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I APOLOGISE FOR NOT UPDATING SOONER BUT I DIDN'T FINISH THE CHAPTER OFF PROPERLY BEFORE LEAVING AND I JUST CAME BACK FROM NEW YORK ON MONDAY (FUNNILY ENOUGH CONCERNING THIS CHAPTER :P) SO I'VE BEEN SUPER TIRED AND JET LAGGED. ANYWAY, I'VE CAUGHT UP ON MY SLEEP AND I'VE PRETTY MUCH WRITTEN ALL THE DIALOGUE FOR CHAPTER 4 OF 'SHADOW OF THE BAT' NOW SO THOSE OF YOU FOLLOWING IT WILL BE PLEASED TO KNOW I'LL BE UPDATING IT REAL SOON :]

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is continuous from the last chapter but I did want to break it up a little! Anyways, things are pretty interesting in this second part too, read and see my wonderful audience! ;]

"See I thought love was black and white,
That it was wrong or it was right.
But you ain't leaving without a fight,
And I think I am just as torn inside." – 'Where I Stood' by Missy Higgins

Leaving Home: Part 2

"I think I'd better go talk to Jonathan." I told Red and broke the silence as I sat back up. She stayed where she was with her eyes closed peacefully as though she didn't have a care in the world. The alcohol definitely was taking its toll.

"So it's not Johnny now?" Pammy smirked, amusing herself but I couldn't help smiling even if she didn't see it, I could tell that was the response she wanted.

"Oh shush!" I told her and got up on my feet. I left my empty glass where it was on the grass, I wasn't planning on getting another drink after the talk. I'd had enough and I needed to be up early in the morning. Jonathan glanced up at me for a second before looking around almost nervously.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked as I took a seat next to him on the porch. I was really hoping Pammy wouldn't hear any of it but it was a fair distance from the porch to the bottom of the yard so as long as we weren't shouting then we would've been okay.

"Nothing really, just contemplating some things," he replied quietly and looked up to stare toward the bottom of the yard where Pammy lay on the grass being at one with nature. He had an uncertain look on his face and I knew he must have been wondering what he was going to do being stuck with Pammy. Would they even still talk to each other with me gone? They didn't exactly get along at the best of times; I often got told by Pammy that I was the only one holding the little 'group' together. Though I wouldn't really have called it a group of sorts. The way I saw it, there was me and Pammy, then me and Jonathan. We were divided from day one and continued to be. They were civil with each other but they only did it for my sake. Kind of funny considering how stubborn they are but that's what made the gesture that much more special. Was this what he was worrying about or was it what Pammy had told me? I needed to know.

"Care to tell me what things?" I leaned toward him and nudged him with my shoulder. He didn't necessarily enjoy close contact but I'd been drinking so the consideration concerning that went out the window. I realise that I was being unnecessarily flirty with him but he was a good looking guy after all and alcohol has the power to turn me into one of the flirtiest people you could ever meet. However he didn't appear to be phased by it. He could either tell how drunk I was or he really did like me that much. Either way I knew he could smell the vodka and coke on my breath.

"Oh it's nothing important, just some theories I've been working on." He replied, trying to give the excuse that it was work related which would have actually explained his 'phone calls' but he'd only just started his job at the University so I knew he wouldn't have been in the thick of it already. On second thought, I really wouldn't put it past him.

"Is there ever a time you do stop thinking about work?" I replied and smiled at him, this is when he turned to me and smirked. Jonathan rarely genuinely smiled, it was always that wry smirk of his that he exposed often. Something like this expression is usually used by someone who either wants to hide something or who feels awkward and doesn't quite know what to say. I suppose in Jonathan this was often the latter however he had an almost nervous disposition which often made it difficult to know what he was thinking. Though I've observed many things about him throughout the time I've known him, I have also noticed that a lot of the time, he's difficult to get in the mind of. The way his face would usually consist of either a blank expression or that smirk that could have been read in various ways. I often found myself thinking that he'd ironically be the perfect criminal if he were to become one*. He could easily fool anybody with that look but I have to admit that I've taken quite a liking to it over the years. It seems inappropriate to say it considering he's my friend but I have to say it's quite endearing.

