't want to upset either of you." She trailed off, waiting for my reaction I suppose, though I was still just as confused as beforehand.

"It's ok Esme, please continue" I added.

"I'm married." She shot her gaze to the floor, if it were possible for her to blush she would have been a beetroot. I chuckled inwardly at the image.

"I know." I stated matter-of-factly. Her face met mine once again and I was fronted with a look of complete be-dazzlement, this was, I presumed, what I looked like all the time these days. "I remembered you having a different name when I saw you the first time, when you were a teenager, to now. It said you were Mrs. Esme Anne Evenson. I don't want you to think I was stalking you, but I just checked your files when I –" She cut me off.

"Don't worry about it Carlisle, it's fine. I understand. I best get to the point then, hadn't I?" Esme exhaled again and slightly tightened her grip on my hand. I knew this was difficult for her, since I changed her two months previously, we had never spoke about her past or her attempted suicide. I assumed if she wanted to confide in me, then she would do so in her own time. I didn't want to push her trust and make her even more nervous around me.

"I wish I had never met him" she sneered the words in a menacing tone that shocked me. "I wish I had never given him the time of day, but like the idiot I am, of course I did. He was a charmer, he told me he'd treat me right, that he'd always love me. How wrong I was to believe him for one second. If he did love me, then he sure had a funny way of showing me. I was swept away with the attention and we were married a few months afterwards. It was the most stupid mistake I'd ever made." Her torrent of emotion slowed towards the end.

She shot me a glance to see my reaction; I simply nodded for her to continue. But inside I was screaming. He hurt her? How could anyone even contemplate harming my Esme?

I had to stop calling her mine. She was not mine.

Her delicate voice interrupted my stream of silent consciousness once again and I forced myself to listen more carefully now.

"I'll spare you the details. Basically, he showed his true colours once we were married. Once I belonged to him. He had me trapped and I didn't know what to do. He didn't allow me to see anyone except for my mother and my aunt; I couldn't tell them, they wouldn't have understood. I was too afraid of him anyway. It went on for about a year. Then I ran away when I found out I was pregnant with our first child." She abruptly stopped here. Her face became covered in a new layer of anguish, pain and sadness.

My mind was running laps on itself; I couldn't keep up, even with all this extra storage space. I knew the second part of this story was the worst for her. Either she lost the child, or he made her give it up. I gulped un-necessarily in anticipation, yet horror, of the answer to my secret questions that was about to be revealed.

"I knew I couldn't stay when I was pregnant, I couldn't let him hurt my baby aswel. I sneaked out one day when he was at work. I'd managed to save some money up from the tiny bit he gave me every week to buy groceries with. The first few weeks were terrifying, I thought he was going to track me down and I was too scared to go outside. But I began to realise he wouldn't find me, he wouldn't hurt me again. I got a job in a library and began to make friends again. I was so excited for the arrival of my baby, I knew he was going to be a boy the moment I found out I was expecting. Joseph." She smiled weakly and clutched my hand tightly.

"I was the happiest I had ever been in my entire existence" she added. "He was beautiful, the most perfect thing I had ever seen!" Esme exclaimed.

I could picture that. If he had a fraction of Esme's beauty then he would be the most handsome boy in the world.

"But they crushed my dreams a few hours later. He was very sick. I held him in my arms three days later as he passed away, they had to force me hand him back hours later because I refused to let go when they asked. I didn't understand how something so innocent, so beautiful, could be snatched away from me, away from the world and his future. My life, the one thing I felt worth living for hand just been taken away and there was nothing I could do about it. That's why I, erm…jumped off the-" she stuttered at the end, I interrupted to save her more misery.

"Oh Esme. I am so almightily sorry, I cannot even begin to imagine how difficult that must have been, and still must be, for you. Why didn't you tell me? I would have tried to help you, no-one would be angry with you" I almost pleaded.

"Edward?" her eyes interrogated me and a fresh wave of panic coursed through my veins. I could tell she was equally concerned from the way she asked me. She had been with us for such a short period of time, yet she and Edward had become very close.

I told her this and explained about his current temperament.

"Edward has been…struggling recently. He is very attached to you and was obviously overcome by his emotions when he heard your thoughts. He thinks of you as a mother, Esme. I think we should give him a few hours then maybe try looking for him." She nodded and we both rose to stand.

Before I knew what was happening, Esme flung her arms around my neck and pulled me towards her at such a fast pace a human would have been seriously winded. I hesitated then folded my arms around her waist as she chuckled into my neck at my embarrassment and shock.

"Thank you for being here for me Carlisle. I truly appreciate all you do for us." She whispered into my hair.

My brain was still twirling, exploding and doing cart-wheels so I was unable to fully grasp what she was saying. All I could think about was her silk skin underneath my hands, pressed against my face. Her fingers and hands touching the back of my neck, sending shockwaves down my spine. I had never been hugged by a woman other than my mother before, let alone one as radiant as Esme…let alone one I was in love with. I desperately wanted to feel her lips against mine, but the thought was dragged away from me as she stiffened in my arms.

"What if Edward does go to find Charles?" Esme spoke so quietly my ears strained to hear her tender voice.

My heart dropped to my stomach. The panic buzzed in my ears.

We ran.

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