Third chapter! ^_^ Tis a short one though. Ah well. The next one will be longer. Enjoy!
Ch. 3
In a hostel room in the land of wind, far away from Orochimaru's underground quarters, Hidan sneezed loudly. Apart from waking himself up from a much-needed sleep, he also woke Kakuzu, and was rewarded by having the spare futon thrown on top of him.
When his complaints were successfully muffled, Kakuzu returned to his bed, but not for long. Only ten minutes had passed when the sun came through the crack in the curtains and onto his face. Squinting, he groaned and got up.
Only after he had thrown his Akatsuki cloak on over his ninja gear did he lift the futon off his partner. A torrent of abuse greeted him, and he paid it no heed.
"You should have held it in then."
More curse were aimed in his direction, accompanied by, "I'm fucking starving!"
"Hurry the hell up then an get dressed."
"That's gonna be fucking hard after someone tried to fucking suffocate me with a fucking mattress! Seriously, why?"
Kakuzu dropped the futon and started walking to the door.
"You woke me up."
Hidan sat up and ran a hand through his silver hair.
"Oh boo-hoo. It was a sneeze, Kakuzu, shit. Someone's probably talking about me."
Kakuzu snorted and opened the door. He knew Hidan was religious, annoying so, but superstitious? That was new.
"Now you're being paranoid. Get up, we leave in five minutes."
He closed the door, cutting short Hidan's indignant reply.
Hidan knew Kakuzu well enough to know that five minutes was all he was going to get, and that included time for food. He scrambled out of bed, calling Kakuzu every name under the sun, and pulled on his gear. He slowed down briefly to check the state of his injuries. They hadn't healed yet, but they gave him no trouble as he dressed. It would have to do. They had at least two days' travel ahead…whoop di fuckin' doo.
He grabbed his scythe, flung the door open and dashed downstairs. There was no way he was missing his only decent meal in three days. He'd order the most expensive thing there too, just to piss Kakuzu off.
As Kakuzu predicted, they donned their hats and left the hostel barely five minutes later. They slipped, unnoticed by the unsuspecting inhabitants, from the village.
As soon as they were out of sight, they changed direction and flew off around the desert, heading northwest.
Hidan could understand why they were going at twice the normal pace; Kakuzu's 'side-trip' had delayed them two days, not to mention the encounter with the Sound Ninja. What Hidan didn't understand, however, was why they kept going back on their tracks and changing direction periodically. Naturally, he voiced his confusion after these tactics had gone on for a while.
"You lost or something? We better not be going on another fuckin' side-trip."
Kakuzu didn't look at him.
"You're an idiot."
"That's not answering my question, asshole!"
"You really think the Sound would just let us go, and not wonder what happened to that team they sent out?"
"So?"
A vein pulsed in Kakuzu's temple.
"'So', we have to shake off the pursuit. God, how did you manage to avoid hunter nins after you left your village?"
Hidan scoffed.
"I didn't avoid them, I just killed 'em all. I didn't waste my time trying to avoid them."
"Hopeless."
"What the fuck's that supposed to mean?"
"I don't feel like explaining it in small words."
Kakuzu increased his pace and launched himself ahead of his aggravating partner, while Hidan stayed behind, scowling.
"We don't have time to fight more shinobi, so take that retarded look off your face before I kill you."
"Fuck you in your stitched up ass, seriously. This sucks."
…
Kakuzu needn't have worried; they encountered no one and covered quite a lot of ground on the first day. The village where the Gobi Jinchuuriki lived was still two days away, maybe more if they did not keep up the pace. Like many times before, they decided to resign themselves to being late. Getting the Five-Tales wasn't the most important thing on Akatsuki's list anyway.
They cleared the desert and decided to stop for the night. Kakuzu had finally given in to Hidan's whining. They set up camp in a small patch of forest, where the trees would give them cover from the road and the land of wind's seasonal gales. After they had eaten, Hidan threw himself on the ground, closed his eyes and sighed heavily. Kakuzu looked up from his map of the continent.
"What's wrong with you now? You can't still be tired from that fight."
Kakuzu's tone was gruff, but Hidan didn't stir,
"Well I am, deal with it, seriously. That Sound fucker – you know, the one in the village – it must have been his jutsu or something.
Kakuzu returned to his map.
"His bingo book record said he used poisoned weapons."
Hidan sat up.
"Aw, shit."
Kakuzu was unconcerned.
"You stabbed yourself with his katana, didn't you? Idiot."
"I didn't know the shithead poisoned the fucking thing!"
He fell back down again.
"Shit, man. I fucking hate getting poisoned. Takes forever to get the shit out of your system."
"Don't use the enemy's weapons in your stupid rituals then."
Kakuzu sounded bored.
"Think before you stab next time."
"Would you quit the lecture and tell me what type of poison that guy used? You've done missions with Puppet boy, what'd he tell you about poisons?"
Kakuzu didn't answer for a few minutes. Eventually, he folded and put away the map. He stared at Hidan for a few seconds before answering.
"It's hard to tell, you being immortal and all. Most likely it's a strong sedative. One hit and the victim collapses and falls into a coma, dies within the day. Sooner, depending on the dose."
"That's fuckin great. It is gonna takes forever to go."
"Put up with it."
There was no retort; Hidan was already asleep.
…
Orochimaru was planning his next move. Kabuto had told him all of what he had heard the two Akatsuki discuss outside the bounty station. He knew where they were going, and if they were to be taken as an example, what the rest of Akatsuki were after. He knew that he himself must confront Hidan, there was no one else in Otogakure strong enough to bring him in. He would have to bring others, of course, the Akatsuki would have to be separated, i.e., Kakuzu must be kept busy while Orochimaru dealt with Hidan.
His current body would last him another few months, he had plenty of time to snare his new prey, but Orochimaru was not the most patient of the three Sannin. He knew he wouldn't have to wait quite the full three years before changing bodies, and he wanted this one now.
Down in his underground lair, he took up a map of the continent (almost identical to Kakuzu's) and followed Akatsuki's journey with a long white finger.
It would have to be an ambush. Kakuzu would be expecting pursuit
Orochimaru smiled, showing all of his teeth.
He had decided on his plan of action. If the Kusagakure was where they were headed, he and his followers would be there to greet them.
.. .. ..
The next chapter will be more exciting… :D Please review! TT-TT and thank you to those of you who have, I loves ya like a Mr Turtle loves not being taken out of his tank. XD