Personally, I like writing in Edward's POV better because it's easier. I have no idea why, though.

So far, this is the chapter I liked writing the best.

Enjoy! :)

-MW-

Chapter 2

"You Can't Break A Broken Heart – Kate Voegele"

Edward POV

I wanna know why on earth you thought this would look good on me. Red is not my color.

But you loved that color, which is why I let you buy this for me in the first place. I think that's the only reason I ever let you buy me things. It didn't matter to me if it made me look stupid, as long as you loved whatever it was, I let you get it for me. It didn't matter that you fed me three servings of shrimp on our anniversary – which I was deathly allergic to by the way. It didn't matter to me how badly my feet were aching after six straight hours of shopping and you barely even bought anything in any of those stores, because you made me feel like the luckiest man alive.

Whenever we were together, all of my insecurities and reservations just disappeared. When I'd come home from work, you'd be the first one to welcome me home and have dinner ready. You understood my hectic schedule; whether I was working late again or a business trip to the other end of the world that couldn't wait until the morning.

But that was it, wasn't it? I was gone a lot. I never really had enough time to spend with you. I was too focused, keeping my eyes on the prize. But, as always, you understood. I've been working for this for all of my life, and you understood that I needed to be away so often.

You know, sometimes I'd wish that you weren't so kind. Sometimes I wanted you to get mad at me for coming home late, or forgetting that it was my turn to pick out a movie for our movie marathons. Maybe something like that would have knocked some sense into me. Maybe… Maybe if I wasn't busy working, and maybe if I hadn't turned my phone off that night, you would still be here with me, Tanya.

I stood up from my leather swivel chair and made my way to the window across the room that had a view overlooking the city. This, I thought, was supposed to be it. I was finally at the top. After years and years of convincing my father that I was ready to take over the company for him, after all those late nights and all those meetings, I was finally here. But something inside me, that little nagging voice, was telling me that there was much more to be done. I just shrugged it off. Maybe it was about co-planning that Charity Ball with the Swans. Yeah, that must be it. It was the highlight of both the companies, and nothing was ever underdone.

But wasn't their company having some problems right now? Carlisle told me that they were. He said that he wasn't even sure if there would be any social events hosted by the Swans this year. What was that supposed to mean?

"Mr. Cullen?"

I turned around to see that my assistant, Lauren, was standing halfway through my doorway.

"Yes, Lauren?" Did I have a meeting that I didn't know about?

"Sir, your father would like to have a word with you." She answered.

"Did he say about what?"

"No, sir."

"Alright. Thank you. Tell him I'll be there in a minute."

"Yes, sir."

I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. Whenever my father wanted to 'have a word' with me, he'd usually take the opportunity to convince me that I didn't have to run this company. He always thought that I just used it as a distraction from what happened a year ago.

I went out the door and made my way to my father's office on the upper level.

Okay, fine, maybe I was using work as a distraction. But putting that aside, who else was going to run this place when he retired? Emmett? I snorted. I don't think so.

"Hello, James." I greeted my father's assistant.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Cullen."

"Is he busy?" I asked.

"No, he just got out of a meeting with the board."

The board?

"Thanks, James."

"You're welcome, sir."

I did three quick knocks on the frosted glass door and took a look inside. Sure enough, there was my father, sitting on one of his single couches, looking out the window. He seemed to be thinking about something important because his hands were together, with his chin resting on top – something he always did.

I cleared my throat to get his attention.

"Oh, Edward! Come in!" I walked into his office and sat in the seat across from him, blocking his view of the city.

"You… wanted to see me?"

"Yes, yes…" He trailed off. He had that look on his face again that showed he was thinking of something important. I coughed to get his attention.

"Sorry," he smiled sheepishly at me.

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?" I asked. I wanted to get back to my work as soon as possible.

"You remember Charles Swan, right?"

"Of course," He was the CEO and founder of Swan Corp. "Why?"

He took a long moment to answer me. I saw a lot of sadness in his eyes. I learned over the years that Carlisle and Charlie were very good friends. Something must have happened to him.

"He died of a heart attack. His funeral's today." He said, looking at me, smiling sadly. I had no response to that, so I just waited for my father to continue.

"There is a… gathering in his house, and a service in the cemetery."

"I'll be there, dad." I promised.

Then his mouth turned into this smile, the kind that I only saw once before when I'd told him what I had planned for me and Tanya.

"But that's not the reason why I called you here," he started, "I don't like to beat around the bush, son, so I'll just come out and say it," he took in a deep breath and said the words that made me almost want to smile again, like I did with Tanya.

"I'm giving you the company."

I sat there, across from my father, thinking… Well, I wasn't thinking. My mind wasn't exactly working at that moment. I was too overjoyed! The company's mine?

"Really?" I said above a whisper, a smile beginning to form itself on my face. I cannot believe this is happening to me. I cannot wait to tell Ta –

My heart suddenly fell and the smile immediately turned into a hard line.