"Well, you know the saying, there's no rest for the wicked." He said slyly and then looked away again. I stifled a giggle; the saying was quite funny to me concerning Jonathan. Especially since the word 'wicked' for me has always been associated with something like the wicked witch from the Wizard of Oz**. I got the image in my head of Jonathan standing in front of a big cauldron with all those little chemicals he used to have wearing one of those big black pointy hats. I just couldn't resist a small laugh escaping me.

"Wicked? Is that how you're describing yourself now?" I asked him and even though I couldn't quite see his face at this point because he was leaning too far forward, I could tell that the blank expression had surfaced again. Typical Jonathan.

"It's just a figure of speech Harleen. You really shouldn't take it so seriously." He informed me and it was something I already knew, he always was good at stating the obvious.

"I know, I was joking," I replied bluntly but he ignored it.

"What time do you leave tomorrow?" he asked and I didn't see what difference this would have made but at least if we had a proper conversation I could possibly steer it toward what I wanted to know so I told him.

"Well I'll have to leave a little earlier than I thought. Probably around 5 o'clock, I need to pick up a few things from the store, a new toothbrush and things like that. I figured if I come home to visit then I can just keep the ones I've got here to use." It's safe to say that I had planned on coming back to Gotham often for visits to Pammy and Jonathan but this never really happened which I regret. I've visited Gotham a total of three times over the past 5 years; one of these times was of course that unforgettable Thanksgiving Day with my parents. The other two were spent with Pammy; Jonathan was always 'too busy'. About 2 years ago I'd heard of him losing his job at the University and getting his foot in the door at Arkham. The last I heard from Pammy, he was practically running the place, a pretty big achievement by any standards considering Arkham's importance to the city. However, I suppose his father's contribution to the place beforehand did play to his advantage.

"Hmm, it's typical of you to say that. You haven't even left yet and you're already thinking of visiting. If I were you I wouldn't come back at all." He smirked again and I wondered what he meant by this, the way he said it almost suggested he didn't want me to come back. The thought didn't pass me by that Jonathan could have been that bitter about me leaving that he didn't wish to see me again after I made the move to New York.

"What are you trying to say?" I asked him and his face didn't change at all the whole time he looked at me.

"I'm trying to say that if I had the choice of moving to New York, I wouldn't come back to Gotham for anything or anybody." He told me and I could understand why he'd say this but I really didn't consider that anything would have stopped me from visiting him and Pammy in Gotham.

"Why, did you think I was trying to get rid of you for good?" He asked with a hint of sarcasm and I took this to mean he wanted to have a joke with me – something I wasn't used to when it came to him so I played along, maybe a tad too much though.

"Well I wouldn't put it past you; I know how intimidated you are by me. This town ain't big enough for the both of us Johnny boy," I joked before giving an exaggerated a wink. However the smirk fell from his face and his eyebrows furrowed slightly, a rare occurrence with Jonathan concerning his facial expressions were always kind of limited. It sounds strange to say it but I actually felt honoured that I'd caused this look of confusion.

"Are you drunk?" he asked me and I shook my head slightly. I didn't want to overdo it again otherwise he'd know I was lying. For some reason I felt I could outsmart him; which with my intoxication would have made it ten times more difficult than it would have been if I were stone cold sober.

"No, I'm just," I paused to try and find a word as I looked away from his slightly perplexed gaze. What was the word I wanted to say? What would be convincing to tell him? And then it finally came out.

"Happy," I finalised and I looked back at him just in time to see him smirk and shake his head in quiet disapproval of my condition. He knew and there was no hiding that. Of course he did.

"As well as having had too much to drink." He said and impulsively my head told me to deny it again but I didn't bother. He could probably smell it on me which would have made it blindingly obvious.

