A/N: Time to wrap this puppy up! I need to get this story done soon because its well overdue. The next chap might be the last one with the 20th being an idea I was working on for a sequel. That being said its 4am and I've been out all night so right now is probably not the best time to commit to anything...lol. This chapter is strange. We're weaving in and out of different time lines here. It makes sense in my sleep deprived brain. Hope it makes sense to you guys.

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LPOV

Seven months. Four days. Roughly Eighteen hours.

It seemed longer. More like years then months. It was because he wasn't here. It was because I had no idea if he was dead or alive. It was because eternity would be a punishment to anyone who was alone. A punishment that was not undeserved. Figuring out that I needed him, that I wanted him so late...another mistake made glaringly obvious with the gift of hindsight.

The time helped. It helped to lessen the intensity of desperation. It decreased the urge I had to burst through my skin and go looking for him, to hunt him down. Time helped to morph it into other emotions. Self-pity, regret, remorse. I was well acquainted with the feelings associated with unrequited love. That didn't make it any easier.

But time moves on. Something's change, something's don't. It waits for no one, least of all those who are suspended in it.

Seven months. Four days. Roughly Nineteen hours.

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Emily was baking again. Blueberry muffins from the familiar smell. She loved the reaction she got from the boys. The way their faces lit up in gratitude at the food she supplied. Truth was these were the same boys that would eat cardboard if they were hungry enough. Never the less they were always quick to praise her cooking and each morning she would be up before dawn to start her prep.

I couldn't say I blamed her. Although Seth and Jake were the only ones who actually lived here the rest of the pack managed to star their day in our kitchen. Putting her naturally maternal instincts to good use, she always had plenty of food ready as well as a smile and a kind word. They loved her for it and she loved them for humouring her. It was a fair trade. It had taken a long time to get here but she was almost the Emily of before. As close as anyone could hope.

I walked into the kitchen to be greeted by another equally familiar sight. Jake, Seth and Paul were sitting at the dining table. None of them noticed my entrance though. All three sets of eyes were on the oven timer. Not a second late it went off and the guys exchanged an anticipatory smile.

"You three are pathetic, you know that?" I half laughed my greeting.

"Morning Lee's" both Jake and Paul replied, brushing off my comments as they usually did.

"Oh whatever Lee. Your timing is pretty convenient, don't you think?" Seth replied half joking, half defensive.

I smiled at the kid and sat at the table, pouring a bowl of cereal as if I wasn't salivating at the thought of Emily's freshly baked goods. Jake had clearly not been up for long judging by his dishevelled appearance. Seth was much the same. They had both made the living room their bedroom each taking one of the two large couches available. Seth started hanging out here a few months back, crashing on the couch at night. It got to the point where he was leaving so early in the morning that Emily joked he should just stay here. And so he did. Jake took to the couch not long after, but for other reasons...

The door opened then, jarring me from my train of thought. Colin and Jared entered, heading straight for the table. They had both just finished patrol and were starving. Greeting the other boys with a slap on the back, they stoped as Jared nodded a hello in my direction. Things were still a little awkward between us since the last Clearwater house party and Jared only made it worse by drudging up the memory whenever we ran together. He didn't mean too nor did he want to, but whenever I was in his head there it was. It had meant a little more to him then it did to me and I cringed at the thought of ever running with him again. Jake made sure we limited our patrol together as much as possible. For that I was grateful.

Emily entered with two large dishes of food. Jake jumped up to help her and she took her usual place next to him at the dining table. The guys always waited until she was plated up out of respect and each time she would insist on them eating first. They would joke that there would be nothing left if she did and she pretended to begrudgingly comply. If I didn't know and love her so much it would probably make me ill watching such a show at every meal. This was one of the now many reasons she got up in the mornings though. They gave her a purpose and I loved them for it, as annoying as it was watch.

Excusing myself from the table early I began work on the clean up in the kitchen. Emily came in and insisted that I leave it, much like every other meal time. I too played this game telling her it was nothing and I was glad to help. She rubbed my back in thanks and returned to the table to share in the conversation. It wasn't that I didn't enjoy being with the guys. I loved them all like brothers, even Paul and Jared. It was getting harder and harder to put my mask on each day. To pretend that wasn't thinking about him. I wasn't thinking about a life that could have been. To pretend I wasn't trying desperately to forget him and move on. He had pleaded with me once and my mind often wandered back to that conversation .

