Argh commercials, I hate them so badly. A certain guy that everyone knows is going to be in here and screw the date. Will Chris stay sane?
Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon
CGU: Whoever you are.
Bill: Bill.
CGU: Whatever you do.
Bill: Al Paccar breeder.
CGU: We will be with you in CG…
BANG!!!
Some guy: Oh shit, someone has shot the CGU singer. Oh fuck it's a gnome. EVERYONE RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!
BANG!!!
Chris: There's nothing to see here.
Commercial Break Ends…
Chris quickly ran back to the stage after shooting the people who are behind the CGU ad.
Chris: Annoying dicks, so anyway…
Chris got called to the back for a few seconds, and when he came back out.
Chris: Excuse me I have just received information that the ratings of this show has doubled because everyone found out that I shot the CGU people. Not even the police force cares, because they too wanted to shoot those people.
*flashback*
Cop: This damn ad is so addictive and annoying.
*click*
Another cop: I'm gonna go kill those motherfukckers who invented it.
Cop: Hey you are part of the Police force, you can't. We will just wait for someone else to do it and we won't give a shit.
The other cop nodded.
*flashback ended*
Chris: My dear audiences I have just also been told the girls have arrived at the restaurant. Let's go watch what happens on this beautiful big TV.
Tomi: Looks pretty cheap to me.
Mark: Yeah this little man is a gay cheapscay. Hey that's rhymes haha.
Alexis: Subject #74 is about to show us what the girls are doing, keep an eye on him.
Alexis was talking into a walkie talkie. Everyone began to look at the TV as a picture popped up.
Tanner: WHY ARE THEY AT A FISH AND CHIPS PLACE?
Chris: They are not at a Fish and Chips place you moron.
Tanner: Kiss my ass.
On the TV…
Misty: Guess I'm first.
Misty went into the restaurant wearing what she wore when she met Ash at the Hoenn region.
Gordon Ramsey: Ok orange haired bitch has entered the restaurant cooks!!! Cook the best meal you can for tonight, if it turns out crap I will take a shit on it!!!
Misty: Oh no not him.
Ash saw Misty and escorted her to their table. They were allowed to spend a few minutes with him. Misty and Ash ordered. She won't get to eat it though so one of the other girls will.
Gordon Ramsey: HURRY THE FUCK UP; THERE ARE ORDERS THAT NEED TO BE TAKEN!!!!!!!
Ramsey made this night a horror for the people in the restaurant, all they could hear was yelling. The next girl was May. She came in there with a red, shiny dress. It was obvious that May was one of the girls Ash found physically attractive, he kept staring at her breasts. Dawn was after May and she had on blue clothes that were pretty revealing. Ash touched her butt and squeezed it a few times.
Tanner: Dirty dog! Get your hands off her.
Mark: So is the chopping cock off option still there?
Tanner, Michael/Me: YES!! But we will do worse than that. We are going to chop his balls off as well and feed it to Chris. Then we will shove his dick up his ass.
Chris: I heard that you fuckers.
Chris ran up to Tanner and me. Alexis blocked his way and pushed him onto the ground. Chris grabbed her hair and…pulled it off?
Everyone: WHAT THE?
Alexis: Yes I'm a guy undercover. I was forced to dress as a girl by my boss to look less suspicious. I'm glad I don't have to wear this damn disguise anymore.
Michael/Me: Well that's understandable.
Chris: Undercover for what reason?
Alexis: I was spying on…Tomi. Tomi you are under arrest.
Tomi: What? That's bullshit. I paid fucking lots of money to get onto this show.
Chris: 5 bucks.
Tomi: Fuck you Chris.
Alexis took Tomi out and explained to him the truth. Tomi was forced to stay out of the stage and not near Chris. So Tomi went back home and watched it on the TV.
Chris: Well that's another poofter out of my show. I wonder who is going to come next week.
Back to the TV…
Annabel: Oh Ash that is so sweet.
Ash and Annabel did the French kiss. The audience began to go crazy; every single person watching wanted to know who was going to be with Ash.
Gordon Ramsey: YOU FUCKING DONKEY!!! FUCK OFF!!!
Ash and Annabel jumped as one of the chefs left the kitchen. When it was Angie's turn the food finally came. Misty ordered Fish and Chips. Angie spat it out.
Angie: Oh yuck! These assholes are trying to poison me.
Chris began to laugh.
Chris: Great show ah.
Everyone knew what he meant. Chris was happy that the girls were getting stuffed up. At last all the girls have done their date time. Of course they hardly got anytime but it was good to see which girl can start a date well. Ash on the other hand ate all his food in one gulp. He began to turn green.
Gordon Ramsey: LISTEN YOU FAT FUCKING PIG!!! YOU CAN'T PUT PUFFER FISH MEAT IN THAT SPAGETTI THAT KID ATE BECAUSE IT WASN'T CUT PROPERLY SO MIGHT OF KILLED HIM AND I'M GOING TO LOSE MY JOB!!!
Ash was immediately taken to the hospital with the girls weeping and hoping he was ok. The bus came back and all the girls were taken home. They would return in the next episode, next week.
Chris: Ok everyone since Ash is poisoned, we won't know if he will live and because of that he can't evict someone so we will have to wait till next week and we still have a few minutes of the show left so what do you want to do?
Alexis came back into the studio and sat down. He gave Chris the ok sign.
Mark: How about I tell everyone a story about a little man who was depressed and is a fucking loser.
Chris: Ok tell us.
Mark stood up.
Mark: Once upon a time…
Tanner: This story is shit.
Mark: Stop saying shit you cunt. As I was saying the little man's name is Chris.
Chris: OK…that's enough! You think I'm a loser?
Everyone: We all do.
Tanner: Not me.
Everyone: SHUT UP!
The bell for ending the show rang and Chris let off a sigh of relief.
Chris: Audience, next week there will be no challenge, we will have a break and let Ash rest a bit more before we do. I'm positive the girls are going to LOVE the next one. Also one girl will be eliminated next week too. Also wish me luck when I see Hartman again, it's going to get very messy.
Everyone: ???
END OF EPISODE 3
What will Chris do? Will Ash survive the poison and who will be eliminated? There are plenty more questions but we will get to that later. I will update soon.