"But I don't blame you for being happy; I would be too if I could leave here." He concluded before exhaling deeply. I never thought that Jonathan would have possessed these feelings of wanting to leave Gotham; though he would often complain about the state of the place but then would reverse this by saying it was the perfect place for his research. Looking back on it, in a way I think he was actually giving excuses for being too afraid to move out, after all he never stated why Gotham was the best place for whatever he was trying to achieve. It was odd but then again, I suppose that was Jonathan through and through.

"Then why don't you?" I asked him, though I knew he'd just been hired to work at Gotham University, surely that wasn't worth being unhappy over. However Jonathan didn't seem to quite comprehend this as the look of uncertainty still hadn't left his face.

"Hmm?" he replied as though he hadn't been listening when I knew full well that he was. It kind of annoyed me how he felt he had to hide everything from me, I wanted him to open up but then I suppose the same could be said about me. We're evidently too alike in that sense.

"If you hate it so much here then why don't you just leave? You're always complaining about it." I asked and he appeared to think about this for a minute before giving me his trademark smirk again.

"Was that an offer for me to join you Miss. Quinzel?" he asked and I wasn't sure how to take this because of course, it wasn't intended to be an invitation. This added to what Pammy had told me about his feelings for me made the whole thing that much more awkward. Did he actually want to come with me? And if so, was he suggesting he wanted to live with me? Whatever he meant by it I'm not sure but to this day I still struggle to figure out whether he was indeed joking with me or not but then Jonathan rarely ever joked about anything unless he was using unnecessarily harsh sarcasm. Now the thought occurs to me that the intoxication had clouded my ability to distinguish the sarcasm in his voice as there didn't appear to be any. Unsure of how to answer him, I ignored the question and corrected him instead.

"That's Dr. Quinzel," I told him and I guess I was being a little flirtatious but then Jonathan knew it was the drink making me behave in such a way. However he pretended to ignore this and I could tell her was attempting to mask a laugh when his smirk widened. Evidently he'd thought of something that amused him.

"I beg to differ, especially after reading over those dissertations of yours during college." He slyly remarked and I couldn't help but smile at this as I shook my head. I looked up at the stars again and the way they lit up the night sky was the most beautiful thing. I've always been a night person which I suppose is a positive thing when you grow up in Gotham. Darkness is something that's unavoidable in that city.

"You haven't seen the best of me yet Crane; I'll be making a real difference in the field of criminal psychoanalysis really soon. Just you wait and see."I told him as I continued to smile contently at the glittering stars above. Jonathan joined me in looking at the stars and it would have been romantic if there wasn't that undeniable feeling of awkwardness there after what Pammy had said.

"I somehow doubt that Harley," he replied and this time I could hear the sarcasm seeping out of him. It actually caught me off guard because Jonathan never called me Harley, ever. He preferred to call people by their birth names but then again, he was brought up this way by his pretentious mother Nancy so this really doesn't surprise me.

"So it's Harley now? I thought you always hated that nickname." I turned to look at him and noticed that the smirk had disappeared from his face. He shrugged and appeared indifferent as though something had upset him.

"Well I don't see why I can't call you it now, it's not like I'll have to say it on a regular basis." And that was all I needed. There was a distinct bitterness in the way he said it, as though I'd betrayed him in some way. Though it did make me feel somewhat guilty at first, there was no doubt that nothing could make me change my mind about moving to New York. It was already made up by then.

"Besides, Johnny isn't exactly a favourite of mine." He added, probably to avoid an uncomfortable silence once he realised that what he'd just said was a little out of order and I couldn't help but giggle at it. I always have found it funny that little things like that really get on his nerves.