She's gone, remember? My inner voice said.

She's never coming back, and it's all your fault.

"Edward?" my father's voice rang.

"Yes…"

He sighed. I knew that he knew what I was thinking about. He told me that he'd been hoping that my wounds would be able to heal from what happened a year ago.

I pinched the bridge of my nose, something I did, my mother noticed, whenever I was feeling any negative emotion.

A year ago I fell in love with a wonderful woman named Tanya Denali. A year ago I began to feel something for someone that wasn't my family. I began to care for something other than work, I was able to put somebody else's needs before mine. A year ago, one night, I was swimming in paperwork so I locked myself in my office to be able to finish them on time so I turned off my phone, and it wasn't until later on that I heard the voicemail that Tanya left for me, telling me she was on her way to be with me, and then I heard tires screech and the collision –

"There is one condition."

My head shot up at this. A condition?

"A condition?" I repeated.

"Yes."

"What is it?" I've come too far to let this slip away now. So whatever condition he had, I was ready for it.

"Again, I'll get straight to the point… Edward, I want you to have a life outside of this place."

I raised my eyebrow, trying to understand his condition. This seriously confused me.

"I don't understand."

He sighed and then chuckled lightly, as if laughing at his own private joke.

"Last year…"

Oh.

"Last year…" he repeated "wasn't a good year for all of us. I know how you feel, son. Believe me, I do. I loved her like she was one of my own."

"I know, dad." I clenched my fists. Talking about what happened – to anyone, even my own family – never helped me even try to get over it.

Silence followed. This was unusual for the two of us, whenever we talked.

"She would want you to move on, son."

I know, my heart told me. But my head said otherwise,

"You cannot honestly believe that I can love another girl like I loved Tanya!!!" I couldn't take it anymore. Was he serious? How could any other woman replace her? She was one of a kind. Nobody could ever compare to her!

"I meant, move on with your life."

"She was my life!" I said harshly. I couldn't look him in the eyes anymore. I would've snapped if I didn't get out of here soon. So I stood up and briskly walked to the door when his next words stopped me.

"Edward, you will follow through with this. Your trust fund is still under my name, as well as this company."

Was he serious?

"You're holding them hostage?" I asked incredulously. I've been of age for four years now, what makes him think he can stop me from even taking my trust fund?

"The company owns the bank, Edward." He said, as if he knew what I was thinking.

Carlisle sighed and stood up. I could hear him approaching me from behind.

"Edward," he said, this time his voice was gentle.

"I don't want this to ruin your chances at a normal life."

I bit my lip, hard, then spoke,

"Dad, I doubt my life will ever be normal again."

He sighed one more time.

"Edward, you will try." His voice rang with finality.

I couldn't stand to be in here anymore. So I swung the door open, leaving him in there before calling out over my shoulder,

"I'll see you at the funeral."

"He cannot be serious!" I said to myself, pacing around my office. I was going to dig a hole on where I was standing. I tried to be rational; I thought of all the pros and cons in this situation:

Pros:

Tanya would have wanted this. She made me promise her. She said that if ever anything were to happen to her, she would want me to keep living my life.

Cons:

I would never be able to do it.

I sat on my black leather couch and put my head in my hands, contemplating on all these thoughts when suddenly, an idea started forming itself in my head.

My father wanted me to have a life outside this office. That was the requirement I had to meet before he handed over to me his company and my trust fund. So, I just had to have an extra-curricular activity of some sort like a sport or a book club. But that would only get in the way of my work here, and while I knew I had to have something in my life other than work, I didn't want to be slacking off either.

"So, what would be the easiest and most convenient?" I asked myself.

Suddenly my phone rang. I checked the caller ID and flipped the silver gadget open.

"Alice." I greeted my sister.

"Edward, are you picking us up for the funeral?" her voice was scratchy and she was sobbing a little, probably from crying. Charlie Swan was like a second father to her, and my father didn't mind. He was glad that Charlie was so close to all of us, except for me. I was too busy, even back then, trying to get my father to see that I was capable to run this company by myself. I was never around enough.

"Are you alright, Ali?"

"Y-yeah… I'm fine." She sniffed.

"What time do you need me?" I asked, trying to distract her.

"Um, well, the gathering's going to be at three o'clock. "

I checked my watch for the time, "2:30," I said to myself.

"What?" Alice asked.

"Nothing, just checking the time," I got up from my position on the couch and started putting away the files I was working on earlier.

"I'll see you in 5, Al." I said, checking my attire to make sure I didn't have to waste more time by changing. Black slacks, black tie, white shirt, black jacket… Good enough, I thought.

"Alright. See you, Edward."

After flipping my phone shut, my earlier thoughts came back to me.

What was I going to do about that ridiculously trite condition?

We drove up to the Swan residence in silence since I picked up my sister and my mother, Esme. There was some pleasant conversation every now and then between the both of them, but other than that, not a word was said.

