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Committed—Part Three

Owen parked his blue pickup a few feet away from Derek Shepherd's car. The sandy parking lot was empty. The inclement weather made the beach inhospitable to the average tourist and oddly perfect for their purposes. "I can't believe we both thought of this place last night."

"Weird," Cristina muttered as she unclipped her seatbelt.

"In a good way." Owen reached out and brushed a stray curl behind her ear. Cristina was dressed in a burgundy sweater and a pair of black slacks that lightly hugged her every curve. Her hair was held back with a plain cloth band, exposing just enough of her neck to drive his pulse rate right into the stratosphere. He let his fingers linger on the soft skin below her ear and smiled. "You look beautiful."

"Oh cut it out. You sound like a frat boy looking to score."

"Then it's a good thing you didn't put your hair all the way up or we wouldn't make it out of the truck." Cristina rolled her eyes but the flush of heat beneath his fingers told the real story. She did not move as he leaned across to kiss her gently on the lips.

She smiled against his mouth. "They're waiting."

"So?"

Cristina kissed him quickly and then slipped out of the truck. She walked over to Derek's car and leaned into the open window to speak to Meredith. Derek popped up from the driver's side a moment later and nodded a greeting. Owen nodded back but made no move to get out of the truck.

Devoid of more pleasant activities, his restless hands settled on the steering wheel and his mind strayed to the past. The last time he had visited this beach was the day before he left for his final tour in Iraq. The vestiges of the ice storm had melted away and full Indian summer baked the sand and stones. It was a day of body surfing and a night of campfires and conversation. Good memories now tinged with darkness as only ghosts of the men he saw that day remained. Today was as important to Cristina and himself as it was to Derek and Meredith. His first chance to construct new, positive memories on the backs of the old ones. Fine in theory not so easy in practice Owen realized as a rush of blood prickled his skin and the taste of iron flooded his mouth. The scents of salt and seaweed were sharp in his nostrils and the voices of a dozen comrades sounded in his ears. Owen focused on Cristina waiting in front of the truck and concentrated on his breathing as Wyatt had advised. Willing his heart to slow and his hands to relax their iron grip, he counted backwards from a thousand. He reached five hundred before the sensations associated with the memories began to slowly subside.

"Are you okay?" Cristina asked quietly when he joined her a couple minutes later.

"I used to love this beach." He smiled weakly. "I'll learn to love it again."

"You can't force it, Owen." At his nod, she gestured towards Meredith standing silhouetted against the water. "Meredith wants to talk to you first."

Owen cocked a curious eyebrow. "Why?"

"She didn't tell me."

The statement did not ring entirely true. Owen waited, hoping she would elaborate. Cristina merely shook her head and gave his shoulder a firm shove. Irritated and more unsettled than he cared to admit, Owen walked across the shifting beach. He kept his expression carefully neutral as he approached Meredith.

She turned towards the ocean when Owen drew abreast of her. "You think your relationship with Cristina is none of my business?"

He nodded, knowing she was watching out of the corner of her eye.

Meredith dragged stray strands of hair out of her face. "I was happy when she started seeing you. Her last relationship…didn't end well." She frowned and forced her hands into her pockets. "I thought you were good for her. She seemed…happy. And that's not like Cristina."

Owen blinked the wind tears from his eyes and braced for the anger simmering just beneath the surface of her reasonable tone.

"And then you nearly killed her and your relationship became my business," Meredith kept her eyes on the horizon line, her voice low and sharp as a scalpel. "She told me what happened that night. Told me you were wounded and that I should butt out. Then she stopped talking about you entirely and I thought it was over. And now you're together again and I don't care what happened in Iraq or how screwed up it made you." Meredith bit her lip and turned to look him in the eye. "We're not in the Pit or in an O.R. You're no one to me except the person who has somehow changed my friend. I don't want to like you because of what happened but hating you isn't an option because you mean too much to her and…she means too much to you."

She was angry and honest and Owen respected her for it. Liked her, even if she would never genuinely reciprocate the feeling. There was only one way to respond to the fear lying beneath the courage that had allowed her to speak. "Why are you here today, Meredith?"

"You know why. In fact it was partly your idea."

"You could have signed the papers at city hall and gone home without coming to this beach. You didn't need Cristina and you didn't want me," Owen pointed out patiently. "So why are you here?"

Meredith shrugged.

"You're here to make a public commitment to Derek Shepherd. Not just a legal one."

"You don't know anything about us."

"I know he loves you."

She pushed irritably at her flying bangs. "So why are you here?"

"My reasons aren't so different from yours. A commitment to building something new on the bones of something old." He bit back a weary sigh and shook his head. "You don't have to like me and I don't expect you to understand what happened that night in Cristina's apartment. I do respect who you are to Cristina. I simply ask that you do the same for me." He turned away. Unsure if he had said enough or too much. Certain only that trust lay in Meredith's hands and not in his.

Owen did not stop walking until he reached the jumble of rocks Cristina was sitting on. With a grunt of effort he climbed up and sat beside her. "You knew what she wanted to say?"

Cristina nodded.

"Thanks for the warning."

"I promised her I wouldn't say anything."

"In exchange for letting me come along?" Owen did not expect the shades of guilt and remorse that darkened her eyes. He offered a small smile to ease the sting. "I knew it was coming. It was just a matter of time."