"Alright, I take it back," I told him and he smirked slightly at me before looking back towards the stars. I always figured that Jonathan was a night person like me. His generally quiet nature told me this was true. At that moment for some reason the thought came to me what it would be like to be with Jonathan and in all honesty, I didn't think it'd be all that bad. After all, we had a lot in common intellectually and our personalities complimented each other in a strange way. Also sitting under the stars together combined with my drunken behaviour was enough to trigger these thoughts. As we sat in silence my mind began to cook up various scenarios of me and him being together. For some reason the image of me and him getting married entered my mind but this was probably due to me subconsciously remembering what my mother said about it all those years earlier. It's kind of eerie now that I think about that image but it is quite funny still, I was drunk after all. It was these images however that finally caused me to pluck up the courage to ask him what I wanted to ask. I figured I had nothing to lose either way. Not that this made it any less awkward of course.

"Jonathan, could I ask you something?" I began to which he turned to me in a suggestion to continue and I could instantly feel my cheeks warming up. The vodka really had gone to my head.

"I'm going to be straight with you. I just heard something and I want to know the truth about it." I told him and another achieved look of confusion grew on his face.

"Alright," he replied with a hint of concern behind his voice. I still think to this day that deep down he knew what I was about to ask him. He must have. He was too intuitive not to notice but he was playing oblivious just to be safe I suppose.

"Look um," I stumbled and felt myself growing more nervous by the second. I was beginning to wonder whether this was a good idea but it was too late to go back now. Any made up on the spot question would be too obvious for him to detect now.

"Right I don't know how to put this so I'll just come straight out and ask you." I told him and he smirked at how nervous I was, he knew I was afraid and he evidently loved every second of it. There was no doubt that he was definitely still that strange little boy at heart.

"Then go ahead," he replied coolly. He gave the impression that he was in control of the situation which he probably was to tell the truth.

"Okay, well...do you have feelings for me?" I spluttered out nervously and I became even more nervous when his eyebrows furrowed in what appeared to be a mixture between anger and bewilderment. Though he probably knew I was going to say it, now that I had it must have really come as a shock to him that I had done so.

"Excuse me?" he replied before sitting there in silence for a second or two and although it was only a short silence, it seemed to last a lifetime. This was just too awkward for words. I looked down at the top step of the porch that I was sitting on. Jonathan was sitting on the second now and exactly when this had happened I wasn't sure of but he had evidently moved away from me. I figured that despite his possible 'undying love for me' that he may still not want to be as close to me physically as he was when I took a seat next to him on the step. I really didn't get what the hell was wrong was this guy and as I thought about this I began to feel myself get frustrated. What did he want? What was his damage? – What can I say? I was drunk.

"Somebody told me you had feelings for me, apparently you have for a while now." I informed him and he wasn't amused by this in the slightest. He already knew who it was that told me this and this really irked him.

"You know how much I hate accusations Harleen and by the way, you don't need to protect her." He replied before turning away from me in evident disgust. I said nothing which he mistook as being through confusion. So he really wasn't as great at reading people as he thought he was. Mind you, even the best of us make mistakes in that sense from time to time.

"Don't play dumb with me. Acting naively doesn't make you any more attractive Harleen. You know who I'm talking about and I know she's the one that put that idea in your head." He carried on and I remained silent. I was furious with him now. I was tired of his rude behaviour. I was tired of his evident avoidance of simply answering the question. Why did he have to make things even more awkward than they already were by doing this? Then again, he always loved to create that awkwardness. It appeared to be something of a hobby of his. God knows I've experienced it enough over the years. With this stated, he still carried on talking.

"You know, maybe it's the best thing for you to be leaving Harleen. You don't need someone like that controlling every aspect of your life. Dependency on another human being is dangerous for ones mental health, you more than most people should know that." He concluded and looked back at me in what was evidently disappointment. What the hell was this guy's problem? I always knew him and Pammy didn't see eye to eye but he had no good reason for telling me to pretty much remove her from my life and this made me even more infuriated. How dare he do such a thing? Like I'd ever get rid of the best friend I've ever had. In his dreams maybe; then I realised it would suck big time to be with Jonathan. He would evidently want me to get rid of Pam and that was a huge no, no. It just wasn't going to happen. Ever. It makes me laugh now how much thought I was putting into this whole being with Jonathan thing. Like I really wanted to be with him in the first place; I didn't. Not one little bit.