"We're here," I said to both of them. They both got out of the car at the same time but before turning to leave, Alice turned to me,

"Bring the umbrella, it's supposed to rain today. We'll be in the front row," she said looking at the long line of cars on her left.

"I'll be there,"

"I'll see you in there, Edward," I nodded my head in response then went on my way to find a parking space.

Glancing at my watch, I cursed under my breath realizing that I had missed the gathering. Who knew that so many people were invited to Charlie's funeral? I certainly didn't. I ran as fast as I could with my umbrella in my hand. When I got to the Swans' house, they were all out in the backyard, saying their last words. Everybody's heads were hung low, so I took this opportunity to sneak into my seat.

Front row, front row, front row… Aha!

Before I sat down, I took a quick look at Charlie's daughter. She was standing next to the priest, her head hung low, like everybody else's. Her hands were together in front of her and her long brown hair was swaying as the wind came. I could tell that her eyes weren't closed because I saw some movement from her eyelids, it looked like she was blinking back tears. I felt sorry for this girl… She just lost her father and now she has to deal with all these people – half of whom she probably doesn't even know at all – and she has to take over her father's company all by herself at such a young age. And as far as I knew, she only had two adopted siblings, Rosalie and Jasper Hale, both of whom were sitting in the same row as we were and not up there with her. I suppose it didn't feel right to them.

I took the empty seat at the end next to Esme. She was crying hysterically and as soon as she saw me beside her, she fell into me and I had to put my arms around her to keep her from completely breaking down. I tried to speak into hear ear as much as possible to get her to sit up a little while I rubbed her upper arm up and down, trying to comfort her,

"Shh… It's okay, mom, it's okay…" I repeated to her barely above a whisper.

Being in a cemetery didn't appeal to me one bit. It reminded me of death wherever I looked, for obvious reasons. And my thoughts of death just kept bringing me back to Tanya. Everything I saw, everything I touched, reminded me of some memory we had together. So I would understand if Charlie's daughter didn't want to have anything to do with the world after this. I suppose I had it easier than she, I mean, I still had all of my family with me. But all the same, I can genuinely sympathize with her right now.

As I was watching everybody drop a single white rose one by one on the ground around Charlie's grave, realization dawned upon me… I loved Tanya, with all of my heart. And I know she loved me too. Nothing could change that. But if there was some way that all this could be put behind me, that my heart wouldn't ache for her so much, that I wouldn't be hurting anymore… Wouldn't her love for me be able to finally set me free?

"Bella…" So that's her name. "Are you alright?" Alice asked the girl.

Bella didn't look away from her father's grave when she answered,

"I'm fine, Alice, really. You should go home, be with your family."

"Are you sure? I could stay…" Alice insisted.

"No. You – go." She said with finality.

Alice sighed. It was so unlike her to give up.

"Alright. Call me if you need anything. At all."

"Thank you, Alice." Bella responded.

"Anytime, Bella. Oh and don't stay out here too late. I heard it was supposed to rain really hard tonight."

"I won't."

"Bye, Bella." Alice walked back to me, and with a tired look in her eyes she turned her head to me. She'd be asleep even before she got in the car.

"Let's go." She walked back to the car first. I stayed behind for a while, trying to convey a silent message to Bella. I tried to tell her with my mind that everything was going to be okay.

Losing someone you love is never the easiest thing in the world. And whether you know it or not, it can and will drastically change your life forever. At first, it would seem like everything is crashing down around you. You find yourself putting up walls and thinking, 'There is nothing for me anymore.' And it will look like that at first, because everything you see around you will remind you of how good things used to be, how you wish things would go back to being that way. Every memory breaks your heart piece by piece. Everything you hear makes you want to become deaf to the words you know will never be spoken again. Every single thing will tear you apart.

But none of that means that the world is going to end. It's times like this that give you the chance to start again. Not to escape from the pain, but to genuinely renew yourself and create from it something that you will be proud of one day. Because behind every dark cloud is a silver lining. After the night, there is day – there is light. There is hope again.

Knowing Charlie, he would have probably already said something like that to her in some point in her life. That didn't stop me from trying, anyway. As far as I could see, this girl was all alone now. Sitting on the ground, next to her father, I could tell she was saying goodbye. I took this as my cue to leave but not before leaving the yellow umbrella I was holding on one of the chairs.

She'd be needing this, I thought, then made my way towards the car. I started the engine and drove down the road, trying to see through the rain.

As I was approaching a stoplight at red, staring at it, I tried to ask for a sign. Anything that would tell me I was free. I want to be free. Free from the anger I felt towards myself, free from the regret I feel when I wake up every morning, free from the self-pity I drown in because I was too much of a coward to start living again, but most of all… free from the scathing wounds that Tanya's death had left on my spirit.

Please… Give me a sign… Tanya…

And then it turned green.

R&R please! :)

-MW-