"She means well."

"I wouldn't have stood there and listened if she didn't."

"That easy?"

He laughed. "No!"

"So, now what?"

"Now we do what we came here to do." He tentatively covered the hand resting on her thigh with his. After a moment's hesitation, Cristina's hand turned over and their fingers laced loosely together. Owen felt the tension ebb away with the unfamiliar sensation. Cristina did not hold hands or embrace easily. Each touch was a gift. The kiss on the bridge the day of Izzy's death easily the bravest act she had initiated since they met nearly a year ago. He yearned for more, impatient with her fears and his own troublesome emotions. Wishing he had the strength to teach her the simple joy of touch.

"You were thinking about your unit earlier?"

He nodded mutely.

"Do you want to talk about them later?"

Owen blinked into the wind. His thumb rubbed her palm in jerky strokes. "Maybe," he murmured hoarsely. "Maybe later."

"Okay." Cristina gestured to the couple standing on the beach. "I think they're ready for us.

Owen nodded reluctantly and rose to help her down from the rocks. Back on the sand he started to release her hand. Cristina tightened her grip and held on for a several seconds before letting go. Owen trailed after her, grateful for her concern and the gesture of comfort that followed. The residual heat of her touch made his palm tingle and he pulled up his coat collar to hide a smile that might embarrass her.

"Okay?" Cristina asked when they were both close enough to be heard over the waves.

Meredith glanced at Derek and shrugged. "Ready?"

"Definitely," he answered, bending to kiss her lightly on the mouth.

"Jumping the gun, aren't you?" Owen teased good-naturedly.

Meredith rolled her eyes.

Cristina pointed to the crinkled post-it note in Derek's hand. "So, let's hear them."

Derek flashed a sheepish grin and cleared his throat. "I Derek Shepherd promise to love you Meredith Grey even when I hate you. No running, ever, nobody walks out no matter what happens. I promise to take care of you even when we're old and smelly and senile. And if you get Alzheimer's I will remind you every day of who I am. This is forever." He reached out and gently brushed the hair from her eyes. "Your turn."

Meredith licked her lips. Her eyes jumped to Cristina and then Owen before sliding back to Derek. Taking a deep breath, she plucked the post-it from his fingers. "I Meredith Grey promise to love you Derek Shepherd even when I hate you. No running, ever, nobody walks out no matter what happens. I promise to take care of you even when we're old and grey. And if you get Alzheimer's I will remind you every day of who I am. This is forever." She held the note by the edges to show Cristina and Owen the signatures.

"Now you may kiss the bride," Owen said softly. As the newlyweds came together he looked at Cristina. Her smile was restrained, her thoughts obviously divided. He fingered the folded slip of paper in his pocket and wondered if the timing was right.

"Do you want to get a drink at Joe's?"

Owen flinched at the unexpected question. Meredith had turned to face Cristina but her attention was focused on him.

"I think Owen has something he wants to say first." Derek interjected.

"What?" Meredith and Cristina asked in unison.

Owen shifted nervously from foot to foot. For a second, he was annoyed at Derek for taking the decision to act out of his hands. Confronted by Cristina's curious and vaguely alarmed expression however, he knew there would never be a better time.

"What's this about?" Meredith demanded. "You're not…"

Derek slipped an arm around her shoulders. "Give the man a chance to talk."

Owen quirked a lip to acknowledge the comment then his eyes flicked to Meredith. Registering the challenge and the cautious overture of acceptance the drink offer had been. Forcing down an anxious shudder, he focused on Cristina.

The declaration was Derek's idea: a thank you for suggesting how he might solidify his bond with Meredith. Owen rejected it at first. He and Cristina had just gotten back together and the incident in the Pit proved how tetchy his recovery process could be. The argument held no water for Derek and Owen quickly found himself on the receiving end of the same reasoning he had used earlier in the evening. He left the Emerald City bar a few minutes later and spent several hours pondering what he might say. The first light of dawn dredged up a few simple words. Owen jotted them down still unsure if he would actually have the courage to speak when the time came.

Standing on the windswept beach with his heart pounding harder than the surf, Owen made a decision and left the paper in his pocket. The words were reminders of where he had been, not where his heart was hoping to go. He reached out and took Cristina's cold hands in his. "I asked you out and then I showed up drunk. I asked you for another chance and you said yes. I pushed you away but you would not leave. I fell apart…and you put me back together. You listened even when you didn't want to hear." He squeezed her fingers and she squeezed back. Owen sighed jaggedly as the next words tumbled out. "I hurt you even though I loved…love you more than I can explain. I will be a better man. A better man for you and a better man with you. All I ask is that you meet me halfway."

Cristina held his eyes, her lips moving soundlessly as she considered a reply. Without warning, she pulled him close and kissed him. Her hands slipped from his and the kiss deepened as her fingers stroked the back of his neck and slid down to rest on his shoulders. Owen threaded his fingers through her thick hair and savored the warmth of her eager mouth soft and malleable beneath his. His hands dropped to her shoulders and gently cupped them until they had to pull apart to breathe.

A broad, sweet smile lifted Cristina's cheeks. "Yes," she whispered fervently. "Yes!"

~THE~END~