"You know, Pammy's technically your friend too." I told him which technically was true. He stared at me for a while before answering as though he was unsure about whether to say what was about to come out of his mouth next.

"Well, I think you're forgetting that technically isn't the same as actually. Pamela Isley's technically my friend but you're actually my friend." He stated and I said nothing in return, I thought I'd let him carry on with this. What he didn't notice was that I was seething with anger beneath the surface.

"Pamela Isely only puts up with me for the sake of you. You seriously can't be thinking of telling me otherwise because in your current condition you'd make an even worse liar than you already are. After all I wouldn't want you to embarrass yourself in front of me now would I?" he asked rhetorically but this was what pushed me over the edge. This time I was going to reply.

"Alright, you know what? What the hell is your problem?" I asked with malice through gritted teeth. I didn't want to raise my voice in case Pammy came over to see what was going on.

"My problem?" he asked and I knew this wasn't rhetorical as the growing anger in his voice was unmistakeable. What annoyed me about this was that he had absolutely nothing to be angry about. I was the one suffering a verbal attack, not him. All I did was ask a question but maybe that was what had initially hit a nerve with him? Nevertheless, I carried on.

"Yes your problem, why do you have to be such an asshole about everything? You haven't even answered my question yet, you know all it takes is a simple yes or no Jonathan. And you know what? As far as what you just said about Pammy being bad for my mental health goes, I really don't think I asked for your opinion on that. I know that there's nothing wrong with me so stop trying to psychoanalyse everything and tell me there is." I told him and this was true. There was absolutely no reason for him to start trying to dissect what was wrong with my life and attempt to delve into my psyche but what I didn't realise was that this had unwillingly become an open invitation for him to delve even deeper.

"Well seeing as though you want to know truths, do you want to know one of the truths that I've discovered Harleen?" he began. The smugness in his voice was exuding as he smirked knowingly when he looked at me. He was really getting annoying.

"What? What is it?" I snapped through clenched teeth. I was pretty sure he loved this display of anger directed towards him. After all, anger was always something I never liked expressing so he must have felt excited to finally see me in action.

"The truth about you that I've known all these years is something you've just affirmed right there. That truth being that you know I can get into your head and that scares you. You're so secretive because of the fear you have of somebody actually knowing who you really are. You're afraid of being too close to somebody because you think they'll abandon you." And there it was. He'd affectively just repeated what Pammy had told me just minutes earlier. Where they planning this as some kind of joke to pull on me before I left? No, Jonathan would never collaborate with Pammy on anything and he never was one for jokes.

"Tell me, does Isley know that about you? Or has she only just figured that out?" he asked and it was obvious from the stretched smirk that he was enjoying this all too well. How dare he? I shook my head in disbelief at this, what gave him the right? Did he want me to belong to him or something? Want me all to himself? What was his problem? He still hadn't told me the answer to my question.

"I can't believe you're actually saying all this like I belong to you or something, I'm not yours Jonathan." I told him and he shook his head slightly as he looked away from me again.

"I never insinuated that you were." He stated, still refusing to look at me which was when I realised he was looking over at Pam who was still in a world of her own.

"I'm right though aren't I? About Isley, about everything," he asked as he looked at her. There was no hint of admiration in his eyes toward her. In fact, there appeared to be nothing but disgust for inflicting this problematic question on him. I was fuming. He was being a complete ass over a stupid little question that he still hadn't answered. I exhaled deeply trying to contain my anger and he noticed this.

"What?" he asked without even turning to look at me. So I decided to tell him exactly what was on my mind. No more beating around the bush.

