A/N: So I've made sure to post the right chap this time (sorry bout the last one). It's not 3am this time. Lesson learnt. Oh, I'm pimping some stories in my profile. Not just because they're my girls but because they're genuinely amazing stories. Bec, Sally and Gabi [love4] u guys!

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LPOV

Killing was never the hard part for me. A twist. A snap. Faded energy. An empty vessel. Killing was easy. Knowing that this wasn't normal, to have such a nonchalant attitude towards taking a life, that was the hard part.

We stood before the burning fire as our claws sliced through the flesh with ease. The faint sparkle on their pale grey skin was the only sign of an impending transformation. Everything else was still very much human. Blood and plenty of it. Limbs were severed and thrown into the flames before us. They spat back with a crackling sound, devouring the offering we supplied. Hair, skin, fat, organs, bone. All taken greedily by the growing flames.

The temperature it took to completely break down a human body was higher then we could replicate requiring the charred skeletal remains to be buried. We dug together, not needing to communicate. Both knowing that this was our life now. Death, destruction, it was all part of the territory.

And I'd have it no other way.

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With my accumulated sleep debt I'd managed a straight twelve hours from the minute my head hit the pillow to when I woke up. The threat of the red haired vamp had us on a time limit but I needed a good rest. The events of the last week had me worn out and this was as close to recovery time as I was going to get. Jacob was running patrol claiming to have slept enough while in the hospital. He was just as tired as me and he did a poor job of hiding it.

I groaned loudly at prospect of getting out of a warm and inviting bed. Forcing my feet to touch the floor I half stumbled out of my room to the smell of bacon and eggs. Seth was running patrol with Jacob and mom was keeping Charlie occupied in Forks so my kitchen chef was a mystery. As I turned the corner I was greeted by an overly chirpy Emily. She ran over to me and embraced my stiffened body, again pressing her small baby bump into my own stomach. It was too early for this shit.

"Emily...what...you're....why?" was about all I could get out, moving my hand through my bed hair in confusion. I almost panicked for a brief second before remembering that I had chopped it off in moment of impromptu insanity yesterday.

"I wanted to see you Lee, catch up on how things went with you and Jake" as if killing two people had been a date. The girlish sound in her voice was highly irritating at this hour. "You were asleep when I got here so I waited, watched some TV, cleaned up then finally started making breakfast. It's the sure fire way to get Sam out of bed and what do you know? It works on you too." She smiled that perky half smile at me and I couldn't get out the bitchy reply that was in my head. I wanted to. I loved her almost as much as I hated her. Of all the people in my life Emily was the one I bit my tongue for the most. As hard as it was, one look at her scars and I suddenly found the strength to do it.

"Ok, ahh, thanks for breakfast and all but I really should be training now anyway...."

"Jacobs orders Lee. He told me to make sure you didn't leave until you were well rested and had a full stomach."

So it wasn't her idea. She was a spy. Damn Jacob Black coddling me as if I was a child. Damn him and his looking out for me. Damn him for being so damn sexy.... My mind drifted to thoughts too early for the morning. It returned as I registered Emily's puzzled expression, standing before me, plate in hand. I grabbed it with a quick "Thanks" while sitting down to eat. She sat beside me with that same annoying look on her face. I could see she was about to say something. I stuffed my mouth as an excuse to not talk.

"You know I haven't seen this Leah in a few years. The glow in your face, the spark in your eye. I've really missed her." She rubbed the hand I wasn't using to shovel food into my mouth and I choked a little. That wasn't what I was expecting. It was way too early for this happy sentimental stuff. Especially since Emily had spent the last few months hating me after I ruined her wedding photos with my surly facial expressions. I swallowed the giant ball of food in my mouth as I placed my fork on the almost empty in front of me.

"All done!" I exclaimed pushing off on my chair. "That was delicious, thanks cuz" I added, planning my escape route. Before I had it figured out the thunderous sound of four angry legs made their way to my door. It swung open smashing into the wall behind it. Jacob stormed in, eyes ablaze, and headed straight for me. He was completely naked but his face was so intense I almost didn't notice.

"Jake what are you..." I started to whisper.

"Lee if he tries anything, anything that you're not comfortable with you just scream my name out and I'll be in there in a heartbeat. If he touches you, if he looks at you, if he breathes in some way that you find offensive, you let me know and I'll tear his balls off so help me God."

"Jacob what the hell are you talking a...." I was interrupted with another set of paws as Embry burst into the front room. He was also naked and also not caring. I had no idea what they were so angry about but it seemed important if neither of them decided they needed clothing.

"I told you to stay out of my fucking head Jacob, that was part of this arrangement. You get your own pack and you stay out of my thoughts."

"You think I want this? You think I wanted to see that shit? I was making a real effort and I see you trying to..."

"Shut up Jake, let her chose what she wants with no input from you."

I briefly glanced over at Emily who was looking everywhere in the room other then at the two large boys standing in front of me. Her embarrassment was so obvious I could almost feel the heat from where I stood.

"If you guys are done can we take this somewhere else?" I said gesturing to Emily with a nod of my head.

They both glanced at her briefly not even registering her discomfort. Jake walked towards me as he placed his hands on my shoulders.