"I've thought about it and we can make it work. Marry me Leah. I promise that if Jacob can fight an imprint so can I. We'll leave him in charge of the pack and move away. La Push can do without us for a while. You'll study like you wanted and I'll work to support us. We can try for a family, adopting if it doesn't work out. If not there is travelling, seeing the world. The best part of all of this is that time is on our side. Please Leah."

But he couldn't fight the imprint, he didn't want to. I had him before the battle, before the imprint. If we had only left when he suggested.

I felt the cracks showing in my facade. I had to hide away, pull myself together. Watching them still deep in conversation I slipped away to my room closing the door lightly behind me. I contemplated turning the TV on to allow my brain to go numb. Reading a book, listening to some music, even going back to sleep. But I knew that this did nothing but postpone the inevitable so I sat in place allowing the familiar thoughts to run through my mind. A light tap on the door saved me at just the right time. It opened slightly and Jacob let himself in. He closed it carefully behind him and spoke in a low voice.

"Looks like you're getting ready to leave Lee."

"How did you…."

It never failed to amaze me how observant he was. He could pick up my mood before I had figured it out myself. I had said nothing of my plans to leave or allowed myself to think it when I was in my wolf form. But it was Jake of course. There was no use in hiding anything from him. He moved to sit next to me on the bed, our legs touching. Looking into my eyes I could already tell the conversation was going to be heavy.

"You've been de-cluttering lately as well as avoiding us. You know you can't lie Lee's, when you want to keep something private you just shut yourself off for a bit."

He was sweeter then he realised. Too sweet for me. Too good for me. We hadn't broken up officially, neither wanting to confirm it in an attempt to avoid the "breakup talk" that would follow. We just let it fade. It was easy to do with everything we had to deal with.

When Embry first left Emily refused to talk to anyone but Jake for almost a month. She thought we had all betrayed her by allowing Embry to be so close when he had imprinted. At the time she saw it as something more sinister and refused to allow us to correct her. Mom and I were on the top of her traitor list. Seth was guilty by association. Each day Jake would sit with her, talking when she needed it, but mostly just being there for her. He would come to bed exhausted, the task mentally draining. We all wanted to be there for her, to take some of the burden off of Jake, but she refused. She needed the space. She needed time. She needed him.

It only took a month before she tried to connect with us again. We knew it wouldn't be long. She was far too affectionate by nature and shutting people out wasn't as easy for her as it was for me. Jake was to thank for a large part of that. He had helped pull her out of her depression. No longer needing to be babysat on suicide watch he could relax and just be with her. He and Seth had become a tag team of comedians, each feeding off of the laughter they would bring her. When her face lit up it was hard to notice the scars that were a constant reminder of our lost brother. I took the girly stuff. The more emotional breakdowns. Nursing my own broken heart I found it easier to focus on supporting Emily. At least Embry was alive. The fact that he was in love with the very woman I was consoling was just fates way of confirming how fucked up my life was.

Months passed and we become closer. A small family of our own. Jake, Seth and I had all started work so we could pay for essentials. Emily spent a lot of time volunteering for the Quileute community group. She was always big on culture and taught a lot of the younger girls how to dance. It kept her happy and she could spend time with children which she loved. Jake and the other boys would watch in a show of support. Jake insisted upon it. His connection with Emily was a lot closer then ours had ever been. I knew he didn't regret our relationship but I could see how he was with Em and whether they knew it or not there was something there. Something I was jealous of.

Jake and I were well and truly done. We'd had a few good times since then but he gave too much of himself to Emily for there to be a real relationship between us. He wasn't the kind of guy that sex alone would satiate, not that it hadn't helped us both through a few rough patches. But he felt guilty at the pleasure he would get as Emily suffered. Pretty soon it was too much. He felt uncomfortable with us being in together with her only a bedroom away. I didn't mind the whole outdoorsy thing but a girl can only handle washing dirt and twigs out of her hair so much. That's when he started making excuses to sleep in the lounge. Eventually, he stopped making the excuses. Even before hand I could feel him slipping away from me but I also knew I didn't want to fight it. As soon as I lost Embry for good my heart was gone. As much as I tried to return to that state of denial I had lived in for so long it was now a fact. Jake realised this just as much as I did.

We both knew it was time. We had each rehearsed this conversation enough times in our heads that we didn't need to speak it. It felt like it had been spoken a million times before. Jake moved to talk but I put my hand on his cheek stroking it slightly. Moving towards his lips I pressed a soft kiss into them and he returned it lightly. We held on to one another for a moment and I smiled at the confirmation that the spark was gone.