"I'm leaving for New York tomorrow and instead of giving me a good night and a big send off, my two best friends feel the need to pull me apart and tell me who I am. Now I've always been close to Pammy but what the hell gives you the right? Is it because you're jealous of our friendship? Because I've never been that close to you? Or is it because you think you deserve your doctorate more than me? Because you got there first? Is that what it is? Tell me Jonathan." I told him firmly, like a mother addressing her child which made him remove his glasses and rub the bridge of his nose. Sighing, he finally turned around to look at me and I have to say, his eyes without those glasses were really beautiful. They twinkled as brightly as the stars did in the moonlight. I don't mean any of this in a romantic sense of course, that was just what came to my mind at the time.

"I think you've had a little too much to drink Harleen," he informed me as he looked up at me. I wondered whether he could actually see without those things on as they appeared to be so thick. I never did think to ask but there were other things on my mind at that moment.

"Cut it out and tell me the truth." I told him and I meant it whole heartedly. Though it was given that he had a point, I had had a little too much to drink. However, stating the obvious wasn't going to get him out of this and he suddenly realised this.

"Why do you want to know Harleen? Why is this so important to you? Is it because Isely said it? Because everything she says is gospel to you?" there was no hiding the fact that he was directing all of his anger towards Pammy. Then again, that was always something he did much too often.

"I know it's bothering you but it's not as though it would matter if I confirmed whether it was true or not. You're leaving tomorrow and I know you've got enough sense not to come back here so it wouldn't make a difference either way." And I took this to mean that it was true. He was masking it, badly. Lying never was one of Jonathan's strong points.*** But I was more shocked to think that he felt that way about me returning.

"Why wouldn't I come back? You and Pam are here and that's all the reason I need to come back." Of course I'd come back and I believed that with all my heart despite the state of the city. Sadly I didn't do this as much as I thought I would. Life always got in the way and I suppose this was the reason why Jonathan was always 'busy' as he must have been disappointed with me for going back on my word. Though he expected me to do this all along and thinking of it that way, I kind of don't blame him for not bothering with me anymore.

"Though I'd like to get carried away in that, we both know that this city is gradually getting worse. I know that's the real reason you're leaving. After all, who wants to be a psychiatrist for the criminally insane in a place where all the people who should be institutionalised are running rampant in the streets? Even the most privileged of people that live here aren't safe anymore.****" He was right. About everything – of course I didn't want to live in a crime ridden city. I wanted to be able to escape from my work when I needed to.

"Gotham's dying Harleen and it'll probably be a long time before somebody comes along to clean the mess we've created for ourselves.***** We're all waiting for it, I know I am. I'm waiting for it with bated breath." He told me but all he was doing was stating the obvious again. I already knew that Gotham was getting worse. I knew it was decaying from within but I also knew there'd always be that little beacon of hope that kept it chugging along. Someday, someone would indeed make a difference, like Jonathan said. However it was how that difference was achieved that concerned me. I knew it would eventually get to the point that it would take crime to beat crime. It would take some driving force to fight fire with fire so to speak.******

"That's a pretty bleak way to look at things." I told him and it was true. He was so negative about everything but I've always tried to be the optimistic type and needless to say, I still had faith in Gotham. However Jonathan didn't agree with my statement as he exhaled deeply before putting his glasses back on.

"It's not bleak, it's realistic. Let's face it; Gotham's now got the worst crime rate in the country. It's a breeding ground for desperation and fear." He told me and despite my intoxication I could tell this conversation was beginning to take a strange turn. The way he said the word 'fear' was rather odd. It was as though he'd been waiting to mention it, like the whole conversation had been building up to that one subject.

"Fear?" I questioned and he could tell that I was confused so he showed me that wry smirk of his again.

"Well it's quite relevant don't you think? The citizens, the people who steal to feed their families, even the police. They're all afraid of what could happen. They're scared; after all we're all afraid of something." And he was right again. It was no secret that the mob had already taken over the city. They'd been running it from the sidelines for years. Everybody in Gotham knew it but they refused to believe it was true. Not because they were in denial, but because they just didn't want to. Deep down they were afraid. Afraid of admitting that the city was no longer in the hands of decent people and that was the God honest truth.