"Lee, please, once and for all sort him out. Whatever you choose I'm fine with, I just can't deal with this level of blind persistence." With that he kissed me lightly on the cheek and walked back towards the door. He shot a warning glance at Embry who refused to take his eyes off of me. Emily excused herself as she ran after Jacob, happy for an escape from the tension in the room. I wanted to follow her, to follow Jacob. I had hoped I could avoid another run in with Embry pre-battle. Guess not

"So you and Jake can communicate in wolf form huh?"

He nodded his head while rolling his eyes at the obvious observation.

"Then what did you say, or think to get him so worked up? And just know that I'm only standing here because I'm sick of this. You have other things to be focussed on and so do I. I want this sorted out..." He cut me off.

"Marry me."

He walked towards me, holding eye contact as he grabbed my hands in his.

"Embry...come on..." I hoped he was joking but his face had never looked more serious.

"I've thought about it and we can make it work. Marry me Leah. I promise that if Jacob can fight an imprint so can I. We'll leave him in charge of the pack and move away. La Push can do without us for a while. You'll study like you wanted and I'll work to support us. We can try for a family, adopting if it doesn't work out. If not there is travelling, seeing the world. The best part of all of this is that time is on our side. Please Leah." He was almost begging me as he leaned into my body. I felt my head swirl. He just offered me everything I thought I wanted and yet it just didn't feel right.

I wasn't in love with him. I wasn't in love with Jacob. Right now I was just starting to like myself again let alone commit to someone else for all eternity.

"Embry. I can't. I'm not in love with..."

"I knew you'd say that but Lee you will be. If you keep opening yourself up, if you let me in more. Trust me I know that we're meant to be together. I'm not usually this stubborn. I know that after all of this stuff with Jacob we'll still eventually end up with one another. I'm just giving you the option now."

He made me angry how he said it so matter of fact, as if I was wasting my time with Jacob. I almost hit him in the face. He spoke with such passion though, such determination. He'd given this a lot of thought.

"You think you know a lot more then you actually do Embry Call." I spat, venom in my tone. He pressed his body up against me completely as he hovered over my mouth for a kiss. I could've pushed away but I wanted it. I wanted to taste him one last time. To tease him as I always did and leave him wanting more.

"This is the last time..." was all I got out before he once again cut me off with his lips on mine. I opened my mouth in response and he slowed his pace. He was kissing me as he used to, slowly and passionately. Tongues moving together, massaging one another, as usual. Except he refused to let me take over as I always did, in complete control for once. So slowly it hurt. Slowly enough to breath properly and elongate the kiss. Slowly enough to remind myself of what usually followed. Slowly enough to make me feel how much he wanted me. Slowly enough to almost make me want to accept his offer.

I tried to pull away after what seemed like hours. He was supporting my entire body weight with a single hand between my shoulder blades. I moved forward into him as I stood on both of my feet once again, still trying to break out of our lip lock. He gave in and moved down my neck as his other hand worked my left breast, kneading it just the way I liked. I groaned involuntarily.

"Embry stop it" I whispered, eyes closed, barely protesting. A kiss was one thing but it wasn't going any further. Even if I could feel how ready he was pressed into my hip. He moved his lips down my chest, ignoring my protest.

"No seriously Embry, enough." I managed to get out while pulling away. He pushed me backwards towards the dining table, smashing the plate that was on it to the ground. In a single swift movement he lifted me on top of it and continued to silence me with his mouth. I started to panic. I tried to pull away but he pushed my head back in place with his hand. Rough. Too rough. I stopped moving my mouth as he continued to force his tongue around. He ripped my singlet from me completely exposing the top half of my body. His free hand moved quickly over my back and down towards my hips. I couldn't get the words out but he knew. From the way I was resisting. From the way my body was pulling away. From the slight shaking that his touch caused. He knew. He finally pulled back for a breath allowing me enough time for me to get out a "stop".

I tasted salt on my tongue as I watched him move towards the door frame in less then a second. His back was to me but I saw his head tilt my way as he said something I couldn't hear. Then he turned into a wolf and was gone. I checked my eyes to see if the salty taste was my own tears but I knew my ducts were empty. They were his.

I sat in shock for the next twenty minutes. I blamed myself. Then I blamed him. Then I blamed myself again.

Had I encouraged it?

Did anything happen? He did mange to stop after all.

No, something did happen. Something almost happened.

But again, was it my doing?

If there was ever a moment to cry this would be it but my body refused to let me. My tear ducts stopped functioning after I wasted them on Sam. So I sat, for another half hour, in the same position. Still trying to make sense of what happened. At some point I had covered my exposed chest with the table cloth below me. I stared at the open door hoping someone would come along and tell me the last hour had a been a nightmare.

Instead I heard the pained sound of a wolf howling in the distance. Then another. Three in total. I had no time to breakdown now. It was an unmistakable battle cry. The vampires were here early. I ran to the door, phasing in a heartbeat on my way to meet the other guys.

Killing a few vampires would help me move through the pain that was starting to consume me. If I failed then the pain would be gone forever. Either way, I would take it.

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A/N: I'm going to do some horrible things in the next chapter or two. I toned this one down a lot for Kazama-Chan but next chapter I kill at least one person and I know it won't be liked. I'm also considering killing another character atm but I'm not sure yet. If you want to save anyone in particular let me know. I'll think about limiting my killing spree. Remember we have Jared, Seth, Sam, Jacob, Embry, Quil and Paul to kill off. The newbies don't count. Anyway prepare for some sadness to come!