He moved back, his face evidence that he shared the same relief as I did. Nothing more needed to be said. We still loved one another but it was no longer the love of before. It was easier now. The pressure was no longer there.

"So we're okay?" he said.

"We'll always be okay Jake." I replied.

"I know Lee's. How could you resist this smile?" he flashed those pearly white's at me and I slapped him across the back. It was funny how only a year ago that very look would have made me melt. I still loved it but in a different way now. I was glad for that. If I thought I would lose Jake in this breakup there would be a possibility that I'd have stayed for the wrong reasons. His heart was with someone else now too. I knew that was why he was willing to let me go so easily. What I didn't know was if he knew that yet. A little encouragement was all he needed.

"Well now that's official" I smiled at him "you can finally make a move on Emily, guilt free."

He looked genuinely shocked. I couldn't be sure if he was shocked that I had figured him out or that he hadn't figured it out himself.

"Ahh, Emily? Nah, we're just…"

"You trying to convince me or yourself Black? You know you've fallen for her. Pretty hard too. I know you hate to cook and yet every night you're there helping her and watching observantly. Seems strange you never cook on your own though." I said sarcastically."You're always looking for a reason to touch her, taking things from her hands. Laughing, joking...do I need to go on?"

"Okay, okay. So I'm not the only observant one. Wow, I can see why that annoys people so much"

He took in a deep breath as I sat quietly looking at the floor. Those two would need to figure themselves out. I had too many other things on my mind to play matchmaker. We sat in silence for a while and I felt the mood become serious again.

"So when are you leaving?"

"I was going to wait until I worked up the nerve to have this conversation but now that's it's done...tonight."

He looked shocked. I hid my own shock at the words as they left my mouth. I had wanted to wait a few days but there seemed to be no point now.

"So soon?" he asked.

"Why not?" my smooth reply hid the panic from my voice.

"Are you going after him?"

I dropped my eyes at the un-expectant question. Jake hadn't spoken of Embry in months and I wasn't sure how he felt about him after he abandoned his imprint when she needed him the most. I knew he was still livid that Embry had almost forced himself on me. He was still my alpha after all. My alpha and my best friend.

"No Jake. I know there is no point. He's in love with Emily. I just need to go somewhere else for a while you know? I think he had the right idea. I need to be in a world without werewolves and vampires. Maybe get a boring office job and live in an overpriced apartment somewhere. Take night classes for a while. I have plenty of time."

He stayed quiet for a while, no doubt thinking my words over. I wanted to keep the conversation as short as possible. It wasn't up for discussion. My mind was made up. Jake knew that. He wasn't stupid enough to try and convince me otherwise.

"I'm going to miss you Lee's, I'm not going to pretend I won't. You know I love you and if there is anything I can do to keep you here then tell me and it will be done. I'm sure Emily, Seth and even Sue wouldn't mind me speaking on their behalf. Because I know you so well I also know that you can't be talked out of this. Just promise me one thing ok?"

I looked up at him now, sighing at the mention of a promise he attempted to tack on like an after thought. I was positive I wouldn't like whatever it was.

"Just stay for one more night, please? We need to give you a real farewell in the style of an old Clearwater house party."

He was grinning again as he nudged my arm. I rolled my eyes and looked back at him. It would be so much easier to slip out of the house unnoticed but a real farewell was also a good idea. I didn't know how long I would be gone for and, as much as I didn't want to admit it, I would miss everyone incredibly. I begrudgingly accepted.

"Fantastic." He replied, jumping to his feet. "I gotta go get this sorted. Let me talk to the guys and break the news. It'll be easier if I tell Em's. She's going to be pretty torn up."

"You mean it'll be easier if you're there to consol her?" I said, my tone implying exactly what I wanted it to imply.

"Oh come on Lee's, don't make me have to kill you before you get a chance to leave." He laughed and ran his large hand through my hair. I shook it off as he made his way over to the door.

"I'm going straight out after I tell the guys. I'll be home later for dinner. Trust me Lee's, you won't regret this ok?"

I sighed as he had closed the door behind him too quickly to allow for a protest. Laying back on my bed the prospect of leaving La Push finally hit me. A new life was waiting for me. A life away from obligation, from the pressure of being a protector. A life where I could be a twenty year old girl starting out in the world. A life where I could get over him and find someone else to move on with.

Only one more day to go.

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