"Well of course we're all afraid of something. It's basic human instinct." I told him and he was silent for a while as he turned up to look at the stars again. After a minute of eerie silence passed he sighed as though deep in thought about something and this intrigued me. What did he have on his mind?

"Tell me, what scares you the most Harleen?" he asked and I was dumbfounded. What kind of a question was that? Especially after him dissecting my apparent fears already but I thought about it for a while and went through a little list in my drunken mind – that was slowly beginning to sober up thanks to the cool night air. Clowns, I always thought they were a little creepy. I would never have considered it as being a fear though. Grasshoppers were kind of disgusting but again, it wasn't a fear. Being abandoned – abandonment. Jonathan had a point.

"A lot of things," I simply replied, I didn't want to tell him he was right. I'd never live that down. However he got the hint and decided not to press on any further.

"Point taken," he smirked and glanced at me with a mischievous look in his eyes. He could have been a real charmer if he worked a little harder at it. He definitely had potential to be popular with the ladies. He just didn't appear to want it all that much and was content enough to sit on the sidelines. The thought of him being gay did occur to me but I'd seen the way he would look at certain girls. The look of lust was unmistakeable but the truth was that Jonathan wasn't a lover or a fighter. He was a thinker. And it didn't seem to harm his career any, barring the fact he got fired from the University a couple of years later of course. He always had Arkham though. It was definitely his safety net.

"Listen, I don't want you to go away on a bad note so I apologise for my behaviour. I hope you accept it," this I could appreciate. This was Jonathan's way of telling me it was hard for him to see me go. He didn't want me to but I knew that already. Giving me this apology was something I needed to hear from him though. This affirmed it even more.

"I do," I told him and he seemed pretty content with this. There was another silence and then I realised I'd forgotten all about Pammy lying at the bottom of the garden. I squinted and looked over. I noticed her eyes were closed and it was either because she was sleeping or she was pretending to. When I turned my attention back to Jonathan I noticed that he was still staring at her too. Then I thought about everything he'd actually done for me, all the studies he'd introduced me to, all the jerks he'd told me to stay away from. In a way he was like the father I wished I had, he was a mentor to me as well as a friend. To be with him would be even more wrong than I initially thought it would be and parting from him after thinking everything over was a little overwhelming for me. I wanted him to know how much he meant to me and considering how things turned out, I'm glad that I did.

"You know Jonathan; you're always telling me things. Telling me to stop gymnastics, telling me to stay away from idiot guys, you've always been there to tell me things. I want to thank you for that. And you know what? It means a lot to me because I have to tell you, you sure do care a lot for someone who's afraid of showing it." I couldn't hide the fact that I'd studied him too. Of course I had, it's my profession to study the behaviour of others. That and my intuition wouldn't allow me not to. But I have to say that the look on his face was priceless. It was pure bewilderment and I couldn't help but stifle a laugh.

"Oh don't look so shocked Mr. Crane. Like you really thought I hadn't already put you under the microscope too. I have, so many times." I exaggerated the 'Mr' on purpose just as he had the 'Miss' earlier which he found amusing and suppressed a laugh by raising a fist to his mouth and gently coughing. Very gentlemanly.

"Just out of curiosity, what exactly do you know about me that I haven't already told you?" and I could hear a hint of worry in his voice.

"Everything," the look of confusion was there again.

"And nothing," I added with a wink after a brief pause and he smiled at this. Genuinely smiled and it was a beautiful smile at that. It was then I decided that he needed to do this a lot more. I returned the look and we sat there looking at each other for a while. Running through our minds were the missed opportunities and even more words that would never be said. We both knew we could have made a pretty good couple if we were both slightly different. If we didn't have those fears of ours – but then we both knew it would never happen.

"HARLEY! Harleen darling, come and say hello to your Aunt Jem and Uncle Geoffrey!" The moment was interrupted by my mother's voice faintly screeching from inside. She didn't bother to venture out which was lucky for Jonathan as she would have definitely forced him to go inside and make the subject of us being a couple surface for everyone to witness this time. That and Nancy would pounce on him like a piece of fresh meat. I supposed she only did this with an audience around, she was definitely the type. After all, she did have mental health issues.

"I'd better go," I told him and he stood up, taking my hand to help me onto my feet. He must have thought I was much drunker than I actually was but then again, he was probably just making fun of me.

"Me too," he said as he helped me up and proceeded to step off the porch. Where did he have to suddenly rush off to? I wondered this to myself.

"Going to take another call?" I pried and gave him a little smirk which he expectedly returned.

"Something like that," he replied and I couldn't help but take this as his final goodbye. The way he said it as though his mind was elsewhere was proof enough of this.

"Ah, so I take it you're not planning on returning from this phone call of yours then?" I asked him to which he put his hands in his pockets and examined the ground beneath him before looking back up at me swiftly.

"Looks like it," he told me with no smirk this time. I couldn't help but wonder how hard he was actually taking it. It should have worried a little more really because he was making it pretty clear that he knew he'd never see me again.

"Well then," I started and he stood there looking anxious as I stood off the porch to stand next to him.

"I'll see you when I see you Johnny," I told him playfully and smiled but he didn't seem so amused this time.

"Hmm, good luck. And I don't just mean that for when you walk through that door in a few seconds." he replied, gesturing toward the door with a tilt of his head and I laughed slightly.

"Thanks," and then came one of the most awkward moments of my life. The forced hug, I didn't want to make him do it but the alcohol and my feelings took over my actions at that moment. I rushed in putting my arms around him and had to resist squeezing the poor guy within an inch of his life. I didn't feel his arms around me at first which I expected but after a couple of seconds I felt his hands on my shoulders, one of them patting me. It definitely wasn't what anyone would call an affectionate hug but if you knew Jonathan, it was. My mother's voice screeched for me again and it was definitely closer this time so I removed myself from Jonathan. It would have been fun trying to explain that after all. She would have locked me up in the house to stop me from going to New York and would have had the wedding planner out the very next day. We glanced at each other knowingly and I made my way back up the steps when I was stopped by his voice again.

"Oh and Harley," he started and I turned around. He called me Harley and this time it was through genuine caring. I was in shock so I took my hand off the door knob and turned around. He was still standing there, he hadn't moved an inch. He'd been watching me the whole time and I thought after that hug that he would've been out of there faster than I got through the back door.

"Hmm?" I simply replied, at a loss for words.

"Don't be a stranger," he smirked again and all I gave him in return was a smile and a nod. Then he walked around the side of the house and out of sight. Not daring to look back at me.

"I won't," I replied quietly to myself. He was gone. He didn't say goodbye to Pammy but then that was expected. So with that I walked into the house through the back door to reluctantly greet my aunt and uncle. Pammy stayed in the garden on the grass till I escaped the house once more to give me a tearful goodbye.

And that was the last time I ever saw Jonathan Crane.

* Foreshadowing of Scarecrow, Harleen already sees his potential to become a criminal. I wanted to display her intelligence through her intuitive nature with this.

** Wicked witch + Wizard of Oz = the Scarecrow – see the connection? ;D Haha I'm so cheesy :P

*** Reference to my 'Batman Origins: Jonathan Crane' in which Jonathan states the same thing about himself!

**** Reference to Thomas & Martha Wayne being murdered but obviously this was years before this event.

***** Jonathan is hinting towards The League of Shadows in 'Batman Begins' but obviously he's not aware of them as of yet. Acting more of a foreshadowing for now :P

****** Reference to the Batman YEY! :D Foreshadowing of Mr. Dark Knight!

A lot of references I know but hey, I couldn't resist pointing them all out! :P
Also I will tell you that Jonathan moving down a step on the porch is there to symbolise that he's already beginning his decent into criminality. Harleen's leaving and he's feeling lost – aww poor Johnny :[ Just a subtle symbol there for ya! ;]
Is everyone ready for more Eddie in the next chapter? I hope so!